Deprivation
by AliciaW68
Summary: Edward is deprived of Intimacy, his love of anonymous sex growing old, Bella is deprived of a satisfying love life but her friends think they have the answer to that. Follow their lives as fate keeps them apart or does it ?
1. Deprivation chapter 1

_**This is my new story, it started out from a comment Edlovesme made when she was pre reading 'That Night', the thought stuck with me and so here we are again .**_

 _ **Before we begin a big thank you to AG who is my beta again, to Edlovesme for the wonderful idea and plot and for agreeing to pre read again and a special mention to Rita01tx she came up with the perfect title. Thank you all of you, you keep me sane and on track.**_

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

 **Deprivation**

BPOV

Lying here, counting the cracks in the ceiling I make a mental note to speak to my landlord because there are definitely three new huge cracks up there that weren't there the last time James was using my pussy as a trampoline. Yes, I know I really shouldn't be concentrating on the ceiling but it's my own fault because I really expected things to be different this time. I don't know why I'm surprised; the last time I let him come home with me I redesigned the colour palette for the living room and decided on the pattern and fabric for my new curtains while he was 'worshipping me'. His words not mine. I know I sound like a nasty ungrateful bitch, but I'm really not. I'm horny, frustrated and confused and if I'm completely honest, lonely and scared that I'm going to go through life on my own with a vagina that has healed up.

James is not a bad lover really. He is not selfish or in a hurry, he knows where all the important areas are and he pays attention, in fact he tries really hard to give me an 'earth shattering orgasm.' I have tried to tell him that I'd be happy to have just a little ripple, but I've come to the conclusion that my lady bits don't work. I have only had three lovers in my dismal excuse for a sex life but that's enough to convince myself I have the problem not them.

Jacob was my first and he was my high school sweetheart. We lived the whole cliché when he took my virginity on prom night in the back of his mini- van, on a smelly old mattress. It wasn't earth shattering or even earth shaking. I put my lack of orgasms that night down to both of us being young and inexperienced, he was your classic fumbling teenager and I was no better. We tried to experiment after that fateful night, but when you only have the back of a minivan to stretch out in, things are not exactly conducive to a fulfilling sex life.

We were together all of our Senior year but he didn't cope at all with us being apart when I went off to college in Chicago. The distance was just too far as he stayed to work in his dad's business at home. His jealousy got out of hand if I didn't answer my phone or be available to dial into Skype session instantly and he would scream and shout at me all the time, so we spent most of our time arguing. Eventually we just stopped calling each other and a few months later my dad dropped into one of our weekly phone catch up conversations that Jacob had got a local girl from his reservation, Leah, pregnant. I have to admit I was relieved and I took great delight in listening to my dad tell me about how badly Jacob and Leah's parents had taken the news.

My second lover was a guy called Marcus. He was on the same course as me at North western and we started out as friends first. You know the usual going out for coffee after lectures, then working together on projects before a group of us went out to celebrate someone's birthday. That night, after too many cocktails, we ended up in a heavy make out session in the back of a club. While I was in that state of drunkenness, the one where you love everything and everybody I was fine. I was really in to him, we had a good fumble in the dark passage way at the back of the club and I had my first taste of 'not quite all the way sex' in public. I even managed to a have an orgasm as he took me against the wall in the dark, under the stairwell. While we didn't actually fuck, he got me off with his fingers and so began my first grown up relationship.

Unfortunately as soon as I was sober and over the mortification of what I'd done in a public place, the problems began. When I told Marcus that he'd given me my first orgasm ever he was so proud. Problem was this turned him into some sort of sex fiend and he tried to jump me at every available opportunity so he could continue my "education". He was a firm believer that women could have many different types of orgasm that were dependent on where, when, how and what position they were in at the time. I proved to be the flaw in his orgasm theory. Never again did he manage to even raise a smile down there. It all became too much for him and even though we both agreed it was all my fault he explained I was draining all his sexual energy and he needed to be with other women to recharge it. Who was I to argue? So I let him walk away and instead I purchased the first of what is now quite a large collection of mostly redundant vibrators and dildos. At least they hang around and don't disappear off for other women.

As I lie here, James, lover number three, is still trying to stimulate my clit, suck on my neck and search for my illusive G-spot all at the same time. I don't have the heart to disappoint him, so I let out a well-practiced moan, and wriggle around a bit. All I really want to do at this moment is to suck him off, so he can come and then fall asleep, so it will all be over. He's even managed though to ruin that for me though, because in general I do really love sucking a long thick dick. The taste, the feel of the ridges on my lips as I move up and down it, that tiny little slit in the top and best of all, the feeling as it slips down my throat and for that spilt second when I want to fight it but I don't, I swallow and feel the power I have over my partner.

The problem with James though is that his dick smells funny, and not in a good way. I don't know what it is, I really can't decide what the smell even is, at first I thought he was a typical male who didn't wash himself or his undies enough, but it's not that. So now I can't go down on him until I know what that smell is and I have considered squirting him with Oust to see if that gets rid of it, but figured he'd notice me doing that. So even that pleasure is denied to me right now; thanks James.

Light bulb moment - Perhaps though that's it; perhaps I need to feel in control, perhaps I'm lying here feeling nothing because I'm being passive and just letting him get on with it. To test out the theory I decide to take control. I move from under him and turn him onto his back so I can ride him at my pace. James looks slightly stunned, his face showing the questions that must be floating around in his brain. I put my hands on his chest for support and as I lower myself onto his dick and I wait for something to happen. I slowly pick up the pace until I'm really going for it, my body is rising and falling on his dick, then I attempt doing a figure eight movement and finally I lean forward hoping to brush my clit against him. I'm concentrating hard, trying to decide if I can feel anything when he comes inside me. Great! I stop what I'm doing and watch the contentment on his face as he lets the wave of endorphins sweep through his body. I'm so jealous because I really want that feeling.

What is wrong with me?


	2. Deprivation chapter 2

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the character

EPOV

"Oooohhhh, OOOOHHHH,OoooHHHh"

Oh Fuck! She's a moaner. I can't stand it when they moan and groan and make stupid noises. I'm fucking her for fuck sake, and at this particular moment we are against a wall in a dark alleyway with people walking along the street just a few feet away from us. Now I have no problem being watched but I'm certainly not going to go out and purposely attract attention.

"Aaahhhhhh, oh baby yes yesyesyesyesyes"

Oh shit that does it, I need to finish and finish quick or Ed Junior is going to stop wanting to play. I increase the speed of my thrusting and grab her hair to pull her head back. If I do it hard enough she may shut up and let me finish in peace. Luckily this works. One of the many advantages of fucking from behind is that I don't have to look at their faces, I don't have to kiss them and I can control them touching me. As I feel my balls start to tingle and the muscles in my stomach grip I increase yet again and unload deep into her pussy. Not that I'm really bothered (but it's good form to feel her come as well, because I'm not totally an insensitive asshole), her pussy clenches my dick and I feel the tell-tale shudder, fortunately with no loud accompaniment. With no time to lose, because I need to get out of here before all the 'emotions' appear , I pull straight out and take off the condom, tie it off and toss it into the dumpster at the side of us. Such a classy place to fuck but if I'm going to pick up strangers in clubs and bars then back alleys and car parks are as good as it's going to get.

Just as I start to straighten my pants she turns around to face me and I think... here we go I'm going to get the 'I don't usually do this type of thing' or 'I'm not really that sort of girl but…' I wish they wouldn't bother. They are that type of girl or they wouldn't be out here fucking in an alleyway. Why can't they be honest? All they have to do is just admit they fancied me and were horny and wanted to fuck. It's that easy.

Luckily for me just before she could start to make her excuses an enormous rat ran out from behind the dumpster. Clearly he obviously had enough manners to wait until we'd finished for which I'm grateful, but as soon as she saw it the screaming started. Not wanting to attract any further attention I quickly pulled her towards the back door of the club we came out of and pushed her through it.

"I'm just going to go and clean up sweetheart, I'll see you back at the bar" I said as I made my way away from her toward the area of the restrooms. As soon as I'm out of her sight, I turn around and make my way, using the crowd as cover, back to my friends who I'm out with. Emmett and Jasper were still sitting at the VIP table we had reserved and by the looks of it had been joined by some females I didn't know.

"There you are you randy fucker!" Emmett shouted out as soon as he saw me,

"Randy, where the fuck... actually what the fuck does that mean?" I asked as I sat in my still vacant chair.

"Apparently it's English for horny" he explained. "Don't you think it sounds so much better than horny, because I do and I may use it all the time now!"

"Fuck off Emmett! I left College three years ago and I don't need language lessons from someone who is captivated and practically obsessed with all things English". I snapped as I threw back the now warm beer and scotch chaser that was sitting waiting for me.

"What's got up your ass, didn't you manage to score in the alley?" Jasper asked.

"Yes I did, she just managed to ruin the experience by being a moaner. What is it with the women I pick up? Why can't they just be quiet when I'm fucking them? I'm seriously thinking of keeping a gag in my pocket so I can ask them to put it on before we get down to it." I joked.

"Err... as I think you are joking I won't panic, but just in case you're not, if you get searched for any reason people will not look kindly at someone with a gag in their pocket. Especially true if it's winter and you have gloves on, you'll look like a trainee pervert." Emmett was laughing so hard by the time he finished trying to get out what had started as a gentle warning I almost missed what he was getting at.

"I know, and believe it or not I am joking. I just need something different. I can't keep picking up women like this anymore, it's getting harder to come and I'm getting less and less out of it." I explained

"You could always get a proper girlfriend, you know one whose name you knew and you could talk to. Maybe she would even let you indulge in your little kink" Jasper said.

"Not ready for that yet mate, when I finally settle down it will be because I've found Miss Perfect and at the moment I really don't think she exists. Anyway neither of you have proper girlfriends so why are you lecturing me?" I asked as I threw back the rest of my warm beer and looked around for the waitress.

"We don't have girlfriends no, but we both have excellent sex lives thank you very much. " Emmett said looking at the girl sitting on his knee.

To be honest I had all but forgotten the two girls that were sitting with us. One was on Emmett's knee and the other was sitting on the sofa at the side of Jasper. I had obviously stopped whatever they had going on when I came back.

"Does anyone want another round?" I asked as the waitress finally responded to my wave.

"I'll have a martini," Jasper's girl answered "and a cranberry and vodka for Tanya please"

"Beer please" said Emmett and as I looked at Jasper he nodded.

Placing the order and adding a beer and a scotch for me I got up and walked to the glass wall that overlooked the dance floor. We were high enough up that I could see most of it but anyone looking up could only see the smoky glass. The glass was the reason I loved this club, if I saw someone who took my fancy I could swoop in, literally charm their panties off, fuck them and them hide upstairs in the VIP area never to be seen again. Nobody got up here without either an invitation or occasionally a pre booking. As Jasper owned the place, we had a permanent table tucked away in a corner that allowed us all the privacy we wanted.

I settled back down and took in the people around me in the VIP area. Some were sat chatting, some were quite obviously flirting and others were just there really to have a good night and let off steam. I recognised a few familiar faces some of them good clients of Jasper's, no fuck buddies though. Nobody seemed unhappy or lonely and the atmosphere was different very different to downstairs. Up here it was quite relaxed whereas downstairs it was dark, sweaty and very sexual.

I loved being downstairs. I loved close proximity of people and the sex laden atmosphere. I was tempted to venture back down there to see if I could pick up another willing partner, but I couldn't risk bumping into ….. Shit! I'd never even asked her name. What is wrong with me? I'm such a Shit.

The waitress brought us our drinks and I knocked my scotch straight back and picked up my beer. I needed to change, I couldn't keep doing this. I just felt empty and annoyed at myself as soon as everything was over, and even the thrill of it wasn't like it once was. The buzz from the alleyway was already long gone.


	3. Deprivation Chapter 3

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

BPOV

After James left the next morning I was determined to try and figure out what was wrong with me. I spent most of the day with my trusty laptop, a bottle of Merlot, some cheese and crackers and a large bowl of strawberries and grapes. I'd come up with a great idea, if I did enough research surely something would spark my interest , as soon as it did I could concentrate on that and see if that was what ' my thing' perhaps all my problem was, was that I hadn't found 'my thing' yet.

A couple of hours later I shuddered as I went from one website to another, using links to lead me. I was shocked, stunned, amused, amazed and sickened by some of the sights I came across. I'd never even heard of half the fetishes I read and saw pictures about and I really didn't understand the appeal of them either. That alone told me it wasn't for me so I moved on looking at everything from the classic BDSM sites to some that involved people having sex with their cars (how is that even possible?) to websites that were definitely not for the easily offended amongst us.

Three and a half hours, one empty bottle of wine and some cheese crumbs later I was more depressed than ever. Not even a slight twinge, not a drop of moisture or even a fidget to get some friction from the seam in my jeans. Nothing!

Well I knew I wasn't into fetish life then. I really didn't see myself as some daddy's little girl, I was far too out spoken and independent for that and I certainly couldn't be anyone's slave or submissive for the same reason. I really didn't want to be responsible for a submissive either so being a Dominant was out as well. I wondered if I was into women, so quickly brought up some lesbian porn sites so I could watch two women together.

Another bottle of wine later I was sure I wasn't gay. Whilst I enjoyed watching the women, it was more about 'the watching' for interest than being turned on by 'the doing' so I moved on to looking at threesomes, foursomes and then orgies. My first thoughts are always the ones to trust, and all I could think was 'how messy' and 'how the hell did he/she manage to cope with that entire dick?', or' how is it possible to even get in that position?'

I certainly did not want to have to cope with looking at four or five different people while I tried to get off, and what happens afterwards? Do they all sit round and have tea and biscuits and discuss it? Err no thanks.

By the end of bottle three I was quite convinced I was probably asexual. I was horny though but I put that down to the wine and the fact James hadn't managed to even raise a flicker in me at all. Collapsing on my bed in a drunken haze I reached for my favourite vibrator. At 8 inches long and so wide that it filled me completely it was textured and ridged so I could feel it against my insides. I loved this one because it was the only one out of all the many versions I'd tried that managed to get any sort of reaction out of me, so much so it got the name 'Pete the Pussy Tamer'. Stupid I know, but Pete was my only hope of having any sort of orgasm at this moment in time. I finally managed to fight my way out of my clothes and after getting comfortable I started to rub my pussy lips. I slowly turned him on building the vibrations running all over my lips and clit and finally I could feel it; that feeling as the orgasm builds, my stomach reacting, my legs wanting to bend and open up more and the juices in my usually very dry pussy, coating me. As I started to work Pete in and out, I brought my finger down to play with my clit, I was really going to go for it, desperate to release some stress and pressure. My finger worked slowly, circling and rubbing my clit, Pete was working well, in and out with my hips thrusting up to meet him. Suddenly I was there, a slight ripple as my clit throbbed, once, twice, three times and then it was over. That was it, I felt my stomach muscles relax and no matter how long I kept Pete going, that was it. Thankful I had felt something, anything, and it was better than nothing, I settled back on my pillows and switched Pete off. I placed him on my bedside table and fell into a drink and mini orgasm induced sleep.

My night though was very disturbing to say the least. I dreamt of being on one long show reel of all the websites I'd looked at. I had nightmare after nightmare of being tied up and whipped while wearing a diaper, next I was someone's pet being led around on a dog lead attached to a collar at my neck and then I saw myself standing over a trussed up James and laughing hysterically as I peed all over him, (this dream woke me up and sent me dashing to the bathroom to empty my very full bladder). After a quick but very small glass of water I settled back down to sleep. This time I was being worshipped on an altar and then sacrificed, this woke me up with a start and even though I tried to go back to sleep again I eventually gave in and got up to watch the dawn break. I learnt my lesson, no more porn sites or cheese before going to bed, come to think of it, lay off the wine too…

I didn't want to be celibate or asexual, in fact I realised you can miss what you've never had. I just wanted to have a normal sex life, not that I was quite sure after last night what normal was, but in my own mind I knew I needed to connect with someone intimately, someone who knew how to make my girly bits sing and that wasn't going to happen without me putting in a lot of effort.

It was time to bring in reinforcements. I needed to confide in my girlfriends, they had known me since college, Rosalie even longer, but they had no idea of how I was struggling with all this. They just thought I had a perfectly ordinary sex life, especially as I was with them the night I brought James home.


	4. Deprivation Chapter 4

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

EPOV

I came home alone as usual. Truth is I have never brought a woman back here because this is my refuge, my safe haven. I very rarely even invite the guys here to crash or just to watch a game. I realised I needed my own space after what seems like years of sharing apartments with different people and now I was finally able to afford my own place. It was an apartment on the 12th floor of a decent block. I had a balcony that overlooked the neighbourhood, there really wasn't any privacy, but all I did was sit out there, read and drink beer so it that wasn't a problem.

The décor screamed rich bachelor. I knew that and was another reason why I didn't bring women back here. I was wealthy, but from family money so I very rarely touched it. I chose to work hard and I live within my earned means, which to be fair weren't too shabby either. I kept my wealthy side secret from everybody except Jasper and Emmett. They understood my need for secrecy because Jasper was wealthy, on paper anyway, from the club and the bar he owned and Emmett was a professional soccer player. Not a star goalkeeper or anything like that, but he played for the Chicago Fire soccer team and was well known in the city and was sort of a local celebrity, anonymous though anywhere outside of the state.

I had graduated with a first class business degree from Northwestern and even though I didn't need to work I chose to. During my last year of college I spent ages looking around for a business opportunity that interested me but nothing did until a throw away comment from Emmett gave me an idea I ran with. We were sitting in the sauna of our local gym, wearing nothing but small towels because we weren't allowed to be naked, when some women came in and asked him for his autograph. Where the fuck they thought he would get a pen and paper from in a Sauna I'm not sure, but after explaining he would sort something out for them later he got up and left. Following him I caught up with him in the changing room,

"What was that all about, why did you leave the sauna?" I asked him

"Look, I'm supposed to be a hard ass soccer player. How the hell can I relax in the sauna, whinge about the heat and then have a relaxing massage and facial without someone commenting or putting on twitter or Facebook that I'm a metrosexual who looks after their skin?"

The thought stayed with me and as I looked around at all the male grooming products out there I quickly began to understand what Emmett was saying. Whilst women supposedly wanted men to be men, they also wanted men who looked after their bodies, moisturised their skin and had neat clean nails. Men also wanted to look after themselves but they had nowhere to go other than the normal spa or beauty salon, all the places that were frequented by hordes of women and made them feel uncomfortable and somewhere they didn't belong.

My business was born several months later. I bought an old spa that had gone out of business and totally remodelled it. It was a Gentlemen's club in the true sense of the word. Here men could come and have any number of treatments, from waxing to manicures, pedicures to massage. There was also a fully kitted out gym and weight room as well as a sauna and steam room. We were also lucky enough to have enough room for both a swimming and a plunge pool. I employed male and female staff, but with a strict policy of no hitting on the staff or the customers which applied to everyone. I allowed the customers to use the sauna and steam room naked if they wanted to, but swimwear had to be worn in the Jacuzzi and pools. The bar area was very masculine, all dark leather and chrome and whist I initially thought the interior designer was mad, it worked well. Seemingly the men needed to feel masculine after being pampered and massaged and the atmosphere of the bar area gave them that before they disappeared back in to the real world. We also had a full Barbers shop that offered old fashioned wet shaves in addition to haircuts. For the real metrosexuals amongst us I employed a hairdresser or "stylist" as he preferred to be known, who could colour and "create". It was amazing how many men wanted to have their hair washed, cut and blow dried, but wouldn't go anywhere near a normal salon. I remodelled the top floor into a high end men's clothing boutique, we stocked clothes from all the best lines and designers but we also had an old fashioned Saville row tailor on call who could create anything from a pair of dress pants to a full dinner suit. I know everyone is label mad, and you can quite easily be judged on whether you are wearing this year's Dior or not but our older members just wanted something that fit well and was excellent quality. I have to say I agree with them.

Our membership was up to 1000 within about a year of opening and I was already looking for new premises to open another Gentlemen's spa on the other side of the city, to meet what appeared to be growing demand, as space was limited in the current building. If that went well the plan was to start expanding into other cities, although remaining in Illinois for the time being at least.

My life on paper was excellent. I was independently wealthy, had a very successful business and a great family and friends. I didn't need a girlfriend but I did need to sort out my sex life. I had to figure out what I wanted because I couldn't keep picking up anonymous women and fucking them in alley ways. Never mind eventually getting old it already was.

Truth is I had to find another way to indulge what I needed/ wanted but before I could do that I needed to understand what that actually was.


	5. Deprivation Chapter 5

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

BPOV

I'd been trying to get up the courage to speak to Rosie and Bree, I knew they wouldn't judge me or anything but I was still wary of how I could approach the subject of my lack of orgasms with them.

We had planned a night out. We were trying to get together at least once a week and at the moment we were managing that. Instead of going out I called them and invited them to my place for a change so I could cook, get them relaxed and tipsy and ask for some advice.

They were both up for a girlie night in and it quickly escalated to a sleepover and an extended invitation to Kate, Tanya and Irina. They each promised to bring a bottle and I set about putting dinner together. I knew how much alcohol was going to be sloshing about so decided on big plates of nacho's to start with melted cheese, sour cream and salsa and then I put a piece of pork in to slow roast so I could make pulled pork in barbeque sauce and serve it with homemade coleslaw and wraps. That way everybody could dig in and help themselves and I wouldn't be running backwards and forwards to the kitchen all night. I spent the rest of the day tidying up and arranging my guest room so I could accommodate five extra bodies. My king size bed would accommodate me Rose and Bree, we were used to crashing together, the others could fight it out over the couch, the spare bed and the recliner. I put clean towels in both bathrooms and I made sure I had lots of ice, lemon and salt because someone was bound to bring a bottle of tequila.

As the afternoon goes by I get myself ready. I put on some yoga pants and a sloppy tshirt as there is no need to dress up, we are just going to sit round talking, laughing and hopefully sorting out my disastrous sex life. I'm not quite ready for my pyjamas yet, but I know I'll change into them later as the night goes on. Bree arrives first at about 5.00pm, coming straight off her shift at the hospital. Bree is a midwife and to say how small and petite she is, it always amazes me she can make grown men shudder when they are in the delivery room. She takes great delight in making the partners suffer if they don't look after the new mum whilst they are in labour.

She was clutching a bottle of grey goose a few DVDs and a cake box. For someone who was so petite, Bree made it her mission to eat a lot of cake, and she never went to a party without some. Inside the box were six of the biggest cupcakes I'd ever seen.

Rose was next, clutching the afore mentioned bottle of Tequila plus lemons, limes and oranges, never wanting to discriminate against any citrus fruit she was happy to have them all. Rosie was a lawyer. She had finally finished law school, taken her bar exam and found a position at a large firm in town. They were working her hard, but she was ready for them, this was something she had wanted to do since she was a little girl and nobody was going to stop her.

Even though we had shared an apartment when we were at college, we had had to separate when the girls went off to further their education elsewhere. I stayed put as I was lucky enough to get a job where I had interned. I worked for one of the most prestigious publishing houses in the country and I had progressed fast. While the interns who had started with me were still assistants, I seem to have a serious ability to spot best sellers, being able to tell in the first ten pages of the original manuscript whether it's best seller material or not. I started to get noticed after my fifth pick hit the best seller chart and I was quickly promoted and have been twice more since. I now have my own corner office and I sit all day reading manuscripts and going over anything that the other Editors want to put forward for publishing. My job means I'm not really well liked at the office, but I can cope with that because I work more with our authors and they love me because I get their work published. For some of them it's a life's work or the story of someone they have loved and lost, but either way they know I treat their work as if it were my own, I treasure it for them.

Tanya, Kate and Irina arrived shortly after Rosie and Bree. We had become friends with them over time as we kept bumping into them around town. It was strange to see another three girls out together, groups are mostly even numbers so to bump into another threesome was unusual, so over the past year we had spent time together as a six. They came armed with half a dozen bottles of wine and a large selection of snacks. I got glasses out so everyone could start on the drinks and poured the snacks into bowls. Everyone got comfortable in my living room and I put some music on. It took us a couple of hours and most of the wine to finally all relax and get to that stage where the laughter was unrestrained and natural. Everyone changed into pyjamas and I cracked open the tequila and brought all the fruit and salt and put in on the floor in the centre.

I think it was Bree that suggested we play a drinking game, she wanted to do her version of truth and dare, we were all in the 'very merry' stage, everything was funny and all filters were gone. I should have known what was coming but I was as drunk as the rest of them so when it finally came out I gave them all both barrels. The question came out about a third of the way down the bottle

Irina asked "What's the most orgasms you've had at any one time?

As the room erupted with laughter and the girls started shouting out numbers I sat stunned, you mean you could have more than one? I knew I'd read about the women in my erotic novels having multiple orgasms, but I thought that was just for the stories, like anal sex and double penetration, everybody knew about it but nobody ever did it really.

Rose was looking at me strangely and I so I said in my drunken state "what?"

"We're waiting for your answer Bella, come on fess up"

"Oh sorry I missed that, what were the scores?" I asked

"Well not wanting to brag but I had a one night stand with a soccer player a while back and he made me come five times over the space of about 90 minutes, Tanya, Bree and Kate are admitting to four and Irina three, so what about you?"

I looked around the group and wondered whether to lie or be honest but after knocking back another tequila I decided honesty was the best policy.

"I've never had a proper orgasm ever. I can have a very weak one if I concentrate and use my vibrator, but during sex, it's never happened."

You've heard the saying' you could have heard a pin drop' well that's exactly what happened, everyone just looked at me with their mouths open, then they looked at each other and then back at me. Finally Rose said "Shit, shit, shit" and poured everyone a drink.

Bree was the next to speak ….

"Explain"

Was the word that came out, but it was a command not a question.

I sat back on my sofa and let out a huge sigh, it's amazing how quickly you can sober up when something is thrown at you.

"You know I have had very limited experience because I've only had three partners but none of them have ever managed to make me orgasm. Well that's not exactly true, Marcus managed once with his fingers but that's all."

Again silence, lots of silence, "Is it really that unusual? I mean it's a well-known fact that years ago women just laid back and let it happen. Perhaps that what I'm made for, I'm not built to have orgasms I don't think my lady bits work"

No one said anything, but they were all looking at me as if I was talking gibberish. I thought for a second I was really drunk and not making any sense but eventually I cracked,

"Ok enough with the silence, somebody say something for fucks sake" I said, I swear if I'd been standing up I'd have stamped my foot.

"Honey, we need to get you laid, soon, and by someone who knows what they are doing , because clearly those 3 chumps didn't have a clue" Rose said as she poured out yet more Tequila.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Thank you to AG who is again at the helm as my Beta, she is on double speed this time and we have 20 chapters already ready for you.

To my wonderful pre reader Edlovesme please send her loads of congratulations, her boy is getting married, she is going to be a mother in law.

Finally a fic review for you – please go look at Ladyletters, her new story - Watching her fall is amazing, please go and read and review.


	6. Deprivation chapter 6

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

EPOV

It was during one of my property explorations that I came across the club for the first time. I thought it was just your run of the mill sex club, you know full of fat sweaty men trying to get off with bored housewives, who husbands didn't even notice they weren't at home. I soon found out I couldn't have been more wrong.

Standing outside the near derelict building I was looking at I was speaking to a real estate agent and she was filling me in on the surrounding area and the businesses in the vicinity. She was trying to be objective, but the sneer in her voice gave her away as she told me about the sordid goings on inside the building just up the block from the one I was looking at. When I tried to push her she admitted she had never even been inside and didn't know anyone that was a member, but it didn't stop her having an opinion.

As soon as we were finished with our meeting I wandered over to the club to see if anyone was about, it was late afternoon so I wasn't very hopeful as I assumed these places kept quite late hours. I was surprised when the intercom on the front door was actually answered, and when I explained that I was looking at property nearby for a business opportunity and was looking to talk to local business owners about the area, I was even more surprised when the door opened. Stepping into a small lobby I waited for someone to come and find me. I heard a lock disengage and then the door was opened by a very tall well-dressed man, he introduced himself as Billy, and explained that along with his partner Sue he owned the club. He invited me in to the bar area and I took a seat on a large very comfortable sofa as he went off to find us a pot of coffee.

When he returned he was being followed by a very beautiful Native American woman, she introduced herself as Sue and after handshakes all-round, we sat and drank coffee and talked about the neighbourhood. They explained they had bought the building when it was in a poor state and had used a local architect to get it up to a standard the building inspectors had been happy with. Offering me the name of the practice I happily took the business card and the recommendation. I started to explain my plans for my club, explaining how it was a strict Gentlemen's club in the old fashion sense of the word, not today's idea of strippers and lap dancers. They were both interested when I explained about the gym and the spa suite and my strict no fraternization policy.

They started to tell me about the workings of their club, about the fetishes, swingers and basically anything goes scenes they catered for. I had never been inside anything like this place and couldn't resist asking for a tour, they could only say no right? Sue explained she had an appointment but that Billy was happy to show me around, so we set off and I can honestly say my eyes were well and truly opened. I saw things I'd never seen before and things I never even knew existed. I knew I was a well-educated man, but this was something different. Sure I'd watched my fair share of regular porn every man watched, you know threesomes, girl on girl, bad foreign porn you laughed at, but some of the stuff here was just way past anything I'd ever encountered.

After a good look round we make our way back down to the bar and Sue was once again sitting on the sofa. I went to say my goodbyes and to thank them for being so welcoming when she handed me a white envelope "This is an invitation to our next non-members evening, we have them every six months or so as a way of getting the 'curious' through the front door and hopefully onto our membership list" she explained "Please feel free to attend and bring friends if you think they would be interested".

I thanked them for the invite and left, once more going to look around the neighbourhood and at the building I was interested in.

The area was ok, it seemed safe, quite industrial, so no tourists and probably quieter in the evening. The bars and restaurants on the outskirts of the city were in the livelier residential neighbourhoods, well away from here. It was a perfect position for my second club, the opposite side of the city from my existing one and my patrons could come and go easily without any bother and in the evenings there was ample space for parking.

As I stood looking at the proximity to the 'sex club' I could see us sharing quite a few clients, I'm sure their fees were just as high as I intended mine to be because the men I wanted to attract could afford anything they needed or desired. As I walked back to where I'd left my car earlier in the day I decided to go ahead and purchase the building, subject to all the permits and surveys etc. I'd had a few problems with the architect I used on my first club, although I was happy with the end result, so maybe I could give the guy Billy recommended a go, and I'd need a good building crew from this side of the city. I would also need to talk to my regular contractors and see if they were prepared to travel or could make recommendations.

I was excited now I'd made my decision because this for me was what it was all about. I loved the thrill of a new start, getting everything ready to open because in reality my first club was now established and ran itself. I didn't need to be there all the time, I had a good Manager and to be honest I was getting bored just trying to look busy when I went in. True, my presence kept the staff on their toes but it certainly wasn't a full time job anymore. I could just launch another and as soon as that was established start all over again looking for new premises after hiring the right people to run it of course.

Later that evening as I sat on my balcony with a cold beer I remembered the invitation in my pocket. Opening the envelope I pulled out a very stylish thick white card that was embossed in silver. It invited me and guests to 'A Taster Evening', whatever that was, in a few weeks' time. I was sure Jasper would be up for it, he would go just to see if it was any competition to his business. Emmett I wasn't so sure. He still worried about being photographed and exposed on social media if he stepped out of line at all. I read through the other documents in the envelope and was pleased to see the rules did not allow personal cameras of any kind inside and that everyone who went in had to sign a NDA, that should at least calm down Emmett down.

It looked like we were going on a night out.

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Before you panic this is not going to be another 'That Night'. While I admit to using an idea from my last story it goes in another direction entirely so stay patient with me while the story unfolds.


	7. Deprivation chapter 7

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

 _ **Just a quick note to say thank you to whoever nominated me for the TwifanfictionRecs Top Ten Completed fics for October. I'm so freaking proud to have been nominated. That Night was my first attempted at writing and I loved the experience, every word. Please if you enjoyed it go and vote.**_

BPOV

My apartment the next morning was not a good place to be, six massively hung over women, all the dirty dishes and glasses from dinner and the big white elephant that was sitting in the middle of all of it after my revelations.

To give them credit they had not teased me or mocked me, they were true friends and their only concern was how I had coped without a good sex life all this time. I tried to explain the old saying that you couldn't miss what you've never had, but they weren't buying that. To listen to them I was beginning to wonder if my vag really was starting to shrivel up and that I would be technically a virgin again soon because I'd gone so long without an orgasm. No amount of explaining that I'd just had sex with James not that long ago could convince them I wasn't technically 'pure'.

It took most of the day and lots of coffee to get us all up and functioning. Bree loaded the dishwasher, Tanya straightened the living room and Kate sorted out the guest bathroom while I finally cooked us all brunch. We settled down with a great big pile of French toast, fruit and crispy bacon and chatted as we planned what to do with the rest of the day.

"Let's go shopping" Bree ever the bundle of energy, shouted out as we sat around.

"No chance" was the response, along with "too energetic,"too noisy" and "definitely not"

"Ok what do we want to do then?" she asked.

"Let's go for a walk, you know exercise and work off all the calories from last night" Irina suggested.

We all sort of hummed and made noises but it was obvious nobody really wanted to move so after much discussion we decided to spend the rest of the day watching DVDs. We started off with 'Water for Elephants' because everyone likes a bit of Mr P, then moved onto the Avengers because well the eye candy in that had something for everyone.

We snacked and drank soft drinks, each one of us feeling better as the hours passed. Finally by late afternoon we were all ready to do something else, and it was Rosalie who made that decision for us

"OK people. Operation 'get Bella laid properly' starts tonight. How about we all go home get spruced up and meet back here at 8.00pm? We can go out to one or two of the local bars, make a plan and look for potential victims, no sorry, partners for Bella"

Everyone started to cheer and high five, what the f…. was going on.

"Excuse me! Do we really need to do that tonight? I need to wax and sort myself out" I explained trying to put them off. I don't think pointing to my bikini line was actually needed to get my point across but I was not ready for all this attention at all.

"You don't need to do anything tonight Bella. We are not going to risk you getting another dud. No we need to get references and have someone vouch for whoever we pick for you, so don't worry. Right girls' thinking caps on, who do we know, between us that will blow off her socks, and who is available at the moment? Doesn't need to be a keeper, just a damn good fuck" Rosalie said to her merry band of cackling women as they collected their belongings and started to leave.

"See you back here at eight" was all I heard as I watched them leave.

I sat back down, fifteen minutes ago I'd been drooling over Thor and Captain America and now everyone was gone and I was sat here alone wondering what the hell happened.

As it got closer to the time I had to be ready I started to panic. Should I go for a glamorous look, or casual, where were we going, what sort of bars? I sat back on my bed and took a deep breath,

"what the hell are you worrying about, you're a grown women, with a successful career, your own home and good friends" I said aloud to myself as I looked in the mirror, I always found that I could talk myself into anything I just needed to focus . "Now get dressed in something you feel comfortable and beautiful in "I ordered myself.

Just before eight o'clock Bree arrived, dressed very similar to me in a silk blouse and a pair of very expensive jeans. They fit her extremely well to say she was so tiny, and made her look taller, also helping were the six inch heels she had on. I had also settled on a chocolate coloured silk shirt, the very same colour of my eyes, and a pair of jeans that I knew did wonders for my ass. I'd also got on heels, but nowhere near as high. Rosalie was the next to arrive, she had sprayed on a dress that looked like it was held together by fresh air and will power and her heels were just death traps. "Jeans, you two I thought we were going out scouting for talent"

"Rosalie I need to be comfortable or you know I'll fidget all night" I explained.

"I know, but you look gorgeous anyway, so let's go, we're meeting the others at a bar in town" she explained.

As we got in a cab downstairs Rosalie's phone started to go mad, it was continually beeping as she read whatever was on the screen and deleted the message and read the next.

"What are you doing?" Bree asked

"I've been putting some feelers out for who is single and available and who isn't, and I'm also looking for the soccer player, you know the one who gave me that amazing night, he would be ideal for Bella and I know he can deliver the goods." She explained.

"I'm not quite sure this is a good thing. Do we really need to be so clinical about this, I mean can't we just leave it to chance and see if any one takes my fancy enough for me to flirt with them?" I pleaded.

"No, absolutely not Bella! One more bad experience and you'll give up for good. We have got to get you laid properly so you see what it can be really like. This isn't about finding you a boyfriend, just an amazing fuck who knows what he is doing. Look please do not worry, leave all the planning and details to us. I promise you we'll find you the perfect man, someone who will show you just what it can be like. Once we have that sorted then my little protégé, we'll send you out into the world with the basic knowledge of how to weed out the duds."

Rosalie was on a roll so I sat back in the cab and got myself ready for the night ahead, who knows what it will bring.

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Your getting this update early because AG and I are off the Manchester for a few days, lots of drinking, shopping, spoiling ourselves, shopping and maybe some shopping.

To Edlovesme who made me so jealous this week when she sent me a photo of her and Captain America this chapter is for you, shame I couldn't work the hair washing in but I will.


	8. Deprivation chapter 8

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

EPOV

My plans were in full flow, I'd made an offer on the building and it had been accepted. I'd spoken to the architect Billy recommended and I had provisionally engaged him, so everything was on track. All I needed was a completion date on the property and I could really get started. I decided to stay with the same interior designer as she had done such a good job with the original décor in my other club. In fact I was going to go for an almost carbon copy of my original club as they were on totally different sides of Chicago. The new one was outside of the city altogether, tucked more into the industrial quarter in the suburbs. I was really looking forward to seeing what new technology was already available, what we could improve on and what we could upgrade, while still keeping the old charm my clients seem to feel so comfortable in.

I felt alive again, excited and full of life and energy, so different to how I had been feeling, it's amazing how quickly your mood lifts and changes when you actually feel as though your life is going In the right direction.

"You're looking smug there, what's got you grinning?" asked Emmett

"He's thinking about which one of these willing conquests he's going to push up against a wall somewhere and do filthy disgusting things to" Jasper laughed as he finished speaking.

"Shit there is a queue forming Edward, should I give them a ticket with a number on and you can just announce every time you're ready for the next one?"

Emmett was now rolling with laughter as we sat in a local sports bar. We had come into this neighbourhood because Jasper was looking at another bar he wanted to purchase. He'd had a nod that it was going on the market soon and we here doing some market research. Well that is what they told me when they dragged me out of my office tonight.

"We haven't seen you in over a week Edward, time to take a break and have some fun" Jasper had said as they entered my office and pulled me away from my plans. I followed them out to Emmett's horrendously large Jeep which for someone who supposedly wanted to stay out of the public eye and keep a low profile screamed "look at me". After fighting with the five point seat belt, I realised just how much I missed my Aston Martin and the sleek beautiful upholstery. That was just something else in my life that was put away and not used so it wasn't damaged or gave any indication of my actual wealth. Maybe this weekend I could take it for a spin?

The jeep pulled away from the curb with an horrendous squealing noise as Emmett left rubber all over the road, " So glad to see we're keeping a low profile" I taunted him as Jasper laughed and Emmett raised his middle finger at me. The journey took about 30 minutes, which as the traffic was light, pleased Jasper immensely. If he did go ahead and buy this place he felt it was close enough to keep an eye on, but far enough away that he wouldn't be potentially competing with himself for customers. We parked close by and walked up to the bar. My first impressions were that it was probably very trendy a few years back, but now it was starting to look dated. The outside was ready for a refurbishment, the paint was peeling a little and the dirty signage needed a good clean or maybe even replacing. The inside was just the same. It desperately needed some new lighting, totally redecorating and a thorough spring clean. I could see Jasper was appraising everything, just as I had. He would look at it objectively and within half an hour he would have made a decision one way or the other. Never mind what the books said, Jasper always went on his gut feel, I thought that was stupid, but he was adamant that he'd trusted it since he was a child and it had never let him down, plus he was a hard ass negotiator when it came to price.

"Holy Shit! Look at the amount of talent in here," Emmett said to no one in particular

"I'm going to go and mingle and see if everything is really as good as it looks" Emmett said as he threw his keys at me.

"I'll have a coke. I'm training tomorrow so no alcohol for me tonight. I'll catch up with you once I've had a recce around" he was already walking away as he finished telling us what to order for him.

Jasper and I pulled out two stools and sat at a high table by the bar. From here we could watch the footfall into and out of the place and we could see out into the street so Jasper could judge how many people were about and what the demographic was: students, young families, groups of twenty somethings, older people.

The waitress came over and we both ordered a bottle of beer and of course the coke for Emmett and a couple of baskets of wings. Jasper was adamant that you could tell what the food was like in a place just from the wings. If they could get them right, they could cook anything apparently. I'd pushed this thought aside before but now this got me thinking about my clubs; clubs, a smile crossed my lips as I thought about the fact is was plural now, or nearly anyway. At present we only offered some bar snacks, you know things like club sandwiches, wings, a decent cold sandwich or a burger but I was toying with the idea of putting in a complete restaurant this time. Somewhere that could be a neutral zone, so clients could bring guests, female or otherwise for dinner. This would also bring fresh blood into the club and encourage my existing clients to do business there, to bring business from outside of the city. I know my Gentleman's spa/club excluded 50% of the population, but I couldn't ignore that if they wanted to hold business meetings over dinner excluding women from the restaurant wouldn't be a palatable option. Sure there were some old dinosaurs that thought business should just be the jurisdiction of men but to be honest they were dying out. However, I had no plans to turn in the spa into a male and female zone because I was sure I had a captive audience, I offered a sanctuary from life, both business and personal, that was my business.

I was bought back into the present by the waitress slamming down the wings and the bottles of beer. Jasper was busy making notes on his IPad and whilst I could hear Emmett, I couldn't see him. I dug into the wings and was surprised; they were good, very good. They had just the right amount of spice to make you need another drink no matter how much you still had in front of you. I nudged Jasper and told him to dig in because once Emmett remembered we always ordered them, he would be back at the table to hoover them up.

"Emmm they're good" Jasper said as he licked his lips. "Another plus point for this place, my gut is telling me this bar with a little bit of TLC could be a little gold mine. I think I'll give the owner a call tomorrow and if it's true he's ready to sell up, I might try and get it before it comes on the market".

I understood this logic and thought process so I just nodded and took another swallow of my beer.

"Fuck me! Guess who is over there in the end booth?" Emmett said loud enough for the tables around us to all look across the bar in case it was someone they knew.

"I don't know Emmett, why don't you enlighten us?" Jasper said without flinching, like me he was used to both the volume and the style of Emmett.

"Well remember a while back I picked up that amazing blonde with the great rack and the legs to die for? You know the one that kept up with me all-night and was gone in the morning, well she is over there with her girlfriends and they have invited us to join them, so come on I'm not letting her get away again"

"No Emmett I'm not doing this anymore, I need a break from picking up random women, you go if you want, but I'll grab a cab and just go home" was my surprising response. In fact I'm not sure who was most surprised, him or me.

I looked at Jasper to see what he wanted to do and I could see he was wavering.

"No I'm with Edward, I have a long day tomorrow so I'll go as well, and I've seen everything I need to here".

"Ok you pussies there are six very fine women all sitting around having a whale of a night and you could be part of it, but no go and tuck yourselves into your cold beds and have a good long tug for me" he said as he caught the keys I threw at him.

We watched him walk away and up to the booth in the back corner of the bar, a couple of blondes got out so he could squeeze in and the laughter started almost immediately. I very nearly changed my mind, but I knew if I went back there, I would flirt with all of them until one showed the right signs and then that would be it, out in the alley or the restrooms, anonymous unfeeling sex. I shuddered; no I didn't want that any longer I told myself.

Jasper and I rode back to his bar, I dropped him off and carried on back to my apartment, the cab fare was extortionate, but as soon as my front door closed I was able to relax and congratulate myself for not giving in for another day.


	9. Deprivation Chapter 9

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the character

BPOV

The bar was better than I thought it was going to be, we managed to get a booth in the back corner, so we could all sit around and they could discuss what the plan of action was going to be. As the drink flowed the conversation got rowdier and the suggestions and examples of what could initiate a good orgasm started to be damn right rude. I really didn't need to sit here and listen to their individual stories and boasts of their amazing sex lives and experiences; a girl does have some pride. In fact it was having the opposite effect to the one they hoped for, I really was beginning to feel like such a failure. In the end it started to get too much and a few times I had to quieten the table down so we didn't annoy the other patrons and broadcast my predicament to everyone in the near vicinity.

I carefully pulled everyone's attention back to the present and told them to forget everything and that I was perfectly capable of finding my own lovers.

"Oh hell no!" Bree cried as she slammed her cocktail glass down on the table, "you have already proved on more than one occasion that you have lousy taste in men, so it's our turn to find you one. Think of it as a blind date with a guaranteed orgasm at the end" she chuckled.

"Do you think we should sign her up to loads of different dating websites and things like Tinder?" Tanya asked

"No takes too long to get everything organised and to weed out the perverts and the nerds" Rosalie answered "It needs to be someone we know or someone that comes with a known track record and recommendation. We have to guarantee Bella a good time." "For once we need a man whore who likes a challenge" she added as she continued typing on her phone. She'd spent so long on it I was beginning to question just how many men she knew.

Just as she was about to launch into sharing with us whatever was amusing her on her phone a guy approached the table. Now for me this was either very stupid, or very brave, I'm not quite sure which. We all have quite strong personalities, so to approach six of us in full flow especially as alcohol was in the mix, takes balls the size of grapefruits.

"Well hello there again beautiful, where did you disappear to? I've been trying to find you"

We all looked at each other to see who recognised him. I knew I didn't know him, but he looked slightly familiar so I presumed one of the others knew him, to be honest he could have been talking to any of them, It took about 30 seconds for Rose to finally speak up, surprise surprise

"You obviously didn't look very hard, I am about most of the time and I have even been back to the club several times so …."

"Well I'm here now and I'm going to make sure you don't get away again without me having some way of contacting you. Now don't move and I'll just let my guys know where I am. That's if I can join you ladies?"

The girls let out a great cheer and the guy walked away from the table.

"Ok Rosalie, spill and quickly" Tanya was the first one to speak

"You remember I told you about that soccer player, you know the one I had the amazing night with? Well that's him, his name is Emmett, I think he plays for one of the local pro teams." Rosalie explained

"I knew I knew his face, yes he plays for the Fire" Irina said high fiving Bree and Tanya.

It was only a matter of minutes before he was back, a couple of the girls got up to make room so he could slide in beside Rosalie and in amongst the middle of the group.

"My boys were tired so they have gone home, they have big business to do apparently tomorrow. What pussies they are, so ladies I'm all yours, what are you going to do with me?" he said as he attracted the waitresses attention and ordered another round for us and a coke for himself.

"Well now we have you here I think we need to pick your brain" Rosalie said, she had that smile on her face that always gets us into trouble or thrown out of somewhere. I watched as her hand moved onto his thigh and started to stroke upwards. I was just the right side of drunk so I had no qualms about watching her; she was in full bitch mode, but full on flirt mode at the same time.

"We need to get Bella here laid, quickly and properly, and by properly I mean multiple orgasms, can't walk the next day sort of sex, do you know anyone who could be of service, and up for the job?"

Emmett looked at her as if she'd spoken in some foreign language, then he looked around the group trying to work out which one of us was Bella. Well that's what I presumed he was doing as I raised my hand and gave him a little wave.

"Hi, I'm Bella, apparently desperately in need of some mind blowing sex"

He let out a huge guffaw that the whole bar heard, some of them craned their necks to try and see where the noise was coming from, mostly unsuccessfully though as he was tucked away in the booth surrounded by the girls.

"Well aren't you a cutie? Bella I promise you that I will make it my top priority to get you what you need as soon as I have managed to get Blondie's phone number and a promise that she will go out to dinner with me "

We all looked at Rosalie, now normally she would play hard to get, she was an expert at disappearing the next morning if she didn't want to see the guy again or tormenting them if she did. To our surprise though she took his phone off him and put her number in. We all waited to make sure her phone rang, that she had given him the correct number and when it did we cheered.

"This is just for you Bella, I'm only going to dinner with him so we can set you up and get you laid" she tried to tell us, but I could see her hand was already working its way far too close to his ' meat and two veg' than I was comfortable with.

As the night went on Emmett told us stories about his team mates and his family. He had a sister our age called Alice and they were obviously very close, once or twice he mentioned his best friends who had been in the bar earlier with him, but mostly he spent the night with his lips firmly attached to Rosalie in some way. The drinks flowed and for the second night running we were all very drunk, thank goodness tomorrow was Sunday and we could all sleep in a little.

When I finally woke the next morning, it was because of the alarm on my phone that I didn't remember setting. Apparently looking at my text messages, we had arranged to meet for brunch at our favourite café and I didn't have long to get ready. It must have been a good night because I really didn't remember getting home. The state of my apartment this morning points to me getting undressed as I walked to my bedroom. My bra was on the sofa, my footwear in the hallway and I still hadn't found my panties. It took a huge effort just too actually get up and shower never mind leave my bed.

As I walked into 'Junction 28' the girls were already there, along with Emmett and another girl I didn't recognise,

"Finally you're here! I'm starving! Let's eat and I need coffee, were just some of the greetings that met me as I sat in the only empty chair.

"Bella this is Alice, Emmett's sister" Rosalie said as she once again took charge, "now everyone is here we can get started"

"What, what have I missed, what are we doing?" I asked bewildered as everyone seemed to be on-board with what was happening.

"Bella, "Operation Get Bella Laid properly" is now officially open for nominations" said Rosalie with a large smile on her face.

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AG and I had a wonderful trip, she is a demon shopper and a terrible influence, we spent far too much money and drank cocktails and fizz and managed to catch a Bobby L gig. What more could a girl ask for ?


	10. Deprivation chapter 10

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

EPOV

It was laundry day meaning my housekeeper would be in to take my suits and shirts to the cleaners, so I was busy emptying and checking all my pockets. I had a terrible habit of never throwing anything away so I was amazed at what I usually found. Among all the ticket stubs, pens and small change I came across the invitation again. I hadn't given it much thought since that night really, I had presumed the guys would want to go, seeing as it was somewhere neither had ever been invited before, but I had forgotten to mention it. Looking at the date it was this coming weekend, I quickly RSVP'd anyway and set a reminder to speak to the guys when we met up later.

I was mildly curious, I had done what little bit of research I could on the sex club, it was apparently just named 'DESIRE' nothing else. I thought it was a bit corny, but who was I to judge, my club didn't even have a name, the plaque on the door just had the street name and number on it. I thought this gave it an air of mystery, but it had just caused havoc when I had had to register the club and set up bank accounts and other formalities. Try explaining to someone that the business doesn't have a name as such, just an address.

DESIRE's website wasn't very informative, it was more suggestive, and a good marketing ploy I thought. Apart from my little tour that day of the empty rooms I had no real idea what actually went off in there, but I could imagine, whether my imagination was correct would need to be seen. I was looking forward to having a good look round, to seeing who the clientele where, what the demographic was like and more importantly what the price of subscriptions were. I knew that there was a chance I could share some of their clients so I needed to try and get a feel for how much people were spending on this side of the city. I didn't think it would be that different as most of my existing clients were wealthy enough not to have to worry, but it's always a concern starting afresh in a new area. I wasn't stupid, I know fashions change, I also know that clubs like mine are built on reputation and personal reference, business deals happen every day in my bar, sauna and steam room, just like on the golf course, and for the big business men if you are not there then you are not part of the group.

This was another reason I was thinking about a restaurant and maybe a business centre in the new club. I had to find a way of allowing women in so business could be discussed. I'm not a misogynist, I know that to widen the circle of members I need to let my members bring business colleagues in for meetings and that half of these at least had to be women. So a separate area where meetings could be held, away from the everyday members and 'never the twain shall meet' could potentially keep everyone happy. I made a note to speak to my new architect Carlisle and went back to staring at the invitation.

Later that night Jasper and I got together for dinner, Emmett was off doing something or somebody he was being very vague about. I hadn't seen him since the night in the bar when we had left him with the group of very loud, very drunk women.

"What's happening with Emmett, I've hardly spoken to him this week?" I asked Jasper

He burst out laughing, nearly spraying me with beer "Oh he's got his hands full, let's just say I think he may just have met his match"

"What do you mean?"

"You'll see later, he is coming to meet us, he should be here in about half an hour" Jasper responded cryptically.

I tucked into my steak and asked Jasper about the fish dish that had just been put in front of him. We were in a fashionable restaurant in town and I was trying the food because I had heard great things about the chef and had spoken to him a couple of times. Plan was for Jasper and I to head hunt him, we had decided that we could offer him a joint venture and if he was interested, he could set up my new restaurant, and make as much fancy food as he wanted, as well as having over all control of the bar food. Plan was for something similar at Jasper's club and his new bar. That way we could afford the ridiculous salary he was demanding, advertise that we had him and help him satisfy the creative outlet he kept telling me he needed, whatever that meant.

We were just demolishing an excellent cheese board when Emmett came bounding into the restaurant to join us. He sat in the spare chair we had arranged for him and let out a huge sigh.

"Fuck I'm knackered! If I don't get a rest soon I think I may just have to retire out injured for a week or two", he said as he poured himself a glass of water and helped himself to a huge piece of a very strange English cheese .

"What the fuck is that?", he said as he picked up his napkin and spat the cheese into it.

"That my good man is an imported English cheese called "Stinking Bishop" I said in my best, if not very good English accent.

"Well they can keep it. What's wrong with cheese that comes in a squeezy bottle?" he said wiping his tongue on the napkin again.

"Why are you so tired, is training more strenuous than usual?" I asked quite innocently.

Jasper once again laughed out loud and at this point between the two of them I was sure we were going to be asked to leave.

"Training is a breeze as ever no I'm talking about Rosie. The woman is insatiable and I'm struggling to keep up with her. I'm getting about two hours sleep every night, then between her and training I'm just not getting any down time. In fact Ed I think I'm going to come and hide at your club tomorrow night, she won't be able to get me there."

"Emmett if she is becoming a nuisance you really need to get rid and get a restraining order if she is too much" was my response. I was well aware how clingy some women could get, hence my well tested route of anonymous sex.

"Why the fuck would I do that? The women is amazing, in fact if she can keep this pace up I might just marry her and give up the soccer training instead. I will probably die from being shagged to death" he said in a very bad attempt, even worse than mine, at another British accent.

Jasper was now rolling about in his chair, he was laughing so hard, I quickly called for the bill and herded us out of the restaurant, there were plenty of good chefs around, we could look for another if we needed to.

We settled in the bar across the road, we could talk in here without having to worry about Emmett, so as soon as we sat down, we ordered beers all round and I turned to him "ok explain, what is going on?"

With that Emmett told us everything, most of which I really didn't want to know. I was now far too informed on positions, number of times and what she could do with her fingers in places where I didn't want anybody but my doctor going. Emmett though was absolutely enthralled, his face was alive as he spoke about her and I could see that he was on the edge of falling for her. I was happy for him, he was a great guy and I wanted him to be happy.

As he finally slowed down I asked how he had met her,

"Don't you remember that night we went to stake out Jasper's new bar? I told you the place was full of lovely ladies, and I recognised her instantly, she was the one that got away a while back, she was in there with her friends on a girlie night out. You two pussies went home early, well I stayed and partied with the ladies, and damn could they party, but anyway I'm helping them out with a little erm…. Problem one of them has, I'm looking for volunteers. Would either of you be available to help out?"

I wasn't falling for that, "No whatever it is, I'm not getting involved. You always get roped into some scheme or another and we always end up either in trouble, a cell or out of pocket so No No,No!"

"Oh don't worry this won't cost you a cent, it's not money she's after".

"I'm intrigued Em, what have you got yourself involved with now?" Jasper asked, obviously curious. Had he not learnt his lesson? The last time we went to help Emmett out we ended up nearly getting arrested.

"Before we get in to this, and you get talked into doing something you will regret later, I want to talk to you about this weekend. I have an invitation to a club near my new premises, I don't know if you have heard of it but it's called 'DESIRE'."

"What the fuck are you doing with an invitation for there? Do you know what sort of club it is?" Emmett asked, his eyes were almost out on stalks and his face had gone very red.

"Yes I know now what sort of club it is now, I had a short tour around it a few weeks back, I was over there looking at the businesses in the area and as it was the only other club of sorts I went and introduced myself, but more to the point how do you know about it?"

"Half the team have memberships there, they can go and do whatever they want without any possibility out being exposed in the press, the club has a very strict NDA and they enforce it to the full." Emmett explained.

"Well do you both want to come Saturday Night? I have an invite for us, they are having a taster evening to try and drum up new members, I was thinking we could go so I could see what sort of people their members are, I'm thinking some of their members will eventually become mine as well" I explained

"Oh right so this is purely a research visit, nothing to do with your need to find another way to indulge your anonymous sex kink?" Jasper remarked with that fast becoming annoying smirk on his face.

"Fuck off Jasper, of course not, this is a research visit only, now are we going or what?" I asked.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Before any of you ask Stinking Bishop is a real cheese, it has a very unique taste and is not to everyone's taste. Think English Stilton only stronger.


	11. Deprivation Chapter 11

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 11

BPOV

That morning we had a whale of a time. Alice was just as much fun as Emmett and she blended in to our group really easily, I could see her becoming a permanent fixture no matter what happened to Rosalie and Emmett. It didn't take me long to realise that he had gone home with her last night and I deduced from the bag that was by his feet, Alice had brought him a change of clothes. Rosalie was again sitting so close to him I'm sure you wouldn't have been able to get a feather between them. It was strange to watch really. Rosalie generally had the same attitude to sex that a lot of guys seemed to. She had no qualms about taking one home, screwing his brains out and then showing him the door, she saw sex as a form of stress relief, and she used it when she needed to.

As we all ordered and a huge array of breakfast food, coffee and juice arrived the conversation hit a lull and two nights of alcohol was finally soaked up. It always makes me laugh that people think all women only eat lettuce leaves and egg white omelettes, the table was full of all manner of food and we all ate just as much as Emmett. At one point I think even he was shocked, he looked round had a chuckle to himself and tucked into his overflowing plate.

"I thought I could eat ladies, but you lot make me proud, it's so nice to see you all eating proper food and not nibbling on a dry piece of toast"

This caused lots of laughter and conversation picked up again with tales of gym visits and spandex, totally blowing the myth we could all eat like this everyday.

"Now down to business" Rosie said as she tapped her fork against her glass.

"Let's have a look at the list of nominations please" she said as she got out her iPad and started to type frantically.

"Ok the nominations so far are, Edward, Jasper, Paul and Garrett, as nominated by Emmett, he says he can vouch for all of them except he has worries about Edward. We also have Mike, Tyler, Eric, Jared, Andrew, Neil, Riley and Laurent. I've already discounted James as we know he isn't up to the job. We need to start weeding out the maybes and start on the 'definitely will blow her socks off' so we can get this operation moving as quickly as possible."

"Well I do have my doubts about Edward. He's a great guy but is a special case because he seems to have a very different attitude to sex than the rest of us, so let's count him out for the minute" Emmet explained.

"You need to count out Jasper as well" Alice said

"Why?" Emmett asked looking at his sister

"Well he was telling me the last time I spoke to him he had met someone and was off the market" Alice explained. Her demeanour was very shifty and as she looked at the floor it was obvious to see she had gone bright red.

"He never said anything to me and I was with him last night, wait till I see the fucker!" Emmett said loudly as he stood up and pushed away from the table. He excused himself and as soon as he was out of earshot the questions began.

"So Alice, how long have you been seeing Jasper on the quiet then?" Irina asked what we were all thinking.

"I, I...oh what the hell, for about six months now, but we aren't ready to tell Emmett yet. I'm sorry to put you all in this position but Jasper is really not available, and I don't want you to waste your time"

"That's ok, so Jasper and Edward off the list can we move on now?" Rosalie said as Emmett came back from the restroom.

"Right so we need to decide between the rest of them, does anyone have a favourite that they think would really do the job?" Rosalie asked.

After another round of coffees and some heated banter it was decided that Emmett would approach his teammate Garrett and set him up on a blind date with me. Emmett was absolutely positive that Garrett was the man for the job, apparently he had a voracious appetite for sex and boasted often in the changing room about how good he was. I was a little unsure about this, in my mind anyone who boasted and talked about it all the time, was probably over compensating for something but we'd see.

It was quite depressing in some ways listening to them discuss me as though I was a problem that needed fixing, but they had my best interests at heart and I knew that. I just wished it wasn't necessary. I loved the idea of sex, I so wanted to get lost in someone else, to unleash unfound passions and to satisfy them and myself, but I honestly don't think it's possible for me. I don't doubt that I will meet and probably fall in love with someone at some point, but so long as I can satisfy them sexually I really didn't expect much back.

We left the café well after lunch, I'm sure the owners were glad to see the back of us, but we had spent a fair bit in there as brunch was followed by more coffee and cakes and a lot more laughter. Rosalie said goodbye to Emmett as he went off to the gym at the stadium and the girls dispersed to do what they needed to before the working week started again.

That left Rosalie, Bree, Alice and I. We were trying to decide what to do when Bree's phone rang, it was the hospital who needed her to come in to cover as a couple of midwives had phoned in with a sickness bug. She said her goodbyes and the three of us decided to go back to mine. We watched a movie and then the others left. I did some laundry, got my clothes ready for work and made up a packed lunch. I knew I had a heavy workload day and probably wouldn't get chance to go out to pick lunch up.

After a relaxing bath I started thinking about my blind date. If I was going to do this I needed to throw myself into it whole heartedly, no inhibitions, no guilt and no limits. If he was half as good as Emmett was convinced he was he should be able to put my fears to bed once and for all. So long as I had one seriously good orgasm with him I would be happy. With this in mind I made a note on my phone to make an appointment at the spa and I started to mentally go through my wardrobe.

For my blind date I needed to wear something sexy and suggestive, a Rosalie outfit if you will. In fact I might as well just ask her to get me something because I could trust her to dress me. I sent her a text explaining what I needed her to do and then retired to bed.

I needed a good session with PETE, I could only hope that I would manage at least one small weak orgasm, but I really doubted it, frustration here I come, or not….


	12. Deprivation Chapter 12

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

The timeframe has skipped a head a little for this chapter. This takes place the weekend after the last chapter.

EPOV

Well it turns out I'm going to the taster evening on my own. Emmett doesn't want to go because he doesn't want to bump into anyone from the team apparently and Jasper has a date he says. I don't know which is more unbelievable. I can't believe Emmett is passing up a chance to see inside the club and perhaps seeing a teammate in a compromising position and as for Jasper dating, yeah right, about as much chance as me dating. Well fuck them both I'm going, and now I'll be on my own, not just for research purposes, I'm curious just as any normal person would be.

It took me ages to decide what to wear, I know what a pussy, but I wasn't sure if there was any sort of dress code I should adhere to. Usually I was confident enough to just throw on one of my understated but tailor made suits, I mean what is the point of buying designer when I have access to my own Saville Row tailor? Tonight was different though, I needed to look like I could afford to be there, but I didn't want to draw any unnecessary attention, the last thing I needed was anybody getting clingy or over familiar.

I had a long shower and made sure that I was well trimmed and neat and tidy, just in case, and then had a good long tug to get rid of any lingering sexual tension. It had been a while since that last tryst in the alleyway and I was beginning to feel a build-up. I mean usually I had a constant supply of willing partners so I never went without sex for long, but it just wasn't the same anymore and I wasn't sure what would change that. Drying off I made sure to trim my stubble back to its shortest length so it was scratchy, women seem to love that, and I towel dried my unruly hair, that was a lost cause so I just tried to straighten some of it out and just left the rest. I selected a black Dior suit I kept for formal occasions, meetings with the accountant, bank manager etc a white dress shirt and a thin black tie. I looked hot . I knew that, but I wasn't a vain son of a bitch, just honest. I didn't spend hours having treatments and continually looking in the mirror like some of Emmett's teammates, I was just me. I did look after myself though and exercised regularly.

I took a cab to the club thinking I might need a drink and after making sure I had my invitation, I took a deep breath as the car pulled up to the door and I leaned over to pay the driver. As I handed over my money he looked past me and nodding at the doorway asked" I have to ask, are you going in there?" pointing to the illuminated door.

"Yes" was all I said because I wasn't sure where this conversation was going.

"You lucky fucker" was his answer as he shook his head, "Do you want to book a return journey?" But before I could answer he shook his head again "How can you, you will have no idea what time you will be out of there will you? I'll give you my card instead so you can call when you are done" He took my money, muttering under his breath and after a final grin he drove off leaving me standing there.

I walked up to the door and as soon as I stepped on the large welcome mat the door opened to reveal a very beautiful older lady, she was stunning and reminded me of Tyra Banks and I couldn't stop looking at her. She had the most flawless skin and bone structure I had ever seen.

"Good Evening my name is Renee and I am you host for the evening. Do you have your invitation please?" she asked.

I rummaged in my pocket and brought out the invite, she quickly looked it over and scanned the bar code on the back, I heard a beep and she looked up from her smartphone with a smile

"Welcome to our club Mr Cullen, you have been issued with a temporary full membership just for tonight. That means as our guest you have access to every level in the club unlike the other non- members who will only have access to the tour and the public areas. To make sure the house staff can identify you I need you to wear this wristband please. Tonight only you and nine others have these privileges".

She took hold of my right hand and very gently stroked my palm as she attached the wristband. I was captivated by her touch and I could feel my dick twitching. If she kept stroking my hand I was definitely going to be in trouble. Thank fuck I had put on tight boxers to try and keep everything in place.

The wristband had no writing on it, it was just made of a deep red material that was locked in place with a silver catch.

"Please return this to whoever is on the door before you leave so we can remove it. Please do not leave the premises with it still on as you won't be able to remove it without damaging it and we wouldn't want that would we?" she almost purred.

I couldn't believe the effect she was having on me, I had never even looked at an older woman, and looking at her I would have to guess at a very well preserved forty year old. I smiled at her and agreed, and with that she turned and pushed a button on the wall and the inner door opened. "I will see you inside Mr Cullen, have a good evening and make sure to sample as many of our services as you can"

With that she released me from her spell and I walked into the huge reception and bar area. It looked so different in the dark, there was very low lighting and this was complimented with what seemed like hundreds of candles in storm lanterns all around the bar. My first thought was what a waste of man hours having to light them and then blow them out, but the gentle light was very soothing, almost calming and definitely sexy. I had never bought in to the whole candlelight seduction scheme but this was definitely effective. I got my bearings from last time I was here and made my way to the bar in the corner. It was very small I didn't realise understand how that would be functional until the barman informed me that it was table service only and to please take a seat. I asked him if I could sit at the bar, he was obviously trying to decide how to politely tell me no when he spotted my wristband.

"Certainly sir, let me find you something to sit on". He disappeared off to re-emerge less than a minute later with a tall bar stool.

I took my seat and ordered a Grey Goose, if I was going to get through this evening in one piece I was going to need just a little alcohol in my blood. I promised myself I would only have a couple, I really needed to keep my wits about me. I sat at the bar for about 30 minutes, the barman was too busy to chat and to be honest I really don't think he was allowed to. I got the feeling that he was on edge and I could only surmise it was because there were so many non-members in. The place was heaving, as I sat looking at the crowd in the bar I was having a ball people watching, there were so many nervous, excited, horny people all trying to keep their feelings and hormones in check that you could almost smell the sex in the air. It was a heady feeling.

At 10.00pm Sue came in to the bar area and clapped her hands,

"Ladies and Gentlemen, could I have your attention please?" she said as she waited for the chatter to die down. "Welcome to Desire. My name is Sue and I am one of the owners of this beautiful and magical club. Now before I take you through into the parts I know you are all really hear to see, can I please remind you that no camera are permitted at any time, and that includes camera phones. Can I please ask now that you switch off any devices and remind you that you have all signed an NDA. Privacy is very important to everyone here and we will leave no stone unturned if we have a leak of any sort, so please be warned. Now those rules aside once you go through these doors all you have to do is remember the manners your Moms' tried to teach you all those years ago. Always ask, say please and thank you and remember in here NO definitely means NO and other than that you should be good to go."

As everyone stood to follow her she said one last thing

"Anybody who has a red wristband on please wait here, Billy will be down to escort you shortly".

With that I sat back down, looking around to see who else had, remembering that Renee had said there were 10 VIP guests tonight. The room cleared pretty quickly until there were five of us left in the bar. I recognised a couple of Emmett's teammates, before long they would be able to have the team meeting here from what he said. The guy in the corner looked familiar and when he turned to look at the ceiling I realised it was the architect I'd been talking to about remodelling my new property. He'd obviously got an invite as well, which made sense as Billy spoke very highly of him. The blonde with him looked nervous and out of place and I'd have guessed it was his wife because a mistress or girlfriend would probably have been more interested in the surroundings, this women was almost territorial looking at the way she was gripping his arm.

Billy came into the bar and after welcoming a few of us by our first names he turned to one of Emmett's team mates who Billy had called Garrett and asked where Izzy was. He said she had gone to the restroom and would be out shortly so Billy continued with his explanation of what was going to happen.

Whilst the first group would be given a whistle stop tour of the facilities we would be given a more in depth look. He asked us to stay together and once he had showed us all the necessities like fire exits, restrooms, showers, first aid stations and how to attract the attention of a staff member he would take us round the different areas of the club. We were still missing the illusive Izzy and I was guessing she had done a runner on him, so when Billy suggested we get on with the tour and Renee would wait for Izzy and bring her and Garrett to us when she was ready. Everyone seemed happy with that so off we went into the inner workings of DESIRE.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

So Bella has a date with Garrett and Edward is at the club alone. So who then is Izzy ?


	13. Deprivation Chapter 13

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

 _ **Surprise, I'm posting an extra chapter to say thank you to all of you who have reviewed for me, we are very close to 100 reviews and I'm really thrilled. This chapter covers Bella's date so I hope you enjoy.**_

BPOV

Well tonight was the night, hopefully. I'd had the full spa treatment this week, not that I really needed It, I always kept myself neat, but if this evening was going to end where I wanted it to I didn't want to be worrying about prickly leg hair instead of having a roaring orgasm. You know I really need to lower my expectations because this could be such a disaster. We may have no chemistry, his breath might smell, he might have nose hair or yuck yuck yuck he might bite his finger nails, or even worse his toe nails. That thought made me shudder and retch a little before I calmed down, I had another shot of Grey Goose and put on another layer of powder to make sure I wasn't shiny from the one,two,three oh shit this isn't a good start, four shots I had just getting ready. I dashed to the kitchen a popped a pod into the coffee machine and grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge. Ten minutes later my bladder was screaming and I had to try and wriggle around in the dress Rosalie had purchased for me.

Ahh the dress, well that was a piece of artwork itself, not. It was in fact a piece of dark blue silk that wrapped around my middle and then went up over one shoulder and somehow met itself coming back and fastened with a buckle on the opposite hip to the covered shoulder. It just covered my ass and one boob, the other was in danger of making an appearance at any point until I found the tit tape she had left for me. I taped it as much as I could, but I couldn't wear a bra but I did manage, just, my tiniest thong. Rosalie had left strict instruction not to wear any panties but as soon as I realised if I had to sit low on a sofa or climb in and out of a low car, everyone in the vicinity was getting a free show, I popped on the thong. I wasn't a jewellery girl so one chunky silver bracelet on the completely bare arm along with a silver purse and some silver strappy sandals and I was ready to go.

Rosalie and I had agreed that we would go out in a foursome to start the night off, then if I was happy they would leave us to it and we could finish the night off as planned. So when the door buzzer went I knew they were here to pick me up. I really needed to take a coat but if I was going to go to a restaurant then back here well I could manage that so I left a few lamps on, checked my bedroom was spotless and set off downstairs.

Emmett was waiting for me at the door and he let out a low whistle as I walked towards him, "Wow Bella you look amazing, fuck! You're much too good for Garrett" he said as he opened the door of the limo that was parked outside. Thanking my lucky stars that I had put the thong on, I climbed in and made myself comfortable on the side sofa.

"This is a bit over the top isn't it?" I asked as Emmett got in next to me.

"Club limo sweetheart, as there are two of us we can share it tonight, so we can go and pick up Garrett now" he said pushing a button on the counter. The car slowly took off and I settled back,

"So Bella you put panties on, I told you not to" Rosalie said

"Well good evening to you my friend. You look lovely by the way and of course I put panties on, what you wanted a peek when I climbed in the limo?"

Emmett was quick with his response "I wouldn't have minded Bella, in fact as I said, you look far too good for Garrett, why don't we leave him out of it tonight and I'll take you both out instead? I'm sure my Rosie won't mind sharing me for one night, because let's be honest she knows I can guarantee to rock your world a few times quite easily"

The grin on his face was so adorable all I could do was laugh, Rosalie was also laughing and I think we hurt his feeling just a little bit. Just as the car started to slow down I leant forward and kissed him full on the lips saying, "Sorry big boy I don't share, do you?" and with that I leant back and kissed Rosalie with a full on lip lock. Now to say I'd never done anything like that before she reacted perfectly, she responded to my kiss with a low moan and put her hands up to place them carefully on my face, hiding the fact that neither of us actually opened our mouths and made it look as though we were both really into it. I heard the car door slam and a voice say

"Oh shit! What a way to start the night".

I pulled back to see that a guy I presumed was Garrett had joined us. He looked about 6'3 and was as broad as Emmett. He was dark haired, clean shaven and classically handsome. He had a bit of a tan, a sure sign that he spent time looking after himself, so hopefully no bad odours or stray hairs.

Emmett was just staring at us, his eyes going from me to Rosalie and back again, his mouth was open and he was dribbling. I leant forward and offered my hand to Garrett, "Hi I'm Izzy and this is Rosalie, and you know the dumbstruck fool there in the corner". He had a good firm handshake, I liked that in a man. I found at work that a lot of men have very limp handshakes and usually they are the people I really struggle to work well with.

"Hi I'm Garrett" he said before he thumped Emmett on the back.

Rosalie and I set about fixing our lip gloss and hair as Garrett was obviously trying to get Emmett to explain to him what had just happened before he got in the limo. Emmett however was not having it and was still looking at both of us strangely. We pulled up outside a very trendy restaurant and as the valet opened the door and offered his hand I was once again very glad I had gone with underwear and the tit tape.

The meal was ….good I suppose. I couldn't quite see what all the fuss was about this chef, his food was supposedly some fusion cuisine that had never been tried before, and if my lamb with warm ice cream was anything to go by well…..it was interesting. We all got on well, finally putting Emmett out of his misery by explaining that we were just winding him up, not that he believed us but I think that was more just wishful thinking on his part. Rosalie and Emmett also picked up on my introduction to Garrett and called me Izzy all night rather than Bella. I'm not quite sure why I had done that, I just wanted to be someone else tonight I suppose. If I was going to have sex with a virtual stranger I wanted to do it as Izzy not Bella.

As the meal came to an end Rosalie dragged me off to the restroom, I knew what she wanted so I was ready for the questions.

"So are you happy for us to leave you two?" she asked

"Yes I think so, do you know if he has anything planned or is he expecting to just go back to my apartment and get down to business?" I wanted to be ready so I would know what to expect.

"Oh Emmett hasn't told him about your little problem, he didn't want to put him under any pressure, he just thinks this is an ordinary blind date, so if you want him, just make a move" Rosalie explained.

We left the restroom and went back to the table, Emmett and Garrett had settled the bill so we started to leave the restaurant. Just as I was wondering what would happen next Garrett finally spoke up "Err... Izzy I have a VIP invite to a really exclusive club that I don't think has been open very long, are you game for something a little different?" he asked.

I looked at Emmett, but he wouldn't look me in the eye, so I knew there was something not quite right, I looked at Rosalie and raised an eyebrow but just she shrugged and looked at Emmett. Ok so they were not going to be any help. Sure, why not, if I was going to experience something a little different tonight was the night to do it, right? I quickly kissed Rosalie, on the cheek this time, and whispered that she had to call me in two hours to make sure I was ok. She nodded, letting me know she understood and I got into a cab with Garrett.

The cab ride took us into an area I hadn't been before and to be honest I had no idea where we were. The area seemed to be industrial and I had a feeling we were going to one of those trendy new clubs that were in old buildings, you know all chrome and glass but nowhere to sit down and relax. We stopped outside an illuminated door, there was no name on the door so I had no idea what I was walking into. Looking back I should have realised, but well…..

The door was opened as soon as we stepped on the carpet. An older, striking looking woman answered the door and she was far more interested in Garrett than she was me. To be honest something about her didn't ring true, I couldn't put my finger on it but something was just off. She asked for the invitation and after scanning it she put wristbands on both of our right arms. She led us towards the bar but before I was ready to go in I asked for the restroom, so she opened the inner doors and sent Garrett in while she led me through a separate door and into a luxurious suite. I managed to get a glimpse of the bar area, it was absolutely packed, I hoped that he'd manage to get a table because these sandals were starting to pinch and I really didn't fancy standing all night. I looked around and seeing as it was 10.00pm I decided I had plenty of time to decide if I wanted to take him home with me so I sat at the beautiful dressing table and took 10 minutes to check and reapply my make-up, fluffed my hair and made sure that my tape was still in place. I contemplated taking off my panties but I decided not to, no matter what happened tonight I wasn't quite ready for that in such a short dress.

I was finally ready to go back in so I made a move to open the door and the lady from the door was waiting for me "Sorry I didn't realise you were waiting for me, I've just been having a minute and a freshen up"

"It's fine honey, don't worry. I didn't want you to come out and wonder where everyone had gone"

I didn't understand what she meant until we walked into the now empty bar, apart from poor Garrett sitting there all on his own playing on his phone.

"Where did everyone go? I've only been 10 minutes " I asked

"You've been gone 20 minutes actually and we have missed the show round especially for VIP guests" Garrett spat out.

I looked at him and was about to apologise but before I could the lady spoke up for me.

"Who do you think you're talking to young man? That is no way to speak to your partner, now you know the rules here but for this beautiful lady's sake I will reiterate them. "

Turning to me she took hold of my hand and stroked my palm. "Now dear, I'm not sure if you heard earlier but I'm Renee and I'm your host for the evening so welcome to DESIRE. This is a special club where anything goes as long as you remember the rules. No photographs and remember you have signed an NDA. All that we ask is that when you go through these doors remember your manners, ask politely, say please and thank you and remember that NO definitely means NO."

"That is all perfectly clear but I have two questions, what NDA and what sort of club is this?" I said

I'm not sure which question caused Renee the most trouble but as she swallowed hard and went a very pale colour I realised why she had said she was our host for the evening. I pushed it to the back of my mind and looked at her for answers to my questions.

She turned and walked away leaving both Garrett and I standing in the empty bar, I wasn't sure where she'd gone until she reappeared with a sheaf of papers in her hands. She passed them to us saying

"Before you go through the doors I need you to sign these Non-Disclosure Agreements. You are not allowed to discuss anything you see tonight with anyone outside of these walls. If you do decide to become members, then you have to understand that we take people's privacy extremely seriously here."

Garrett quickly signed his but I took a minute carefully looking over the wording. I could speed read and believe me in my job I have signed hundreds of these things. It was standard so I signed it and handed it back along with the very nice fountain pen she had loaned us.

"You still haven't answered my question Renee, what sort of club is this?"

Renee looked me straight in the eye and answered "It is a place where you can fulfil your wildest dreams and fantasies, but Izzy, may I call you Izzy….. " I nodded for her to continue,

"Basically it is a very upmarket, very expensive sex club."


	14. Deprivation Chapter 14

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

 _ **Thank you so much for taking us over 100 reviews, I'm honoured and extremely happy you r enjoying my story. A big thank you to Rita01tx who has reviewed me on her Random Rita Friday Feature Fic. Thank you Thank you Thank you xx**_

EPOV

I was pleasantly surprised. I'm not quite sure what I was expecting, but the club seemed to be well run, it was beautifully styled and designed and every different room they took us into was clean, very well stocked and the layout given a great deal of thought. Even though there was activity in all the rooms, it was your normal run of the mill stuff. Lots of BDSM, group sex and swinging, nothing that made me think I would want to be a member here. If I was honest I could get most of what was on offer on any good night in one of Jasper's places. I was ready for another drink so as soon as Billy stopped talking long enough for me to get his attention I told him I was going back to the bar.

"Do you think you could find it?" he asked. I nodded, not really having any idea where I was going; the place wasn't that big so I was sure I could get back, I traced my steps back along the corridor we had just come down and recognised a few of the rooms we had already passed. I kept glancing into the open doorways; it was amazing how quickly you just used to seeing a hairy ass going up and down and in and out.

I made my way in the general direction of the bar, or so I thought, so when I turned a corner and came to a dead stop I was annoyed. How the fuck could I get lost inside a building? I looked at the door and there was a plaque on it similar to all the other rooms. This was informed me that I was standing outside the SENSORY SUITE, I looked to see if anyone was around but for the first time tonight there was nobody . I opened the door to the suite but it just lead into changing rooms by the look of the signs on the inner doors. In fact everything was pitch black, it looked like that area was shut down, so I closed the door and retraced my steps. Eventually I made my way back to the bar and retook my seat on the stool. After another large Grey Goose I was contemplating just leaving when Sue swept into the bar and asked if she could join me. Nodding I asked the barman to get another seat and when he returned I held my hand out to help her up onto the high stool. I ordered another shot and Sue ordered a dirty Martini and she asked me what I thought about the club. I told her my initial thoughts, but I also explained that I had been hoping to talk to some of the regular members, to find out what sort of people they were and whether they would be the sort of men I would welcome into my exclusive Gentlemen's club that was opening nearby.

The barman was beginning to get on my nerves, he had been trying hard not to giggle all the time Sue had been talking to me and I was just about to tell him where to go when she slowly moved her hand up my thigh and rested it so her very well-manicured nails rested against the head of my semi hard cock. I looked down and was trying to decide how to ask her politely to move it when about a dozen people burst into the bar. They were laughing and joking and making crude comments about what they had seen in the rooms upstairs, my best guess was that these were a group who had had no intention of joining but had come to have a good look around. Sue shot out of her seat and went to talk to them, explaining that they must adhere to the NDA they had signed and if they wanted to leave she would see them out. The men in the group were saying no they wanted to stay but one look at their wives and/or partners faces and they all agreed to call it a night.

I was once again ready to leave when Sue suggested I stay. She informed me that the real members would be arriving around midnight, they all knew it was a taster evening and would wait until the non-members had left before actually coming in. I asked her what time the club closed and she explained that whilst ever the rooms were in use, someone was on duty, so in theory it never really closed. For a day once every month they shut to do a thorough deep clean and any maintenance that needed doing but that was it. I hadn't anywhere to go tomorrow, and let's face it no one was waiting for me at home, so I decided that it would probably be worth my time to wait. I sat back down at the bar and ordered another drink. While I had her attention I decided to ask about the sensory suite and why it was in darkness, all closed up. She laughed and then explained I had answered my own question, I knew I hadn't had that much to drink so I thought about what I'd said.

"It's a sensory deprivation suite; it takes a while to get used to using the room because there are so many rules and things to think about. It's set out so that you go in and there are changing room doors either side for males and females. There is reduced lighting in there to get to used to semi darkness then after you get naked you go through in to the first room in the suite. That's pitch black so you are totally deprived of sight, and the rules ask people not to speak to each other. The room is laid out in a horseshoe shape and there is a continuous bench around the walls at waist height. In addition there is a thick rope that you can use to guide you round the room fastened loosely to the wall. The idea is that you can go in there and do whatever you want without knowing who you are with. The positioning in the room is explained on the wall in the changing room so you know where to stand or sit depending on what you want to experience in the room. "

This got my attention. I was a connoisseur of anonymous sex but that sounded different. I wouldn't have to worry about realising I never asked a girl's name, wouldn't have to turn their heads to the wall for fear of seeing their faces and wishing they kept quiet. It would have an edge to it and potentially make my kind of sex better here. Sue then went on to explain that the other rooms in the suite had something to do with all the other senses. The one for touch depended on whether you wanted to touch or be touched, and the same for smell, taste and hearing. I couldn't quite decide what could possibly be for hearing, but then Sue explained about Ear fetishism and boy you learn something new every day! Not for me though.

Sue was then called away so I turned to the barman and asked him how to get back to the Sensory Suite. I'll admit it I was curious and wanted to go and have a look at the rules and regulations on the wall and find out about the positioning she had referred to. He gave me directions and I left the bar. Looking back I saw Renee was talking to Garrett and it looked like a woman in a blue dress. I wondered if he'd picked her up here or whether it was the illusive Izzy. Not giving them another thought I made my way back down the corridors and after taking a deep breath I opened the door.

As I took a step in I could make out the changing room doors that Sue had mentioned so I opened the door marked 'male' and stepped into what was obviously a very standard looking changing room that wouldn't have looked out of place in any gym. The lighting was very low but on the far wall was an illuminated case that had the rules Sue had mentioned. I made my way across and started to read, it was very clear what was allowed and how you were expected to behave in here. As I read further my dick finally started to respond. I was intrigued. Was it much different for me to go in there and let someone I couldn't see suck my dick, when most nights I was happy to put it in someone I didn't know but was happy to put out? At least this way I didn't have to pretend to like them or run off and hide afterwards. I studied the plan of the room to make sure I understood the positioning, because I knew one thing it might be pitch black but I didn't want a man sucking me off. So if I entered through the door here I needed to grab the rope follow it round until I had passed three knots, then I was in the area where I was looking for a woman, before he second knot I could leave it open for a man to approach me if I wasn't careful. Sitting down meant someone could approach me but if I stood up then I could approach them. All of this had to be done by touch, as the room was in absolute darkness. The rules also stated talking was forbidden, but silence wasn't necessarily expected. I didn't understand how that would work but I was game for a go. I stripped off, put all my clothes in a locker and after taking a huge breath to steady my nerves opened the door. Directly in front of me I found another door with a further reminder of the rules and room positioning on a plaque. There were also instructions to close the door behind me before opening the one in front of me.

This was it, no going back now. It was at this point I had a bit of a wobble. Did I want to do this I asked myself? Of course I did otherwise I wouldn't have got this far, so after a quick pep talk I checked my watch and it was 11.30pm. I'd give myself 15 minutes in here and if no one approached me I would come out again, get dressed and leave. With that thought I opened the door and reached for the rope.

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To AG and Edlovesme as ever I couldn't do this without you thank you x

To everyone in Paris today, our heart are with you, please be safe.


	15. Deprivation Chapter 15

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

BPOV

I wasn't sure who to punch first, Garrett or Renee. Garrett for bringing me here in the first place without telling me what it was, or Renee for the smirk on her face when she watched my reaction to her declaration of "it's an exclusive sex club" Deciding it wasn't worth getting arrested for, I turned and walked to the bar and ordered myself another shot. I was definitely getting near my limit for the night, but the revelation seemed to sober me up quite a bit. I knocked back the shot and ordered another, and at this point the barman leaned over and asked me if I was ok. I nodded and he told me not to worry, lots of people ended up here without their partners telling them beforehand. He said most only stayed an hour and then most men were marched out by their dates. Not wanting to be one of those women, I knocked back my second shot and turned back around to face Garrett. Renee was holding his hand, stroking his palm like she had mine earlier and telling him not to worry and Garrett was looking at me with a very strange expression on his face. I turned back to the barman and asked a question that had been bothering me for the last 10 minutes,

"Renee, our host, that's a man in drag isn't it?"

"Shit shhh, don't let her hear you say that" he said quietly. "She still has all the male bits, but she lives as a woman and is thinking of having the operation, but hasn't decided yet. She is very touchy on the subject so be careful what you say" the barman whispered, the level was almost too low for me to hear, but I got most of the conversation.

Feeling slightly superior but I'm not sure why, I went back to join them and overheard Renee say

"If she wants to leave I'll call her a cab. You don't need to leave though, I'll give you a private tour"

I coughed to get their attention and Garrett pulled his hand away from Renee, I was still deciding whether or not to let him in on her little secret, so I linked my hand around his arm and smiled at Renee,

"Ok how about the tour then?" I enquired.

She smiled at us both and as Garrett said "really?" I nodded started to walk towards the door, pulling him with me. Renee quickly caught up and took charge and for the next 45 minutes she walked us around the club. She was very thorough, showing us every room, restroom, shower and changing room. I couldn't decide whether she wanted to tire me out or if she was trying to find out what turned Garrett on. I think it was the second option because every time we came out of a room she would take a quick glance at his crotch to see if there was any indication of movement.

Personally I wasn't getting much out of this. I certainly didn't want to join in an orgy or go in for a swinging session, I had enough problems as it was without adding extra people into the mix. We followed Renee around and I kept hold of Garrett, more to annoy Renee than anything else, and as the tour came to an end I knew I wouldn't be going home with him. You see one thing that Emmett had missed was that no matter how much I flirted with him, Garrett only had eyes for the males here. In fact I couldn't believe he'd managed to hide from his teammates in the changing rooms at the stadium because it was so obvious.

As we made our way back towards the bar we made one last stop, Renee explained that this was he SENSORY Suite, an assortment of rooms that dealt with the different senses. Garrett didn't seem to understand, bless him, so she explained that one room took away your sight, one was all about touch, with all different pieces of equipment, from feathers to hot stones that could be used on the skin. Finally he got the message when she told him that the taste room meant you could lick things off other people in there, or just literally lick another person's skin.

From the look on his face he was obviously bursting to ask Renee a load of questions, but he was uncomfortable doing it in front of me. Making a decision to give him a break I asked to go back to the bar, I was definitely in need of another drink. The three of us walked back downstairs and I made sure this time to walk behind him, Renee was quick to take my place and as she looped her arm through his I had to smile to myself. As we approached the bar I wondered if Garrett had guessed about Renee, they made a lovely couple and I'm sure with a little persuading he could have a good time with her.

As we sat at a table I ordered another shot and decided to just ask Garrett straight out,

"So Garrett, I 'm guessing that I'm really not your type?"

The look on his face was priceless as he tried to decide how to hide his fear. "I don't know what you mean Izzy"

"Oh come on Garrett. It's obvious that you are much more interested in the guys here, I can see that. If you're worried about me telling Emmett, don't be, your secret is safe with me" I tried to reassure him. "You have to have noticed Renee's interested in you. That would give you the best of both worlds because I'm reliably informed he/she still has all the equipment you're interested in."

Garrett looked at me blankly. I really don't think he had any idea what I was talking about, so I very discreetly whispered to him that Renee had probably been called Reggie in her other life. This seemed to hit home and the smile on his face lit up the room.

"I'll be just over here" I said as Renee returned to join us, she'd been called away by a staff member but that looked as though it was all sorted. I sat at the bar and looked at my watch, it was 10.45pm and Rosalie should be calling me shortly to see if I needed to escape. As soon as she did I would arrange a cab, let her know I was going home alone and leave Garrett to it. Hopefully, so long as he didn't bump into anyone he knew, he should be able to have a very good night tonight. Lucky for some.

The barman poured me another shot and by now I'd lost count of how many I'd had, but was surprisingly still clear headed. I was relaxed and happy, totally unaffected by the way tonight had turned out and I was looking forward to getting out of these sandals and this piece of cloth that was called a dress. Another shot followed and then another. I turned to look back at the table where Garrett and Renee had been sitting and it was empty, I looked at the barman and he just shrugged and said

"They went back in to the club about five minutes ago"

That was me done, I was going to find him and tell him I was leaving. I suppose I could have just gone but I felt like I needed to tell him. I slipped off the stool and made my way back into the club, trying to remember the path we had taken during the tour. After about 10 minutes of wandering around I caught sight through the glass of what I thought was Garrett's shirt so I walked in to the room and just stood transfixed at the sight in front of me. Garrett was on his knees holding up Renee's very long beautiful dress and he was sucking heartily on his/her dick. As I continued to watch another man started undressing him and as soon as his boxer shorts hit the floor the third man crawled in between them and took Garrett's dick in his mouth. I'd seen enough, it was bad enough I wasn't going to get my roaring orgasm tonight but to watch Garrett have one was just too much to bear. I started to wander along the corridor, looking for the way back to the bar when I came across the Sensory Suite again. I lingered outside wondering what it would be like to have the anonymous sex it promised. The alcohol swirled around my blood and I felt my temperature rise as I clamped my legs together. I really wanted to experience a full blown earth shattering orgasm that the girls talked about so freely, why couldn't I manage just one? That's all I needed, just one and I'd be satisfied. Before I knew what was happening I'd opened the door and walked through the door marked female. I stood there looking around me, the dimly lit room was obviously a changing room, I saw the huge frame on the wall and stood in front of it reading through the rules and regulations. It was simple enough to follow, if I went into the room and used the rope as a guide, I could see if there was a man in there who could give me an orgasm.

Knowing I would never be here again, and that I had nothing to lose, I slipped out of my dress, taking about four layers of skin off as I peeled the tit tape off, and placed everything into a locker. Standing naked, I took a deep breath and before I could talk myself out of it I opened the door towards the suite, I looked around me and apart from the rules again the only other thing in this small lobby area was an illuminated clock, I noted it was 11.35pm, I'd give myself 10 minutes and if nothing happened I'd leave and no one would ever be the wiser.

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	16. Deprivation Chapter 16

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

 **I'm sat here with a streaming cough and cold feeling really sorry for myself. What would cheer me up ? Well Rita01tx reviewing me in her Friday post was a massive boost and then the wonderful woman sent me banners for all three of my stories. Please go over to TWCS and look at her handy work she really is amazing, so much so that Deprivation is a featured story of the week this week.**

EPOV

This was so weird, yet in a funny sort of way it's also really relaxing, the warmth of the room, the darkness, the silence and the solitude. I can just imagine some nutty therapist saying this was like being back in the womb or reverting back to being a single sperm. I actually quite liked it, I know I was supposed to be in here for a sordid assignation, or a quick anonymous shag if you preferred, but just for this moment I felt totally at peace, as though everything in my life had come into alignment and all was right with the world. I could also tell I was in here alone right now.

After 5 minutes the appeal of the solitude was beginning to wear off. I tried to focus on the space in front of me, listening for a sign that someone else maybe in here, but it was too quiet, I couldn't hear anyone else breathing so I was definitely alone. I would give it 5 more minutes then I was going to get dressed and leave. I could sit naked in the sauna and steam room in my own club and at least in there I'd have someone to talk to.

I was so relaxed that I wasn't sure that I'd actually heard a door open or not. If I had then I wasn't sure which side of the room it had come from. Thinking about it I'd come in from my right but I'd followed the rope around the room, so where I was sitting meant I needed it to be the door on my left that opened I think. I tried to concentrate, to listen to whoever had come in but I couldn't make anything out, it was really disorientating.

"Shit"

I turned towards the noise, whoever had spoken had definitely been female and she was getting closer to me.

"Oh sorry, I'm not supposed to speak"

I heard a slap sound and I guessed she slapped her hand over her mouth. I could hear her holding in giggles and I wondered for a moment if she was drunk. I mean if she was, it wasn't right was it? One of the very few rules I had was that they had to be the right side of sober. A few drinks loosened up the inhibitions, but a couple further on and you could be storing up a whole slew of problems.

The first thing that struck me was her smell it was the most amazing scent I'd ever come across. It didn't smell like a manufactured scent, it was too natural. I was trying to decide what the dominant note was as she got closer to me. As my sight was totally useless, my sense of smell had definitely kicked up a notch and I could swore I could actually smell the different layers of her gorgeous aroma.

I realised just how close to me she was before she actually touched me. Her hand landed on my shoulder as she tried to feel her way around the wall, for some reason she wasn't using the rope and that meant she wouldn't be able to judge what section of the room she was in. I sat very still until she realised I was there and tried not to startle her. I was trying so hard not to speak but there was only the two of us in here so surely it wouldn't hurt.

"Hi I'm sat here, just to warn you" I said

"I realised someone was here, thanks for warning me though" God her voice was so sexy, it was warm, like silk and I could feel it mingle with her scent and wrap around and envelop me. I took a deep breath, pulling her scent deep into my lungs. I could smell strawberries, sunshine, and coconut and vanilla, it was a happy scent. I'm going completely mad here, the dark is messing with my brain, how can a scent be happy? But it was and I was being a total pussy!

Just as I was mulling over whether my brain was indeed being affected by the darkness, I felt her touch me. It was just a tentative touch, I'd say she had reached out to touch my arm, only to change her mind and pull her hand back. The spot she had touched was tingling so much I had to touch it to see if she had put something on me. I fully expected to find a gel or something on my skin, something that was causing the heat and the tingle, but there was nothing there, the skin was dry but the hairs on my arm were all upright and for the first time in years I had goose bumps. What really caught me unawares though was that the hairs weren't the only things that were pointing towards the ceiling. My dick was rock solid and I'm not quite sure what had set that off. Usually I was a visual guy, you know a quick flash of a good set of boobs, a great ass in a well cut skirt or jeans or a never ending pair of legs in a pair of fuck me heels. This time though I couldn't put it down to that.

I felt her touch me again and this time I was ready. When she placed her hand on my arm I took hold of it and grabbed her hand. I was tempted to stroke her palm, but for some reason that didn't seem the right thing to do so I lifted it to my lips and gently kissed each of her knuckles. It was my way of saying hello, I couldn't really gauge how I was doing so I just had to trust my instincts and go with it.

As soon as I lifted my lips from her hand, she moved and both of her hands grabbed the sides of my face. For a second I wondered what she was going to do, but I waited and she started to touch my face, she was feeling my features, as if she was blind. As her fingertips swept all over my face, I can honestly say it was the most erotic thing I had ever experienced. I sat on the bench letting her go at her own pace; I was too dumbstruck really to participate at this point. My senses were firing all over the place and every single feeling was positive and good.

Her hands were still on my face but very slowly working their way down towards my neck and chest. The heat followed her hands, everywhere she touched was on fire and as her hands moved down my chest towards my dick I was actually worried the heat would be too much. Her fingertips brushed against my freshly cut pubes and I swear they all stood up, as if they were welcoming her hand and guiding it in. I had a vision of the pubes swaying as one, just like you see guys at the airport directing the planes in, my pubes were all in formation. I was still just sitting there, letting her explore me, she had one hand working the hairs around my dick, the other was around the back of my neck and her fingers were gently running through my hair scratching my scalp. I was lost in the sensations she was creating.

I needed her to touch me, I needed to feel that heat on my dick so I gently raised my hand and brought it down in the general area of where I presumed her breasts would be. I felt her nipple against my palm, it was solid and puckered so hard that I could also feel how ridged and drawn in the area around her nipple was. All I wanted to do was suck it in to my mouth, but I was still worried about scaring her off, so I leant forward and just gently kissed it. I physically felt it twitch against my lips, so I did it again but this time I swirled my tongue around before taking it deep in to my mouth. I sucked on it with all my might, I just wanted to take as much of her into my mouth as I could. Her taste was incredible, I was surrounded by her scent, strawberries and tropical smells, but I could taste it as well.

Her hand finally found my dick and I swear she branded me in that moment. The heat was incredible as she gently swept her fingertips up and down my shaft. I couldn't help but buck into her hand, I needed to keep this connection going. She wrapped her palm around me and I could feel the heat and the tingles follow. She slowly moved her hand up and down, lubricating as she went along by picking up the precum that was bubbling out of me. I don't think I had been this turned on ever; this faceless woman was just turning me inside out. I let out a sigh that was because of the silence very loud,

"Naughty boy" she whispered, and she let go of my dick. I was going to complain but she grabbed hold of my balls instead and pulled them away from my body, the pain mixed with the heat and the tingling sensation was just extraordinary. I had to take a deep breath and try and control myself, I was so close to coming, she tugged again releasing my now tender balls,

"Don't talk or we will get thrown out" she whispered.

Her hand gripped me again and as she moved off the bench her other hand followed a path down the side of my neck, across my chest, down my abs and rested on my thigh. I could tell she was in front of me now, but incredibly I still couldn't even make out an outline of her. I waited to see what she was going to do next because if she didn't make a move I was going to take over. I needed to touch her, but she made the decision for me when I felt her lips brush up the length of my dick. It was like someone had stroked a warm steel blade along my sensitive skin, it was almost painful. She slowly started to lick along my shaft paying particular attention to my engorged head. As she blew across it I felt my stomach muscles tighten and my cum make a dash for freedom. I managed not to blow too soon, but as soon as she swallowed my length the game was up. I only managed to hold out for a few minutes, I tried to pull her head away, to warn her I was about to come, but she stayed where she was. I understood what she was telling me, so I relaxed and pushed my dick as far down her throat as she'd let me, I absolutely flooded her throat, and as she swallowed around me it was as if she was recharging me and I just kept coming, and she kept swallowing. I'd never known anything like it. She was literally sucking the energy and life force out of me.

As she lifted off me, she kissed my inner thigh and whispered "thank you, I really enjoyed that".

I was petrified in that second she was going to leave so I grabbed for where I thought was her face was and pulled her towards me. I kissed around her face over and over and asked

"Can I return the favour?"

She was silent for a moment before answering

"Maybe next time"

She pulled away from me and I heard a shuffling noise, then a door opening.

"No don't go" I said out loud, but there was no answer, she had already left.

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Thank you to all of you for reviewing I love getting your comments and teasing you a little with the answers to your questions.

To AG and Edlovesme thank you thank you thank you as ever xx


	17. Deprivation Chapter 17

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

BPOV

 _ **OK this is where it gets difficult because I don't want to repeat the last chapter. I've tried to give you an insight into what's happening in Bella's head so bear that in mind please.**_

This sounds stupid in my head, but it is really dark in here. I know that this is a Sensory Deprivation suite but really, it's pitch black, I can't see a thing. I'd stepped into the room and I was trying to remember the layout so I knew where to go, but I couldn't find the wall rope either,

"Shit"

This was such a mistake. Maybe I should just turn around and go back through the door. This was such a mistake. What was I thinking? Then I realised I'd spoken out loud and that wasn't allowed

"Oh sorry, I'm not supposed to speak", stupid stupid Bella.

I went to cover my mouth, but the slap was much harder than I meant to do. I was getting into such a state that I had to supress a nervous giggle. I stood trying to work out if anyone else was in here but I was breathing so heavily it was all I could hear.

I tried to feel for the guide rope on the wall but I was flapping around like a mad woman. There was definitely no rope here so I moved forward a few steps. It was like playing "Blind man's bluff" when I was a child, except I'm now an adult and standing here naked. I was stood, totally blind waving my arms about trying to connect with something, anything, anything at all. Surprisingly I wasn't panicking; don't get me wrong I'm not frightened of the dark or anything, but I was totally lost in a small enclosed room and naked. I was just about ready to try and find a way out when my fingers felt skin and I pulled my hand away quickly. Weirdly though I felt the tingles you get when you pass on an electric shock, surely I wasn't static in here? I placed my hand back on the skin and realised I was touching a shoulder. I could make out the curve and feel the hardness of the bone and as I splayed out my fingers I could feel the area where his neck met his shoulder. I was sure it was a man, if not it was a big butch hairy woman, the physique was definitely muscular and I could feel the downy hair.

"Hi I'm sat here, just to warn you" a male voice said, it was a local accent, quite a musical tone to it and very sexy. I almost giggled again, how I could think a voice was sexy I wasn't too sure, but it was, it was very smooth, and the tone was just wonderful, very welcoming was probably the best way of describing it.

I knew I need to answer him, even though I wasn't supposed to,

"I just realised someone was here, thanks for warning me"

I was unsure now what to do, what was the etiquette here? I wish I'd taken a better look at the rules and regulations on the wall. Should I wait for him the touch me or should I make a move? I suppose what I really needed to decide was what I wanted from being in here because, how was I ever going to get my orgasm if nobody touched me or I didn't initiate something? With this in mind I reached out again and found his arm, and the tingles were back. After a quick sweep with my fingers I went to place it on his chest but he swept it up and pulled it to his lips. It was such an old fashioned gesture as he kissed each of my knuckles that for a second I wondered just how old he was. Would it matter if he was a lot older than me or did I just go with the old saying,' it's not what you've got, it's what you do with it?'

I needed to know, so as soon as he finished kissing my knuckles I moved both hands to his face. With my fingertips I traced his features, his skin was smooth and he definitely looked after it, there were no wrinkles just beautiful bone structure, a straight nose and a very square strong jaw. I could feel some stubble but I wasn't sure whether it was cut very short, or just a day's re-growth. I adjusted myself so I could get a better feel of him as I traced down his chest and across his abs. This was not the body of an older man, this was a man who looked after himself, both physically and personally. My hands roamed everywhere and I tried to cover as much skin as possible, so one hand went around his neck and into his hair, the other went towards what was between his legs. I wasn't quite sure what I was excited about most because his hair was as soft as silk and I could get lost just touching it. It was fashionably long and felt messy but I could feel that it was well cut, even styled maybe. The fingertips of my other hand were buried in his pubic hair which was quite short and obviously freshly trimmed because the ends were quite sharp against my skin.

Just as I was going to move in and start to touch his dick he surprised me by touching my breast. Not only did he touch, but he leant forward and kissed it and after teasing it he took my nipple and the flesh around it into his mouth. It was a strange sensation at first, usually I just found this a pointless exercise, I mean nipples are for babies, other than that they have very little function other than showing everyone your cold. This was different though, my nipples reacted almost instantly, and I certainly wasn't cold. They were so hard they physically hurt, he was almost tormenting them, me, but he knew what he was doing, and he knew how to get a reaction from my body. This was a good start, I was starting to get excited, to feel something, and maybe just maybe I would finally get my mind blowing orgasm. As my excitement grew I started to move again, I wanted to explore a little further, so I brushed my fingertips along his erect shaft. He was well endowed, I could feel the length and the girth and as I finally gripped him in my palm and slowly drew my hand backwards and forwards, I heard him let out a loud sigh

"Naughty boy" I teased him and I let go of him and started to play with his balls. They were heavy and the skin felt stretched, as if they were ready to explode. I wanted to put one in my mouth, I'd always wondered what it would feel like to have the smooth skin on my tongue but now didn't seem the right time, I couldn't help but squeeze them and give them a tug though instead. If he was going to let me play I really wanted him in my mouth, suddenly as I squeezed his balls again he moaned loudly, too loudly

"Don't talk, we will get thrown out" I told him, I was tempted to smack his inner thigh, but I wasn't sure if he would be into that. I didn't even know if I was into that so where the hell had that thought come from?

I moved in front of him because I'd had that sudden urge to suck his dick. I needed to reclaim that, I needed to do something I used to enjoy and James had ruined for me. I set to work swallowing him down my throat revelling in the feeling of his smooth skin in my mouth. It was amazing, instead of the horrible taste I'd been putting up with, he was almost pleasant, his musky smell was well, manly, not locker room manly just manly. As I worked him he tried to tell me he was getting close, but I could tell that anyway, I could feel his balls swelling even more and his dick was pulsing and I'd felt it grow fractionally. I was going to swallow, I'd already made that decision, if he tasted as good as he smelt, then it would be more than ok. He groaned and pushed himself further down my throat so I swallowed around him, this must have been the encouragement he was waiting for because he came hard, the amount of cum in my throat was incredible and I had to swallow quickly over and over again. I can't say the taste was nectar but it certainly wasn't unpleasant. I was just starting to worry about whether I could keep up with the swallowing when he finally started to deflate, so I backed off him and kissed his inner thigh

"Thank you, I really enjoyed that". I told him honestly.

He surprised me by grabbing my face and trying to lift me towards him, his lips caught the end of my nose and then my cheek, eyelids, forehead and finally my chin

"Can I return the favour?" he whispered.

"Maybe next time" I finally answered. It took me awhile, long enough that I'd managed to move back from him and step away, as I finally found the rope on the wall I moved backwards until I hit the door. As I backed through it I'm sure I heard him say "don't go" but it was too late, the door had already closed.

I sat in the changing room trying to get my thoughts in order. I wasn't totally sure why I had left the room when I did because I hadn't got what I'd come here looking for. I had been closer in the last ten minutes though than I'd ever been before and I'd reclaimed my love of blow jobs so I knew I'd be able to do that again. All I had to do now was find someone who could help me build on tonight, because to be honest the thought of having my first ever true orgasm with someone I couldn't see and didn't even know the name of kind of scared me.

Getting dressed was a nightmare , I hadn't been careful enough when I got undressed so it took me ages to unravel the piece of silk that was my dress. I finally sorted it out and tried to reattach the tit tape and tidy up my hair and makeup. Eventually looking like I hadn't just given a blow job to a complete stranger, I left. From start to finish I had been in there about an hour and most of that time was spent in the changing room. I started to walk back towards the bar so I could sort out a cab home, when I heard my name being called.

Looking round to see who had shouted me, I was met with the sight of Renee/Reggie buried balls deep in Garrett. Garrett, yes I'd forgotten all about him for the past hour, but then it didn't look like he was missing me much either. It was so strange to see, this beautiful looking woman, with a full set of obviously working equipment setting a punishing rhythm and he/she pounded into Garrett's ass.

"Wait for me in the bar please Izzy" he begged " I need to talk to you" all this was said in between those little sex noises that I always imagined everyone except me made.

I nodded and walked away, I really needed a drink anyway.


	18. Deprivation Chapter 18

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 18

EPOV

I sat looking in the direction of the door, Surely she would come back, she wouldn't just leave , not when she had just awakened something in me that I didn't even realise I was capable of feeling. I sat looking in the direction of the door she'd left through but it didn't re open. Ok I needed to act and fast, I stumbled my way through the dark room, roughly following the edge of the continuous bench until I was back at the entry door I'd come I through. It was lucky we had been in the room on our own, or I would have been apologising to people as I stumbled over them. Finally barging through into the changing room I struggled in the dim light, I took a few seconds to try and re- acclimatise to the lighting before I started throwing my clothes on. I couldn't afford to waste any time, I was banking on her being a typical woman and that it would take her at least 10 minutes to get dressed and if that was the case I could be outside the door when she came out.

Stumbling back into the corridor, still trying to tuck my shirt into my pants, I had a quick look round to see if I could see anyone about, no one was out here so I was sure she was still getting dressed. Good I hadn't missed her. I checked my watch, I was sure I'd only taken about 8 minutes from when she walked out of the room so I leaned against the wall opposite, made myself comfortable and hopefully not to 'stalkerish' and waited.

Ten minutes later I was still waiting, no one had come in or out of the main door to the suite and I was now really worried, how could I have missed her? Was she some super new breed of woman who got ready in five minutes or was I in the room far longer than I thought? Maybe I had missed her.

I want to say panic set in, but what could I panic about, I started to walk towards the bar, checking out every room as I went past, It was stupid really because I didn't know who I was looking for, but I couldn't help myself. The rooms were still busy, there were people in all manner of positions and stages of undress, but for once I was completely disinterested. Finally I made it to the bar and I went straight up to the barman.

"Hi has a woman come through here in the last 10 minutes?" I asked

"Several Sir, are you looking for someone in particular?" He answered unhelpfully

"I'm not sure, erm who came in here?"

"I don't do names, it's best I don't know but there were a couple of regulars whose faces I recognised" he explained.

I sat down and ordered another shot, taking it back in one gulp I slammed the glass on the bar and stood straight back up. It was no good I couldn't settle, I needed to know if she was still here or if she had left. I walked to the door and the doorman was just closing the outside doors.

"Hi has a woman just left?" I asked, how desperate did I look?

The doorman looked at me as if I was speaking a foreign language before he asked me if I needed a cab. Is that all that was left of the night, I could go back inside and just wonder around, maybe I would pick up her scent again. Realising I was acting like some sort of deranged bloodhound I decided it was probably best to call It a night.

Nodding at him, he pushed a button at the side of the door and within 30 seconds I was climbing in to the back of a car. The drive home passed in a blur my mind on what had happened, before I knew it I was paying the driver and climbing the stairs to my apartment. As I walked out and sat on my balcony I tried to take stock of what happened.

Some strange woman had walked into my life tonight and shaken it to the core. I never saw her face and didn't know her name but I could still feel her fingertips as they traced all over my chest and abs. The heat that she had branded my dick with meant I was still semi hard and had been ever since I'd slipped out of her throat. I couldn't believe that one anonymous blow job could have such an effect on me. I was still reacting to her touch even now, my pants were tight again from my ever hardening dick as I remembered the way she made me feel, my skin was still fizzing from the remnants of her touch.

This was ridiculous, I needed to get her touch off me completely or I needed to fuck her, and seeing as I couldn't do the latter I needed to shower, to cleanse myself of her, her scent and wash myself clean. As soon as I made the decision I stripped off and stepped into my shower, the water was hot and I just stood there and let it cascade down my torso, I didn't want to move so I just stood trying to cleanse myself. I picked up my body wash and as I squirted a large dollop into my hand I suddenly realised what part of her smell had been, the tropical element was on her body, her body wash must have been the majority of her scent. That thought sent me off in a different direction and I started to think about her body as my hand went to my now solid dick.

As I emerged from my bathroom much later I was exhausted. What had meant to be an exercise in cleansing myself of her turned into one long session of self-love, my dick would just not deflate, I came twice during my shower, both times trying to imagine what she looked like, but each time keeping my eyes tightly closed while I imagined it was her stroking my dick and not me.

I fell in to a dreamless sleep, I was so exhausted I'm sure my body and brain just shut down to enable me to sleep and it worked because the next morning I woke clear headed and alert. This was surprising because I knew I had put away a large amount of Grey Goose, much more than I'd intended at the start of the evening. As I stood, having a good scratch whilst I operated my coffee machine, I tried to decide my next move. I needed to go back to the club, but how did I start trying to find her? She could have been there with her partner and just had a bit of a dalliance, she could have been on the taster night and have no intention of going back again or even worse in my eyes she could be a serial swinger and last night was the norm, she could be there doing it again tonight. I'm not sure why that last thought bothered me as much as it did.

That final thought was depressing and as I slumped on my sofa and finished off my first coffee of the day I told myself I had to stay positive. I needed to find her, see her again if you will just to see if she had the same effect on me; to see if I was capable of feeling that huge amount of emotion again. More importantly I needed to see if that initial meeting was as strong as I thought it was, because for the first time in my adult life I actually felt a real connection to another person and the ironic thing was I'd discovered it while having anonymous sex once again.

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	19. Deprivation Chapter 19

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 19

BPOV

I was so tempted to tell him where to shove it, but Renee was doing such a good job of filling that orifice at the moment that I stopped myself and decided to walk away, I had to have a little giggle to myself the situation was just…... Was it wrong to laugh? I didn't think so, I tried to imagine what Rosalie was going to say when I told her about tonight, that caused to me to roar with laughter and I knew then I really did need a drink and a minute to collect my thoughts.

As I approached the bar I heard a glass slam down on the bar and a stool screech along the floor, someone was obviously in a hurry, I stopped to check myself one last time in the mirror, I wanted to make sure I wasn't giving everyone a free nipple show and that the tit tape was keeping the girls at least under control. Heading into the bar I sat down on the warm stool and after moving the empty glass away from in front of me, I asked the barman for a large Grey Goose with lots of ice. My bar tab tonight was going to be horrendous, so when I asked for the total I was relieved to find out for the VIP guests it taken care of. At least I'd have one result tonight and a free hangover tomorrow, another giggle escaped me and the barman looked at me trying to judge whether I was at the 'cutting off' stage or not.

"This place has a strange effect on me" I tried to explain to both myself and the poor uninterested barman.

"It's like that for everyone their first time, they either love it or hate it, what side of the fence have you come down on?" he asked.

That was a good question, what did I think? I certainly didn't hate it but I can't say I loved it either, had I had a good time? Well if being dumped by my date so he could get well and truly fucked by a very pretty man constituted a good time then hell I was in Disneyland. My time here hadn't been wasted though because I'd reclaimed my right to enjoy blowjobs, which was a major plus point. Thinking now about the guy, whoever he was, he was very fit, had an amazing body and his hair was gorgeous, so soft and silky. He smelt wonderful too, very masculine and clean and he did make me feel good about certain things so yes tonight did have some plus points.

I sat and waited for Garrett. I was curious to see what he was going to say, an apology wasn't really necessary, well maybe it was, but an explanation definitely was. I was interested to find out if I was here just as a cover for him, if it was planned or if Renee had snared him in her sexual web. I really needed to stop referring to him as her; the bits I'd seen definitely proved Renee was all man.

Finally Garrett came into the bar, he had a glow about him that screamed freshly fucked and my first reaction really was jealousy. I was jealous that he had been so thoroughly seen to. As he stood at the side of me he ordered us both a drink and asked me to move away from the bar. We moved across to one of the soft comfortable sofas and I half turned to face him.

"Well tonight didn't quite go as planned" was the best thing I could come up with it.

"I know Izzy and I'm so sorry I abandoned you, but I just couldn't resist him. Renee is the most beautiful person I have ever come across, and to find him, well I can't just walk away, I need him in my life I know that already." Garrett was in bits, he had his head in his hands and I was worried he was about to break down and cry.

"Well for someone who has found the love of his life, you don't seem too happy about it" I said as I rubbed his back. I wanted to comfort him, but I just wasn't that sort of girl. I wasn't a huggy, feely, touchy person.

"Bella I need to ask you a huge favour and I know I have no right because we don't even know each other well but I can only ask." He looked at me with these big puppy eyes and I was so close to telling him to 'grow a pair' when I realised I should probably at least hear him out. Nodding I told him to go on

"Well as you have obviously guessed I'm gay. I've known since I was about seven years old, but you are the first person I've ever told. My parents, my family, my teammates, they have no idea. I've never fought it; I've just sort of ignored it and every so often when the urge gets too much, I've come to a place like this where it's safe and just let go for a night. That usually tides me over for a while because I have to be extremely careful not to draw attention to myself. Usually I go out of state so no one recognises me and I'm just another gay man. I'm telling you this because I want to start coming here regularly and I was wondering if you would join with me and come as my partner. That way if any of my team mates are here, they will see me with you, and if anyone talks and gossip gets around then Emmett will know you're here with me"

I was amazed, I just sat looking at him with my mouth open and my vocabulary reduced to an assortment of grunts. The cheeky bastard wanted me to be his beard and I had to pay the subscription to this club for the pleasure of it.

"Of course I will pay for your membership, and all I ask is that you don't mention my sexuality to anyone, especially Emmett. If when we get here any of my team mates are in, you stay with me and we'll just drink in the bar. I would like to come one night a week at least with you, but if I can get away during the week and I'm sure none of the team will be here I'll come on my own. All you'll have to do is shield me if anyone is here I know"

I looked at him, then back at the bar, then back to him, I was too ….well I wasn't quite sure what I was, amazed, confused, annoyed, pissed off, angry….the list went on and on.

"Garrett, I need to go home and think about this, give me your number and I will call you tomorrow" I told him.

We left the club about ten minutes later sharing a cab, but I got dropped off first. I got out without saying anything and let Garrett pick up the tab for the ride.

After stripping out of the dress and flinging my shoes the length of my bedroom me and 'Pete the Pussy Tamer' went to bed. At least I could rely on him.

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	20. Deprivation Chapter 20

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 20

EPOV

I needed a plan. I could quite easily just buy a membership to the club and sit in the bar and wait but how would I recognise her again? Would it be easier to just sit in the dark room and wait and see if she came back in? I suppose if she was a serial swinger and she got off on anonymous sex she would be in there again at some point, I would just have to be patient.

In reality I couldn't keep going back there night after night so I would have to try and go on popular nights and just hope she's around. I have to have faith that I will recognise her. In fact I'm sure I will know her by her scent because I can still smell it in my nostrils, the strawberry smell mixed in with a tropical fragrance, coconuts, the beach and the sun. It was so distinctive and unique I would recognise it instantly I knew that.

I needed to start my day, so after a nice long relaxing shower where I managed to rid myself of a little of the 'sexual stress' I was feeling, I made my way over to the building site that was my new soon to be club. Putting on my hard hat and high visibility jacket I went in search of the Project Manager I had hired on the recommendation of my new architect Carlisle. Interesting to see him there last night, I wonder how he got on, his partner certainly didn't look happy to be there, anyway Edward focus and back to the present, I found him in the back of the building pacing out where our new swimming pool was going to go.

"Hi Charlie, how is everything going?" I asked as he started drawing white lines all over the floor.

"Well we have broken ground in the basement, so once I get word about when the scaffolding is going up, we can start work on the roof. As soon as that is sorted we can get the building watertight and dry and start to work inside. It might be an old building but it's structure is sound. As you can see I'm just starting to mark out a rough guideline for the swimming pool so we can start to excavate."

We spent an hour or so just walking round the site so we could start to visualise where everything would be. Charlie had Carlisle's plans all up on one of the only walls that was staying so we stood and just checked everything was ok. This club was going to be more luxurious than my first one, I'd learnt from what we did last time and technology and gadgets had moved on in such a short period of time. It was silly things really, like the televisions we could put in the showers, so they could watch the news or the markets while they were getting showered and changed. The lighting was going to be different and the new hot tub and Jacuzzi we were going to install were just like spaceships compared to the ones we used last time. In fact I was so excited about this build I was thinking of updating my first club before I decided on where or if I'd even have a third.

As I finally leave the building site, and say goodbye to Charlie I can't help but look up the block towards DESIRE, the pull to go back was so strong that I couldn't help myself. I quickly walked over to see if anyone was about and as I got closer it was as if I was being pulled in. The door opened as I stepped on the carpet again and just like last night, and as I stepped inside someone, this time Sue came around the corner to greet me.

"Hi Edward I didn't get time to speak to you much last night, how did you enjoy it? Do you think you could get into the scene?" she asked as we sat on the couch and she called to one of the staff milling around to bring coffee for us.

"I'm not quite sure to be honest, I was amazed at how busy the place was, I didn't realise there was such a market for this" I told her honestly.

"It's not that there is a huge market, it's just that there are very few places where these people can go and be themselves, in an atmosphere that is totally safe. They look after this club and almost police it themselves because if it was to disappear there isn't another fetish club in the state." She explained.

"So if I joined what could I expect?" I was interested but I was just trying to keep her talking, I had no idea how to bring up my mystery woman but I knew I needed to try.

"It's not about what you can expect, it's totally about you and what you want out of it. The more you participate, the more you will get out of it." Sue was obviously more than just the owner of the club, she was obviously into something in a big way.

"So what are you in to Edward? Don't be shy, is it men, women or both?" she asked

"Oh Sue it' definitely ladies, but I am not into relationships, I am more of your pick up, fuck em and leave em kind of guy" I told her , there was no point in lying to her, she was one person who wouldn't judge.

"Well you could have your pick here, you wouldn't have to worry about any of them being clingy or wanting to be bought dinner and roses" she joked.

"I know that and that's why I am seriously thinking of joining, but I have to be honest. I'm not getting the same buzz anymore from just picking up random women and fucking them. I'm starting to want or need more, I'm just not sure what that actually is"

"Well how about I offer you a temporary membership? Let's say three months, and you can come and try a few different things in that time. Who knows you might really find something you've never tried before and it could blow you away or just blow you, who knows?" she smiled at her own joke, but little did she know how close she had come to uncovering me.

"You know Edward you should really try our Sensory Deprivation Suite, it's one of my favourite rooms here. That really is anonymous sex in there because you don't know what the person looks like or sounds like. If you wanted to, if it goes well, you could arrange to meet the person in the bar afterwards if you had a connection. You'd be surprised how many couples have actually started their relationships after meeting in one of the deprivation rooms. It seems to add another dimension especially when they have to rely on their gut instincts instead of what they can see and hear."

I played dumb, hoping she really didn't know I'd already been in there.

"Really so does the suite get a lot of use?" I needed to push to see if she would give me any information at all.

"It seems to have a small core of people who use it all the time, but obviously as they work their way through the regulars it seems to calm down until just after a new intake of members. They smell fresh meat as such." She laughed.

"Oh right, so did you get many new members from last night, the place seemed to busy enough?"

"Well last night was a complete disaster new members wise to be honest. We didn't sign anyone last night but have had a phone call this morning to sign up a couple. For the first time ever we seemed to have totally misjudged our potential clientele. In fact from what I can gather apart from you and the couple everyone else was a just a nosy voyeur.

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To AG and Edlovesme thank you for your help as ever.

To all my lovely reviewers, I can't believe how you have all taken this story to your hearts, thank you so much, I'm so glad your enjoying it.


	21. Deprivation Chapter 21

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

BPOV

Pete managed to raise a very brief ripple, definitely not a smile but maybe just a smirk. My night didn't improve either, I had so much alcohol in my system that my brain wouldn't shut off so at 4.30am I was sat bolt upright in bed after another horrific nightmare. I was being chased around my apartment by a giant set of balls with a very flaccid shrivelled dick attached. They had a badge pinned on them that said "Used to belong to Garrett".

I really needed to remember to drink lots of water before I went to bed because I couldn't cope with these vivid images keeping me awake. I settled back down with my iPad and read for an hour or two before dozing off again just before I was rudely awoken by my phone. Looking at the clock it was 10.00 am I presumed the only person who would ring this early on a Sunday was Rosalie.

"What the fuck do you want this early?" Was my ladylike greeting

"Oh sorry Izzy, I thought you would be up and about by now, I forget that not everyone has to be up early for training"

"How did you get my number? I don't remember giving it to you last night" I asked trying to wake myself up.

"I couldn't concentrate this morning so I called and asked Emmett for your number, I told him I forgot to get it last night. I also need to fill you in on what I told him happened last night because we need to make sure our stories are straight" he explained.

I lay back down on my pillows and rubbed my eyes. How the fuck did I get wrapped up in all this deception? All I wanted was to have one night of uncomplicated, orgasmic, fuck hot sex and now I was involved in a complete stranger's very intimate personal life. In addition to that he was asking me to lie to one of my oldest friends because how could I tell Rosalie the truth if she was with Emmett?

"Look I'm not even awake yet, let me have a shower, a coffee or two and put on some clothes and I'll call you back, I need to be alert to hear all this."

I promised to call him back so after dragging myself out of bed I found myself sitting on my couch staring at my phone willing myself to dial his number.

Just as I had finally worked myself up to do it, my phone rang making me scream out loud. I fumbled as I picked it up and tried to answer before it rang off, I could see it was Rosalie and that made me hesitate just for a second. Finally I answered on the last ring before it went to voicemail and she didn't even give me a chance to say hello.

"So girlie is your vag so sore you can't sit down or are you still at it and I'm interrupting?"

I was too confused to answer, what the hell was I supposed to say? Sorry Rosie but he was a raving queen who takes it up the arse or yes my bed saw so much action my sheets melted. In the end I just burst into tears…..

I know I'm not a touchy feely person, but I'm not made of stone either. Everyone has a safety valve and limit, somehow after everything last night I had obviously reached mine!

"Bella what the fuck! What happened? Did he hurt you? I'll fucking kill him and Emmett if he has hurt you in any way, Bella talk to me, what has happened, are you alright? Bella, Bella..."

The next thing Rosalie is in front of me, she has her own key for emergencies, and for when I lock myself out, this is really helpful as she is only five minutes away, and she is just holding me, stroking my hair and trying to calm me.

"Bella do we need to take you to the hospital, are you hurt, did he…?"

This seemed to seep in to my brain and it kick started it, I must have needed a reboot or something. I managed to stop the tears and turning to her reached for the tissues she had in her hand. After a good nose blow and mopping up of the stray tears and snot I was able to calm down. While I went to wash my face she made us a coffee and when I made my way back to the couch she handed me a fresh cup and a couple of aspirin. I took them and I tried to put things in order so I could tell her about my night, Garrett be damned, Rosalie was my oldest friend and I wasn't going to lie to her.

"'I'm sorry for frightening you Rosalie, I had a terrible night's sleep, far too much alcohol, and I saw and did things last night that you will just not believe I was capable of getting involved with."

She gave me a hug and just held me, "Right start at the beginning and tell me what that prick did, then we can decide on his punishment" she said.

I started to tell her about the club he'd taken me to, as ever Rosalie had heard of it but hadn't been, so she quizzed me on what it was like. Eventually I returned to the story and explained about Renee and how Garrett had been so enamoured with him/ her and that he had ditched me. I was just about to explain that she was indeed a he and about my mystery man when she jumped up and took out her phone.

"Some fucking friend you have, he took Bella to a sex club and then promptly went off and fucked someone else, I'm going to rip his dick off when I see him next time and you, well your punishment is to be decided, we had one shot at getting Bella laid properly and I let you talk me into it being someone I couldn't check out, I trusted you" she shouted and then she hung up.

"I take it that was Emmett?" I asked and she nodded. She didn't realise it but she had just helped Garrett enormously. Once the conversation got around the dressing room his reputation would be at an all-time high, he was Mr Sex (with the Ladies) again.

"Well you should have let me finish before you blew up at him, you only have half of the story" I said as she slumped back down on the couch.

"I only gave you the outline, I need to fill you in on the actual events, but before I do I need to know how important Emmett is to you"

She looked at me warily and for once maybe a little uncertainly, I knew then she had started to fall for him. Wow, that was a turn up for the books, our Rosalie had finally fallen for someone.

"Well I'll admit to you that I like him, a bit, well more than a bit, probably….yes more than a bit, but that's all I'm admitting to, so whatever the prick and his team mate have done you had better tell me know before …" she ranted and I cut her off

"Well when I said that Garrett was into Renee what I didn't tell you was that it was actually Renee that was in Garrett. By that I mean Renee was actually a he, a very beautiful he granted, but a he all the same, with a full set of working male bits and he was very definitely in Garrett if you get my meaning. You see Garrett is 100% gay and all the talk in the changing room is just that, talk, he is absolutely scared shitless that it will come out. I haven't spoken to him properly yet but I'm presuming that he was going to take me there to act as cover and if I was in to it, he would have been able to slip off and see what was on offer."

Again Rosalie reacted, she was up storming round the apartment threatening to rip parts of Emmett and Garrett off and use them for all manner of things. Eventually when she had worked all the anger out she came and sat back down.

"I'm so sorry sweetheart, we thought we were helping you, we just wanted you to have a good night. I trusted Emmett's word when I should have followed my instincts and made sure that we had references and even a personal recommendation, from a woman."

I couldn't help but laugh, she was taking this so seriously when really it was just a blind date that didn't pan out.

"Now I promised Garrett that I wouldn't tell Emmett. I know I shouldn't have but to be honest I just wanted to get away last night and try and get my head straight, so I need to ask you to not say anything for the time being. In fact you played a blinder by telling Emmett that Garrett went with another woman, because you've just strengthened his reputation."

It took me a good ten minutes, and in the end some strong pleading, to get Rosalie to understand why I was going to help Garrett out. All she could see was that I'd been let down but I didn't see it quite like that. The more I talked to her I realised I felt quite sorry for Garrett because whilst my problem was unfortunate it wasn't messing with my life, Garrett on the other hand was living a complete lie and I maybe I could try and ease that a little for him.

"Anyway I haven't told you the best bit about my night yet" I needed to move the conversation on as Rosalie was still threatening to take out a full page ad in the local paper exposing Emmett and Garrett as secret lovers. While it would have been funny to see Emmett's face I know Garrett wouldn't have coped with that at all.

"There was a good bit?" she questioned.

"There was"

"Well don't keep me in suspense"

"Well I gave someone a blowjob and I really enjoyed it. It was just how I've always imagined it should be, not like I've put up with before" I was hoping she would let that go and it would be enough information but who was I kidding, I knew I'd just opened the floodgates.

"Who,when,where,why….who, spill now" was her ….instruction, yes it was definitely not a question more of an order.

"I can't really answer a lot of that,

Who…I don't know,

When … last night at the club

Where…. In a pitch black room

Why… because I needed to feel something, anything, because I could, because he felt incredible under my fingers, because he kissed my knuckles so gently… I don't know."

She was looking at me in that way, the way she looks when I've just told her something she finds odd or strange, like when I want to wear flats and jeans, but she wants me to wear next to nothing and heels that are death traps.

"So Bella, Let me get this straight. Whilst Garrett was off getting his ass filled, you went into a pitch black room, tapped a stranger on the shoulder and he kissed your hand sweetly, so you swallowed his dick?"

I thought about it, yep she had the basic gist really.

"Yep and by the way we were both naked"

"Fuck! Is it too early for a drink?" she asked as she flopped back against the sofa.

"I'll make another coffee, because I have to call Garrett back shortly and talk to him, he will wonder what has happened to me but before I can do that you have to decide what you are going to tell Emmett".

The rest of the morning was taken up with discussion and negotiation, me telling here every detail of what had happened, and then negotiating to try and find a solution so she didn't have to lie too much to Emmett, but we could keep Garrett's secret.

In the end the only solution we could come up with was that I would have to become Garrett's 'girlfriend' I could be his beard/front for his public image and at the club and he would be my date when I needed one. We could both still date freely as long as we were discreet. That would be quite easy for me, he was going to have to keep his 'real life' very hidden just like he seemed to have been doing all along and I just hoped that Renee was ready for that, because she didn't really scream discreet to me at all.


	22. Deprivation Chapter 22

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

EPOV

It's Thursday night and this week has really dragged. I'm sitting here with Jasper, Emmett and some of his team mates at a sports bar watching proper American football, not the rubbish they play. I can't say that out loud because Emmett would never forgive me, but let's be honest all they do is just kick a ball round. Emmett is adamant that their game involves more skill and less physical strength but I just don't see it.

I keep looking at one of the guys we are here with, he looks familiar but I can't place him. I've met most of his team mates over the past couple of years but this one is a newbie he's only been with them for a season I think. It's really bothering me but I know it will come to me eventually so I return my focus to the big screen. As I drink my beer and eat the huge burger that Emmett had ordered for me my mind drifts again to the mystery woman. I know I can't think too hard as I really don't want to be sitting at a table with a load of a soccer players sporting a huge hard on because that would be too embarrassing to deal with or to explain. So instead on focusing on the feel of her touch and her smell I start to think about what she said, the one thing that I'm clinging onto is that she said "Maybe next time". Now to me that means

She intends to visit the club again

She intends to find me again

She could know who I am, maybe she saw me go in and followed me

If that's the case she could be waiting to see when I go back

It has to be someone I saw while I was there

Renee was very attentive and touchy feely

Sue was also very attentive and touchy feely

I slammed my beer back onto the table and the conversation stopped as everyone looked at me, as I looked around to see what the problem was it was obvious the new guy had been in full flow about something and Emmett had left the table.

"Sorry man, I was miles away" I offered and he launched straight back into his story.

"Anyway as I was saying I loved the place. Izzy was amazing and let me go off on my own so I could indulge in whatever I wanted. She stayed in the bar I think, but I'm not sure I never really asked, I was in the middle of this amazing sandwich, having my dick sucked and fondling this amazing rack. "

The guy was on a roll and I placed him instantly, he was the guy I the club Saturday night with the woman in the blue dress, the illusive Izzy. What a dickhead though I thought, he was out with a girl and he dumped her in a sex club of all places for someone else. I might be a fuck em and leave em type of guy but even I have my standards.

"I spoke to Izzy and we have both joined the club so I suppose I'll be seeing some of you there. I'm hoping the old saying of' what happens in the club stays in the club' is adhered to boys" he said with a smirk on his face.

The table erupted in laughter and finally Emmett returned to the table, "Shit I'm going to have to lay off the chilli, my arse is just like that Joe Cocky song, The Ring Of Fire"

Everyone at the table looked at him to see if he realised what he'd said and when it was obvious he had no idea he had completely the wrong singer and the wrong name the table collapsed in hysterics again. This caused the conversation to move away from Garrett and the light hearted banter continued the rest of the night.

It was only when I got home later that I thought about my earlier revelations. It would make sense for the mystery woman to have been either Renee or Sue, both were around the club, both had just finished their tours, neither made an appearance after I left the suite and Sue was very friendly the next morning. I was sure she said something about the suite being her favourite room or something. Perhaps she was trying to tell me something, that it was her? The more I thought about it though, the more I realised I hadn't smelt her aroma when I'd sat with her the next morning, but I suppose she could wear a different scent during the day, did women do that? I just used the nearest bottle of aftershave, but I had to admit I had several different ones. I had however thought that the scent on the mystery woman was very natural and wasn't man made.

All this wondering was driving me mad so I tried to put it to the back of my mind. I had already made the decision that I was going back to the club on Saturday night, it was exactly a week since the taster evening and if she had been there last week, let's hope she would be there again a week later.

The following day I was back at the new site, I hadn't been over for a few days and Charlie had been working wonders as the project manager. The building was completely encased in scaffolding and the roofers were fixing the roof. Luckily most of the slate was in good order so the beams and joists underneath hadn't been too badly affected by the elements meaning I wouldn't need to shell out for a completely new roof, just some decent patching. They were on track to have the roof watertight this weekend so Charlie was on the phone to the building crew giving them notice we were ready for them come Monday morning. As I listened to him deal with them, my phone rang, it was a call from Emmett,

"Hi Bud, how are you?" he shouted down the phone. I'm still not quite sure Emmett actually had an indoor voice or realised how telecommunications worked. We use iPhone now not pieces of string and tin cans and he really didn't need to shout to be heard.

"I'm fine Emmett, why are you calling at this time, shouldn't you be kicking a ball around somewhere?" I teased

"Fuck off! You know today is gym day and stamina training. I'm actually calling to invite your sorry ass out tonight, Rosalie and her friends are coming as well to Jas's new bar, he apparently signed today for it. His empire is expanding"

"Ok I'll see you there, text me the address again will you, I should be there around nine." I told him.

Today seemed to be ending better than it started and as I walked in the bar later that night I was stunned by what I saw, Emmett was surrounded by six women I didn't know, his sister Alice and Jasper. The atmosphere was charged and everyone in the place seemed to be in party mode. It was heaving and there must have been about a seventy people in there. It was then I noticed Jasper had put up 'UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT 'signs and there were jugs of beer everywhere.

"Hi Jas, what's going on?" I asked looking round at the room.

"Well as of today this is all mine. I haven't said anything to anyone outside of you and Emmett so everyone who is here tonight, is here because they are a regular, excluding this lot of course" he said pointing to the table Emmett was holding court at." So, there is a lot of beer in the cellar that is very close to its use by date, most I can move to the club, but I thought seeing as I'm closing this place down for a few weeks to renovate it, I'd give the regulars something to remember the place by. It's free draught beer tonight, anything else has to be paid for, but draught beer is on the house."

I looked towards the bar and saw it was covered in pitchers. I strolled over and picked up two to take over to the table where Emmett was. As he saw me walking towards him he stood up and waved me over. It was game day tomorrow so I knew he wouldn't be drinking and it was early to bed tonight.

"Edward my man, come and meet Rosalie and the ladies, they are a riot" he shouted.

I made my way over and he started to throw names at me Bree, Bella, Kate, Irina and Tanya and then he made a show of introducing Rosalie. Interesting because he was quite taken with this one, she had obviously managed to keep his attention for a while now. As I looked round the table I was surprised to see Alice sat with them, she very rarely ventured out with her brother, I think he was a little too boisterous for her. She sat quietly at the end of large semi-circular booth and though she was relaxed and looked happy she seemed very nervous. If I hadn't have been concentrating on why she looked so uncomfortable I would have missed Jasper very quickly putting his hand on her thigh and squeezing it, almost in a calming way, he was…. comforting or re assuring her. The smile that erupted on her face left me in no doubt that Alice and Jasper were ,or were very close to becoming, a couple.

I was so shocked that I actually missed the table as I went to put the pitchers on it. Beer went everywhere, spilling all the way across the table and landing in the laps of the ladies furthest into the booth, unfortunately the ones who couldn't get out the way of it. As everyone scrambled to miss the several pints of beer that was splashing around, more glasses were knocked over and the language and cursing exploded. I rushed to the bar to get some towels and by the time I was back the booth had emptied and everyone was laughing at how much the beer had managed to get them. At least they were laughing because I felt bad about it even if it was an accident. I handed out bar towels and tried to help dry people off but quickly realised that was not a good idea as most of the beer had ended up in their laps and I wasn't sure they would want me hovering around them.

Just as I was concentrating on making sure everyone was ok and not too mad at me,I was knocked sideways by 'the scent'. Mystery woman was here, in the bar, I'd recognise that scent anywhere, I could smell her.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

So close, so close damn those pitchers of beer!

Hope all of you who celebrate it had an amazing thanksgiving and that you have some cash left after the shopping. I can officially announce I have finished my Christmas shopping yeah, now I just have to wrap it all…

To AG and Edlovesme thank you thank you thank you x


	23. Deprivation Chapter 23

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 23

BPOV

It was a long day but Rosalie and I finally agreed to disagree. She wasn't happy about me agreeing to be a front for him, but I was determined to try and help him. He shouldn't have to live a life that was a lie just to maintain a public face so if I could ease things for him I would try. I know I sound like a soppy girlie but for some reason he had really affected me in the short time I'd known him.

At first I thought it was probably because I felt sorry for him, I mean I'm the world's leading expert on an unsatisfactory sex life, but it was nothing compared to feeling like you have to completely ignore or hide what you actually are. Rosalie wasn't so understanding, she said he was probably a pervert that was having the time of his life ogling the other players in the changing room, but as I pointed out, he couldn't really get changed if he was sporting a raging hard on, so he must be controlling his urges in the changing room because it would be noticed if he didn't.

I managed to calm Rosalie and we decided to tell Emmett as much of the truth as we could, without dropping Garrett in it. We could tell him I was dating Garrett and at a push I was happy him knowing that we went to the club together. Emmett didn't need any more details than that and he could vouch for Garrett in the locker room if he needed to. When she finally left me, I was ok, I was at peace with my decision and I had decided to join the club with him. I might as well get some use out of the free membership he was offering; you never know I might even get to meet my mystery man again.

The working week passed by very slowly. Work was challenging but exciting as ever. I knew I had found another star author with a creative writing style and an exciting and darkly erotic story, it was an area we didn't normally cover but this was too good to miss. I knew we would have a massive hit on our hand but it took an awful lot of convincing to sway some of the old Fuddy Duddies on the board. I know I've put my reputation on the line for this author, but that's what makes it interesting, I'd go mad if everything was easy.

Rosalie rang Friday afternoon just as I was getting to an incredibly sensual…. erm no not sensual, a damn right filthy part in the manuscript and for the first time in ages I was actually rubbing my thighs together. I don't know what part was doing it for me, whether it was reading such erotic material at work, or imagining it was me that the bad boy was' fucking hard and without mercy', I loved that description ,in the storeroom of an art gallery they were visiting.

"Hi B, do you have plans tonight?" she asked

"No not really why?"

"Well Emmett has just called, apparently Jasper has bought another bar and we are invited to the 'closing for renovation party' tonight. I am ready to get absolutely slaughtered, I don't know about you, but this week has been total shit. I'm so fed up of dealing with dirty old men who talk to my boobs instead of my face, I swear one of these days I'm going to punch one of them, career be damned"

I couldn't help but laugh because that was so Rosalie. All these years working hard to prove she was more than up to the job and she was quite prepared to give it up just so she could punch some old pervert for looking at what is without a doubt an incredible rack. No getting away from it her girls are magnificent.

"Ok no problem, shall I see you there?"

"Yep I have to work late so I'll shoot home get changed and come straight to you, I'll be there around 8 ish, and I'll text you the address later"

After saying goodbye I quickly texted Garrett to see if he was going to the party as well. He answered saying Emmett had already told him and he would see me there.

We needed to try a little harder at this dating game and if we were going to make it believable he was going to have to put a little bit of effort in. We needed to arrive at places together to at least give the illusion of us being a couple and I made a mental note to talk to him tonight about us. It couldn't all just be about going to the club so he could meet up with Renee.

When I arrived the bar was buzzing, there were loads of people around and I could see the girls were already in the booth at the back, Alice was also here and everyone was sitting around laughing and talking like they hadn't seen each other in ages. Emmett was holding court in centre of the booth; he was having a ball surrounded by all the girls. Alice and Jasper were also there, sitting on the edge very close together. As I walked over I could hear the laughter and Emmett's booming voice, I was really starting to warm to this guy, he made my Rosalie very happy, that was obvious and he was really good with the rest of the girls.

"Hi everyone, everyone ok?" I asked as I stood in front of the booth. Jasper jumped up and offered me his seat but the girls were already shuffling around. As Kate and Irina slipped out to go to the ladies room I shuffled into the back of the booth at the side of Rosalie.

Jasper came back with two huge pitchers of beer and explained it was on the house tonight, so I poured a glass and enjoyed the taste as it slipped down my throat.

"You looked as though you need that" Tanya laughed as she filled my glass again.

"I haven't had chance to talk to you since we all stayed at yours, did you manage to sort out your little problem?" she asked quietly.

I looked at Rose because we were so focused on what to tell Emmett we hadn't given any thought about what to tell the girls. Rosalie shook her head slightly, so I took that to mean don't say anything here,

"I had a great date it was very enlightening". It was the best I could come up with.

As Jasper sat back down the space got rather squashed up around the table, but it was fun. The beer was flowing and we were having a great time. Just as I reached for my glass again my eyes were drawn to a guy walking towards us. He was without doubt the most gorgeous man I had ever seen. He had the most incredible bronze hair and I think green eyes, they were so striking. He was tall, I guessed over six foot and dressed like a lawyer or a business man trying to do casual, he definitely wasn't one of Emmett's team mates, they didn't look that good based on the ones I'd already met. He spoke to Jasper first and I think he was telling him about the bar but the place was so noisy I couldn't really hear their conversation.

"Edward my man, come and meet my Rosalie and the ladies, they are a riot" Emmett shouted.

So he was called Edward, I'm sure I had heard Emmett mention him before but this was first time I'd seen him in the flesh. He was fuck hot, no other way to describe him. I watched as he went to the bar and picked up two more pitchers. He moved so gracefully that I was mesmerised by his ass as he walked to the bar and then tried not to stare obviously at his package when he came back towards us. I could feel myself blushing; I would be so embarrassed if someone caught me but I couldn't help it, it was as if I was being called to by his dick.

As he got to the table Emmett started reeling off all our names, but Edward seemed to be entranced by Alice. I guess he didn't know about her and Jasper either, it was obvious they hadn't told Emmett yet either. As I looked at Alice she was gazing at Jasper and she had the biggest smile on her face, how anyone couldn't see they were in love was beyond me, it was like a halo was around them both, flashing on and off. As Edward looked at Alice again he completely missed the table and the pitchers of beer spilled straight across the table top. I watched in horror as the amber liquid spread and because I was in the direct line of fire most of it ended up in my lap. Excellent! There was nowhere for me to go to get out of the way so all I could do was grin and bear the cold liquid seeping through my jeans, completely soaking me from my waistband to my thighs.

Everyone scattered from the table allowing me to finally get out as Edward made a poor attempt to right the pitchers and then rushed to the bar to get towels. I was trying to mop up the excess liquid but it was no good I was soaking wet and decided I couldn't stay looking like that. I picked up my bag and after waving at Rosalie I stepped right behind Edward, just brushing his arm slightly as I did so I could get round him to leave. It took all of my will power not to touch him properly, the urge was incredibly strong but I fought it and rushed out. How could I talk to him anyway when I felt and looked like I'd just peed myself even if it was his fault?

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo


	24. Deprivation Chapter 24

Deprivation Chapter 24

EPOV

She is here somewhere I know she is, I can smell her, I'd recognise the scent anywhere because it is one of a kind, and it's a natural mixture of her, her products and her skin. Whoever she was she had been very close to me. I stood very still so I could try and work out where the scent had come from and where it had gone and how I could follow it. I started to turn round to look at the table, but everyone had moved so the beer could be moped up, so I didn't know where they all were.

I stood on a chair and looked round, If my first thought was right Sue or Renee should be here in the bar somewhere. I looked everywhere but there was no sign of either of them, unless of course they were in the ladies. I waited a couple of minutes and still no sign as I watched the girls go in and out. I knew I probably looked stupid stood up here, but it was the easiest way to see over the crowd. Looking round the age range was probably too young for Renee and there was nobody who looked remotely like Sue so I was stumped and back to having absolutely no idea who I was looking for.

"Edward what the fuck are you doing up there?" Emmett shouted.

I jumped down off the chair and all the time I was looking at everyone and taking deep breaths in through my nose. It was gone, the scent was gone and I didn't know where or how. I tried to look round to see if I could spot who was missing from the people who had been around me when I smelt her. I noticed a couple of Rosalie's friends had disappeared from the booth as well as Alice and Jasper, but I hadn't been in the place long enough to notice who else wasn't there. I also hadn't taken enough notice of the names of Rosalie's friends so I couldn't even ask where they had gone. At least I knew now that I wasn't going crazy, that the scent was real and all I had to do now was find it and then her. The rest of the night was a blur as I spent my time sniffing every female, regardless of age, who either walked by or brushed past me. I refused Emmett's offer to sit with him and his new 'friend' so I could lurk in the most awkward place possible. In the end Jasper asked me to move because I was making some of his customers nervous because I'd spent so long standing in the entrance of the corridor to the bathrooms.

I finally made it home after helping Jasper close down the building and get it ready for the building crew that were coming in after the weekend. We got the beer barrels out of the cellar and ready for the truck to pick them up to take to his other bars and we stacked all the tables and chairs in the corner and covered them with cloths and we took everything off the walls. The bar was left as it was for the time being as Jasper was going to come in tomorrow and box up all the spirits so they could go with the barrels. It didn't take long but the place looked bare pretty quickly, we were an efficient pair.

I was filthy, sweaty and tired when I finally made it home, so I jumped in the shower and after a quick wash I went straight to bed. My night was restful and I slept deep, my dreams full of visions of faceless women who wanted to stroke me as they floated past, it was very peaceful, not at all alarming and I couldn't help but notice that most of the women had long mahogany hair. What was that about? Was I thinking about Sue? Whatever I was thinking or dreaming about I had a full night's sleep not waking until well into the morning. My first thought was of her and I was more determined than ever to find her, so the next morning as I sat drinking my coffee on my balcony I came up with a new plan of action. I was going to go back to the club night; it would be exactly a week since I'd been there last time and I was hoping that she was a creature of habit. I had my new membership and I was going to go as much as possible for the next three months. If I went back at the same time and sat in the same place maybe just maybe she would return as well. If not I would start to turn up at random times and just hang out there, maybe I'd find her in the bar. I would become her own personal stalker except I didn't know who she was.

I didn't have anything to do today for once, my club was running smoothly without me, I only needed to go there once a week to sign anything my manager needed, the new club was coming along great and Charlie was off this weekend so there was nothing happening there. Emmett was playing an away game, but was still quite close by and would be back at Jasper's club by 10.00pm. Jasper was spending the day at his new bar, I'd offered to help but he had turned me down, I think he was probably spending the day with Alice, but I would tackle him about that at a later date.

So I had a day to myself, I knew I should go and see my parents Edward Senior and Elizabeth, but I wasn't in the mood to be lectured about how I was letting them down because I didn't go to the county club every Sunday for brunch or I didn't have a nice girl on my arm. I was also a disappointment because I hadn't joined the family business and there was no one to carry on the long line of lawyers. It was your typical old money thing, Great Great grandfather, Great grandfather, etc. had all been lawyers until I came along, but I just had no interest in that what so ever so there was no point me even trying to keep the line going. I was lucky that my grandfather was an amazing man; he recognised that I wasn't lawyer material and set me on the path of my business degree. Whilst it caused trouble between him and my father, he put me first, something I don't think my father was capable of doing. The family money came through both sides though, my mother was also from 'old' money so as each generation passed on, the money had rolled on as well. Luckily no one had been a gambler or a rogue so I had benefitted from both families on my twenty first birthday.

I called my mother to at least try and be the dutiful son, but after ten minutes of listening to country club gossip I'd had enough. To get her off the phone I agreed to meet her in a little Tea Shop downtown she loved, later in the day. I made an excuse and got off the phone and after making another cup of my favourite coffee I settled outside once more in the sun on the balcony. It was days like this when I wondered if I could be in a proper grown up relationship, sharing my day with someone special instead of sitting here wondering what to do. I could be having breakfast in bed, we could plan spending the day doing nothing together. Don't get me wrong I'm not quite sure what other than the obvious we could do, but I could learn couldn't I? Just because I'd never done it before didn't mean that it was beyond my reach but was I ever going to find someone special enough to make me want to share those things with them?

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

So he really is getting tired of being a man whore.

As ever thanks to AG and Edlovesme I couldn't do this without you x


	25. Deprivation Chapter 25

Deprivation Chapter 25

BPOV

I had trouble getting a cab, who wants to pick up a fare when they look like they had already wet themselves? Eventually a cab driver took pity on me and after making a big show of putting a piece of plastic he had in the cab on the seat, he proceeded to lecture me all the way home about young women getting so drunk they couldn't look after themselves. I didn't have the heart or the energy to explain what had happened so I just took it. He really had my best interest at heart, he explained because he had daughters about my age. I wanted to ask why he had plastic sheeting in his cab but I really didn't want to know what it had been used for before!

By the time I got home I was completely miserable, the buzz from the start of the evening had worn off and all I wanted to do was peel off my sticky smelly wet cloths and dive in the shower.

The water was hot and I finally didn't smell like I had a microbrewery in my pants. I took time washing my hair with the specially formulated shampoo I treated myself to, it was rich and luxurious and the strawberry smell was wonderful. I could smell it all the time, especially when I moved my head and shook my hair. My body wash was made by the same small company, they specialised in organic and natural products and after trying a few different samples I'd settled on a wonderful set that consisted of the body wash, scrub and body butter. They were coconut and strawberry based and made my skin feel incredible. Growing up I'd suffered like any other teenager, but these products had worked wonders on my tired dry skin. I had also managed to find a spa that used the products aswel so I could stock up every time I went for my regular waxing session.

As I ran my hands over my body with the exfoliating body scrub I was happy with what I felt, my skin was smooth and soft and I had a proper shape. I was never going to be a size zero and really didn't want to be. I loved having boobs and hips and that I filled out my clothes, there was definitely far too much emphasis put on young women to be stick thin. As my body responded to the feeling of my hands I was amazed to realise I actually felt horny, this was a rare occurrence, but it had happened before, usually I would just hope that 'PETE' my favourite vibrator would be able to rouse something, but I was feeling brave, so I moved my fingers down to my clit. I knew what I was supposed to do, I knew that the friction on my clit, whether from my fingers or someone else's, should make the feelings build until I had an orgasm, but I'd had so many false starts and dismal results that I very rarely tried anymore, relying solely on 'PETE'.

Determined to at least have a go I put on foot up on the shower bench and moved around so I was facing the taps on my tub. I was lucky that I had a big tub in my bathroom with a shower head over it but it also had a detachable showerhead attached to the taps. In the manuscript I'd been reading earlier her lover had tied her hands to the taps in her tub and after opening her legs, tied those to the feet on her posh tub. He'd then taken the showerhead and brought her to orgasm by putting the direct jet of water against her clit and all around her entrance. It worked for her so why not for me?

I was going to have ago, so standing very still I started to explore just how it felt to have the jet of water hit my nether regions. I ran the warm water all over my body, working my way down to my clit, I pulled back my hood so I could expose that redundant little button to a jet of water and I was pleasantly surprised. The tingling started almost instantly and as I moved the showerhead fractionally to cover my clit and the entrance to my vag I could actually feel my stomach muscles start to tighten, I was getting excited, this was the first time I'd used the showerhead and if the initial results were anything to go by this was going to be big. I started to touch my boobs, my nipples were hard, whether that was my excitement or the fact I was getting cold from not having the water on my body I wasn't sure so I quickly turned and ducked back under the main showerhead. I warmed up the rest of my body but I cut the contact to my clit and everything that was building died instantly, and as much as I tried didn't return. I was left with a tepid shower and aching stomach muscles as my body came down from its near miss.

I went to bed that night frustrated, horny, angry and miserable and determined to go back to the club to see if my mystery man was there again. I'd felt so empowered after my last visit, if I could reclaim my love of blowjobs, then maybe just maybe I could learn the art of orgasms. Alright so I didn't know who he was, or what he looked like but he had offered to reciprocate and even I'll admit to how desperate I'm getting.

The following morning was taken up with my usual weekend chores, laundry, cleaning the apartment, grocery shopping, and my weekly call to my parents before meeting up with Bree, depending on if any of her mums to be were actually in labour. Today though was a good day, she was clear at the moment so we met in the little English Tea Room just round the corner from the hospital. I was the first to arrive and as I took a seat at our usual table and waited for her. She arrived about ten minutes later, closely followed by Rosalie and Alice who had been shopping together in town. Rosalie knew if we were anywhere we'd be here so they had dropped in on the off chance we were here. It was lovely to see Rosalie and Alice getting along so well, I had a feeling that they would be family in the future so they may as well get close now.

We ordered sandwiches and pastries and a pot of tea and coffee and sat catching up for about half an hour. Eventually the conversation turned to the topic I'd been dreading, while Rosalie knew the full truth about what had happened on my 'date', the rest of the girls didn't. I had been very careful to avoid all attempts to find out what happened, I really didn't want to lie to my friends, so I'd decided to say nothing.

Bree was not letting it go though "Come on Bella was it really good, did it live up to all the hype Emmett gave it?"

"It was interesting, but in the end I didn't have sex with him, we just didn't have that instant connection, but we are going to try dating, so I will be seeing him again, you never know what will happen" It was the closest I could get without lying.

Just as Rosalie started to try and help me out my phone rang…..it was Garrett,

"Speak of the devil ladies" I said holding up my finger to shush them.

"Hi Garrett, how are you?"

"I'm fine Bella, how would you like to go out tonight? We could have some dinner and then go to the club. Renee is working tonight so I want to go and meet her. I know some of the team are planning to go tonight so I need your help please" he explained

"Ok Garrett do you want to pick me up or should I meet you somewhere?" I asked

"Erm…. I know it's not very gentlemanly but could you meet me at the restaurant because I will be going home with Renee." He at least had that decency to sound embarrassed. Remind me again why I agreed to this farce. Oh yes the club and my mystery man.

"No worries I'll see you at La Trattoria at 8.30pm" I said as I hung up the phone.

"Well there you go ladies, I'm off out tonight with the lovely Garrett" I tried to inject some enthusiasm into my voice but I could see the scowl on Rosalie's face, she wasn't happy.

"You know we should introduce you to Edward, Emmett's friend. He is lovely just a little bit misunderstood and I could really see you together" Alice said as she helped herself to another pastry. She was the same build as Bree, small and petite, but she could also put away the cake.

"I'll meet Edward when you finally come out and admit to Emmett you are seeing Japer" I joked.

"Well we are going to have to tell him soon, he has asked me to marry him and I've said yes" she said very matter of fact.

The table went silent and Rosalie grabbed Alice's left hand to look for her ring. Alice laughed "I could hardly wear a diamond when we haven't spoken to my family or Emmett yet" she said as she waved her empty left hand about.

"We are going to tell everyone soon don't worry Rosalie, you won't have to keep the secret for much longer" Alice said as she hugged Rosie.

"Well ladies as much as love your company, I need to go home and get ready for my date" I said as I gathered my bags together. As I walked back towards my apartment I was busy wondering what to wear I needed something stunning but easy to get in and out of, I was going to be naked, but only if mystery man was there.

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So both of them are going back to the club, will he find her ?


	26. Deprivation Chapter 26

Deprivation Chapter 26

EPOV

Well I'm here, sitting at the bar of DESIRE. I know its table service because the barman reminded me yet again as he had to bring a stool out for me, but I don't feel comfortable in one of the big couches by myself, it's much more natural to sit at the bar. I thought I might have a problem avoiding Emmett tonight but it seems he is meeting Rosalie later again.

So it begins. It won't be long before they are picking out crockery and moving in together and I'll only get to see him for an hour or so after work for a beer. To be honest, Jasper is just as bad and when I think about it now he has definitely been missing in action quite a bit for the last few months. I can understand him not saying anything to Emmett as he's a bit over protective when it comes to his sister but after what I saw in the bar I'm convinced he's seeing Alice on the quiet.

I always knew they would both settle down eventually and have been looking for the right woman for a while, not that either of them would come out and admit it, but they have been much less active with random females lately. Emmett was always a player, his first thought when we went into a new bar or club was always about the ladies. I'm the only one out of the three of us who doesn't believe in it, you know; true love, being with someone forever, marriage, monogamy and kids.

I suppose that is why I'm sitting here on my own in a sex club on a Saturday night and they are both spending time elsewhere with someone special. I order another drink and the barman asks if I want a tab, reminding me subtlety that it's not free this visit. As I sit sipping my beer I can't help looking around at all the women who pass through the bar. I've learnt my lesson on trying to smell everyone because I really don't want to be thrown out of here, so I'm sitting back and just watching. It is really incredible the number of people who are here on a normal weekend night and I wonder if this just a regular venue for some people, just a part of who they are. All manner of people, ages, shapes, sizes and for some reason I get the feeling she is here somewhere. I can't explain it but I know she is. I look at my watch and its 10.30pm, a bit earlier than last time, but I can't sit still for much longer so I decide to go and see what is happening in the rest of the club. Who am I trying to kid? I'm going to see if I can smell her anywhere. One whiff of that scent and I'm going into the room, whatever is happening in there.

As I stroll along the corridors, all I can concentrate on is finding her scent, there could have been anything happening in any of the open rooms and I wouldn't have noticed. I was finally standing outside the SENSORY SUITE, so I took a deep breath and opened the door. I made my way into the changing room and looked once again at the long list of do's and don'ts. I'm killing time, I know that, part of me really wants to go in there and just see if she is in there, but the rest of me is worried she won't be and what a let-down that would be.

"This is fucking ridiculous man, sort yourself out" oh now I'm talking to myself now, that is not a good sign.

I quickly get undressed before I change my mind. No what am I thinking? I'm not going to change my mind because what is the worst that could happen? I sit in there like a prat waiting for her and she doesn't show and I get lucky with someone else. As quickly as that thought pops into my head, I throw it out. I'm not here to get lucky with just anyone because I could get that anywhere. I'm here for one reason only...to see if she is.

As I walk into the room I remember to follow the rope around the room until I've passed three knots. This time I'm not alone, there are other people in here. I can hear things are happening and I can smell sex but what I can't smell is strawberry and coconut, so I know she is not here, yet. I keep telling myself to be positive. I sit as close to the female changing room door as I dare, anyone who comes in will have to go past me and it will give me chance to smell them as they do. As the door opens I suddenly realise I've given no real thought to what happens if someone comes onto me in here. How do I say no thank you when I can't speak? I try and rack my brain to remember the rules on the wall in the changing room and I'm sure that I have to pat someone on the shoulder three times if I'm not interested. I suppose that is better than a smack in the teeth for an inappropriate grope.

Luckily who ever came in was looking for something specific because she didn't come past me, so she must have gone the other way, towards an area where you could join in something that was already happening. I relaxed and enjoyed the solitude and the dark, it was just so freeing.

I was brought back into the present when the door next to me opened and I was almost knocked sideward by a blast of my new favourite scent. My dick reacted instantly and was up and twitching before she was even completely through the door. I wanted to get up and reach out to her but I didn't want to scare her so I sat still and waited for her to reach for the rope.

She didn't move though, she was standing just by the door. I could tell she stayed still because I knew her scent would have wafted about with any movement she made. I was dying to just go to her, but I needed her to come to me given she ran out last time. I was sitting on the bench so she could approach me, other than that if she sat down I could then approach her. (Shit this was so confusing, trying to remember all the rules and different scenarios that were allowed).

I held my breath as she finally sat down next to me. I knew she couldn't see me, but she would probably be able to smell me as well and I'd made sure to put on aftershave this time. I took a deep breath, just to make sure, and then I stood up and moved in front of her.

Now I was here in front of her I was so fucking nervous. My dick had other thoughts though and was actually reaching for her, pointing directly toward her like a magnetic pull. I leant forward to touch the top of her arm and I slowly traced all the way down it until I held her hand. Then I raised it to my mouth so I could kiss her fingers again. I really hoped she remembered I'd done that last week and from the gasp that came from her I think she did.

Once my lips were on her skin I couldn't stop kissing her. This was a totally new sensation for me, I never kissed my 'partners' and usually I was behind them so I didn't have to even look at them.

I kissed and nipped all the way up her arm and onto her collarbone, her skin was like silk, so smooth, and that combined with her scent was so intoxicating that I was having trouble concentrating. I wanted to throw her down on the bench and fuck her stupid, but at the same time I wanted to take my time in a huge old big bed where I could explore every inch of her. As I get my head back in the game I start to work my way across the bottom of her throat and across the other collarbone. I'm glad I can feel skin and not just sharp bone, she has curves, I know she does and I'm going to find out shortly as I make my way down her body. First though I have to worship her boobs, I need to get those nipples back where they belong and my mouth waters as I think about it. I take a big swallow of air and encase her nipple with my lips.

I suckle and nuzzle like a new born baby, I really can't get enough of her breast into my mouth. I lick and nip and suck and pull on her nipple until it's so hard I'm frightened I'm hurting her. She hasn't made a sound, I know she is not supposed to in here to but a sigh or a groan would be helpful. As I move to worship her other nipple I can feel her arm is raised and as I drag my hand along it I realise she has her hand over her mouth. That makes me smile and I up my game, I'm definitely affecting her, so I start to work her other nipple. It reacts exactly the same and as I back away I can't help but take hold of both of her nipples and start to tweak and pull them. I can hear her moaning now so I move back in to kiss them because I'm going to venture downwards, she was happy giving me a blowjob, let's hope she is ok with me returning the favour so to speak.

I start to kiss across her boobs and slowly move to concentrate my efforts between them. I know if Emmett was in this position he'd definitely want to motor boat them but I don't want to do anything that spooks her so I start to gently kiss all the way down her stomach. I bring my hands up and place them on her waist so I can feel her skin, and in response to that she brings her hands onto my arms and there it is, the tingle and the warmth. I was starting to panic because I hadn't felt it, but obviously the trigger is when she has her hands on me. I couldn't help but groan, I loved the feeling of my skin reacting to her touch, the goose bumps were back and it just emphasised my need to consume this woman.

I moved my hands and grabbed the top of her thighs so I could pull her forward a little and open her legs at the same time. As soon as I did that I was hit with another wave of her scent her arousal, she smelt so enticing like she was made just for me. My patience left me and I just couldn't wait any longer to taste her. I kissed her stomach and with each new kiss I moved a little further down, I was giving her enough notice where I was heading and she wasn't stopping me so I kept going, with each kiss I was waiting to hit pubic hair but there was nothing because shit, she was completely bare.

I never really did oral sex, it wasn't a good fit with alley sex, and as I never took women home it happened very rarely. Another big no no for me was someone who didn't look after themselves down there, nothing worse than having to fight your way through a forest to find the secret entrance. So to feel that she was completely bare was definitely a big turn on, not that I needed anymore encouragement. I stopped right above her clit and kissed her, asking for permission to dive in. She responded instantly, opening her legs just a little wider, so I took my first taste, a great big lick from as far back as I could reach, right up to her mound. My tongue exploded with the taste, it was spicy and sweet and it just sat on my taste buds, I don't think I was ever going to be able to taste anything else ever again. I was completely lost, I just needed to taste her over and over so I set about teasing and licking and kissing her from her clit to as far round as she would let me go. I finally bought my hand up to her mound and I very gently pulled he clit hood back so I could expose her little bundle of nerves. I was just about to suck it into my mouth when she stopped me, I just froze , no please don't make me stop, not now, I chanted to myself.

I backed away from her. I really didn't want to go too far and make her run, because I thought she was as into this as much as I was, let's face it she came back didn't she? I was about to sit upright when her hand suddenly flew to the back of my head and pushed me back to where I'd just been, I grinned, breathing out a huge sigh of relief as I kissed her puffy lips and plunged my tongue as deep inside her as I could reach.

Her body tensed almost immediately, I felt her pussy walls try and clamp my tongue as both of her hands came up and grabbed a handful of hair. As she started to come she pulled on my hair again and it was the first time anyone had ever done that and I fucking loved it, my dick was ready to explode and I hadn't even been touched really. I pushed my finger into her pussy and started to stroke around the top wall of her pussy, I could feel how wet she was, how much I was affecting her so I moved my tongue to her clit and gently bit down and then pulled on it gently.

She came so hard she literally squirted all over my face and it was fucking amazing. I tried to swallow as much as possible and I kept licking and lapping at her pussy just to make sure I didn't miss any. I wondered if she was able to come again and as I decided to see if she was up for it she jumped up and pushed me away.

"I'm so sorry, I don't know how that happened, I'm so sorry, sorry" she whispered as she made her way towards the exit door and then she was gone.

I was still on my knees, my face still wet with her juices. What the fuck just happened?

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	27. Deprivation Chapter 27

Deprivation Chapter 27

BPOV

It was difficult getting ready for my 'date' because what do you wear to go to dinner with someone who you have to pretend to be dating, but then be dressed up enough to go to the club afterwards? In the end I just dressed for the club, let's be honest Garrett wasn't going to even notice what I was wearing anyway.

I settled on my favourite cream and sage dress with some safe black heels, safe because I knew I could walk in them. After my shower and general check that my waxing was still up to date, I slipped on a pair of black lace panties and sat to do my hair and make-up. I kept it light because that was me, I didn't really like the feel of too much on my face. I slipped on my dress but no bra because I was feeling adventurous, some hold ups and my shoes. I was ready; picking up my small bag I added my id, phone, keys and cash and checked to make sure everything was turned off. The restaurant was a few blocks away, so I called down to the desk and asked Clive the doorman to order me a cab. I really needed a coat or jacket but I didn't want to be lumbered with it later on so I was brave and I just went downstairs to go without it and meet Garrett.

The restaurant and food were exceptional, the company though was questionable. God, he was so boring just talking just about himself or him and Renee because I really needed to hear that didn't I? He explained that they had started an exclusive relationship and that while Renee was going to continue working at the club he wasn't going to indulge anymore. They were also planning on moving in together. This shocked me so much I actually choked on my spaghetti.

"Are you sure, I mean you only met a week ago, how much time have you actually spent with him? I asked.

"We have been together nearly every moment of our spare time, I've seen her everyday even if it was only for a few hours"

It didn't escape my notice that Garrett still referred to Renee as she. That just completely confused me, if he was gay why did he think of her as a she? The question was obviously written across my face because he dropped his fork on the plate and sat up away from the table.

"Please don't judge me Izzy. I have spent most of my adult life trying to deal with who I am, at least Renee knows what she wants and who she is. She wants to live her life as a woman and I'm happy for her to do that"

Well that put me in my place didn't it? There wasn't really much conversation after that because I just didn't know what to say to him. If this had a been a real second date, about now I would have been slipping off to the ladies room so I could speak to Rosalie and get her to call me back in about ten minutes. We had a pretty slick routine worked out that we had both used, her far more than me to be honest.

I couldn't leave though as we were going onto the club together so I had another glass of wine and decided to treat myself to desert, a large helping of creamy tiramisu even though I thought I'd be questioning my decision later. As Garrett ordered us coffee I let out a huge belch that caught me totally by surprise, I was mortified and as I tried to apologise he actually laughed and it seemed to break down the stiff atmosphere between up. After that we both relaxed and as we sat sipping our coffee he actually turned into quite a nice human being. We had a giggle about our first visit to the club and then he told me stories about Emmett and what happened in the locker room. I was actually enjoying myself and it wasn't until he asked for the bill and his coat that I was reminded where we were going next.

I was nervous, there was no doubt about that, I wanted to go because I was curious about my mystery man but at the same time I was really disgusted with myself, how could I let an anonymous man just touch me, he at least needed to buy me dinner first surely?! Only joking, honestly.

I sat in the passenger seat of Garrett's Porsche as we sped towards the club and he asked me what I was going to do in there or if I was leaving as soon as we figured out if any of his teammates were in. The plan was that Renee would check who was in and depending on what they were doing, and who they were doing it with, would inform Garrett as soon as we got there. He'd then decide if he needed me to be there, or not.

"I'm not sure what I'm going to do, it seems a shame to have the membership and not use it, I might have a wander around and see if anything takes my fancy." I told him, it was only then I realised I'd never discussed with him what I'd done when we came here before.

We pulled up at the club and Renee was waiting for us by the door. By the look on her face she wasn't happy about something and my guess was that it was because we had gone out for dinner. She leapt on Garrett as soon as he was in the door and her kiss was very territorial. Yep she wasn't happy about him spending time with me. I tried to play nice and said hello, but she just nodded and went back to groping Garrett, someone was very insecure indeed. I moved through the foyer and into the bar, I needed a top up if I was going to get through this night. My stool was at the bar again and I slipped onto it and ordered a glass of wine. I looked at my watch it was just after 10.30pm, we were a little earlier tonight.

Garrett came up beside me and whispered that there were three of his team mates in the club but that they were all here separately and doing things they wouldn't want other people to know about, so he felt ok to relax a little. We sat on the couch and had a drink until Renee came into the bar to fetch him. He kissed me gently on the cheek and said he'd talk to me in the week and off he went.

So here I was, alone in a sex club on a Saturday night so what did I fancy trying? There was plenty to go at, who was I kidding, all I wanted to do was go back to the dark room and see if he was there. I can honestly say I hadn't given him too much thought over the past week because what was there to think about really? The feel of his dick in my throat was about it. It was amazing though, the way he tasted on my lips, the feel of him flooding my throat and I definitely liked the way he kissed my hand. Maybe I'm an old fashioned girl more than I realise. I shuddered and for once I felt moisture between my thighs, it was now or never so I quickly drank my wine and made my way out of the bar. My destination was inevitable and I was naked and standing by the final door to the sensory room within about five minutes, so after a huge steadying breath I opened the door and stepped in.

It took me a few seconds to acclimatise to the complete darkness, but I was determined to see this through, I took a step forward and felt for the rope on the wall. I didn't want to go too far in to the room and I knew if I wanted a man to approach me I needed to stay near in the area near the changing room door. As soon as I had the rope I took a few steps forward and felt for the bench. As I sat down I was met with a lovely smell, somebody was wearing an understated but probably expensive aftershave, yes I was sure it was aftershave, it was too masculine to have been a perfume.

I leaned back and took another steadying breath, my mystery man wasn't wearing aftershave last time, so chances were this wasn't him, but really what were the chances of him even being here anyway? I was going to see this through though.

I was startled when fingertips brushed against the top of my arm and I realised someone was probably stood in front of me. The darkness really was quite dis-orientating. The fingertips moved steadily down my arm until his hand grabbed mine and stared to lift it. I wasn't ready to touch anything yet, so if he was going to put it on his dick straight away he was going to get a big shock when I junk punched him. My arm was still being raised though and I froze when I felt kisses across my knuckles, they were very soft but definitely individual kisses on every knuckle. I let out a quiet gasp, it was my mystery man after all because he did this last week and how many men would introduce themselves in a darkened room like that? I relaxed just slightly and enjoyed the feel of his lips as he worked his way up my am, along my shoulder, straight across the base of my throat and across the other shoulder. His kisses were very light and then every so often he would nip at the skin and I knew he was marking me and as his tongue worked across the base of my throat I could feel my pulse racing, I knew he could probably feel as well because he seemed to linger over my pulse point and pay extra attention.

I'm sitting here on a bench in a dark room and the feeling he is conjuring from me is almost overwhelming, I have never been this turned on ever and can actually feel bubbles of desire exploding on the edge of my pussy lips as my juices make a dash for freedom. Mystery man changes direction and he starts to suck my left nipple so to stop myself crying out I have to cover my mouth, and at this point I'm seriously thinking of actually biting the side of my hand to give me something to concentrate on. A sharp nip as his teeth pull on my nipple brings me back into the present and I have to bite down on my hand to stop my groans. How the hell am I going to cope with all these feelings if he does anything else? Is this normal? Or is this guy a Sex God? I'm so far past the usual dull sensations I experience, my stomach muscles are having a work out I'd be proud of at the gym and my pussy is leaking like an old tap. Maybe tonight is the night and I might actually have an orgasm after all.

That thought scared me and I nearly bolted, but he was kissing his way down my stomach which gave me a minute to catch my breath. I could cope with this, his gentle exploration of my skin with his lips and tongue was lovely and safe. His hands had moved to my waist so I tentatively placed my hands on his arms and the tingling was instant. I'd forgotten about this, it happened last week as well, as soon as I put my hands on him I felt a tingling sensation run straight from my fingertips all the way to my brain and then down every nerve ending until it reached my pussy. It was as though I could map the path, point out which set of nerves were being fired up. I could feel the goose bumps on his skin so I was affecting him as well, I wonder if he felt the tingle too or whether it registered differently for him? I wanted to run my hands up and down his arms but he moved them again before I could do anything. His hands fell to my thighs and he gently pulled me towards him and opened them slightly.

He was kissing my stomach again but this time he was much lower, I'm not totally stupid and inexperienced I knew where he was heading and what he was going to do, so when he stopped kissing me just at the very top of slit I knew I needed to make a decision. To be honest it was such an easy one to make and I opened my legs fractionally wider to encourage him to dive in. If he could even manage to raise a smile down there, then tonight was going to end on an amazing high but in fact I'd probably settle for a lopsided grin at this point given how I was already feeling.

He caught me slightly off guard as my mind wandered, his first lick which I was expecting to be a light exploratory lick to see if I tasted ok, was in fact a huge flat tongued lick from as far back as he could reach right round to my clit. Why would he want to lick that bit? I mean that's just nasty isn't it? Before I could even process that though, he did it again and again so it obviously didn't bother him. The sensations were out of this world, I'd never felt anything like this, in fact I didn't realise you could feel things like this. I suddenly understood the saying you can't miss what you've never had, because if I'd have known it could feel this good, I'd have been, well let's just say my past partners would not have been a very pathetic three in number.

He was still busy kissing, licking and nipping my pussy lips, this guy definitely liked to nip, and for the first time ever I was getting a little scared about the feelings that were building up. What the hell was going to happen because they certainly couldn't just keep building? When I had my orgasms with PETE it was a gentle build up followed by a slight throb in my clit as I came but this wasn't going to be the same. I panicked and pushed him away from me, needing a few seconds to just get my breath.

Thing is - did I want to spend the rest of my life never having a proper orgasm or was I going to go for it here and now and see what could happen? It really wasn't that much of a decision and I hoped he hadn't lost interest so I felt for his head and pushed him back down. As his lips came into contact with mine I swear I could feel them grin, he sighed, probably in frustration at my indecision so I grabbed his hair in my hands and tried to press myself against his mouth. His reaction was just what I needed because he kissed my pussy lips and then plunged his tongue in as far as it would go. This set off a chain reaction that I was no longer in control of.

As he fucked me with his tongue I was well aware I could do nothing to stop whatever was going to happen and I just clung onto his hair with all my might. He pushed his finger into me for the first time and as he removed his tongue I could actually feel him stroking me inside, it was almost painful as he just rubbed circles on my inner wall. I could probably have coped with that but he had to push it further, he pulled back the hood over my clit and sucked my clit into his mouth scraping it on his teeth, the feeling of this and his finger stroking me was too much and as I bucked against him he bit down on me. The pain and pleasure mixed together and for a second I wasn't sure what was happening, everything seemed to release at the same time, I didn't see stars, it was more fireworks and dancing butterflies, how cliché and slightly strange, but my body was struggling to cope with everything that I was feeling and experiencing, that's when it happened. I exploded, I literally felt everything let go and I peed on him, I couldn't believe it, I have my first all singing all dancing, fucking fantastic orgasm and I ruin it by peeing on him. Worst thing was I couldn't stop it either, my body was expelling it in spurts all over the poor guys face. I was mortified how the hell was I supposed to explain this. Not knowing what else to do I jumped up away from him, thank fuck this was all anonymous. How embarrassing would that have been with a person you knew and potentially loved?

"I'm so sorry, I don't know how that happened, I'm so sorry, sorry" I whispered as I pushed away from him and ran to the exit door that I knew was on my left. It was easy to follow the rope and within seconds I was safely in the changing room.

I wiped myself down and got dressed quickly. I was out of the changing room and running along the corridors in minutes and didn't stop until I was in the foyer. The doorman called me a cab and I was soon settled in the back seat of a taxi heading home. I managed to hold myself together until I was safely inside my apartment where I sat on the hallway floor and cried because how could I have ruined what was probably the most exquisite feeling I 'd ever had?

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Don't be mad with her, she really has no idea what happened….

To AG see you later and to Edlovesme I send you the next instalment shortly.x


	28. Deprivation Chapter 28

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 28

EPOV

I stayed on my knees for probably a good couple of minutes, I could still feel her juices all over my chin and cheeks so I brought my hands up to wipe my face. I smelt of her everywhere, my hands, face, and my fingers, everything. I couldn't work out what I'd done wrong; one minute I was revelling in the feeling of her coming, exploding was probably a better description and then the next thing she was leaving me…. again.

Finally I got up and made my way back to the changing room. I wasn't even going to bother trying to stop her this time, she obviously wasn't interested in meeting me outside of here, well to be honest I wasn't even sure what she was even doing in this room. As I sat naked in the changing room, my dick now shrivelled up and in hiding I made a decision, I needed to get laid. It had been weeks since my last alley visit and seeing as I was here I might as well make use of the facilities.

With that in mind I went and had a quick shower because I needed to get her scent off me, and as soon as I was dry I went back into the room but this time I made sure I was nearer the centre so if she did by any chance come back I wouldn't be the first person she encountered. I sat on the bench and waited ….

Sitting on my balcony the next morning, drinking my first cup of coffee of the day, I looked out over the neighbourhood. It was a lovely day far too nice to be sitting around. I quickly got changed and once my trainers were securely tied I set off to run in the park. My iPod was flooding my brain with my running playlist which meant I was able to just run. My mind was blank no thinking about her, no thinking about the disaster that happened after she left which incidentally I blame her for because if she hadn't run off like that I wouldn't have been in the room later on my own looking to get laid. I physically shuddered as I tried not to recall the events of the previous night. It was bad enough that she had run out on me again, but the fact I couldn't even get it up later when I had the opportunity to was just infuriating.

I knew someone new had come into the room, she was confident and knew where she was going, no fumbling for the rope or stumbling in the dark. She walked along the bench and stopped because she could tell someone was close by. It was a very strange experience, very different, she knew what she wanted and slid her hand up my thigh within seconds of placing it there. When it didn't slow down I knew she was going straight for my dick and I took in a deep lung full of oxygen and held my breath. She took this as encouragement and grabbed my dick tightly. I could hear her disappointed sigh when she realised I wasn't hard. She started to move her palm up and down but all I could think was that the scent was all wrong, I couldn't smell strawberries or coconut. I breathed out slowly and tried to focus on her hand, she was good at was she was doing, she had all the moves and was trying most of them. There was a little tug every so often, a swipe over the head and then she would run her finger under the head. Trouble was no matter what she did, nothing, no twitching, no jerky movements, definitely no swelling. After a few minutes she squeezed me again and with a sigh let go and stood up. I felt her step round me and move into the middle of the room, seconds later I heard a very high pitched moan and I wasn't sure whether she was giving or receiving, but at least she would get some form of release tonight.

So that's how I find myself trying to run my frustration away, I haven't had sex in a couple of weeks and I can tell, usually when I get like this a quick visit to Jasper's club solves all my problems. Perhaps that is the answer I'm looking for?

I call Jasper as soon as I'm out of the shower to see if he is around tonight. He tells me he is as he's working so I arrange to see him later. Emmett on the other hand is away on some sort of team building handholding trip these 'athletes' get to go on all the time. Personally I'm sure that after listening to his stories it sounds more like a break from the families and girlfriends so they can let some tension and stress out. It will be interesting this time to see what mischief he gets up to, or whether his new woman has got him by the balls.

The rest of the day I just chill, I catch up on some admin, pay some bills and do a little grocery shopping before finally getting ready to go to Jasper's club. I know a table is always reserved for us and that I don't have to worry about queues or anything so there is no need to rush. I put on a pair of black dress pants that the tailor at my club made for me. They fit me like a glove and I know my ass gets a lot of attention when I wear them. I team it with a slate grey silk shirt which I leave open at the neck and a casual jacket that is the same grey. After splashing on some aftershave I load my pockets, keys, wallet, phone, condoms and some loose change and make my way out front for a cab.

When I get to the club I'm really surprised that the place is so busy, I wave at Felix on the door and make my way up to the VIP balcony to Jaspers private table. The sight that greets me stops me dead. Not only is Jasper sat there with Alice on his lap, but he is also surrounded by several women, this is awkward, while I had guessed about Jasper and Alice actually seeing it was a very different thing.

"Edward finally! Come and meet everyone and help me dilute the oestrogen a bit will you" Jasper joked waving me over. I could tell from the look in his eyes he was worried about my reaction but who was I to judge, if he was happy (and he certainly looked it), then Emmett was just going to have to accept Jasper was what Alice wanted. I took a deep breath and headed their way. Alice jumped off his lap and came barrelling towards me grabbing my arm pulling me to the table.

"Let me introduce you Edward, this is Rosalie, Emmett's girlfriend along with Tanya, Bree and Jane. Down there on the dance floor are Bella, Kate, Irina and Angela. We are having a bit of a celebration for Bella, it's a girlie thing." She said, I wasn't sure what she meant with that but I just smiled and nodded, it was probably safest.

Surprisingly I had a really good night, the girls were funny and intelligent and hell bent on having a good night, not one of them tried to pick me up, but they were friendly and fun. It was obvious they were all close friends and they just wanted a good night out, they were concentrating on drinking and dancing and chatting and laughing and spending time with each other. It was as if they were a self-contained group that didn't need any outside forces to enhance their evening. I spent most of the night with Jasper and Alice, it was obvious they were very much a couple and had been for a while so I just relaxed and had a good night with my friends.

Several times the bodies at the table changed as they would get up and go off and dance to different songs, grab drinks and visit the Ladies room. They all seemed to get on really well, no rivalry or petty jealousy that you can sometimes get within a group of girls. There were blondes, brunettes, even a red head and all of them were head turners in their own right. As the night wore on I couldn't help but keep noticing the small brunette who stayed on the very edge of the group, I 'm sure her name was Bella and she was celebrating something that had happened. I was thinking it might be her birthday and if it was I could use that to go and talk to her, you know offer to buy her some champagne or something so I asked Rosalie.

She just laughed at me though and said that Bella had certainly 'come' of age this weekend. She seemed to exaggerate the word come for some unknown reason. Not wanting to appear stupid I let the remark go but the comment made the rest of the table excluding myself and Jasper collapse in hysterics. I still wasn't quite sure what she was getting at (and she didn't elaborate) so I sat back and just watched Bella from a far.

The more I watched her the more I knew where I'd seen her before because she seemed familiar, but I couldn't place her. I knew she had been at the table when I had spilt the beer, but that wasn't it. I knew her from somewhere else, I just didn't know where from.

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	29. Deprivation Chapter 29

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 29

BPOV

The next morning I was still in shock. I could still feel the after effects of my orgasms and I finally understood what all the fuss was about. Now I knew why Rosalie and Bree were so appalled when I thought it was me. I still wasn't convinced everything worked properly though because surely it wasn't natural to pee when you came? If it was someone would have mentioned it, I mean I knew that all the girls talked about the build-up and the explosion of feeling as their orgasm took hold, but nobody ever talked about peeing.

I need to find out if this was a problem I could fix, because now I knew what I'd been missing I wanted more, lots more, but not until I sorted out my new problem. Rosalie had to be my fist port of call, she would listen to me, laugh and then get serious, and then she would help me.

"Hi Rosalie, what are you doing today?" I didn't bother with niceties, she could tell it was me.

"Well good morning to you Bella. As it happens I'm just about to give Em an amazing blowjob because he has to go off for a few days with the team, and I intend to suck all his sexual tension out of him so he can relax." She told me.

I could hear Emmett in the back ground telling me to go away so his Rosalie could do her duty, and this obviously spurred Rose on so for the next few minutes I was unable to get her attention and therefore was forced to listen in to their foreplay. Eventually she remembered me and I quickly told her to come and see me after Emmett had gone. I definitely didn't need to listen to anymore of that.

I spent the rest of the morning pottering, reading and eventually baking some cookies, just to keep myself occupied. As lunchtime approached I made a platter of sandwiches and a jug of fresh lemonade in case she arrived in time for food but for the time being I couldn't rest. All I could think about was the poor man I'd left behind. He must have been so shocked and disgusted because he went into the room to have a sexual experience and ended up dripping wet, thank goodness it was pitch black and I didn't have to see his face.

She finally turned up about 1.30pm thank goodness. She took a seat and before she could even speak I shoved a glass of lemonade in her hand and passed her a plate.

"Wow!,Slow the fuck down girl, what has happened?" she said as she tried to put the drink and plate on my small table, take off her coat and put her handbag down all at the same time.

I wasn't quite sure how to begin so I delayed saying anything

"Eat first, we'll talk later" was the best I could do.

"No talk now. I'm a big girl with multi-tasking abilities and can eat, talk and listen all at the same time. In fact I've just proved I can breathe through my nose and maybe my ears for long periods of time, especially with my throat full, so you, now" she said as she pushed a sandwich into her mouth.

"So fucking elegant" I murmured as I watched her demolish the food I'd made.

"Get on with it"

I really didn't know what to say so I decided to just go with how the entire evening had gone. I explained about the restaurant, Renee being a jealous ass and finally going back into the sensory room.

"Ok so, I can tell you are keeping something back, I can't help if you don't tell me "she said as she demolished the whole plate of sandwiches.

"It's your helping that has got me into this mess" I snarled at her

"Fuck that Bella, I'll give you the first time but this one is on you so spit it out for fucks sake!"

"Well, I had the most amazing orgasm last night, it was everything I was hoping for and everything you girls told me it would be." I quickly told her

"Well that's fantastic, finally, so what's the problem?" she prodded me. I have to admit she knows me so well.

"Well as I came, I felt this amazing rush and everything just exploded, and I sort of peed all over him" I admitted.

She just stared at me; her mouth was open which wasn't nice, as she was in the middle of chewing a cookie so I leant across and with my finger under her chin I closed it for her.

"That's nasty; I don't need to see that "I shuddered.

"Just explain to me again what happened, and don't leave anything out. I need you to tell me everything" she said as she took a huge gulp of lemonade to clear her mouth. "And find a bottle of wine; I think we are going to need it"

I started to explain meeting at the restaurant but she shut me down.

"I don't give a flying fuck what you had to eat, fast forward to you being on the verge on coming and explain to me what he was doing to you, and I mean everything you can remember."

I looked at her trying to decide if she was getting off listening to me and was just looking for a cheap thrill but no this was my friend, and she was trying to help me understand.

I closed my eyes and placed myself back in the room, trying to visualise what was happening to me but as the room had been in complete darkness that didn't help. My mind took over and I started to tell her …

"He was on his knees I think, in front of me. I had hold of his hair in both of my hands and he had been teasing me for quite a while. I was on the edge of coming and he was rubbing his finger around inside me, and sucking on my clit. He bit down then and pushed his finger further up inside me and I couldn't stop myself and I came all over his face then peed on him, it just sort of spurted out of me, two or three times and I couldn't stop it. So I pushed him away from me, said I sorry and ran out." I managed to say all that without taking a breath, so as soon as I was finished I flopped back onto the couch and took a deep breath. I turned to look at her and she was just staring at me….

"Think very carefully, when you realised you were spurting pee at him, you got up and ran away, were you still spurting pee everywhere or had it stopped?"

I tried hard to think, I'd just run into the changing room, wiped myself on some paper towel, got dressed and run out.

"I must have stopped because I didn't go again until I got home and got ready for bed." I explained

"Oh Bella, Bella, Bella, what am I going to do with you? I really feel I should give you some homework to do; study the female anatomy and what it is capable of. I have never met anyone as naïve and clueless as you are. Let's get this straight ok, you did not pee on him, what happened to you is what is known as female ejaculation. When mystery man was stroking your pussy wall, he actually caused you to come, just like guys do. You are very lucky you know some women never manage it and you succeed the first time you have a proper orgasm."

She patted me on my head like I was six years old and let a huge sigh before starting on me again.

"So how did you leave it with mystery man?"

"I didn't, like I told you I pushed him away and ran into the changing rooms"

"Great so he gives you an amazing orgasm, your first proper one, makes you squirt and you thank him by dumping him. How the hell are you going to fix this?" I think it was a rhetorical question, at least I hoped it was because I had no idea how to answer it.

"You'll have to go back to the club next weekend and hope he is there again and try and talk to him, explain that you are new to all this" she was thinking out loud again I think.

"I can't talk to him, there is no talking in the suite and I'm certainly not saying those things to him in front of anyone else. I'll have to see if I can get him on his own somewhere and try and have a quiet word."

"You have to make this right Bella, if he can make you come like that you need to keep him sweet, you need to be able to meet him at the club when you want, so you can get some relief... you know".

I was unhappy with that thought because I didn't want to just use him to relieve some sexual tension. Now I knew what he could unleash in me I wanted more, I wanted to feel what would happen if we got the opportunity to have sex.

"Anyway enough of the female anatomy lesson, were going out tonight clubbing. Alice and Jasper are going public with their relationship as Emmett is away and we need to celebrate your first proper orgasm so I'll pick you up at 9.00pm. Make sure you are dressed for clubbing Missy, no jeans or I will dress you myself." She said kissing my cheek and heading for the door.

I'm not a fan of clubbing in general but maybe she was right. I could be good, a few drinks and a dance with the girls never hurt anyone.

So on the dot Rosalie turned up and that's how I found myself at Jasper's club on a Sunday night. The place was incredibly busy which surprised me but I guess just because I don't normally go out on a sunday night doesn't mean other people stay home. Jasper had arranged for us to be his guests and we were shown to his private table on the balcony which was great. We drank, laughed and danced every so often returning to the table to chat before returning to the dance floor. Alice and Jasper were out in the open and clearly very much together. She was on his lap and staying there, only moving when Jasper's presence was needed somewhere else in the club. The only person who was still in the dark was Emmett because Jasper had even spoken to Alice's parents, although I'm not sure his reception was all that good from them from what I could gather. I could tell however he really wasn't looking forward to bringing Emmett up to speed; overly protective big brothers and their little sisters, as an only child I don't have that problem.

When I came back to the table to have a drink I couldn't believe my luck, the gorgeous pitcher spilling guy from the bar was sitting talking to Alice and Jasper. I hung back because I really didn't trust myself to be around him, he was too good looking for his own good. As far as everyone here was concerned I was dating Garrett, casually I'll admit, but still, they knew me well enough to know I would never date two guys at once.

What am I thinking? I'm pretending to date Garrett to protect his secret, having orgasms with my mystery man and thinking of that gorgeous ass in a beautifully cut pair of pants, across the table from me talking to Jasper. Oh shit! One real orgasm and I'm insatiable.

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	30. Deprivation Chapter 30

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 30

EPOV

I couldn't help but stare, it was really starting to annoy me, everything about her seemed to scream familiarity but every time I got ready to talk to her she would get up to dance or one of the other girls would monopolise her. The way the seating had been dragged together also meant she was the furthest point away from me. I couldn't talk directly to her she was just too far away , the music drowned out my words before they even reached her.

"You know she doesn't bite, you could go and speak to her" Alice whispered into my ear.

"Is she single?" I asked without taking my eyes off her.

"Well she has recently started seeing one of Emmett's team mates, Garrett I think his name is"

"Garrett, are you sure? I thought he was with someone called Izzy" I asked her.

"I'm not sure, but she has been out with him a few times I think. She doesn't say much about him and it appears he actually meets her at places rather than picking her up or anything". Alice explained, she obviously did not approve of the pairing at all.

I listened to what she was saying. I knew Garrett had been to the club with Izzy on the 'taster evening' and I had heard him boasting a few nights back about Izzy and how she let him do what he wanted at the club. It seemed like he was being a total shit and was seeing both at them at the same time, perhaps Bella during the early evenings and then Izzy later on when he was at the club or maybe alternate nights.

Looking at Bella she seemed very sweet and didn't deserve being treated like that. Perhaps she didn't know about Izzy and the club so maybe he was having the best of both worlds. I could imagine Izzy would know about Bella because if she was happy for Garrett to do what he wanted in the club, she wasn't going to worry about him going out for a drink with someone else. Shit that means he's not only cheating on Bella with Izzy, he's also screwing about at the club. Maybe I should have a word with Emmett and he can decide whether to tell Rosalie or not. I mean she really ought to know what a shit she was dating. I hoped she was being careful, I'd hate to think of her catching something from him.

What the fuck am I thinking? I shake my head to clear it and knock back my scotch. What has it got to do with me who is fucking who? All I really know is that I'm not getting any at all. That thought really depresses me and I decided to go on the hunt. I never have any trouble finding willing bodies here so I should be good to go shortly.

I stood up to leave the table and Alice grabbed my arm "Please don't Edward, you will regret it"

"Regret what?" I asked

"You know, you'll hate yourself afterwards, just hang in there please something big is coming, I know it is" she almost pleaded.

"Don't worry about me Alice; I'm fine I promise. I just need some fun that's all".

I patted her arm and left the table. I did my usual thing, hanging out over the edge of the balcony upstairs before moving downstairs to the edge of the dance floor so I could see who was about and whether they caught my eye or not. I stood for about ten minutes, just watching and waiting. Tonight though lady luck was not on my side, two women approached me and it didn't take me long to realise they wanted a repeat performance. One of my basic rules was that I never went back for seconds; I really didn't want anyone getting attached so before I risked anyone else coming onto me I decided to head back upstairs.

As I sat back down with a new drink it suddenly occurred to me that I'd broken my own rule with the woman at the club. I'd had seconds, indeed I'd gone back there looking for seconds, but then technically I hadn't had sex with her yet, so did just having oral, excellent mind blowing oral at that, really count? I mulled over the idea but realised who was I kidding? I was even planning on going back to see if I could get her to explain what went so wrong last time and convince her to stay next time.

Sitting in the club, the music loud and the chatter even louder I felt completely alone. I was surrounded by all these people but no one special who I could really talk to. Ok, Jasper was always there for me but he had another priority now that was obvious.

"So J when are you going to tell Emmett about this and more importantly how have you managed to keep it so quiet?" I asked him when he came and sat back down with us.

"Well keeping it quiet has been easy. Alice is the one who wanted it that way, we have worked around her studies, Emmett being away with the team and her parents ignorance, which has meant that we have managed to have a proper relationship and we've even been away a couple of weekends away without anyone noticing." He explained

"So you're no longer going to be out with me and Emmett then?" I asked

"Of course I'll still be going out and about with you and the big guy. Think about it Edward, when was the last time you actually saw me pick a woman up?" he looked at me as I tried to think back.

"I haven't been with anyone else for over a year. I'll admit that the odd woman has sat on my knee or I've talked to them up here at the table, but that was mainly to keep Emmett from getting suspicious before we were ready to tell him."

"Thinking about it you haven't no. I suppose Emmett is also off the market as well then because he seems to be totally into Rosalie." I was beginning to sulk a little here it had always been the three of us against the world.

"He is absolutely knocked out by her but hasn't told you because he doesn't think you'll understand" Jasper at least had the decency to look a little ashamed as he admitted what they thought of me.

"Am I really so unfeeling that you and Emmett both think I wouldn't understand you falling in love? I'm happy for you both, that you have found someone you care about like that. I just know I'm not made for that and I don't think I will ever be able to feel it".

At this point the evening had gone flat for me. I just didn't want to be here anymore. It was bad enough having to watch Alice and Jasper so happy, but to know that the only other woman who had made me look twice at her was actually already dating a total dickhead who didn't deserve her.

"I'm going home and I'll see you in a few days. I have lots of meeting so it will probably be towards the end of the week before we can get together" I said to Jasper as I started to leave.

"Don't leave please Edward, I want you to meet Bella properly because I think you two would really hit it off" Alice pleaded as I tried to move away.

"Alice! Bella has enough problems if she is seeing Garrett, the last thing she needs is for you to throw me into the mix. Maybe if she dumps him I'll be interested, but until then I'm staying clear" I told her as I waved good night to the group and left.

I tried to catch Bella's eye but she was dancing with a couple of the other girls on the edge of the dance floor. I watched as they moved and were completely unaware of the men around them adjusting themselves. The wolves were gathering and I really hoped that they could look after themselves.

Later as I stood in my usual spot on my balcony at home I thought about how incredibly lonely I felt. My friends were starting new chapters in their lives with significant others, but I was here alone. Whilst I was deemed a success in business, personally I was such a failure.

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Poor Edward he really is feeling sorry for himself, maybe change is a good thing for him.

Thanks to Edlovesme for coping with my questions and adjusting my Americanisms and to AG who also has to deal with my strange emails at all hours. It not easy answering them when she is walking round farms in wellies !


	31. Deprivation Chapter 31

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 31

BPOV

Well shit, I'd had had the most horrendous week. Everything that could go wrong had. Firstly I'd fallen out with one on my authors because they were having a crisis of confidence. Now I know I should have been all softly, softly stroking their ego and all that shit, but please, I'm almost guaranteeing them a place in the top 20 of the best sellers list and they are worrying about the colour choices on the cover. I mean I could understand if it was a dramatic change but he was having a melt down over two different shades of cream. I also managed to cause friction in the weekly editorial meeting because I refused to back a manuscript everyone else loved. I know what I know and I am still positive that the essence of the story is all wrong, you end feeling sorry for the bad guy and hating our hero and why would anyone want to read that? I totally understand cheering for the underdog, but a nasty piece of work, never. I just have to hold my nerve and stand by what I believe my gut is telling me but only time will tell, I could be wrong.

My personal life hasn't been much better, PETE has been forced to retire injured from over use, and I have to admit I have really over indulged this week trying to recreate the incredible feelings from my last visit to the dark room. I have a large selection of toys but PETE is the only one who ever gets me anywhere near. I had a mini funeral for him, wrapped him in a bandana and said a short prayer to the orgasm gods before I threw him in the trash. Then I had a glass of wine to toast him on his way to wherever.

On top of everything else I have problems with the hot water so I'm sitting here trying to work from home while I wait for the maintenance guy so I can actually have a shower.

I log on to the remote server for work and start trawling through the manuscripts that have been sent to me this week, twenty three so far and realistically only maybe two will make it to the table for discussion. I feel for the authors we can't work with, but we just can't go with everyone. What really pisses me off though is that it's not always the best written most interesting story that makes the grade, it's usually the most marketable or the one that will reach and appeal to the biggest audience. I'm probably one of the biggest supporters of self-publishing, I know that sounds stupid with the job I do but there is so much amazing work out there it should all get read.

Finally at 5.30pm the maintenance guy finally arrives, he's here just 20 minutes, fixes the boiler and leaves $250 better off. I can't believe the cost but at this time of the day on a Friday I just need a hot bath, a glass of wine and to finally make a decision on whether I'm going back to the club or not this weekend. Usually by now I've spoken to Garrett at least once in the week but I haven't heard anything from him. I knew they were away on some sort of training week because he and Emmett weren't at Jasper's club on Sunday night, but I thought he would have been back by now. An hour later I am luxuriating in a very deep, very hot bubble bath with all the girly trimmings. I have candles lit, a glass of wine, music playing and a plate of chocolates and some fruit (to cancel out the chocolate and wine) on the side. After a quick conversation with Rosalie I know the team is back so I decide to take the initiative and call Garrett myself.

"Hi Garrett, it's me Izzy. I was wondering if we were going to the club tomorrow night?" I asked when he answered his phone.

"Erm I'm not sure at the moment, Renee is upset with me for being away and says she doesn't want me there" he admits sheepishly.

"Oh ok well if you make up let me know, I've kept my Saturday night clear just in case" I told him before I hung up.

I called Rosalie to see if she knew what the girls were doing and they were having a sleepover at Irina's, I wasn't in the mood for that, Bree was working and Rosalie was planning a little party of her own as Emmett was back ,so really everyone was busy.

"Why don't you ring Alice? She will be at a loose end tonight because Jasper has to work" she explained.

I was just getting to know Alice and I really liked her and it would be a great way to get to know her better so I called her straight away.

"Hi Alice its Bella, I wondered if you fancied doing something tonight if you are not busy?"

"Hi Bella, I'd love to, thanks for calling. Jasper is working and I really don't fancy sitting alone at that table while he's busy, he worries about me so he won't concentrate on what he needs to get done" she explained.

"What do you fancy? A movie, dancing, a meal?" I ask.

"Let's do something different for a change. How about we go to a show and then if we fancy food later we could grab something at a diner I know?" she was very enthusiastic and she was right to suggest something different so I was happy to agree.

"Just throw on something comfortable, jeans and a sweater, no need to dress up" she said as we arranged to meet at our local diner first.

She was already there when I arrived, we had a quick cup of coffee and a piece of pie and we were catching up on our week when she suddenly put her cup down and let out a sigh.

"Bella I have a confession to make, it's not really a show I'm taking you to it's a bridal fayre, please don't be mad. It'd just I haven't had many girlfriends and you and Rosalie have made me so welcome, would you mind if we went and looked at wedding things?"

I laughed, she had really picked the wrong person to do this with, I didn't have a girlie fashion bone in my body, never mind any idea about flower arrangements or place settings.

"Alice I have no idea what I would be looking at, shouldn't you be doing this with your Mum?"

"I would but she has flatly refused to acknowledge my engagement to Jasper, she says I'm too young and he is all wrong for me" her little face was so sad, I couldn't even begin to turn her down so off we went to the bridal fayre.

In the end we had a really good night, she was so excited about the wedding and slowly coming to terms with the fact she might have to get married without her parents support and presence. Jasper had told her he was prepared to wait, to prove his love for her but Alice was adamant she wanted to get married soon and didn't want to wait.

Later when I was back at home I wondered how it would feel to be in love like that and to want someone so badly you were prepared to turn away from all the advice and wishes of your family. I couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy, I had never been in love I was sure of that now, but would it ever happen for me?

I was surprised when two visions quickly popped into my head. One was my hand being held and my knuckles tenderly kissed, the other a very nice ass walking away from me in black pants. Maybe I should try and get to know Edward. No doubt about it, he was gorgeous, and anyone with an ass that fine couldn't be all bad. I made a decision to see if I could find out anything from Emmett about him because so far he hadn't been very forthcoming about his friend. Maybe he was gay? I hoped not for my sake, no what was I thinking? Perhaps he's attached or not interested in dating? I wouldn't know until I asked so I made it my mission to find out from Emmett the next time I saw him.

Saturday started with an array of calls, my phone was red hot. First Garrett called early to say he and Renee had made up and could I accompany him to the club tonight. Then Bree called to say she was free and could we go shopping. Next Alice called to say thank you for last night and was I up for doing it again soon and finally Rosalie who just wanted to catch up and made plans to meet me up with me and Bree. The day flew by and before I knew it I was getting ready to go back to the club. As ever Garrett had tried to get out of picking me up, but I wasn't having that, I'm doing him a favour, the least he can do is put himself out a little and save me the huge cab fares. When he finally showed he explained that Renee was having a hard time about his arrangement with me and she wanted him to make the time he spent with me as far from date like as possible.

The woman was mad, Garrett was definitely 100% gay, why should she worry about me? Did I say that out loud? I must have because Garrett responded by saying

"She feels like a woman and sees herself as a woman, so in her mind if I'm attracted to her I could be attracted to you. I'm not going to say I understand it but I'm hoping she will calm down and trust me as time goes on" his confession was quite shocking and I suddenly saw huge cracks open up in our future pretend relationship.

"You do know we won't fool anyone if we don't start doing things together soon. We really need to make an appearance together at a team event or people will get suspicious, especially as I am Rosalie's friend and Emmett has already introduced her to everyone." I was trying to be honest with him but he was in a bad predicament at the moment.

"I know but I'm just not sure how to go about it and keep Renee happy. How do I explain taking you to an event and not her" he looked really sad and for a second I felt quite sorry for him.

"Garrett you seem to have a big decision to make, who is more important, your friends or Renee"

"I know Izzy, but she just doesn't want to understand how much it could harm my career" he explained.

"And in her eyes that is probably even worse, you are putting her feelings second to your career, no woman wants to hear that, even though every rational one would understand it" I hoped he wouldn't take offence at the dig at Renee because rational was one thing she wasn't.

We pulled up to the club and she was at the door waiting for us, watching like a Momma Lion protecting her cubs. Scarily, I could feel her claws already digging in to my scalp, the look she was giving me was just plain nasty and it's only because I'm a proper lady that I didn't nut punch her as I walked past.

I had a feeling this would be my last visit to the club either with Garrett or without.

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A quick thank you to all of you who have reviewed, we are quickly approaching 250 and I'm just loving reading them. I do try and respond to everyone so if I've missed you sorry, I'll try and do better.


	32. Deprivation Chapter 32

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 32

EPOV

Well shit I had had the most horrendous week, everything that could go wrong had. Firstly I'd fallen out with Angela, my manager because she had decided she was a feminist and she couldn't work in such a male orientated world anymore so handed in her notice. I tried to explain to her that the fact I'd employed her instead of a man must mean something but for some reason she was too short sighted to see that and walked out. My initial reaction had been that I could do her job but after a few days realised I had to look for a new manager because I'd already had enough. I'd forgotten how much hard work it was to deal with all the little details, day in day out.

Secondly I managed to fall out with Carlisle my architect because he was trying to add these newly released high tech gadgets and over the top extra's into the new place. I couldn't make him understand that a lot of my clientele were old fashioned business men that were trying to escape the rat race and the office. Hell most of them wanted to actually revert to childhood and when we had nursery food day, once a month you couldn't move for grown men eating sausage and mash or macaroni cheese with hot dogs followed by ice cream or a milk pudding. They really weren't interested in having spray tan booths, or full length automatic body driers, they wanted to come in, slob out, turn their phones off and have a scotch.

I also had major problems with my mother. Every so often she decided I needed a wife and she would organise a surprise lunch meeting or ambush me, which ever you cared to call it. This time it had been at her favourite restaurant. She called and asked me to lunch as she just happened to be around the corner from my club. I should have known better and been prepared but I was still shocked when I walked in because she had not one but two women with her. I tried to sneak back out but the maître'd recognised me and he welcomed me by name, causing my mother to turn around.

As I made my way to the table I tried to work out who she had with her, not recognising them I presumed they were newcomers to the country club set. I turned my manners up a notch and tried to work out a game plan to get out of there as soon as possible. Unfortunately my Mother was once again ready for me and in the end I spent an agonising 90 minutes listening to how wonderful the Bennington-Smyth twins were.

I knew that I was stuck here until my mother had a found a way to get me to take one if not both of them out, so I had to think quickly. I finally excused myself to use the restroom and I placed a call to Jasper. I was just praying he wasn't in a meeting or for that matter Alice, as I needed him to rescue me. When he answered I explained the mess I was in and after laughing for a good two minutes he agreed to call me in ten minutes and pretend to be the new temporary manager at the club. Hopefully I could use this as an excuse then to escape.

I sat back down at the table and waited for the call. What I wasn't ready for was the fact the twins had decided on a combined approach at getting my attention. Whilst one of the sisters was busy trying to feel me up,( her hand was rubbing my thigh and trying to get higher) the other was running her bare foot all over my ankle and up my leg. I did just for a second wonder about having them both together, I mean I'd never had twins before, but the second it entered my mind it was replaced by the image of a faceless woman with amazing curves and long dark brown mahogany hair. Shit I really needed to get laid and soon, but not by these two.

Luckily before I could freak out at the vision my phone rang. Jasper the little shit had let me stew for twenty minutes before he called. Twenty minutes of trying to keep Twin A off my zipper and Twin B from getting her foot as far up my pant leg as possible. Why did either of them think it was sexy or a turn on to be mauled at the table sitting opposite my Mother? I shuddered again and excusing myself politely stepped away from the table to take the call. It was a pretty one sided conversation as Jasper just sat laughing at me however I was amazing if I say so myself. I managed to have a complete conversation setting the scene that I needed to leave urgently to sort out a problem.

I went to say goodbye to Mother, I bent forward and kissed her cheek. Catching one side of my face with her hand she whispered "Well done my dear, if I'd have realised they were such whores I would never have bother to introduced them to you. I promise I'll select better next time" and with that I was dismissed and out of the restaurant before she changed her mind.

"You shit, you left me for ages" I ranted at Jasper as I walked back to the club, "you owe me big time now"

"OK OK what do you want?" he asked still laughing.

"Are you working tonight? I need a drink and I suppose Emmett is busy learning how to be under the thumb"

"From what he's been telling me, believe me he is so far under the thumb it's painful. Rosalie not only has him by the balls, she's squeezing them as well, and he is having trouble keeping up"

That cheered me up no end, so we arranged to meet at the club later.

When I arrived there later Jasper was nowhere to be seen, I fully expected Alice to be sitting at his reserved table but she wasn't there either. I did think about going to check his office but if Alice was here I really didn't want to interrupt and witness anything I couldn't forget.

I ordered a drink from the waitress and sat down. It was a while before he finally joined me and when he did he looked like he was having a hell of a day. It seemed this was just a bad week all round. He ordered a drink which he never did when he was working and sat and just closed his eyes. I let him be, knowing when he was ready he'd speak and sure enough within a few minutes he was back with me.

"So what's causing all the stress?" I asked.

"I've just had Alice's parents on the phone, they want me to dump her and walk away because they say at 22 she is too young to get married and that I will ruin the rest of her life"

"Bullshit! You're not going to are you?"

"What the fuck no way! In fact Alice is out with Bella at the moment and they have gone to a Bridal show or something, if it was left to Alice we would elope and get married next weekend " I could see from the look on his face that was a distinct possibility after the conversation he had just had.

"So she is out with Bella is she? I didn't know they were friends" I was trying to be discreet and maybe I could get some info on her.

"Yes they seem to have really hit it off. Alice loves Rosalie and as Bella is Rosalie's best friend they all seem to have accepted her into their group without any question. I'm glad because she is having a real hard time at college, it's her last year and the pressure her parents are putting on her to achieve top grades is incredible. In fact I need to talk to Emmett to see if he can step in where her parents are concerned."

"So you've finally come clean and told Emmett then?" I asked

"Yes and I shouldn't have kept it from him all this time. He was mad at first but once he realised how much I care about Alice and that I've asked her to marry me he gave me a big manly hug and welcomed me to the family, something I didn't get off her father or mother"

I let him talk, he seemed to need to get everything off his chest and lets face it I'm an expert at pushy interfering parents. The selfish side of me however wanted to get back to talking about and finding out about Bella.

"Alice was telling me that Bella is dating one of Emmett's teammates, Gavin is it?"

"No it's Garrett, you know the dickhead that spends the whole time talking about how many women he's got on the go, what he's doing to them and who he's got lined up to move onto. I really don't like him but Emmett says he ok, I've tried to tell Alice to warn Bella"

"Well has she because she really shouldn't be left open to that? God knows what sort of women he's hanging around with. I bet he is also in to the groupies' as well when they are away from home"

Jasper stared at me with a strange look on his face, "Why do you care? You use women all the time, in fact you usually forget to ask their name before you push them up against the alley wall and fuck them from behind"

I couldn't argue with him he knew me too well.

"Well maybe I do care about some people. If Alice likes her that's good enough for me and I agree with you about Garrett he is a grade A prick, I just don't like to stand by and watch people I care about get hurt". The moment I stopped talking I knew I'd said too much, Jasper had that look on his face again and I needed to change the subject, and fast.

"So are we out tomorrow, or are you seeing Alice?"

"I'm seeing Alice. I need to sort out all this crap with her parents and I'm going to ask Emmett and Rosalie to come with me as back up, so I'm afraid my man you're on your own tomorrow."

Well that was my decision made. I was going to the club tomorrow night and maybe just maybe my mystery woman would be there. I hoped so because I really needed a release that didn't involve just me.

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	33. Deprivation Chapter 33

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 33

BPOV

It's amazing how quickly strange and new things become the norm. I sashayed into the club like I owned the place, partly because I wanted to seriously piss Reggie off, (I know I know it probably wasn't Renee's real name but to me she would now always be Reggie) and partly because I felt confident and at ease here. I couldn't even blame the booze, I hadn't had any, I was genuinely happy to be here and excited, I was just hoping mystery man hadn't given up on me.

I had a lot of explaining to do if I got the chance. That was a problem in its self though, I mean how do you start a conversation in the pitch black, to a man you don't know, about the fact you had never squirted before, never mind having no idea a woman was even able to ejaculate? Not really small talk.

Maybe a drink would be a good idea, I moved to the bar and turned to see if Garrett wanted one as well, but I was greeted with the sight of Reggie dragging him off. She was literally pulling him by his tie out of the bar and I had to giggle as I had a vision of Garrett down on all fours being pulled along by a dog lead fastened round his neck. I hope he realised just how territorial Reggie was because sooner or later I could see everything falling apart. No way was Reggie going to be pushed into the background, Garrett was going to have to go public soon about her or I had a feeling Reggie would force it.

I turned to the regular barman and he was already pouring me a Grey Goose.

"You look as though you need this, it's on me, anyone who can wind up Renee as much as you do has to be alright in my book" he said as he placed a large tumbler in front of me.

"You're right I do need this, it's been a hell of a week and he is the last thing I need tonight" I answered as I took a large gulp. The raw alcohol made me shudder, but I felt its warmth as it slowly made its way down my throat and into my stomach, I swear I felt every inch of its path.

I needed to make a decision on how I was going to play tonight. Should I wait in the bar until later and try and spot my mystery man? I might be lucky and see him kiss somebody else's hand, it might well be his standard greeting, as that thought entered my head it depressed me a little, I wanted it to be something he just did for me, our special thing. It was a stupid thought anyway, what were the chances of seeing someone do that here in the bar anyway? My best bet was to go into the suite and wait for him, in the hope he turns up again. With my decision made I ordered another drink, placed it on Garrett's tab, hell why not, it's the least he could do, and after knocking back the remainder of the vodka I made my way upstairs.

The changing room was quiet so I was able to strip off and get myself ready at my own pace, and checking the time I saw I was I a little earlier than we've been in normally, it was only 10.15pm. I was torn now, given we had never been in the room that early, should I go in now in or sit and wait? I sat in the changing room naked trying to decide and came to the conclusion, what the hell if he wasn't in there I could try with someone else. With my newly found confidence wrapped around me like a protective shield I opened the door and walked in.

I settled on the bench and waited for my senses to align, the darkness may have taken my sight completely but my hearing and sense of smell sharpened and took over to compensate. I was alone, of that I was sure, the air was still and calm, I imagined it was like being in one of those water tanks you can go in that are supposed to de stress you, I lay back, stretched out on the bench and just enjoyed the complete isolation.

I understood how some people could find this a bit claustrophobic but I was amazed how calming it was. My crap week, Reggie and his talons, Garrett and his lack of balls, all of it just floated away and I felt calm and relaxed, in fact I was in danger of falling asleep. That was not a good idea, I really didn't want sitting on or someone thinking I was available for anything so I shook myself and sat up. I listened again for sign of anyone else but no still alone. I was curious how long I'd been in the room so I quickly popped my head back into the changing room, it was 11.00pm so I had probably nodded off briefly. I decided I needed a quick freshen up so I splashed some cold water carefully on my neck and face. I only had a minimal amount of make up on so I was ok. The cold water woke me up and made me feel alive again so I took a deep breath and entered the suite once more. I was still alone so maybe tonight wasn't going to be my night after all. I decided to stay a little while longer and got comfortable in the darkness once again. I sat upright on the bench and leaned back against the guide rope running around the room; it gave me an anchor point, a base in the room where there were no visible boundaries.

I guess it was about 10 minutes later when the male changing room door opened. I was torn, I wanted it to be my mystery man so much but I'd come to the decision that if someone else approached me I would try, maybe, and see what effect they had on me.

I waited patiently to see where he went in the room, I mean there was no point getting excited if he was waiting for another man or to join a group activity. He stood by the door and I heard him take a big breath in, it was as if he was trying to take in the aroma of the room, I suppose when the room was full and rocking, the smell of sex would be quite potent, but right now it was just little old me.

He gasped, a strange sound from a man, but a definite gasp, and I felt him move, he was coming towards me. I could feel the tension in the rope as he held it and used it as a guide around the room. For the first time I was pissed off at the darkness, I wanted to see who was here in the suite, I wanted to watch them come towards me. I felt the tension in the rope change as he got close to me and I tried to work out how close he was.

"You're here, after running out on me twice I wasn't sure you would come back again" he said.

For a second I wasn't sure what he meant but he was right I had run out twice, I didn't see the first time as actually running out, but I could see he might. I wanted to talk to him but we weren't supposed to in here and I wasn't ready yet to see him in the bar.

"Well aren't you going to talk to me? We're definitely in here alone so no one will know, I promise to be quiet if someone comes in" he continued

I could hear the humour in his voice, but there was an underlying emotion, he was as nervous as I was and that knowledge calmed me and allowed me to relax.

"I didn't run out the first time that was just me trying to make a dignified exit before my clumsiness took hold. The second time I will admit to but at the time I was so traumatised by what happened I just had to leave." It wasn't the best explanation in the world but it was a start.

"I don't understand what happened to make you feel like that?"

There was no way round this I needed to be honest, he would either be proud he'd made me squirt or he would laugh at my lack of knowledge, maybe both.

"Well I had no idea what was happening when you did what you did. I didn't realise women could do that and If I'm honest I thought I had peed on you." I was so glad it was dark, my cheeks were burning from my blush and I really wanted to run again.

"I can feel the heat from your blush sitting here, but please don't be embarrassed. It's refreshing that you are honest enough to admit that to me."

Well that just about blew me away, out of everything he could have said that was the last thing I expected.

"Erm thank you, I think. I'm not really sure how to respond to that."

"You don't need to say anything, let's just go on from here. Do you want to introduce yourself or do you want this to remain anonymous?"

I'd dreamt about this moment, I'd imagined how we would do it and what we'd say, would I be Bella, Izzy or Isabella? In the end though, I surprised myself.

"Do you mind if for the moment we stay how we are, I call you' my mystery man' in my head and I'm not quite ready to give that up" I explained.

"That's fine for now, so long as you promise me we will revisit this soon, I'm not going to run the risk of you disappearing on me again"

I couldn't help the girly giggle that erupted from me, he was as much into me as I was him.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't laugh, I'm just relieved that you actually want to have anything to do with me, I was so frightened I'd scared you off."

"'I'm here aren't I? And before you ask no I don't come here all the time, I'm here tonight specifically looking for you". As he spoke I felt his hand move to my arm and start to stroke up and down it.

"Do you mind if I touch you? I know it seems a little late to ask that, but now we are talking it takes away a lot of the anonymity and to be honest with you, sitting this close I'm going mad not being able to feel you."

I wanted so badly to jump him but I stayed calm, that was until he took hold of my hand and kissed each one of my fingers, then each knuckle. As soon as his lips left my knuckles and I felt the air move I brought my hands up and felt for his face. My hands finally rested on either side of his head, I let my fingers gracefully move along his chin and lips and I realised that I'd never actually kissed him.

"Kiss me please" I whispered, I hadn't meant to say that out loud but my thumb was resting against his bottom lip and I really need to feel it pressed against mine.

"Are you sure? Because once I do, you're mine, I don't kiss just anyone because I find kissing to be far more intimate than most other sex acts."

I could feel his lips moving as he spoke to me, every so often his tongue would flick out and lightly touch my thumb. The sensation was unnerving, it was as if my thumb was connected to my clit, every faint stroke would send a jolt that would make it throb.

I was trying to think about what he was saying but my brain just wouldn't take it in, I was so busy trying to imagine his lips on mine that I just had to taste him. Without any warning for him or me I leaned forward and just pecked him on the lips. I'd moved my thumb somehow so it was full contact and my clit exploded, the sensation was out of this world.

I heard him make a sound deep in his chest, it wasn't a growl more a strangled cry and I pulled backwards thinking I'd over stepped a line.

"No" he grunted and he pulled me back towards him." I warned you, there is no going back now"

With that he took hold of my face and he stroked my cheeks, I could tell he was looking at me but I knew he couldn't see anything.

"I can tell you're smiling and I can feel that you still have that blush on your face, either that or you're really turned on with the idea of me kissing you, which is it?" he asked

I was so desperate to kiss him I just blurted my answer before I could stop myself, "I need to kiss you"

Before I'd even finished speaking his lips were on mine. At first it was tender and he carefully explored, almost small pecks that covered every inch of my lips. I moved my hands to his chest and started to explore his chest and I slowly raked my nails across one of his nipples.

It was as though I'd flipped a switch, another deep low growl and he pushed his tongue deep into my mouth. What happened next can only be described as a complete takeover. He took charge of the kiss and explored every inch of my lips, tongue and mouth only letting me breathe occasionally. I didn't care and felt totally consumed but what an amazing feeling. If this man could raise feelings like this from just kissing me, what the fuck was going to happen when we finally had sex?

Luckily we were still alone in the suite, when we finally came up for air.

"Fuck! What are you doing to me?" he asked as I felt him slump back against the wall.

"Whatever it is believe me you're having the same effect on me" I was too high from his kiss to make sure my brain to mouth filter was actually working.

"I need to be inside you, in fact I need to be inside you while I kiss you, " was his response and somehow he was standing in front of me lifting me off the bench, I felt him turn me around and the next thing I was straddling him whilst he was sitting down. He started to kiss me again and his hands moved down my back to my ass, squeezing my cheeks in time with his tongue probing my mouth.

"I really fucking want you, if you don't want impaling on my dick now you need to tell me because I won't be able to stop if I kiss you again"

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Thanks to AG and Edlovesme for everything as ever.

Thank you to all the new reviewers, I know you probably won't review a lemon chapter but it's been great to read your new views.


	34. Deprivation Chapter 34

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 34

EPOV

Well I'm here and according to the bartender it is a really quiet night with very few members in. That is not a good start for me. I'm hoping she will come tonight but seeing as she has already run out on me twice I'm not holding out much hope. In fact if she doesn't show tonight I'll try once more then I'm going to probably stop coming here. As much as I love the idea of the club, it's really not the sort of life I want for myself. Yes I'm into casual sex at the moment, and no I'm not going to settle down with any of the women I've had in the alleys and carparks all over this city, but now I know she is out there , well I want more. Maybe I even want what Emmett and Jasper have, I'm not sure and I will probably have to try and see if I can make it work, but I 'm ready to at least try, I think.

The bartender pours me a large Grey Goose and passes it over the bar, "You're the second person that looks like they've really needed this tonight" he says as he adds plenty of ice for me.

I'm impatient now I'm here, so I throw back the drink and slam the glass down on the bar.

"Wish me luck" I say as I move purposely through the bar and into the club. I make straight for the suite and within ten minutes I'm naked, showered and ready to go in.

I opened the inner door and stood just inside for a moment, I needed to just take stock because once I stepped into the room if she wasn't there I wasn't sure what I was going to do. I opened the main door and hesitated for a second ,it because it was definitely quiet in here, in fact I wasn't sure if anyone was actually in, but then I took a huge breath and the scent almost knocked me over. All I could smell was strawberry and coconut and her. The realisation she was here made me gasp, it was a strange sound, a cross between a sigh of relief a girly squeal of excitement and a rumble of arousal.

I couldn't wait to get to her, so I grabbed the rope and made my way around the room. As I moved it was increasingly obvious we were the only two in there at the moment so I decided to break all the rules. I wasn't sure if or when I would get chance again so I wasn't going to waste this opportunity

"You're here, after running out on me twice I wasn't sure you would come back again" I said, it wasn't much of an introduction but I wasn't sure just how long we would have and I didn't want to waste the opportunity with niceties about the weather, whatever the fuck its was doing.

She stayed quiet, well I wasn't having that she had to talk to me so I tried another tact, I just needed to get her talking to me.

"Well aren't you going to talk to me? We're in here alone no one will know, I promise to be quiet if someone comes in" I tried to keep my voice light but I could hear the nerves and the indecision in it.

As soon as she started to speak my heart rate accelerated. I knew I'd heard her briefly before in here but her voice had an almost melodic tone, it was very sensual and went straight to my core and I was beginning to wonder if my brain was playing tricks on me.

"I didn't run out the first time that was just me trying to make a dignified exit before my clumsiness took hold. The second time I will admit to, at the time I was so traumatised by what happened I just had to leave."

Now this confused me what on earth was she talking about? What had happened last time that could have caused her to feel like that? I tried to run through our last encounter but all I really remembered was the euphoric high as she came all over my face.

"I don't understand, what happened to make you feel like that"? I asked. I really wanted to hold her but I was keeping a small distance at the moment because I didn't want to crowd her or give her a reason to panic and bolt.

"Well I had no idea what was happening when you did what you did, I didn't realise women could do that. If I'm honest I thought I had peed on you"

I was completely knocked sideways. I'd been silently congratulating myself on making her come like some erupting volcano and all the time she was thinking she had given me a golden shower. I wanted to laugh and I could feel it bubbling in my chest, just as I was about to let it out I felt a shift in the air around us. I could feel heat, a real source of hot air and I knew instantly she was blushing. I needed to control this or she was going to get embarrassed or upset or both and that would lead to her running out again.

"I can feel the heat from your blush sitting here but please don't be embarrassed; it's refreshing that you are honest enough to admit that to me."

Her response just proved to me how new this was to her, if she didn't know that women could come like that, she had obviously had a very limited sexual past or maybe none at all. The thought suddenly struck me that she could be a virgin, just because I didn't feel a hymen didn't mean anything did it?

Her technique had been good when she 'd blown me though so I'm guessing she had some experience. Shit this was confusing, it's time to take a breath and step back.

"Erm thank you, I think, I'm not really sure how to respond to that."

Another indicator she wasn't very experienced. This made my dick sit upright, while everything screamed innocence and inexperience we were in a sex club and not for the first time; two very confusing situations that just didn't sit together.

"You don't need to say anything, let's just go on from here. Do you want to introduce yourself or do you want this to remain anonymous?" I couldn't believe I'd just said that, I'd decided not to rush things so I wouldn't frighten her off. Then again if she wanted more this was her perfect opportunity to tell me, we could talk in the bar now without doing anymore. Shit I sound like a love sick puppy, what was I doing just letting this woman run the show?

Once again she shocked the shit out of me with an answer I wasn't expecting

"Do you mind if for the moment we stay how we are? I call you' my mystery man' in my head and I'm not quite ready to give that up"

Mystery man hmmm…. I could live with that for now but she was not getting away from me tonight without me having her number.

"That's fine for now, so long as you promise me we will revisit this soon, I'm not going to run the risk of you disappearing on me" I was deadly serious this wasn't going to happen again.

She let out a nervous giggle, it was sweet and made me smile, again I was sure she was young and inexperienced, everything about her just screamed it.

It was killing me sitting so close to her and not touching her so after asking her permission just like my Momma taught me, I took her hand in mine again. The tingles started instantly, the goose bumps followed and then the hairs on my arms and the back of my neck stood up. It was a familiar feeling that I was starting to crave and I didn't want to give up. All that I could have coped with, what I wasn't expecting was for my dick to literally weep at her touch. The precum was bubbling out of the top of my slit and I could feel a gentle but consistent throb I'd never experienced before. It was as though my dick was trying to feel skin itself, it was almost reaching for her independent of me.

I kissed her each of her fingers and then her knuckles; I wanted to keep my lips on her skin as long as possible and by doing this I was able to place little kisses everywhere.

Just as I was about to do a real corny move and start to kiss up her arm, she took hold on my face between her hands. I loved that she actually made a move on me, her hands caressed both of my cheeks and I felt myself moving my head against her touch. Now I know what cats feel like when they purr and rub against your legs. I just about managed to stop the purring sound, I sounded like such a freak in my own head, I needed to get a grip.

As her thumb brushed backwards and forwards across my bottom lip I heard her whisper "kiss me please".

This was something I didn't do. I never really had to do much foreplay, I had most of my conquests turned on before we got to whatever convenient spot I could find to fuck, so it was usually a quick fumble with my fingers to make sure they were lubricated enough to take me and the condom, maybe a few nips on the back of the neck, shoulders, somewhere safe where they couldn't try and capture my lips and then wham bam, in out and as soon as I was done, out and zipped up. This was different though, I instinctively knew that once I kissed her that would be it, she would have to be mine. I had a vision of my hands tangled up in long mahogany hair as I devoured a pair of lips and it made me think. Perhaps she was here with someone, maybe she had a different kink and her partner was somewhere else in the building, I mean look at that prick Garrett and his girl Izzy. Shit this could be Izzy, the thought of that brought an image of Bella into my mind, no I wasn't going there, If this was Izzy and she was going to be mine, she would have to leave Garrett alone and that would make it easier for Bella to get to know him.

"Are you sure? Because once I do, you're mine, I don't kiss just anyone, I find kissing to be far more intimate than most other sex acts."

She obviously didn't think for long because I felt her pucker up and place a kiss full on my lips, I was just sinking into the feeling when she started to pull back. Hell no, not happening, if she was going to do this she had to be all in.

"No I warned you, there is no going back now"

I took hold of her face and told her she was blushing, I could feel the heat hands were on her face and it was unmistakeable, that or she was really turned on. I'm sure I heard her ask me to kiss her or something so I leaned in and started to gently warm her lips up.

What she did next took me to a totally new place, who knew I had such sensitive nipples? I'd never really had anyone take any interest in them so when she raked a nail over it I let out a growl that could have quite easily frightened her. I didn't give her time to worry about it though and In the end, I just totally took over and dominated the kiss, exploring every inch of her mouth. I couldn't stop, I just didn't have the strength to pull away and it was only when I needed to take in oxygen that I gave her a few seconds to do the same.

We kissed and kissed, my poor dick was knocking against my stomach trying to remind me he needed some attention and I think my balls had actually retreated into my stomach. I was so close to blowing that I had to get inside her. I tried to tell her what effect she was having on me and what I needed but I 'm not even sure what I said even made sense. In the end I decided direct action was needed so I just picked her up and moved us so she was sat facing me and straddling my lap. I could smell her arousal and that mixed with her natural scent pushed me over the edge. I couldn't take this any longer, all my good intentions went out of the imaginary window, I needed her now but I was good and asked first

"I really fucking want you, if you don't want impaling on my dick now say so because I won't be able to stop if I kiss you again"

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So they have finally talked, well in a fashion….. what do you think, should she run or kiss him ?


	35. Deprivation Chapter 35

Deprivation Chapter 35

BPOV

He almost growled as he stopped kissing me long enough to utter the most erotic thing I'd ever heard

"I really fucking want you, if you don't want impaling on my dick now say so because I won't be able to stop if I kiss you again "

So it was down to me, my decision. Did I want to take this to the next level and actually have sex with a complete stranger? I know technically this was our third meeting, but he was still a stranger and whilst he had offered I'd made the decision not to let him reveal his name.

His hands were still groping and squeezing my ass cheeks as he patiently waited for me to answer. I leaned back slightly revelling in his touch and took a deep breath. Of course I wanted this, if I'm completely honest he's been on my mind pretty much constantly since the second he'd touched me that first night so no , I wasn't going to pass up an opportunity to see what he could make me feel.

I leant forward and attacked his lips and by that I mean I practically knocked his front teeth out. I pushed my tongue into his mouth and dominated a very hard heavy erotic kiss. I wanted to express to him without words how I was feeling, what he was doing to me and very clearly what I wanted.

"Thank fuck for that! Hold on baby because I'm going to fuck you so hard you'll be feeling me for a week" was his response

With that he slipped his hands round my ass cheeks and pulled them apart, as he did this he lifted me and positioned me above his very solid shaft.

"I need to be inside you so this is going to be hard and fast, I will make love to you later, but right now I just need to be inside you".

He adjusted our position slightly so I could feel the head at my entrance and he then without warning rose up to meet me at the same time as pushing me down onto him. I let out a gasp as he filled me completely and for the first time ever I was full. His length was stretching my walls and I could feel him throbbing, I could actually feel him throbbing inside me, he was pulsing and shaking and it was an incredible feeling. For a second I just let myself be lost in the sensation.

"Sweetheart one of us has to move or I'm going to come before we even get started" he said as he swept his lips across mine.

"Tough I need to kiss you some more first" I said getting brave as I attacked his lips. The feeling as I devoured his mouth sent my clit into overdrive and in that moment I understood his need to move. Slowly I started to rock against him, my clit grazing against him very gently. It was seriously erotic, I was being stimulated inside, and outside directly on my clit and his tongue was dancing in my mouth. I really didn't know what would make me come first but I knew with 100% certainty that I was going to.

"Oh God that feels amazing, I knew you were meant for me, I just knew it" he whispered as he gripped my hips. "You need to let me do this now baby, let me take charge, I promise to make this unforgettable for both of us."

I surrendered instantly because how could I resist a declaration like that? As soon as he felt me relax he stood up taking me with him, still impaled on him. He turned so my back was against the wall and he gently shuffled back until I could feel the coldness of the wall covering against me. I could also feel the thick rope against my buttocks,

"Are you ok?" he asked

"Yes yes yes please just move" I begged

"Ok sweetheart I'm ready"

I was going to brace myself, but he didn't move his hips like I expected him to, instead he started to root around my chest looking for my nipple. I could feel him kissing and nipping all around my breast until he found what he was looking for. He took my nipple into his mouth and started to suckle, it wasn't a straight suck, it was a nip and a suck and a probe with his tongue all at the same time, I brought my hands from his shoulders up into his hair and grabbed hold of two handfuls, his deep moan told me how much he loved that and so I pulled a little harder.

"Fuck, that's good" he said as he released my nipple. "Don't let go ok, just keep doing that and hold onto me"

I did as I was told and I applied pressure to the handfuls of hair I had hold of. He went back to my chest and started rooting for my other nipple, I angled my back to direct him in the right direction and as soon as he latched on I felt sparks fly through my body. What he did next made me come with such intensity that I lost all cohesive thought , he bit down on my nipple and at the same time he pulled back and then slammed back into me.

Every nerve ending in my body fired and I screamed as my body was racked with so many different emotions and sensations.

"Shush sweetheart, I don't want an audience, I want you all to myself" he said as he continued to fuck me hard and fast through my orgasm and as I clamped down round him I could feel my insides throbbing and my juices running out of me.

He kept thrusting, almost in time with the spasms of my pussy walls, never once slowing down and I could feel everything building again, surely this wasn't possible, I'd actually managed to come and it felt like it was actually building all over again.

"Shit I can't hold on much longer, I need to move you again" he said as he pulled me away from the wall. He turned us again and sat down so I was back straddling him,

"Stand up for me sweetheart," he said

I was going to refuse because I didn't want to lose the connection we had, the feeling of him inside me.

"It's ok I just want to try something please. Stand up and turn round, then sit back down on my lap. I won't move"

I did as I was told, trying to understand what he was going to do because I didn't quite see how this was going to work if I was facing away from him.

I felt his hands on my waist as he started to guide me backwards,

"Trust me please, I couldn't and won't do anything to hurt you. All I want to do is bring you pleasure over and over again" he said as he pulled me down onto his lap.

He moved one hand and I realised then what his intention was, he had hold of his length so he could guide it back into me, I sat back and sighed as I felt that wonderful serene feeling of being completely full once more. I relaxed back against his chest and both of his arms wrapped around me, one hand went to my chest and started to tweak my nipple, the other hand went to my clit. His thumb started to tease me as he used his nose to move my hair away from my ear.

"Rock backwards and forwards on me, use me, take what you need, I want to feel you come again all over me then I'm going to fill you with everything I have, that way I know I've marked you as mine inside and out" he said and with that bit my ear lobe, followed by my neck before settling on my shoulder. The pleasure and pain of the biting and sucking made me rock my hips and as soon as I felt the ripples of pleasure it caused I couldn't stop. He was stimulating me everywhere, my neck and shoulder, my nipple, my clit and deep deep inside me. It didn't take much to make me think about what he said, to take what I needed, and I started to rock backwards and forwards, feeling his length stimulating places inside me that I didn't even realise had any nerve receptors.

As I went faster and faster he rubbed my clit and pulled my nipple harder and harder, the pain was easily cancelled out by the pleasure and I just wanted to keep pushing him.

"Shit I'm going to come, can you come again are you ready?" he gasped and he actually sounded like he was in pain. I was tempted to stop, but I needed this and for once I was going to be utterly selfish and use him like he'd told me to. I used him to have another incredible orgasm that I felt from my toes to the top of my head, an orgasm that made me gush my juices all over him and the best part, an orgasm that triggered his release as well. In the middle of everything that I was feeling, I heard him groan and swear and then I felt him explode inside me, I actually felt him pulse as he released everything he had into me. Oh my god I've certainly been missing out all these years.

"Fuck that was amazing, I didn't know " he said as he kissed my shoulder.

"Didn't know what?" I asked as it seemed an incomplete statement.

"I just didn't know" was all he said as he continued to kiss along my shoulders and the back of my neck.

I collapsed back against him and he brought his arms up to completely encase me. He was still nuzzling my hair and the back of my head, "You smell amazing sweetheart. I love the smell of strawberries that follows you around, but you smell even better now because you smell of sex, arousal, me and you and it's intoxicating"

I could feel him deflating slightly inside me and I was aware our combined juices were starting to run down the inside of my leg.

"I need to clean up" I said as I tried to move.

"No not yet, I'm not ready to let you go yet because once you leave this room I don't know when we'll be together again". He was back to kissing my shoulders and smelling my hair.

"We could meet in the bar if you'd like. I'm ready to meet you properly if you are" I said because I was ready. I needed to know if we could do this outside of this room, if we could be like this, if this connection was still there when we could see each other in the light.

"Yes I'm ready too" he agreed.

"Ok well I do need to clean up, so how about I go and get myself sorted and dressed and I'll meet you in the bar in 30 minutes" I told him.

"Not a problem, but how will I know you?" he asked

"I always sit at the bar, so there is always a stool there, wait for me there please" I told him. I thought that was a safe bet because I'd never seen anyone else sit at the bar, the barkeep was always adamant it was supposed to be table service.

"Ok my angel, don't take long I need to see you" he said as he started to stand up.

I turned and went to kiss him, but I only came to his chest, he was tall over six foot and I had to giggle and stand on my tip toes to reach his mouth.

"What's so funny?" he asked

"I hadn't realised how tall you were that's all, now go, go and get dressed and I'll see you in the bar downstairs."

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So are couple are finally going to meet… from a few reviews some of you are running out of patience but good things always come to those who wait…. Well that's what my mum always told me. Not quite sure I agree.

I will try and update again before the holiday season starts but if not MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE. I hope you have a safe and happy time and Santa brings you everything you want.

To AG and Edlovesme xxxxxx


	36. Deprivation Chapter 36

Deprivation Chapter 36

EPOV

"I really fucking want you, if you don't want impaling on my dick now say so because I won't be able to stop if I kiss you again "

I waited for her decision and I wasn't going to push this because it was too important. This woman had really got under my skin and I wanted to see where it could go. I couldn't help but touch her though, she had the most amazing skin, it was like silk and as I kneaded her ass cheeks my dick throbbed as I had visions of sinking my teeth into the peachy soft globes. What was it and fruit with this women? She smelt of strawberries so strongly, with faint undertones of coconut and now I was comparing her ass cheeks to peaches. Get a grip man really…..

I was just deciding whether I could get away with slipping a finger round to massage her asshole when she literally launched herself at me and took me by surprise. The kiss was brutal and it took me a minute to actually settle into enjoying it. Her tongue was everywhere and she was very demanding, which in itself caused me to salute her again. My dick was now aching with the need to be inside her and I couldn't wait any longer.

"Thank fuck for that, hold on baby because I'm going to fuck you so hard you'll be feeling me for a week" I told her as I pulled her ass cheeks apart. The quickest way to get inside her was to do it here, sitting as we were and she could ride me while I was kissing her.

"I need to be inside you so this is going to hard and fast, I will make love to you later, but right now I just need to be inside you". I blurted out. Make Love? Where had that come from? What was she doing to me? I didn't have time to dwell on that but would need to come back to it.

I carefully lifted and positioned her so I could rise up and bring her down onto me at the same time. I knew if I got it right we would more than likely both come pretty quickly because in this position I should be able to stimulate all the sensitive areas inside her as well as outside.

It wasn't until I was finally fully inside her that I realised I'd misjudged the reaction and sensations she was going to bring out of me, all I'd thought about was making her come again but it looked like I was going to embarrass myself and come instantly. I was throbbing and my dick had taken on a life of its own trying to burrow deeper into her.

"Sweetheart one of us has to move or I'm going to come before we even get started" I said out of sheer frustration. Catching my breath I leant forward and touched my lips to hers.

Instantly she was kissing me again, taking charge and ravaging my mouth, it was amazing. All these years I've been missing out and all because I considered kissing too intimate. I should have put in more attention to detail instead of being such an asshole to all those women.

She started to rock backwards and forward and I could feel my dick being clamped by her insides, gently she was toying with me and I couldn't stand it any longer, I needed to fuck her now.

"Oh good that feels amazing, I knew you were meant for me, I just knew it" I whispered to no one in particular, my filter seemed to have disappeared and I hoped I wasn't coming on so strong that I'd frighten her off her again.

"You need to let me do this now baby, let me take charge, I promise to make this unforgettable for both of us." It was a hell of a promise to make but I was half way there already and I knew in all my alley trysts it had never once felt like this.

I carefully stood up, balancing her weight on my fore arms as they were still under her ass cheeks. I wanted to fuck her against the wall, so I slowly moved her backwards until I was sure she was pressed against it. I could feel the rope under her so I knew we could always use that as well for a little support if we needed it. I was still inside her, my dick seemed to refuse to leave his new home and I really couldn't bring myself to pull out slightly. It was only then that I thought about how I was positioned. Ok, I wasn't in an alleyway but here I was with a women I didn't really know about to fuck up her up against a wall and somehow despite my best intentions I'd still found a way to return to type. That thought depressed me and for a few seconds took the shine off the incredible high I'd had since I'd realised she was in the room with me. I took a deep breath, shook the bad thoughts out of my head and thought about what made this different. She was naked and in my arms, she was facing me, which meant I had access to her face and rack and I was just as much into it as she was, there would be no remorse and quick getaways this time. No, she wanted me just as much as I wanted her.

With that thought taking precedent over all others I started to root across her chest for her nipple. I had spent years ignoring all the other erogenous zones on a woman, it was time to start exploring and learning. I found her nipple eventually, not an easy task in the pitch black when I was trying to hold her up and keep my very hard straining dick inside her.

I was really enjoying myself, I was nipping at her skin, sucking, lapping at her nipple and using my teeth to scrape the tender points. I had a vision of her pregnant, me suckling at her breast and my dick throbbed and shook again. Wow where had that come from? I'd never ever given any thought to a nipple fetish, or being happy that someone I was with was pregnant. She brought me back into the moment and away from my fantasies by grabbing hold of two handfuls of hair. Something else I'd never experienced, usually it was me doing the pulling to try and shut them up.

"Fuck, that's good" I said as I released her nipple. "Don't let go ok, just keep doing that, hold onto me"

I needed to move again, I was close to coming so I needed to try and take my mind off it. I went back in for her other nipple, I couldn't show favouritism now could I, and as I bit down hard I quickly pulled back and slammed into her. She came instantly, it was unmistakeable, her inner walls clamped down tight and her juices flooded all around my dick. It was a heavenly feeling, warm and tight and slippery and lush all at the same time. She screamed out, I don't think they were actual words, just moans and noises, we were supposed to be quiet in here and I didn't want to attract any attention

"Shush sweetheart, I don't want an audience, I want you all to myself" I warned her as I continued to plunge in and out of her, each stroke seemed to get deeper and deeper and I knew I was losing my concentration again. I really wasn't ready to come and end this yet so I needed a different sensation, I decided to move her again.

"Shit I can't hold on much longer, I need to move you again"

She seemed to hesitate and I wondered what the problem was, I think I said something about standing up, to be honest at this point I wasn't sure what was real and what was in my head. I was so far into all this I just wanted to keep it going as long as possible.

"It's ok I just want to try something, stand up and turn round, then sit back down on my lap"

She didn't hesitate as much this time and I took that as a green light to do what I wanted to do. I know I wasn't going to be facing her like this but I'd seen it in a film once and I always wanted to try it, it just seemed so intimate to be able to touch her everywhere.

"Trust me please, I couldn't and wouldn't do anything to hurt you, all I want to do is bring you pleasure over and over again" I said as I pulled her down towards my lap. I moved my hand from her waist and took hold of my poor swollen dick, he was seriously weeping now and I knew I wouldn't have long in this position. No matter what I thought about, once I was back inside her it would be a race to see if I could get her to come again before I finally exploded, but that was my aim.

She eased herself back down onto me and as soon as she was seated securely in my lap I took a breath. I was as deep as I was ever going to be inside her, so I brought both my arms around her and one went straight for her nipple while the other went for her clit. I was totally surrounding her and engulfing her at the same time. Every part of her body was touching me in some shape or form. I leant my head forward and moving her hair with my nose I gently blew against her skin. My thumb was stroking her clit, the other hand was playing with her nipple, pulling and tugging and just gently tweaking it. I was everywhere and I fucking loved it.

"Rock backwards and forwards on me, use me, take what you need, I want to feel you come again all over me then I'm going to fill you with everything I have, that way I know I've marked you as mine inside and out" I said directly into her ear, I could feel her shudder from the way my breath blew across the surface as I spoke. I bit her ear lobe, then her neck before making my way to her shoulder. I really couldn't understand my desire to mark her, but I knew I needed to because whoever she was here with needed to see where I'd been and that she was mine now.

"Shit I'm going to come, can you come again are you ready?" I gasped as she used me just as I told her too. I could feel she was building up again and I just hoped I could keep up with her. Finally I felt her release, her juices flooding me again, it was all I needed and I let go, the relief at finally coming sent a wave of pure pleasure from my balls outwards, not stopping until it reached the tips of my toes and the ends of the hair on my head.

"Fuck that was amazing, I didn't know it could feel like that, what have I been missing all these years?" I think I said, again I'm not sure what is in my head and what actually came out of my mouth.

I continued stroking her nipple lightly and I was kissing her neck and shoulders, I didn't want to let her go, this connection we had was amazing, like nothing I'd ever experienced.

"You smell amazing, I love the smell of strawberries that follows you around, but you smell even better now, you smell of sex, arousal, me and you and it's intoxicating" I told her, she had to understand what effect she was having on me.

"I need to clean up" she said as she tried to move off me. I wasn't having that, not yet anyway.

"No not yet, I'm not ready to let you go, once you leave this room I don't know when we'll be together again". I said as I went back to kissing her shoulders and inhaling the gorgeous aroma of her hair.

"We could meet in the bar if you like. I'm ready to meet you properly if you are" She said surprising me. This was fantastic because finally she wasn't going to run out on me.

"Yes I'm ready too" I agreed.

"Ok well I do need to clean up, so how about I go and get myself sorted and dressed, I'll meet you in the bar in 30 minutes" she said as I realised I would have to let go of her.

"Not a problem, but how will I know you?" I asked because I needed to be able to find her again.

"I always sit at the bar, so there is always a stool there, wait for me there" she told me. That made me chuckle, I thought I was the only one who sat at the bar, the poor barman had two of us messing up his system.

"Ok my angel, don't take long because I need to see you" I said as I started to get up. In all honesty I really wasn't ready to let her go because this felt very final. I had to trust that she would be there in the bar like she said she would. I still had my hands on her and as she turned to face me she started to giggle.

"What's so funny?" I asked

"I hadn't realised how tall you were that's all, now go, go and get dressed and I'll see you in the bar down stairs."

With that she walked away from me and I stood watching as the female changing room door opened and I watched her beautiful silhouette go through the door. She closed the door and I sat back down on the bench. What the fuck had just happened? How had a complete stranger, who I had never actually seen got so far under my skin?

Emmett was going to shit himself laughing when I told him about this. All the crap he in particular has given me about my sex life and the kink he and Jasper presumed I'd play out endlessly forever, well they were wrong. It had led me here and to her, now all I had to do was go downstairs and seal the deal.

I was up and out of the room like my ass was on fire, I was showered, dressed and downstairs in no time at all. All I had to do now was wait…

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Renee POV

So my Garrett is finally learning his lesson, he has to understand that he is mine and mine alone and all I'm doing is teaching him that. I will not put up with him playing with other women or men, he has to give up the stories of the pretend women and he has to stop flirting with that bitch Izzy. It's time for him to acknowledge me in public.

I bet Garrett would just love to know that his Izzy has been spending time in the dark room on her visits here, he seems to think she sits quietly in the bar waiting for him, ha well is he in for a surprise when I let him in on her little secret, she is getting it on with whoever is in the Sensory suite at the time.

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	37. Deprivation Chapter 37

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 37

BPOV

I was on such a high when I walked into the changing room, I literally danced around the room before finally making it into the shower. I couldn't believe the sensations that I'd just experienced, I felt whole and female, sexy, sensual and normal but most of all I felt relieved. It wasn't me, I wasn't the reason that the others hadn't been able to make me come, it was in fact their fault they were lousy lovers who had no idea what they were doing.

I briefly thought of the mauling I'd taken at the hands of James and the inept fumbling by Jacob. Okay really Jacob was a boy trying to be a man, he was excused but the other two, no excuses. I wondered if any of their other partners felt like I did right now. Was chemistry something to do with it? Did you have to 'click' with a partner to feel really deep sensations and emotions, or was that just me? All these thoughts were swirling around as I quickly showered making sure to keep my hair as dry as possible. I sat down at the mirror and did my best to repair my make up before getting dressed. Luckily my dress and hair covered the marks on my neck and shoulders because my Mystery man had really gone to town. I hadn't seen hickeys like that since I was in high school, and I'd seriously never had one, so to see my neck now was quite funny. I felt for the first time ever, like I imagined a high school girl would feel after making out with her boyfriend. It wouldn't be funny on Monday though when I'd have to wear a scarf for work .

Conscious of how long I was taking I picked up the pace. I didn't want to leave him in the bar too long alone and not only that I couldn't wait to meet him. I slipped on my shoes and after a last look in the full length mirror I stepped out into the corridor. I quickly walked along the soft plush carpet, taking no notice of the moans and cries coming from the rooms I passed. I was on a mission; to get to the bar as soon as possible.

I turned the corner heading for the staircase when I heard what can only be described as an almost anguishedcry; it was so heartfelt that it stopped me dead in my tracks. Someone was really in pain and not a sexual pain, a real deep sorrowful ache.

I peeked around the partly open door and felt sick at what I saw. Garrett was curled up in a ball naked as the day he was born and sobbing like a baby. I rushed into the room and dropped my bag on the floor as I crouched down over him. He was tied up in a really weird way, his wrists together, his ankles together, his knees together and then the three bindings all connected with one more tie. He couldn't move and as I walked round him so I could see his face, I noticed he had a strange cage thing over his man parts and clamps on his nipples. His whole body was red and he was shaking and crying.

"Fucking hell Garrett! What have you let her do to you?" I shouted as I tried to get his attention, he was still crying and hadn't yet realised I was there.

"Garrett, come on look at me, calm down and look at me" I said as I started to undo the bindings. It took me ages to work my way through the intricate knots and finally lay him on his back. All the while he was whispering "please help me, please help me, make it stop, make it stop".

"Garrett can you hear me, are you ok?" I ran my hand over his brow and along his cheek trying to get him to calm down, the clamps on his nipples looked so sore, the skin was red and angry so I removed them as gently as I could. That caused him to howl in pain and I was worried I'd done something wrong, because surely that should have eased it not made it worse.

"Garrett can you hear me, are you ok?" I tried again and this time I got a response.

"Izzy please help me get out of here, I need to get home" he whispered.

"Where are your clothes?" I asked him but he just shook his head. "She took them as a punishment but she'll be back soon so we have to hurry". He tried to get up but the contraption on his man parts was making that almost impossible.

"You are going to have to take it off, please Izzy the pain is excruciating, please take it off for me".

Five minutes later Renee found us in what probably looked like a very compromising situation. I was trying to work out how to get the cage like contraption off him, but it was strapped around his balls and shaft, something was inserted into his ass and it was all joined together. I couldn't find how to move one part without causing him pain somewhere else. The only good part was that no matter how much I tried not to touch any skin, when I did it had absolutely no effect on him. I've never been happier that a man was in no way attracted to me because if anything had started to 'grow', 'inflate' 'become engorged' or whatever other euphemism you wanted to use instead of hard on, I think I would have had to call the fire brigade to cut it off, The cage that is, not his man hood, before it did any permanent damage to him.

"What the fuck are you doing touching my man?" it screamed at me as he/she came charging into the room.

"'I'm not touching him, as you put it, I'm trying to help him, to free him from the pain you obviously left him in" I spat at her.

"Well don't you fucking touch him again, he's mine now, all mine and I can do what I like to him, it's none of your business anymore" she was so busy screaming at me she still hadn't checked on Garrett.

"Not that he was ever mine you stupid bitch, he is still a human being who is obviously in a great deal of pain and I'm trying to help him" I screamed back at her.

"He deserves the pain, it's his punishment for cheating on me with you, I know he takes you out to dinner, and picks you up in his car, in my book that's cheating, he is not allowed to have relationship with you anymore" Renee ranted on at me.

"Please get this thing off me, please help me" Garrett cried from the floor at the side of us.

"Shut up you ungrateful dog, take the pain and learn to love it, you will be getting a lot more of it if you don't learn to live by my rules" Renee spat at him.

"How can you watch someone you are supposed to care about be in such pain, do you have no feelings for him at all?" I asked as I bent down once more to check him.

"I told you not to touch him you bitch" Renee screamed as she lunged at me. Luckily she was off balance and as she tried to grab me I was able to move to the side. She missed me completely and ended up in a pile on the floor, if it hadn't been for Garrett I probably would have found that really funny.

Just as I was starting to worry how I was going to get both of us out of there Billy came running into the room.

"Someone said they had heard shouting in here so I came up to check, what on earth is going on?" he demanded.

I quickly explained that Garrett was in pain and asked Billy if he knew how to remove whatever was clamped around him. He took a quick look and shook his head, "Who the hell used both of these devices together, they should be used one at a time or they can cause quite serious damage."

I looked over at Renee but she was already scrambling to her feet and running out of the room. I could hear her sobbing as she fled.

"I'm sorry Garrett, this is really going to hurt, but once it's off the pain will subside pretty quickly" Billy said as he reached under the cage like thing and pressed on a button I hadn't noticed. The cage sprang open and after undoing several small metal balls that were trapping his shaft in place it finally came off. I watched in horror as the blood began to flow back into the tissue and the howls of pain that came from Garrett I knew would haunt me for days.

"Ok that was the easy bit, now I'm going to turn you onto your stomach so can take the bung out ok" Billy was stroking his hand up and down Garrett's back trying to calm him, he gently raised Garrett up so he was on his hands and knees, all the time gently stroking and patting him.

"Ok when I say go I want you to bear down and push to expel it ok, don't worry about anything, just concentrate on getting this out ok".

Garrett nodded and wiped the tears from his face.

"OK go" Billy said and he started to tug on the stopper that was peeking out of Garrett's ass.

I will never understand how she managed to get 'the thing' inside of him in the first place, it must have been 16 inches long and it was easily 4 or 5 inches in circumference. It was huge, and I imagine painful.

"Fucking hell Garrett that must have been lodged in your stomach it was so long" was my very adult comment as he rolled over onto his side. He was now free from all his trapping and trying to finally relax.

"Where Renee is she alright?" he asked as he sat up.

"Why are you worried about the psycho bitch when she has just left you after doing this to you?" I asked in amazement.

"Don't call her that Izzy, she is just insecure that's all, I need to find her, make sure she is ok" he said attempting to stand up.

It took two attempts and finally some help from Billy before he was stable enough to move and stand, I wondered how long he had been in that position.

"Shit, shit shit I was supposed to meet someone downstairs," I shouted out as I finally remembered my Mystery Man.

I looked at my watch; I wasn't sure how long I'd been in here with Garrett so hopefully he would still be downstairs.

"Garrett you were begging me to get you out of here 20 minutes ago do you still want that?" I asked him, if he did I could get him downstairs check the bar, and after getting him in a cab, come back in and finally have a face to face meeting with my Mystery Man.

"I need to speak to Renee before I do anything, does anyone know where she went?" he asked looking around us.

I couldn't believe it, I'd just spent who knows how long trying to help the guy and all he cared about was the psycho bitch.

"Ok fine well I'm off to the bar, if I don't see you later, please call me tomorrow and let me know what's happening, I have a feeling things might be very different from now on."

I moved as fast as I dare in my heels along the corridors and down the stairs, not stopping until I was just around the corner from the bar area, "please let him be there, please let him be there, please let him be there" I chanted as I turned the corner.

The bar was empty, not a soul in sight, not even the barman.

"Shit, shit,shit, fuck ,fuck,fuck" I said as I walked up to the bar and my usual stool. I sat down and banged my bag on the bar top. The barman appeared from somewhere and started to pour me a Grey Goose, this was so bad; he knew what I wanted before I did.

"I don't suppose anyone has asked after me? I was supposed to meet someone here but I got waylaid". It was a desperate attempt, but you never know.

I was ready to cry, fucking Garrett , he'd ruined everything because Mystery Man wasn't going to put up with me running out on him a third time, I was sure of that. The barman put my drink down on the coaster; the clinking of the ice getting my attention however what I wasn't expecting was the white envelope that was placed at the side of it. It was addressed to 'My Strawberry Girl' and I just stared at it.

"He left about ten minutes ago, said there was a slim chance you would ask after him so he left this for you just in case. He drinks Grey Goose too in case you are wondering, just the same as you do" the barman said as he turned away to try and give me some privacy. I ripped open the envelope hoping he'd at least left me a way to contact him.

 _ **Well I can't believe you ran from me again Strawberry Girl, I thought this time you understood you are mine now. Somehow though, with all the commotion in here tonight I get the feeling that this time it isn't quite your fault. I'm not sure why but well….. The bottom line is this, I DO NOT SHARE so if you want me, sort out whatever problems or attachments that keep taking you away from me and then call me… I won't be returning to the club again.**_

The letter was just signed 'Your Mystery Man' and there was a mobile number at the very bottom.

Finally I had a way of contacting him.

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Renee POV

I can't believe that she was touching my man again. I was just stood watching from across the corridor when I saw her. She should have just gone down to the bar and left him alone.

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Ok before you all get mad with me for not letting them meet, remember she now has a phone number to call him !

Merry Christmas everyone I hope you all have a happy and safe time with your loved ones.


	38. Deprivation Chapter 38

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 38

EPOV

So I waited and I waited…. How long does it take a woman to get cleaned up and dressed and come out into the hallway? I'd done it in eight minutes; I'd checked my watch to make sure I hadn't been too long. Thinking about it I hadn't really dated a woman seriously, all I'd ever done in the early days was pick up a few from their homes and apartments so I had no idea how long they took to get ready. Since I'd been just about the easy sex it wasn't even a glimmer of anything…..

The barman passed me a drink and I was thought about what 'Strawberry Girl' had said about sitting at the bar,

"Am I the only one who sits here? I know you would prefer it if I was sat over there, but I'm curious does anyone else use this stool?" I asked because he had to know her, he'd been on duty every time I'd been in this place.

"Why do you ask?" he said turning away from me, he was being evasive, well tough shit. I was a master at that, no way was he not telling me.

"I'm just curious, I don't know if Billy and Sue mentioned it but I'm opening an old fashioned gentlemen's club just down the block and from experience I know some people like to sit at a bar and talk to the barmen. They always say a good bar person knows as many secrets if not more than the local priest".

I was hoping flattery and the vague idea of a new job offer would make him open up a little, and sure enough I could see the interest prick his conscience.

"There is a lady that sits at the bar also, she's only been coming here as long as you have, and she drinks Grey Goose that same as you do."

"Really what is she like is she young, old, tall, short?" I was desperate to know but I couldn't let on why I wanted the info.

"She's in her early to mid-twenties, quite petite and has long brunette hair, why?" he asked obviously suspicious.

"No reason just trying to work out the demographic of this place in relation to my club. I'm hoping to merge some of the members here into my club, only the men of course, but it's always good to know your clientele." I was really waffling now, trying to cover my tracks and lead him away from the information he'd given me.

So Strawberry Girl was a little younger than me, I knew she was petite because I know her body and had long hair. I'm definitely thinking now that it is Izzy and what almost confirmed it for me was that she was a new member as well. If she had joined with that prick Garrett then it was her in the blue dress.

That explained a lot, she would be running off afterwards because she would be going back to him, which the thought of made me feel sick to my stomach. He was doing whatever he wanted here with whomever, seeing Izzy and also seeing Bella, what's up with the guy was he a sex maniac or something?

I was getting impatient I needed to see Izzy to have her back in my arms so where the hell was she?

I looked at my watch, I had already been sitting at the bar for 35 minutes , surely it didn't take that long to get dressed? I'd give her five more minutes then I'd have to admit she had run out on me again.

I was playing with the dregs in the bottom of my drink feeling very sorry for myself, when Renee came running through the bar in floods of tears. She dashed into the cloakroom and came out carrying her coat. She stopped for a second and turned and looked my way but really to the barman,

"Tell Billy I'm done, I can't do this anymore. I need to get away from Garrett and his bitch " with that she pulled on her coat and went running out of the front doors.

"Always fucking drama with him.I don't know about having his dick cut off, he's already a fucking grade A drama queen" the barman muttered as he continued to wipe the bar top.

I spluttered all over him, the last dregs were no longer in my glass they were on his shirt.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I asked him. "He, bits cut off, he" I spluttered.

The barman grinned "I'm not supposed to talk about it you know, secrets, the confessional, a signed NDA".

"Oh come on you can't leave it like that, are you saying that Renee is actually a man with all working tackle?" I asked

"I couldn't possibly answer that question" he said looking at me as he nodded vigorously.

Excellent I had a barman that was a gossip.

"Are you also telling me that said hostess was actually banging Garrett here at the club?"

"I couldn't possibly answer that question" he said looking at me as he nodded vigorously again but making a hand motion to indicate there was more to it.

"So was he banging said hostess away from the club as well?"

"I couldn't possibly answer that question" he said yet again but continued nodding and gesturing there was more.

How could there be more? "So he was seeing Renee outside the club as well, what's more than that, oh shit don't tell me he has already moved said hostess into his home?" no chance no never.

"I couldn't possibly answer that question" he said yet again but continued nodding.

"Wow! So he's living with Renee, seeing Izzy and dating Bella" I couldn't believe the mess he had got himself into. "This is just too much I need to speak to Emmett."

"Before you do an alarm has just gone off upstairs, which means something has happened and Billy has gone racing up the floor the sensory suite is on." The barman started to explain as he looked at my probably bewildered face and pointed under the counter, "CCTV and comms system. I can see people coming and going all over the club".

I don't know why but I just knew the problem was what was keeping Izzy, the more I thought about it the more I was sure she was my 'Strawberry Girl.'

"I'm going to go, I'm pretty sure that my chance has passed so if I don't see you again, look for my club opening because I can always use good loyal bar staff" I held my hand out to shake his but he turned away. That was incredibly rude and he had just lost any chance of a job with me.

"Before you go why don't you leave the lady a note? I'll make sure she gets it, if she asks me" he said passing me a piece of paper, a pen and an envelope.

"How could you know?" I asked him.

"I'm a barman an excellent one and I'm paid to know what happens in here but keep it quiet" he said with a smirk.

I looked at the paper and tried to decide what I wanted to say, I just sad that she had run again, presuming she had, but the barman seemed to want me to give her the benefit of the doubt so I quickly scribbled down what I wanted to say.

 _ **Well I can't believe you ran from me again Strawberry Girl, I thought this time you understood you are mine now. Somehow though with all the commotion in here tonight I get the feeling that this time it isn't quite your fault, I'm not sure why but well….. The bottom line is this, I DO NOT SHARE so if you want me, sort out whatever problems or attachments that keep taking you away from me and then call me… I won't be returning to the club again.**_

I signed it Your Mystery Man and in a fit of bravado I added my private mobile number. The ball was firmly in her court now she could call me or not, but I really hope she did.

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To AG and Edlovesme I hope you both have an amazing Christmas.

If you fancy a change go and read Ladyletters new story, it's based around Leah and Jacob and the second chapter is due very soon.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE XX


	39. Deprivation Chapter 39

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

 **Ok this is something a little different, instead of two separate chapters your getting one combined, so watch for the POV changing.**

 **Hope you have all eaten too much, drunk too much and slept too much xx**

Deprivation Chapter 39

BPOV

It had been three whole days since he'd left me the note at the bar and I was still deciding how to or even if to contact him. The notepad I keep at the side of my bed, for when I had these great ideas in the night for the multi award winning novel I'm eventually going to write, or the doodling I used to do while James was busy, was full of opening one liners and ideas of what I actually wanted to say.

I'd tried funny, sarcastic, friendly, sexy, rude, downright rude, classy and indifferent (don't ask I was pulling my hair out by this stage). Nothing seemed natural enough and I was close to calling in reinforcements. I really didn't want to include the girls this time; I knew them well enough to guess their suggestions

Rosalie - Come and fuck me big boy NOW

Bree - I'm here waiting sexy, come and get me

Tanya - this lingerie is so uncomfortable, come and help me take it off

Irina - will you be my booty call?

I know the others would be all in a similar vein. I didn't want that though, just because we had met in such a bizarre way, doesn't mean that I needed to be an out and out whore. Realistically I did want all of the above, and more. I wanted him to come and get me, strip me off and do the business but I really would like to get to know him as well, the person behind the magic fingers and sexy voice, my wonderfully erotic "Mystery Man"

We've done everything back to front and I'm not sure if we can go back now, perhaps all I'll ever be is the booty call girl. Now I know he isn't going to the club again it's up to me, I have to 'woman up' (Rosalie's favourite saying when something needs facing head on) and contact him or that's it, it's all over before it really got going. If I'm honest I don't want it to be over, he rocked my world, more than once and broke my orgasm drought so for that I'm extremely grateful if nothing else. Could I even give up the chance to have more orgasms like that? I may never find that again, what if every man is like James and MM is the exception?

By Friday I really couldn't concentrate at all. I hadn't been sleeping properly so I was grouchier than normal. My work colleagues are avoiding me even more than normal, Rosalie has threatened to set Emmett on me to find out what's wrong and my poor sneakers are worn out from all the running on thetreadmill I've been doing. The only way I can actually get him out of my mind is to fill my head with loud music and when I do that I have to run. I knew that fate was stepping in again when I came across an old playlist on my iPod my mum had made for me of her favourite 80's songs , the first one that played after I selected random was "CALL ME" by GO WEST an English band my mum loved. The lyrics rambled on about calling a guy, not hesitating, calling him now. In the end I had to stop and take the ear buds out before I had a meltdown in the gym. I took a steady stroll back to my apartment and set about getting ready to head out.

We were all getting together tonight to finally have an official engagement party for Jasper and Alice. Her parents were still pretending nothing was happening and had refused to discuss anything to do with the wedding or even the engagement, so Alice had promptly moved out of home and in with Jasper. Emmett had given his blessing (but despite trying numerous times hadn't managed to convince his parents) so Alice was happy to least have her brother there and Jasper looked ten years younger from no longer having to hide his love for her.

The party was to be at Jasper's apartment and they had invited the usual suspects as well as some college friends of Alice's and a few business colleagues along with a few of Emmett's teammates who knew Jasper. In total they were expecting about thirty people so it was going to be a nice night and not too rowdy. In fact Alice was going for a sophisticated cocktail party feel as a theme. She had asked us to dress appropriately so I had had to dig into the back of my wardrobe to find something. Rosalie wanted me to wear the blue dress again, the one I wore on my blind date with Garrett, but to be honest I didn't have the energy to fight with the tit tape so I dug out a lovely sapphire blue cocktail dress I'd had for about a year but never worn (that's what happens when you go shopping with Rosalie after a loooooong liquid lunch!) I'd never really had any reason to wear it before but now was the perfect opportunity.

I had a lovely long soak now I had unlimited hot water again, I shaved all the bits that needed touching up and seeing as it was such a special occasion I opened the gift set Mum had given me as part of last year's Christmas gift. It was some very expensive European brand that had a body wash, body butter and matching perfume. It smelt heavenly and so different from what I normally wore. I carefully applied my make-up, again heavier and more glamorous than normal and did my hair; I slipped on a pair of tiny panties and took the dress out of its protective wrapper. It fit beautifully, my shape had changed slightly over the years, I was more toned and a little curvier but my boobs were exactly where they should be and I felt great. Slipping on my heels and sorting out my little bag I grabbed my gift for the happy couple and called down to Albert on the desk to sort me out a cab. At the last minute I decided to have a good spray of the matching perfume to make sure the fragrance lasted all night. The smell was divine, very heavy and not at all like something I would wear normally, but because it was dramatic and it went well with my outfit and look. I left a small lamp on, because let's face it no one wants to come home to the darkness alone, threw on a short jacket and went downstairs.

Jasper lived about 12 blocks away so the ride was short and as planned I was one of the first to arrive. Alice had asked me to help to make sure everything was perfect for the evening. She was so nervous, I'd spoken to her every day this week, alternating between calming her about this party, talking her down after her mother had upset her yet again, and then building her up when she worried all this was too soon. Once tonight was over with she would be fine and they would be able get on with the rest of their lives, any idiot could see how much in love they were.

Jumping out of the cab, I spoke to their doorman and he pointed me in the direction of their apartment. Alice was waiting for me and she dragged me into her new home. The apartment was wonderful, very masculine, but that was to be expected really as Alice hadn't been here long enough to influence the decor and Jasper had lived here for a while alone. She gave me a quick tour and then we set about sorting some little appetisers that could be handed around. I'd already given her a list of ingredients to get in and I helped her plate everything up. We did some mini bagels stuffed with crème fraiche and smoked salmon, olives, pigs in blankets, a couple of different dips and crudités and some mini quiches and samosas. It was all finger food and once it was served it could be left on the side for people to pick as they wanted it. Jasper was sorting out the drink and as a surprise the girls had ordered an engagement cake from a local famous bakery. Rosalie was bringing it over later with Emmett.

Just as I poured myself my first drink my phone pinged with a text. Now realistically I knew he didn't have my number but every time my phone made any noise I either jumped out of my skin or depending on what I was thinking about, my poor clitoris throbbed. I was so sick of being aroused and not being able to do anything about it. PETE was no more and I'd thrown 6 of his predecessors away,ones that had been relegated from my bedside drawer once I had found him, this week alone in frustration, they hadn't raised a grin never mind anything else. I tried my fingers, the shower head and in the end the complete toy chest I kept under the bed, but I felt nothing not even a quiver, which was so strange seeing as I was half way there most of the time already.

Any way back to the text, I looked down and it was Garrett. I'd been avoiding him all week because I am really not interested in the state of his relationship with Reggie, in fact the way I feel right now it would be too soon if I never saw either of them ever again.

"Alice have you invited Garrett tonight?" I shouted to her, she was in the bathroom finishing off her makeup.

"Well as far as I know you are still casually dating him aren't you? She shouted back.

"No not anymore, I think he has hooked up with someone else" it was the easiest way to just shut her down hopefully.

"Well he didn't say he was bringing anyone else, so maybe he is still into you" she said.

"That ship has sailed I'm afraid, never going back there" I was adamant about that.

I deleted the text without even reading it. It was time to party.

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EPOV

I was sitting at my desk looking at my phone as usual, it had been a really long week and I still hadn't heard from my Strawberry Girl. Why the hell hasn't she called me? Maybe I'd read the situation wrong on Saturday night after all.

I went back to my emails when one from Jasper caught my eye.

Oh shit! It's the engagement party tonight. Where the hell am I going to get a gift at this time? I did what every good son would do, and called my mother, because she would have a connection somewhere that could help.

"Good evening Mother I need your help please"

"Good evening darling, what is it, are you ok?"

"Yes but I need an engagement present now for Jasper and Alice"

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BPOV

Everyone is here, I think. The place is just nicely full, not over crowded or too warm, everyone can mingle and the conversation is flowing. I'm serving drinks and canapés, mainly so I can avoid Rosalie and her nosey behaviour and Garret and his puppy dog eyes he keeps flashing at me. He wants to put on a united front tonight because once again he and Reggie are back on so he needs me to be his pretend girlfriend in front of his teammates. Why he would want to be with that psycho after what he did astounds me hey ho. Why he just doesn't come clean I don't know, but apparently being gay doesn't sit well with the image of top class soccer players. My bet is they wouldn't care once they got over the initial shock.

By ten o'clock my feet hurt from being constantly on the go and my face hurts from smiling so much, but it's been a wonderful evening. I've helped Alice serve the cake after her and Jasper made the first cut and I've even loaded the dish washer twice. Now I'm hiding in the guest room so I can have ten minutes to myself.

I'm once again playing with my phone and before I can stop myself I send a simple text message

 _ **Hi MM, what are you doing tonight? SG x**_

I waited to see if he answered acknowledging it would be a while if he was in the dark room, because no pockets when you're naked. I hoped would get the MM (Mystery man) and SG (Strawberry Girl) references. His return text took just two minutes and made me break into the biggest smile.

 _ **Well well what a nice surprise, I'd almost given up on you SG. I'm on my way to a party & I'm v v late. MM**_

I wanted to imagine he was coming here, but I'm sure I heard Jasper say earlier that everyone he was expecting had arrived, that's why they had cut the cake.

 _ **How come you are so late, were you being naughty? SG x**_

I couldn't help asking because I was curious to see if he was at the club.

 _ **I haven't been naughty since you ran out on me again SG.**_

I hated that he thought I'd done it again, fucking Reggie, I swear I'm going to…..

 _ **I'm so sorry about that, things got out of control. I was on my way to the bar, promise. SG x**_

 _ **Yes I had a feeling you were, there was quite a bit of drama in the club that night.**_

Shit what did Reggie say on his way out?

 _ **You still haven't said why you are so late for your party? SG x**_

 _ **Had to collect the present, it was at my parent's house**_

 _ **You mean you forgot and your Mom organised a present for you? SG x**_

 _ **Pretty much yep, Busted!**_

 _ **Well enjoy your party MM. Until we meet again. SG x**_

 _ **You do realise I have your number now SG? I'll be calling you very soon, promise MM xx**_

With that I let out a huge giggle, he was going to call me, shit he was going to call me, and he sent me two kisses! I'm such a girl.

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EPOV

Oh thank fuck! Finally, she's made contact. I was beginning to think I wasn't going to hear from her. It was such a gamble leaving that note but I couldn't just let it go and I'm not sure if she hadn't texted me whether I would have gone back to the club, just to see if she was there. I need to try and find Izzy and hopefully tonight I can start. I spoke to Emmett earlier in the week and he assured me that Garrett had been invited tonight. It was a very strange conversation and I'm not quite sure what Emmett thought, me showing so much interest in the movements of one of his teammates. He'd be a lot more worried if he knew Garret swung both ways, in fact dear old Garrett swung just about every way possible. I was trying to work out who he would bring to the party, Renee lived with him apparently, but he was with Izzy sometimes at the club and he was taking Bella out for dinner casually. My bet tonight was that he would be with Bella because she was friends with Alice, he couldn't realistically bring Renee. Emmett would have bust a gut to tell me about that if he'd have known. No way would he have been able to hold that secret in. I also couldn't see him flaunting Izzy in front of Bella or her friends. My plan of attack was to try and find out where Izzy was, and to find out if Bella knew about her.

I'm here now anyway so I need to get my game face on. I knocked on the door but no one answered, presumably because I'm so late and the party is in full swing. I let myself in and Alice saw me and waved, pointing to the hallway. I presumed she wanted to take the gift and my coat so I crossed the main room and followed her into one of the guestrooms.

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BPOV

Shit that was a bad way for the conversation to go really. I'd stopped giggling and finally looked at the messages again, yes he had my number now and he promised to call me so that meant I was back to checking my phone every two minutes obsessively. I couldn't do that, not tonight, so I made the decision to put my phone in my bag and leave my bag with my jacket. That way I wouldn't be tempted. Anyway he wouldn't have time to call me if he was going to a party I figured.

I made my way back to the kitchen and got another platter of canapés out of the warmer. Alice didn't want anyone to drink too much so we had agreed to keep the nibbles coming out all night. As I left the kitchen area I walked straight into Garrett, "Izzy please stop ignoring me, I need to talk to you urgently"

I really didn't want to but I suppose things had to be said.

"OK but first up please stop calling me Izzy, I much prefer Bella"

"Ok I'll call you whatever you want; but please I need you to be my date tonight"

"Why, is it so unusual for you to turn up by yourself somewhere? Anyway you're too late. I've already told my friends we probably wouldn't be going out again because of where you took me on our first date. Actually on that subject I suggest you stay away from Rosalie, she hasn't seen you since that night so she is waiting patiently to let you know what she thinks about your dating technique." If he thought Reggie was a diva, he hadn't seen anything until he had witnessed Rosalie on the war path.

"Speak of the devil" I said as Rosalie came gliding towards us.

"Bella" she said kissing my cheek, turning to Garrett she looked him straight in the eyes "fuck off pervert" was her friendly greeting to him.

I'm really not sure why but I jumped in to defend him saying "Don't Rosalie, that's not nice. You know I've benefitted from the membership" I didn't want to say anymore, Garrett and I had never discussed what I did in the club whilst he was with Reggie, so I wasn't about to volunteer the information now.

"Mmmm I suppose that is true, ok I'll be nice..ish. Now why are you bothering her?" she asked quite fiercely staring at Garrett.

"He's not bothering me, he's just talking to me, and now he's finished he's going back to his friends aren't you?" I said nodding at him. He took the hint and scurried away.

"Thank you Rose. I really didn't want to have to deal with him tonight and hopefully I won't have to see him again."

"You know Bella sooner or later you are going to have to tell me everything that happened between the two of you." I nodded and gestured for her to re-join the main room. I needed to change the topic of conversation as soon as possible.

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EPOV

Ok now I'm confused. Izzy and Bella are the same person? Bella doesn't want to see Garrett anymore, but he wants a date tonight, presumably as cover because he can't bring Renee to a party like this. Rosalie hates him and Bella has a membership to the club which she's benefitted from.

Now I'm really confused. I guess that's what you get from listening to parts of conversations whilst hiding around a corner out of sight. My main problem is though from the quick whiff I got then Bella/Izzy smells nothing like my Strawberry Girl, the scent is just all wrong.

So I'm back to square one. Who the fuck is she? I do have her number now though so it's up to me to find out.

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	40. Deprivation Chapter 40

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 40

EPOV

Well this serves me right for listening at doorways…..

Who the hell is going to be able to give me some answers? I feel as though I'm missing just one piece of the jigsaw and then everything will finally fall in to place. It is driving me fucking crazy trying to find Strawberry Girl, and just when I thought I was close, I find out Izzy and Bella are maybe the same person. How the hell did that happen? How could she be in two places at once? Thinking about it though if it is one person then that explains how Garrett was able to take Bella to dinner but take Izzy to the club.

I cast my mind back to the very first night in the club; the taster evening. Izzy had on a blue dress and long dark hair and thinking about Bella now I can see the resemblance. How did I miss that? Shit I think I'm losing my mind here. Think dumb ass, think….

I go and get another drink, I really need to mingle and say hello to some people and maybe even prospective customers for my new club, but I'm aware that I should keep out of Bella and Garrett's way. Garrett has definitely seen me at the club and while he won't want his business broadcast to the room neither do I. As I grab another beer from the cupboard, because I know where Jasper keeps his stash of the good stuff (the imported beer) I hear footsteps entering the kitchen area.

"You know if Garrett is getting ready to dump Bella because she is frigid, I think I might just have to give her a go, anyone who can resist that slick fucker has got be worth the time of day" the voice said.

I stood up to make myself known and to see who was talking. It was a couple of Emmett's teammates, Alec one was called and the other, well who gives a fuck? I recognised his face having seen him maybe a couple of times.

"Hi Ed, didn't see you there, any beers going? Alec asked.

I passed them a couple of the cheap commercial shit and smiled as they moved back to the party.

So Garret was already covering for why Bella was avoiding him like the plague, I was so tempted to ask him about Renee but I knew I couldn't. Apart from Emmett and Jasper no one here knew I'd ever been to the club, and the guys only knew I'd been the once. They also had no idea about Strawberry Girl.

Once upon a time they would have been all over me for details, hell they would have even been there with me but it just shows how people change when they meet their soul mates, If you believe in all that crap of course, which I don't.

That's when it struck me! One person had access to all of us and was bound to know something Emmett, of course Emmett.

I only had to look up to find him, his height made him easily visible, that and the fact he was in fine form tonight so I could hear him over the general conversation and music anyway. He was singing away to Frank Sinatra at the moment, I think it was his attempt to seduce Rosalie, he was in full flow singing "Come Fly with me" when I walked up to him. I knew I was probably interrupting a moment but let's be honest Rosalie was already a sure thing and I needed information.

"Can I borrow him for a few minutes Rosalie? I just need to talk to him" I said as I grabbed his arm and pulled him away.

"Wow! Hold up Cullen as much as I like you Rosalie is the one and you are going to have to get used to it. Not only that, I don't swing that way" he said as he realised I was dragging him towards the guest rooms.

"Shut up you stupid fucker! I need to ask you something and I need some advice, so come quietly for a minute will you?" I said as I pushed him forcefully into the room.

"I can quite honestly tell you I am nowhere near coming at this point, but later on this evening is another matter and it's never quietly, so get a wiggle on so I can get back to my lady" he said sitting down on the pile of coats and purses that were on the bed.

"I need to tell you something that you need to keep quiet. You have to promise me you will not tell Rosalie or anyone else" I said facing him.

"Oh shit, you are going to be a daddy aren't you? One of the many nameless has finally caught up with you" before I could stop him or tell him not so be so stupid he was up and out of the room. Seconds later he was back with a very worried looking Jasper.

"What the fuck are we doing in my guestroom at my engagement party dudes? What is so important?" Jasper asked

"He's going to be a daddy, I know because nothing else would make him look like that" Emmett said as he pointed at my face.

"Fuck! I knew this would happen. What was it? A split condom or couldn't you wait and you just went bareback you stupid fucker!" Jasper was angry and pacing the room.

I stood looking at them, did they really think I was so stupid? I mean I knew condoms could split, I only ever bought the best and believe me in all my alley trysts I had never ever gone bareback. The only time I had ever been inside a woman uncovered was my Strawberry Girl. Oh shit! I never even thought to ask her, bit late now I guess. I know I'm clean and the club did ask for a full medical before I joined so she will have had to do the same surely.

"Shut the fuck up both of you, I am not going to be a daddy, so sit down and listen" I shouted at them. Thank fully they both stopped dead and sat back on the bed.

" I need to tell you something but I want you to listen to everything and I mean everything before you start to comment. Once you have the full story then we'll work out what my next move is ok?" they both nodded and folded their arms in sync, it was quite comical to watch.

"Are you going to be arrested and we will be accessories or your alibi?" Jasper asked.

"For fucks sake just listen to me…..please" I said as I paced in front of them.

I started to tell them my story, about the first taster evening, Garrett and a woman being there, my second and third visit, strawberry girl, my suspicions about Izzy and Bella and finally what I knew about Garrett and Renee. I know it wasn't my place to 'out him' but I was still seething from the comment about him getting ready to dump Bella because she was supposedly frigid.

"Erm I don't know where to start, I mean who is Renee? How do you know about the Izzy/ Bella thing and why did you go back there without us? Jasper looked quite annoyed but as though he was trying to put the pieces together, Emmett on the other hand ….. Well Emmett looked like he had been slapped and I knew he hadn't taken it all in, he needed a minute to process…

"What the fuck do you mean he took Bella to a sex club? We went out with them, he told me he was taking her to a club, I didn't realise it was that one. He was supposed to show her a good night and then fuck her that's all" Emmett suddenly roared as he shot off the bed and started for the door.

"Wait "Jasper shouted grabbing hold of Emmett. "Before you go out there and ruin Alice's night let's just clear up a few points. Now who the fuck is Izzy? And what has that got to do with Bella and this mystery woman you've been meeting."

Emmett sat back down and put his head in his hands, then he suddenly shot up again.

"Fuck Bella is probably Izzy, on the night we all went out she introduced herself as Izzy to Garrett and when I asked Rosalie later about that she told me that Bella's proper name is actually Isabella, but only her grandma and mum use it. Her family and friends call her Bella but because Garrett was a blind date she went with Izzy. Oh oh oh now I remember, Rosalie was shouting at me the day after I think, I was on my cell and the reception was really bad, something about him taking her to a new club and fucking her and someone else "

I looked at Jasper and he just shrugged his shoulders "I don't understand it either" he said.

"So we're sure then that Izzy is Bella?" I asked.

"No Bella is Izzy" Emmett stated shaking his head.

"Either way we're sure that it's the same girl"? I asked.

We all looked at each other and nodded.

"Ok, so next question, when I spilt the beer in your new bar, was Bella there? I asked Jasper.

"Edward not only was she there, but she took the full brunt of it, you soaked her. She had to go home straight after because her jeans were stuck to her." Jasper explained then he suddenly looked at me.

"That is why you were perving at the entrance to the toilets isn't it? You had smelt her and you were looking for her again"

I blushed for the first time in years as I nodded agreeing with him.

"Thank fuck for that, I thought you'd developed a new kink and I was going to have to ban you from my bars. Last thing I needed was you arrested as some sort of pervert for sniffing women as they came out of the restrooms." They both burst out laughing and high fived each other.

"When you are done congratulating yourselves and laughing at me, we still haven't worked out who Strawberry Girl is."

"Well that is easy, just go out into the party and sniff Bella" Emmett said with a grin on his face.

"I've already done that and she smells all different, nothing like Strawberry Girl" I admitted, blushing once again when they roared with laughter a second time.

"Ok, ok well if it's not Bella lets invite her to the party anyway, you have her number now remember." Jasper, ever the sensible and calm one among us pointed out this fact.

Reaching for my phone I looked at them "Should I call or text?"

"Fuck we are three grown men, sitting in a bedroom trying to decide if one of us should call a girl, I feel fifteen again" Emmett was now bouncing around the room he was so excited.

"Call her and invite her" said Jasper as Emmett said "NO text her then if she isn't ready to meet you she won't be forced into a decision"

"That is a very good point Em, text it is" I said as I quickly sent a text asking her to call me if she wanted to meet me at the party. As I pressed the button and watched the message disappear a beeping noise could be heard in the mass of coats at the side of Jasper. We all looked at each other and said " No" at the same time.

"Do it again, just to make sure" said Emmett as he started to move coats.

I sent another text, this time telling her I really wanted to meet her. The bleeping started again and this time Emmett was ready for it, he scooped up a small bag that was definitely beeping.

"Fuck Strawberry Girl is here" I said as I sat down.

"We don't know that for sure, it could be a coincidence" Jasper stated. "There is only one way to find out, Emmett look in the bag"

"No chance mate, my mother would kill me if she knew I'd gone in a ladies handbag. For years I thought something with teeth lived inside them and it would bite my fingers if you opened it"

"He's right" I said

"What the fuck are you idiots talking about? Nothing lives inside a woman's handbag, most of them are full of crap and the kitchen sink if Alice's is anything to go by."

"No don't you be an idiot, you really shouldn't go in a ladies handbag" I agreed with Emmett on that point.

"Well the only other thing we can do is watch who takes this bag home with them tonight" Jasper stated as he put the bag back in the pile. I saw my chance to know for sure who Strawberry Girl was slipping away

"Fuck that I'm not waiting any longer I can't. I need to know if it's her." I said as I grabbed for the bag.

"No Edward you can't, it's not right" Emmett said as he snatched the bag away from me.

Jasper snatched the bag away from him.

"Hold it you two, now wait" he said as he put the bag behind his back.

"Are we sure that you want to do this? You could be scared for life with what you see in this bag" Jasper said , now waving it about in front of me.

"Just open it will you, I need to see her phone".

Slowly Jasper opened the small bag. He reached in and pulled the contents out, spilling it on to the bed. Her driving licence was there – Isabella Marie Swan, the bag belonged to Bella. There was also her phone and some other stuff that really wasn't very interesting.

"OK just to be 100% sure, call her phone and make sure" Jasper said as he grabbed it off the bed.

I rang the number for the first time and her phone burst into life, I quickly hung up and we put everything back in her little bag.

"OK so what now? Are you going to go and talk to her?" Jasper was obviously trying to be diplomatic but he was dying to know what my next move was going to be.

"I don't know, I need to sort everything out in my mind and come up with a plan".

Just as we were getting ready to leave the guestroom, Emmett stopped dead, "Edward who the fuck is Renee?"

I thought I had got away with that, he was so wrapped up with the Bella/Izzy thing and I was hoping he would let it go.

"Erm Emm, can we cover that another night? I will explain it to you later but now I need to get out there try and find Bella." I said as we pushed him out of the guest room.

Looking around Bella was not in the main room, I quickly went towards the kitchen but she wasn't in there either, this wasn't looking good. I Loitered outside the guestroom and the guest bathroom , knowing she had to be in one of them.

As the door to the other guestroom opened Bella came out, she was surprised to see me and just said hello and carried on walking. She had absolutely no idea I was Mystery Man but I was now sure she was my Strawberry Girl, question was how was I going to introduce myself to her, in the light so to speak?

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So now he knows who strawberry Girl is…..what is he going to do with the information?

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To AG and Edlovesme thank you as ever for your comments and hard work I couldn't do this with out you. The next chapter will be with you tomorrow. No pressure AG but we are catching you up ! xx


	41. Deprivation Chapter 41

Deprivation Chapter 41

EPOV

Ok so I'm convinced now that Bella is my Strawberry Girl, I 'm trying to decide whether to just call her and tell her who I am and ask her to meet me or to try and get to know her as myself, just us being Bella and Edward. We know each other's bodies, in fact I could definitely pick her out of a line up in the dark but I don't know Bella. I have no idea what she does for a living, where she lives (I didn't spend enough time looking at her driving licence) or even how old she is. Yet I can still taste her skin on my tongue and feel her gripping my cock every time I close my eyes. This woman has really got under my skin I need to spend some time getting to know her.

Over the course of the next week I send her short little text messages, just simple messages telling her what I'm doing, that I'm thinking about her and dropping big hints that I want to see her soon.

A couple of times she has actually called me, but I'm not ready to speak to her yet. I suppose part of me worries that she will recognise my voice (very doubtful because I've only spoken to her a handful of times) and also I need to know just what is happening with Garrett. I know nothing sexual or romantic is happening, I'm well aware of his preferences and Renee but I need to know she is not still pretending to date him. We have had such an unorthodox start that when we finally sit down face to face and talk I don't want any obstacles to still have to sort out.

Later In the week when I'm having a quiet drink with Emmett in Jasper's bar I can tell he is itching to ask me something, he's like a little boy who can't sit still.

"Spit it out Emm, what is the matter or has Rosalie spanked you so hard you can't sit still?"

"I'll have you know my Rosie never spanks me that hard, she likes to see rosy cheeks, not bruised ones".

"Well that is far too much information and a picture my imagination didn't need" I said as I took a large drink of my beer.

"I need to ask you about Garrett and this Renee because if he is cheating on Bella I feel I should tell her, I really don't want her to get hurt" he said as his eyes never left the table top, strange why wouldn't he look at me?

"Emmett I don't think you have anything to worry about, last I heard at the party Garrett was ready to dump Bella and I only know about Renee because I've been to the club."

"You see that's it, I've spoken to Rosie and pieced together what happened. I did know he had fucked someone the night he'd taken Bella out, but I thought that was after he had taken her home, you know, I thought he had called one of his posse of women he keeps dangling and they had come over."

"Emmett what I'm about to tell you has to stay between us ok? Garett does not have a posse of women, in fact Garrett doesn't have any women, including Bella because they don't have the extra bits that he needs". I raised my eyebrows and nodded at my crotch.

Emmett looked at me for a minute, he watched my eyebrows and then looked down at my crotch, I could physically see the cogs turning in his brain, he was processing what I'd told him and he was trying to make some sense.

"All that talk in the locker room and at the bar, are you telling me that all those stories and all those different women are fake?" he asked.

"I can't say for certain they are fake, in fact Garrett may like women I really don't know I'm as confused as you are, but I can honestly tell you that he loves the men just as much, and I am sure that Renee is a man with boobs" I tried to explain.

This seemed to send Emmett over the edge, he was bouncing in his chair, and I could tell he was bursting to tell me something.

"Edward, I have to tell you this. Bella isn't going to see Garrett anymore, she's going to tell him she wants to be single and she is looking to meet a man. Now I'm sure that is just a reason to finish with him but I wanted you to know. Also for the record can I just say it's fucking killing me keeping your secret about Bella. Rosalie knows I'm hiding something, hence the red buttocks. I've had more spankings this week than I had when I was a boy."

"Well thanks for letting me know but how do you know?"

"I have to listen to the nightly phone calls as Rosalie tries to get Bella to realise that she is being used. I try not to take too much notice but Rosalie can be quite persuasive" he grinned.

"How does Bella feel about Garett, it is just a front thing isn't it?" I asked him, I needed to know about the Garrett situation.

"Oh believe me I've listened to enough calls to know that Bella has no feelings for Garrett other than trying to help him with his image. "

Ok well if that is the case I'll call her and ask her out ok, soon I promise."

"Thank fuck for that I don't think my ass could take much more paddling, damn my Rosalie is so ….."

"Enough Em, I don't need to know anything else" I put my hand across his mouth to shut him up.

That seemed to calm him down and he settled down some, Jasper joined us and we talked about how he and Alice were getting on and whether they were having any more problems with her parents. The night was quiet and while I was active in all the conversations I had half a mind on Bella and what I was going to say to her.

Later the following day I had come up with a plan, I was going to invite her to diner as MM but be In the restaurant picking up a take out, so when MM didn't show I could go and talk to her and start to get to know her. I know it was sneaky but I wanted her to know me, Edward, not the idea she had of the mystery man in the dark room.

" _ **HI SG, It's been a hell of a week, and I've thought about you a lot, would you like to meet for dinner tomorrow?" MM**_

I sent it before I could change my mind, the ball was in her court now she could meet me or not.

" _ **Hi MM I'd love to meet you for dinner, it's time we met, tell me where and when. SGx**_

Ok so she was ready to meet me, but by me I meant MM, not Edward, so it's time to find out how she feels about Edward.

" _ **Meet me at The Willows at 8.00pm, do you know it? MM xx"**_

" _ **Yes I know it, see you there SGx"**_

I love the way she sends me a little kiss after each message and doesn't type in text speech which drives me insane. Clearly, like me, she believes in the sanctity of the written word. So, she has agreed to meet me, now all I have to do is talk her into staying at the restaurant to talk to me when MM stands her up.

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Well at least the first meeting is set up now, not quite sure it's the right way for Edward to start things off but we'll see.

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Thank you to AG who has just returned loads of chapters to me, and to Edlovesme for her thought on the latest chapters.

Also please make sure you are reading Ladyletters new posting chapter 3 is up.


	42. Deprivation Chapter 42

Deprivation chapter 42

BPOV

I'm on a real downer after the engagement party, now don't get me wrong I'm so happy for Alice and Jasper but it just makes me think about my life and how alone I am. Now that Rosalie and Emmett are together every night, I know it won't be long before they take that next step and officially move in together. What do I have? A mystery man I could walk past on the sidewalk and not even realise it was him, a fake relationship with a man who is living with a scary psycho in secret and lots of very inquisitive meddling friends who think I'm having a wild fling with a macho soccer player. This is all getting so confusing, I just want it all to go away. Ok maybe not MM but the rest, but whatever happens it's time to make some changes.

I was trying to work out what to say to Garrett and I knew he was going to be difficult because he wanted me as cover. I had to be honest though, we hadn't spent any time together with his teammates and I think most of them thought Izzy was a different woman anyway because they knew me as Bella. I had just worked up the courage to call him when I got a text from my Mystery Man

" _ **Hi SG I was thinking about you and just wanted to say hi MM"**_

It solidified my thoughts instantly, I was not going to continue with the farce I'd created, I needed to find my Mystery Man and if he wasn't open to a proper relationship, or he couldn't have one, then I needed to move on and find someone who wanted me for me. I don't know why but I suddenly realised that it was quite a high possibility that MM was married or in some form of open relationship. Why would a single man need to join the club? Then again I suppose the anonymous sex thing was quite a kink, I mean who in their right mind has sex with a stranger? Oh shit that was exactly what I had done; I'd had sex with a stranger, so who am I to judge?

After several calls and many late night texts with Rosalie I finally called Garrett and told him that I was done. I think he was really relieved actually, all the time I was on the phone to him I could hear Reggie in the back ground giving him loads of aggro because he was talking to me. What was his problem? I was supposed to be making their lives easier but by the sound of it well it certainly wasn't easier for Garrett anymore. In the end I just told him that he should just go public because he was going to lose Renee soon if he didn't acknowledge her publically.

"I know Izzy, but it's a big decision and I have a lot to weigh up. What she doesn't seem to grasp is that all the press attention will be focused on her, not me, especially when they realise she is pre-op. She will take all the backlash from social media as well, they could really hate her or me or both of us. I'm not stupid I know most people won't give a shit but some will and those are the people I want to protect her from, I couldn't bear it if she was hurt because of me".

I couldn't argue with that, but I was relieved that Garrett was thinking about it all, it was the first time I had ever heard him refer to Renee as anything other than a fully fledged woman, so I knew he was serious. He really loved her, that much was obvious and even though I was feeling slightly jealous it made me even more determined to look for my Mr Right.

Over the course of the next day my mood improved slightly, the weight of Garrett was lifted off my shoulders and I'd told the girls Garret and I were all finished. They took the news just as I imagined, any excuse for us to go out and party so we could find my next conquest, that was decided as soon as they realised I was fine and not affected by the 'split' at all.

Another thing that lifted me were the texts I kept receiving from MM, just little notes to tell me he was thinking about me or what he was doing ,the only down side was I tried to call him a couple of times but he didn't pick up. That pointed towards the 'can't have a relationship' school of thinking so I was getting myself ready to deal with that.

That afternoon I was doodling whilst sitting at my desk, to be honest I couldn't concentrate on the manuscript in front of me because it was truly awful. Whoever had forwarded this to me from within the office really needed to think about their career choice! Badly written we could sort out, grammar and punctuation we could sort, we could even sort out too many words or not enough but an awful actual topic we couldn't do anything about. I threw the manuscript to one side and picked up my phone, it was Thursday and while the girls had nothing arranged officially, one of them was always up for a night out.

Several phone calls later and I was going to the cinema and then for pizza with Irina and Kate. It would be an easy night and seeing as I could immerse myself into the film I wouldn't have to think about anything.

I stepped out of the shower and started to get ready, it was a casual night so jeans and a sweater would be fine. I quickly dried my hair and scraped it up into a high ponytail and just put a little lip gloss on. As I made my way out of the door I felt my phone buzz so as soon as I settled in the cab I checked it.

I was amazed to see another text from MM

" _ **HI SG, It's been a hell of a week, and I've thought about you a lot, would you like to meet for dinner tomorrow?" MM**_

Well that was a surprise, deep down I never really expected to actually meet him, I think I had come to terms with him being unavailable outside the club. I decided there and then to just face it and I answered straight away

" _ **Hi MM I'd love to meet you for dinner, it's time we met, tell me where and when. SGx**_

His response was swift

" _ **Meet me at The Willows at 8.00pm, do you know it? MM xx"**_

I knew that restaurant, it was quite trendy and had a really good reputation, I hadn't eaten there before so I was quite excited. Also, another 2 kisses, it was like his sign off from texting, and I liked it.

" _ **Yes I know it see you there SGx"**_

Well that was a surprise, it is a popular restaurant with a good reputation, not somewhere you would go if you were trying to keep a low profile. I suppose that moved mystery man from 'can't have a relationship' to 'open relationship status' so it was time to talk to him.

I went out during my lunch hour the following day to see if I could find a new outfit, I wanted to wear something new, it was stupid really because every time I been anywhere near this man I'd been naked, he hadn't seen me in any of my wardrobe. I just wanted to make a good impression, I found a wonderful red silk wrap dress with black edging that really accentuated my curves and feeling totally sexy in it I also treated myself to a fabulous lingerie set of the same colour.

I left the office early, they owed me so many hours no one would dare moan, and took my time getting ready. I wanted all of my personal armour in place, you know the make- up mask, my hair teased to with an inch of its life and once I was dressed my highest black fuck me heels. I felt feminine, sexy and strong, I was going to get some answers and see if there was a chance for me and my Mystery Man.

I got to the restaurant at 7.55pm and made my way to the hostess station, it was only then I realised I had no idea what name it was booked in, we only knew each other by nicknames. I looked at the hostess and just went with my instincts,

"Hi I'm meeting at friend here with an 8 o'clock reservation; it will probably be under the name Mr Mystery". It was all I could come up with.

"Yes we have a booking, your guest isn't here yet, would you prefer to wait in the bar, or at the table?" she asked.

I knew I'd feel more comfortable sitting at the table so it was an easy decision. "At the table please" I told her and I started to follow her through the restaurant. It was pretty busy but it was Friday night.

"Would you care for a drink while you are waiting?" she asked

"I'll have a glass of white wine please, the house one is ok for the time being" I didn't want to order a bottle in case I had to make a quick exit, this certainly wasn't the sort of place I could ask them to put the cork back in so I could take it home with me!

A waiter brought over my glass of wine and I made myself comfortable. I could see the hostess station and while I wouldn't recognise him as such, I could see any single males coming into the restaurant. I sat and as I started to look around I caught sight of a very distinctive head of hair. I'd recognise that colour anywhere. Jasper & Emmett's gorgeous friend Edward was in the bar and I watched as he ordered a drink and sat on a stool at the bar. I was very tempted to go and talk to him, but I didn't want to be away from the table talking to him when Mystery Man came in, that wouldn't look very good, plus there was no way he wasn't going to be meeting someone on a Friday night. Thinking about MM I checked my watch, it was now 8.10pm and he was late, I hate lateness there is no need for it. I checked my phone to see if I had missed a text or something but no there was nothing.

I looked at the screen trying to decide whether to call him or not, I didn't want to appear over anxious but surely he would let me know if he wasn't coming. As I sat staring at my phone I realised someone had walked up to the table, looking up it was the hostess with a smug look on her face

"Will your guest be joining you or are you going to dine alone? I have a waiting list for tables if you aren't stopping" she said with such a snide sarcastic tone and a smirk on her face that I literally went from calm to explosive in less than a second, just as I was on the verge of lecturing her on the merits of customer service and that old adage the customer is always right, I saw Edward approaching the table.

"Hi Bella, I'm so sorry I'm late, please forgive me" he said as he pulled out the chair and went to sit down.

"If you have finished annoying my friend , any chance you could bring over the wine list and some menus please?" he said as he dismissed her expertly.

As soon as she walked away Edward leant over the table to whisper to me.

"Sorry I couldn't help but overhear her talking while I was at the bar, she was hoping you weren't stopping so she could get the table for someone who had given her a large tip the last time they were here. As soon as I saw it was you I came over to check you were alright. So while I'm here shall we order some wine while we wait for your date to arrive?"

I was a little stunned; my first thought was that Edward was MM but that little speech ruled that out.

"What are you even doing here? Oh, sorry that sounds all wrong, are you meeting someone here? I don't want to keep you from your date." I looked round for an angry female glaring at me but I couldn't see one.

"Oh I live near here and when I want to treat myself I pick up take out, I know the chef so he packages me up whatever and it is still warm when I get home." He explained.

I looked at my watch again it was nearly 8.20pm, he obviously wasn't coming so why shouldn't I make the best of things, dinner with Edward could be nice, give me chance to get to know him a bit and let's face it's not a hardship to sit and look at him for an evening.

"You know what Edward, he's missed his chance tonight. How would you like to stop and have dinner with me? I'm led to believe the food here is excellent."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooWell what do you think of Edward now ?


	43. Deprivation Chapter 43

Deprivation Chapter 43

EPOV

"I'd love to join you Bella if you are sure" I really hoped she would be, after all she had extended the invitation.

"Of course I'm sure, why should I miss out on this beautiful restaurant and your company just because someone didn't have the manners to explain his absence?"

Shit I really needed to make that right because I wasn't ready for Mystery Man to disappear altogether just yet. I needed to win her over, not just let her settle for me because MM kept disappointing her. I knew that I needed to get a text to her as soon as possible from him.

"Have you been shown a menu yet?" I asked her as I looked around for our waiter.

"No not yet, I was waiting for my date" she said blushing heavily. I suppose she was embarrassed he hadn't shown up and that was something else I needed to change quickly if this was going to work.

"Hey don't be embarrassed, you are here, he's not. His loss is my gain and he's the asshole who didn't show." I tried to tell her.

"I'm just going to get my drink from the bar and see if I can find some menus" I told her as I got up from the table. I wasn't really going to get either, but I needed to be away from her but somewhere I could see her . Luckily because of the way the bar was designed I could see her reflection in the mirrors, but she couldn't see me so I quickly sent her a text.

 _ **SG I'm so sorry I'm late and I'm afraid I won't make it tonight. My car has broken down and I'm stranded outside the city. Please forgive me and I'll be in touch soon to rearrange our first meeting MMxx**_

I stayed at the bar long enough not to be suspicious but to watch her, she took out her phone and read the text and frowned, I was trying to read her expression but it was closed and very tight. I wasn't sure if she was angry, upset or annoyed. I watched as she typed a response and waited for it to hit my phone.

 _ **MM I'm really annoyed you waited so long to let me know you weren't coming, it's really bad manners to leave a lady sitting in a restaurant on her own. SG**_

I smiled at her response, it was almost a put down, a reminder that he was dealing with a lady and not some silly girl. I toyed with the idea of responding but decided I'd rather be sitting with her talking than playing text tennis so I grabbed a drink the barman had put in front of me and went back to her.

"The waiter came over and bought the menus while you were at the bar, it all looks delicious. What do you recommend?" she asked.

For a minute I was stunned why she would ask that, but then I remembered I'd told her I was a regular here. It was a slight exaggeration because while I'd been a few times it was nowhere near enough to recommend anything.

"Well that depends on what you like to eat, I mean I really don't know anything about your tastes, so let's see, are you vegetarian, vegan, on some stupid carb free diet, pescetarian or allergic to anything?"

She looked at me as if I'd just spoken in a foreign language before busting out laughing. It was an amazing sound that filled the air around us, it made me smile and want to laugh too.

"Apart from the fact that I don't even know what one of those actually is, I'm happy to inform you that I'm none of the above so we can have anything, oh other than artichoke, I hate artichoke" she said still smiling at me.

"Well that's settled then, the steak here is amazing and I'm really hungry so how about two thick steaks with a peppercorn sauce and some vegetables" I suggested and looked at her for approval.

"Would you be totally mortified if I ordered the steak with fries and a house salad and loads of onion rings?" she said closing the menu and putting it down in front of her.

This time it was my turn to laugh, "that is exactly what I fancied but I was trying to be a bit more refined" I admitted and picked up the water jug and filled our glasses.

Once we had ordered our food and a bottle of wine, I sat back and took a good look at her. She was simply stunning and great company. I'd seen her several times over the last couple of months, in the bars and clubs and most recently at the engagement party but what I realised was that in all the times I'd seen her whether at DESIRE or just when we were out with our friends, I'd never really spoken to her. In fact it dawned on me that had made more of an effort to speak to her I would have recognised her scent and known a lot earlier who she was. As it was I knew her body far better than I knew her and for the first time probably ever, I wanted to change that because I wanted to know her.

We chatted about Emmett and Rosalie, Alice and Jasper and finally Garrett. I was surprised that Alice and Jasper had managed to hide everything for so long from Emmett and myself, it seemed everyone else around them had guessed. Bella was honest about Garrett, she explained that she had told him she didn't want to see him anymore but wouldn't explain why. Of course she wasn't to know that I knew about Garrett and Renee, in fact at this point she had no idea I had even been to DESIRE. This was my next quandary, did I tell her? If I didn't and Emmett or Jasper said anything it could ruin everything. Hell even Garrett had seen me on that first night in the bar. If I did tell her, would she admit she was a member too? It was too confusing for tonight so as the waiter placed our entrees before us I raised my glass to salute her and then dug into my food.

She was a very intelligent woman, that was obvious, I'm not being patronising or anything but the few dates I have been were about eating, drinking and fucking , usually in that order and happened while I was still in college. I hadn't had, what you would class as, a proper adult date since I'd been out here in the real world of grown- ups.

Bella was fun to be around, we never really stopped chatting all the way through the meal, for once it wasn't just me nodding where I thought I needed to like I do with my Mother, I actively participated in the discussion. We talked about her family, her schooling and her job before I told her all about my new club and the one that I already had. She was surprisingly understanding of the philosophy of my business, I know some people just assume it's an up market brothel or that I'm a misogynist, but she could see the how the idea and the story about Emmett had led to my business decision.

As we finally put our coffee cups down I looked around and realised we were the last in the restaurant. I laughed and pointed this out to her as I called for the bill.

"Please let me pay Edward, after all I invited you to join me" she said placing her hand on mine on the table.

Instantly the goose-bumps broke out all the way up my arm and I felt myself shudder. It was both satisfying to feel my instant response to her, it was real after all and not just a symptom of the whole club experience and frightening that she had such a powerful effect on me.

"Bella my mother would never forgive me if I let a lady pay on a date, so, no you can't get this, it is on me" I told her.

"Well technically it's not a date is it and even if it was I invited you remember" she said reaching for the bill fold and slipping her credit card inside. The waiter was obviously so desperate to get us out of the restaurant so they could close up that he whisked the card away before I could even counter the argument. She sat with a huge smirk on her face that I just wanted to wipe off with kisses until she was moaning out loud.

"Well I can honestly say this is a first Miss Swan. I have never had a lady buy me dinner before, so maybe you would let me return the favour, would you like to go out with me for dinner tomorrow night?" I wasn't messing about anymore, I wanted to know her properly and maybe just maybe this was my chance at something more than an anonymous fuck in an alley or a dark room. We may have started like that but I had a feeling we could make this more.

"But it's Saturday night tomorrow, a single gentleman like yourself surely has a hot date or somewhere important to be?" she said as she put her credit card back in her bag and stood to leave the table.

"No no plans, since Emmett and Jasper both ditched me for the women in their lives I don't get up too much" that wasn't technically quite true, the last three Saturday nights I'd been with her at DESIRE but well…

"I have to check something, why don't you give me your number and I'll call you in the morning if that's ok?"

Now this was a problem, I couldn't give her my number because then she would know I was MM, I had to think fast.

"Why don't you give me your number as I have a couple of meetings at the club in the morning and most of the areas I will be in are classed as technology free so I won't have my phone on me. I'd hate to miss you so let me call you and arrange a time for us to go out" I hoped I didn't sound too desperate or that I was swerving giving her my number.

She looked at me for a few seconds and I could see the emotions swimming about on her face, she was trying to decide something and for a few seconds I was sure she had rumbled me. I waited for her to ask but when she finally spoke I let out a huge sigh of relief.

"Ok Edward, give me your phone and I'll put my number in so you can call me tomorrow"

"It's okay just tell me I have a great memory for numbers " I really couldn't chance her seeing anything on my phone relating to SG.

"Need to remember lots of cell phone numbers do you?" luckily I could see the smile she was trying to supress, she was teasing me thank fuck.

"No not at all, I am just good at remembering numbers, test me if you don't believe me" I taunted her, she was really onto a loser here, I already had her number imprinted on my brain, fuck I'd gone to dial it about ten times everyday since she had given it to me.

"OK I believe you , my number is" and she reeled it off.

Thankfully it was the same number I had , she wasn't using a second cell or anything stupid like that for her contact with MM. I repeated the number back to her and she laughed.

"Ok I believe you, now I need to get a cab and go home so goodnight Edward"

I was standing on the sidewalk trying to decide if I should offer to walk her home, but she caught me out by stepping forward and wrapping her arms around me in a big hug. I was immediately surrounded by her glorious scent. It was pure heaven, because of her height my nose was buried in her hair and all I could smell was strawberry. My poor dick acted on instinct was solid by the time I took my second big breath in.

"Edward, are you sniffing me?" Bella asked as she pulled her face away from my chest.

"You smell incredible just like strawberries it's so strong" I shut up quickly at that point, I'd already nearly dropped myself init.

"Oh it's a special shampoo I use, I know it is quite a strong aroma, but I love it." She was busy stroking her hair now and all that did was send the aroma out into the air around us some more. My poor dick was weeping now, trying to reach her and I had to adjust the bottom half of my body away from her. We must have looked really weird to any people passing by, we were basically hugging but my bottom half and her top half were arching away from each other. I quickly released her and turned to hail a cab. Luckily there was one passing so I flagged him down and opened the door for her.

"I'll call you in the morning Bella, I look forward to us going on our first date tomorrow night" I said as I closed the cab door not giving her the chance to correct me.

As I watched the cab drive off I knew I needed to see if she would respond to some flirting by Mystery Man so whilst I was walking home with a smile on my face I decided to text her.

 _ **I'm so sorry about tonight SG, let me make it up to you tomorrow night MMxx**_

I knew it was a big gamble but if we were going to get to know one another she had to choose me and by me I meant Edward not MM.

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Happy New Year to you all. I hope 2016 is a fab year that brings you all your dreams and desires.


	44. Deprivation Chapter 44

First up can I please apologise to anybody who reviewed and didn't get a reply thanking them. I tried to pm everyone but I know some will have snuck through. I appreciate you all taking the time and I love reading your reviews. We are sitting at 449 as I'm getting ready to post this so thank you, thank you, thank you.

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 44

BPOV

I was in the cab on my way home from what was probably the best non- date I'd ever had. Edward was warm and funny, he was really good company and very, very sexy. It's just typical after a drought of decent men that had gone on forever, I finally find two, who for very different reasons totally intrigue me.

The smile on my face as I sit in the cab is definitely for Edward though. I've had a really good night but then I start to think about the stories Emmett has told me, about him being unable to connect to anyone, that he was a serial one night stand guy who never went back for a second anything. (Maybe that was why he was funny about his phone, he was obviously very wary about giving it to me. I suppose someone as gorgeous as him would have a phone full of numbers and didn't want me to see). Well he seems to be changing that for me, we could be on for a second date tomorrow. I tried to work out what had made me hesitate to just agreeing to going out with him tomorrow and right on cue the reason popped up on my phone.

 _ **I'm so sorry about tonight SG, let me make it up to you tomorrow night MMxx**_

Well that's a surprise, I really thought he was chickening out of meeting me, I went through the reasons why he hadn't turned up in my head. Maybe he got to the restaurant and there had been people in there he knew, (that would stack up for the married theory) or maybe he was at the club and he had had a better offer, (open relationship theory). Either way I'd come second place so that wasn't a good start. Then again he could have genuinely broken down, cars do that ,I really didn't know.

It was too much to deal with right now. I'd had a good time tonight and if I'm honest I wanted to get to know Edward a little more so I was going to see where it could go, if Emmett was correct Edward probably wouldn't want to see me after tomorrow anyway.

 _ **Sorry MM I already have plans for tomorrow, maybe you've missed your chance at a meeting SG**_

That should keep him quiet for a day or two, I could always do a Rosalie and pick it up later if I needed to experience another mind blowing orgasm.I'll admit that was going to be hard to go without, what MM could do to my body was just amazing and there was no hope of recreating it with any of my toys. I wondered what Edward would be like in bed and smiled because something told me he wasn't another James. I tried then to remember why Emmett had ruled him out of the original line up when we were discussing potential fuck buddies for me, I suppose that didn't bode well either if Emmett had no faith in his skills.

My phone bleeped again and I was half expecting it to be Edward but it was MM

 _ **Well I'll be waiting SG, just let me know when you are ready to give me another chance MMxx**_

Well that text was a surprise, I expected him to take the easy way out and just leave it, maybe he wasn't attached after all.

I slept well that night even though I was definitely sexually frustrated, I did try to masturbate but my clit clearly wasn't awake, apparently I've now totally lost the secret code to waking her up.

As I sat at my Island in the kitchen the next morning having my first coffee I was thinking about Edward and trying to decide whether or not to call Rosalie and let her know what had happened. I knew it was early and she would still be in bed, but that wouldn't stop her calling me.

"You had better be dying, need bailing out or be pregnant bitch, nothing else is important enough to call and disturb me this early" was the charming greeting she answered the phone with.

"Well good morning to you to my friend, get up and go and put the coffee machine on I need to talk to you, ring me back when you're alive" I could hear her swearing and cussing as she tried to move in bed. Next I had to listen to her telling Emmett to move, she needed to get up.

"This had better be important he was just getting to the good stuff" she said as I heard her moving about her bedroom.

"It is, shall I ring you back in five minutes when you're awake and had you first caffeine fix?"

"No you can bear with me while I get organised but I suggest you need to move the phone away from your ear now unless you want to listen to me pee"

"I can live without hearing that, shout me when you've done" I said as I went to put the phone on the counter top.

Just as I did I could hear Emmett shouting in the background, something about why I could listen to her pee when he wasn't allowed to. Too much information for this time in the morning, I freshened my coffee cup and popped a bagel in the toaster. I could hear Rosalie shouting so I picked up my cell again. This time though she was shouting at Emmett, I just caught the words 'golden showers' so I quickly slammed my cell back on the counter and shuddered. That I didn't need to picture at any time of the day, never mind first thing.

"So I'm here and have coffee so what's up?" Rosalie asked as I started on my second cup of the day. I told her all about my night, being stood up by MM, Edward being there and having dinner with him and then arranging to maybe meet him tonight. I also told her about the texts from MM.

"Well you certainly had an interesting evening, let me mull over all that while I ingest some caffeine, in the mean time I meant to ask you, if you are not seeing Garett anymore are you going to continue using your membership at the club ?"

"I'm not sure, in his note MM said that he wouldn't be returning to the club again but that could just be a way to distance himself from me, let's be honest I wouldn't know him if he was stood next to me in Starbucks."

"You kinky bitch, you and Edward are well matched really, he doesn't usually ask their names either" Rosalie laughed.

"Can you remember why Emmett ruled him out of the shortlist in the first place, as I remember it he was never an option" I was curious and I knew Rosalie would have been also.

"I asked Emmett that after I met Edward for the first time because I mean he is yummy to look at isn't he? Emmett told me he didn't include him because Edward wasn't into dating and looking after women, he is more of a' fuck em and leave em dude' well that's Emmett interpretation anyway."

"Do you think I should go out with him tonight if he calls?"

"Definitely I mean even he has to realise that he can't avoid you after tonight, while ever Em and I are together then you are going to be on the fringes of his life at all sorts of social events. Why would he shit on his own door step? He must have given that some thought before he actually considered asking you out."

I could see here reasoning, even if she had given me another image I didn't need.

"Ok well I'll see if he calls, I'll let you know if he does"

"Alright sweetie will you be in the tea shop later?"

"Maybe I haven't spoken to Bree for a couple of days so no doubt we'll be there if she has time, or isn't working"

I hung up and was just about to wash my cup when the phone rang again. I looked at the caller ID but I didn't recognise the number so I very nearly ignored it, but then I thought it could be Edward, as his number wasn't in my phone. I quickly hit accept and said hello.

"Good morning Bella. I'm not calling too early am I?"

His voice was just as silky on the phone as in person and I had a very strange reaction to him saying my name, I was moist in areas that were very rarely moist, in fact there was definitely a grin down there.

"It's ok Edward I've been up for a little while, what are you doing up so early?"

"Oh I had some errands to run this morning so I was up and out as soon as the shops were open, now I want to know am I making reservations for dinner tonight?"

"I'd love to join you for dinner tonight Edward, text me the name and address of the restaurant and I'll meet you there" I didn't want to impose so I thought this was the safest way to play it if he wanted to disappear pretty quickly after the meal.

"Not a chance Bella, that's not how I operate! I will pick you up at 7.30pm, now do you have a favourite cuisine?"

"No not really I'll eat most things, but if were going for something messy like Taco's or burgers and fries I'll need to dress accordingly, I'm a messy eater and it will end up all round my face" I was hoping he realised I was joking but the groan that came down the phone made me think I'd affected him in some way.

"I've had a better idea Bella. Would you like to come and see how my new club is progressing and we could make an afternoon of it before heading out to dinner?" He offered.

"I'd love to Edward, what time will you pick me up then?"

"I'll be there around one o'clock, text me your address and I'll come up and get you".

After saying goodbye, I quickly sent him my address and started to think about what I needed to do today. I had brought some work home with me which I needed to do before Monday and at some point I need to do grocery shopping and laundry.

Throwing the laundry in the machine, I picked up a manuscript and started to make some notes as I skimmed through the first couple of chapters. It was ok and would probably sell, but it would need some work and I very much doubted it would be a on the top ten best seller list. The second one was worse and I never got past the first chapter. The third was however amazing, a murder mystery that had me hooked from the first page. It was only the washing machine finishing that made me realise I'd lost over an hour to the manuscript. After putting a big yes on the front page I put all three manuscripts back in my work bag and rushed into the shower.

At one o clock I was dressed and ready to go and submerged yet again in the murder mystery, the entry phone rang and I knew that meant Edward was here. I answered and told the doorman to send him up and then I quickly collected my jacket and bag. I opened the door just as he walked up to it and I was shocked to see he had a huge bouquet of flowers with him.

"Hi Bella, these are for you, to say thank you for buying me dinner last night" he leant forward and kissed me quickly on the cheek as he handed me the flowers. They were beautiful, all red blooms, mainly roses and gerberas with some greenery and looked gorgeous.

"Thank you so much Edward these are beautiful, let me find some vases, please make yourself comfortable" I said as I pointed to the sofa.

I quickly split the bouquet into the three vases I had and placed them around my apartment, then I picked up my jacket and bag again.

"Ok I'm ready when you are, or would you like a drink before we leave?" I was trying to be a good hostess, luckily though he said we should get moving as he had to meet with his project manager.

When we got downstairs I was amazed when he walked up to a silver Aston Martin, it was a beautiful motor and very extravagant , I let him open my door for me and I got myself comfortable in the passenger seat. This was an extremely nice car and at some point I needed to ask him about it.

We set off and were just generally chatting about nothing and everything, he asked me what music I liked, what books, movies and whether I went to the theatre or not. We had a lot in common and the conversation flowed until I realised where we were actually heading. Now I'd only been to DESIRE late in the evening, but I knew where we were the instant he parked the car.

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EPOV

I wondered if she recognised where we were, if she had only been here after dark everything probably looks very different in the afternoon. I tried to carefully watch her expression as I pulled the car into a parking spot in front of my club and jumped out to help her. It was obvious from her expression she recognised the block we were on and I couldn't help but push her,

"Have you ever been over this side of town before Bella?"

"Yes I know where I am, I've been to a bar near here a couple of times" she replied, very clever answer really, because she had been in the bar of DESIRE.

"Oh so you know the neighbourhood then? I will maybe call on your knowledge when the time comes to promote the club as I was still trying to decide whether to advertise locally or not. What are the demographic ratios here, do you know?" I couldn't help myself, I shouldn't tease her but I wanted to see how she would react.

"Oh this is a mainly industrial area Edward. There are warehouses and small factory units dotted about not much residential, surely you are not relying on local business men as your clientele, because if you are you are in the wrong area for that here"

I stood with my mouth open, she had given the exact same answer as most of the so called experts I consulted on where to place my new club. I'd expected her to feign ignorance about the area but she had done the exact opposite. Looking at her I realised she was far more than just a pretty face and I was really looking forward to getting to know her properly.

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	45. Deprivation Chapter 45

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation chapter 45

BPOV 

Even though his club is far from finished I can already tell it will be amazing, it has all the new technology mixed in with old world charm, it will be relaxing but still bang up to date. I can really see how it could be a refuge from the outside world, Edward was definitely onto a winning business strategy and if he had any sense he would think about a sister club for women only.

I met Charlie, his project manager and Carlisle his architect who looked familiar but I couldn't place him for the moment, I knew it would come to me where I'd seen him before eventually. We went through all the floors and Edward explained in great detail what was going into every room and why. In the end we stayed at the property for three hours, talking constantly about each business decision he had made and why. He asked for my opinion on things and listened when I gave him my answers, and not just half listened but actually tool on board my ideas and suggestions. The time flew by and before I knew it was 5pm, if we were still going out to dinner somewhere really nice I needed to go home and get changed.

"So Edward are we still on for dinner tonight or have I talked your ears off and you are ready for a break from me?"

"Bella I'm very much looking forward to dinner. In fact I was wondering, how about I come to your place and wait while you get ready and then we can drop off at my place so I can do the same and go straight out from there?"

He looked very unsure at what he was suggesting and I couldn't work out if it was something to do with being at my apartment or his. Not wanting to push the issue I just sat quietly and watched him for signs. There was no doubt about it he was stunningly handsome, his features were very classical but that was thrown into disarray by the mop of unruly bronze hair, it was all different lengths and I couldn't work out whether he spent ages making it look as unkempt as it did, or whether it really was naturally wild. The anguish on his face looked painful, he was really concentrating or turning something over and over in his mind.

"We don't have to go to your apartment if you don't want too, you can drop me off and I'll meet you at the restaurant later if you'd like" I really wanted to spend some time with him so I was hoping he wouldn't accept.

"What no, of course I want to you to come to my home, I just, well, erm….. look to be honest, erm…. I've never invited anyone to my home before. I'm very private about my home life, I suppose it's my sanctuary so I don't invite people over very often."

"Edward it's fine, I understand, just drop me off at my place and we'll meet up later, honestly it's not a problem"

"No Bella I really want you to come to my home so please let's go and get ready".

We spent the rest of the journey in silence, I really wanted to reach out and put my hand on his leg, but I didn't dare, for some reason it just didn't feel right. Who was I trying to kid, what I really wanted to do was run my hand all the way up his leg and have a damn good grope at whatever he was packing in there, but the time wasn't right. We still had a way to go before we got to that stage and I wasn't ready to be his one night stand because if I was going to give up MM, it wasn't going to be for a quick jump, a mediocre orgasm or back to counting the cracks on the ceiling.

We finally pulled up at my apartment and for a second I wasn't sure he was going to get out of the car, but he did and he followed me upstairs. As soon as I opened the door and he followed me in I told him to make himself at home while I changed.

I quickly freshened up, re touched my make up to make it a little more dramatic and styled my hair. I slipped on a little black dress, some nude thigh highs and heels. I looked in my full length mirror, not bad, not bad at all, I thought as I picked up my wrap to shield against the night chill.

"Wow! You look amazing, and so fast, I was expecting you to take ages" Edward said as I did a little twirl in front of him.

"Not all women take ages to get ready you know, some of us would rather go out and enjoy ourselves instead of spending so long getting ready we miss most of the night" I told him with a smirk.

"Well that's me told, let's go then Miss Swan so we can get out on the town" he answered as he opened my front door and ushered me into the corridor.

I quickly looked round, making sure everything was turned off before walking out, he took my keys off me and locked the door before dropping my keys back into my hand.

We chatted as we drove over to his building and I knew just from looking at it, it was going to be lovely inside. He was a lot more relaxed than he'd been an hour ago so I let him just lead me along. His apartment was as stylish as I knew it would be, it oozed class, money and style, but money and style combined.

I took a stroll around while Edward went to get changed; I looked over his bookshelves and was pleasantly surprised to see a wide range of authors and titles. I was trying to work out what his taste was but it was so varied I couldn't narrow it down. I picked up a copy of Jane Eyre, one of my favourite books, and started to flick through to read my favourite parts. I made myself comfortable on the huge squashy sofa and disappeared into my favourite alternative world.

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EPOV

Shit this was getting complicated fast. From having to buy a new phone so I could hide the truth about my identity, to having to be very careful and think about everything I say and do in case I give myself away. I have to be guarded about my reactions and that is probably the hardest thing. I know her body, inside and out, I know the sound of the moans she makes when she comes, even though she was trying to be quiet. I want to hear her when she is totally uninhibited and naked spread on my bed.

I very nearly told her this afternoon when we were at my new club, I wanted to tell her I was MM and that I wanted , that is me Edward not MM, wanted her. Every time I was ready to try and explain she would ask a question or Charlie would re appear and explain something else to her. I chickened out of telling her while I was driving because it wasn't fair to lay that news on her while she couldn't step away if she needed to. Who am I kidding; I didn't want her hurting my baby, my Aston.

When I really think about it how do I broach the subject", Oh Bella, by the way I'm Mystery Man and I've known for a while now you're Strawberry Girl so how do you feel about us getting together outside of the club?" Was it that easy, could I just say that and let her answer. Trouble was I didn't want tonight to end just yet, I was enjoying myself too much.

As I finish getting changed I'm surprised how comfortable and relaxed I am that Bella is in my apartment. I thought I would be uptight and uncomfortable but it feels right. As I finished getting dressed and walked into the lounge area I was stunned by the scene before me. Bella was curled up on the couch reading, she looked as though she belonged here and had been there for ever. Instead of panicking and looking for a way to get her out of there as soon as possible, I could finally see what Jasper and Emmett had been talking about. I could see breakfast in bed, winter evenings curled up on the sofa, long weekends in bed and a future, for me, with someone special.

I shook my head to clear all the visions, it didn't really matter what I thought at the moment, if I didn't find a way to tell her I was MM we were going to have problems.

"Are you ready Bella?" I said as I picked up all my bits and bobs from the dish on the table in the hallway. My wallet, keys, condoms and change all there as usual. I saw her look at the condoms and blush, then look away. Shit I probably shouldn't have picked them up, but they do make me look responsible, but then they also make me look like I'm ready for anybody.

"Sorry habit I'm afraid, be prepared and all that" I was blushing, me blushing for fuck's sake.

"So were you a boy scout then, isn't it the boy scouts who are always prepared?" She had a large smirk on her face and I was glad to see her laughing at me and not annoyed.

"Oh I'm always prepared Bella and believe me I'm a very good boy as well"

She roared with laughter, it was totally natural and I couldn't help but laugh with her. "Come on let's go before I show you just how prepared I can be" I teased as I grabbed hold of her arm and pulled her towards the door.

"Wait, your book, I need to put it back on the shelf" she shouted as she tried to struggle away from me.

"Just leave it on the couch, I'll put it away later" I told her again trying to get her to move towards the door.

"No, no, no you don't treat books like that, it needs to be put back in its proper place".

I looked at her to see if she was being serious and I could tell from her expression she was.

"Ooook, if it is important to you then please go ahead and put the book back on the shelf"

I watch as she walks over to my book shelves and I can't help but wonder what attracts me more, watching that fabulous pert ass perched on top of those shapely legs or how natural the scene is, her walking around my most private space as if she belonged here.

"Ok we can go now" she says as she walks past me and drops a kiss on my cheek. As usual everything stands to attention and I curse that now I'm going to have to drive with a hard on.

I chose a restaurant for tonight that is a little off the beaten track, it was on the outskirts of the city and from the street looked quite low key. It was a real gem though and the food was incredible, I'd been a few times with Jasper and Emmett when Em wanted to get away from his public!

We had a table in the back corner away from the other diners and over the course of a couple hours I learnt more about this stunning woman. I now knew her aspirations and dreams, where she wanted her career to go and how she was planning on getting there. I talked to her as well, a lot, the best thing being that I knew she was interested in me and what I was saying. She asked questions, but never pried and when I said I didn't want to talk about my family she never pushed or tried to bring the subject again in a different way. We swapped stories about Emmett and Rosalie, each of us promising never to reveal the information to our close friends and we laughed as we admitted to previous bad partners and experiences. Everything was just so relaxed and easy.

The food was excellent, the wine good and the company enchanting, what more could I ask for? Other than to do it again, very soon. Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

BPOV

This had to be the best date I'd ever been on, he was attentive, intelligent, sexy as hell and he knew how to treat a lady, I really couldn't ask for more, so why was I wondering what MM was doing? Was he at the club, in the dark room or was he at home with his wife or partner?

I took a drink of my wine to try and clear my mind, I was having such a good time I wasn't going to dwell on it and spoil anything by worrying about something I had no control over. I did think fleetingly about texting MM but I dismissed it instantly, it would be so rude while I was out with Edward, so I sat back and gave him my full attention. The evening was just getting better and better.

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As ever my thanks and loads of hugs to AG and Edlovesme , also thank you to everyone who has reviewed, we have passed the 450 mark which is amazing thank you.


	46. Deprivation Chapter 46

Deprivation Chapter 46

BPOV

Two Weeks Later

Well no matter how good the first and second date were, the last two weeks have been ever better, we have been to the movies, been late night shopping, been to a museum and a gallery and had several very nice dinners. Edward is charming and attentive, he's been a gentleman and even though he is as sexy as hell, we have only really had a few very light make out sessions. If I didn't know better I would be suspicious as to his 'experience in the bedroom department', but I'm quite reassured from the steel rod I've felt pressed against me a couple of times that he can get it up.

In fact Rosalie has assured me that Edward is definitely not lacking in that department. I was a little concerned but she quickly reassured me that all her info was from Emmett and the many drunken nights out they had had. I still wasn't too sure about the information but hey I was having a good time with a very sexy man who seemed interested in me and I was happy to take my chances.

On the few times we had got hot and heavy though it was like he was holding something back. I was beginning to wonder if he was one of those men who needed to be in control and he was trying to ease me in slowly, either that or he was trying to do something different to what he normally did. I know I sound stupid, but after three guys who I could have predicted to the second when they changed position, direction or pressure, I know Edward was trying to be very careful with me. This in turn turned me on even more, I was dying for him to lose control and just take me, in fact my nights and day dreams were filled with visions of him taking me on my desk, in my kitchen, in his kitchen, in his club with the builders in the next room, in Jaspers bar, actually on the bar and just about every other flat surface I could imagine.

I was so wrapped up in Edward and what I wanted him to do to me that I hadn't even given any thought to MM, I hadn't been back to the club and I could honestly say I hadn't missed either. My days were filled with work and a few naughty daydreams, my evenings with either the girls or Edward and my nights with hot and heavy erotic dreams that would have shamed me if I could have remembered all the details the next morning.

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EPOV

Fuck I'm exhausted. I'm so grateful I don't have a normal office job, because I don't think my blood pressure could have coped with all the subterfuge I'm dealing with. I'm trying to stay away from my Mother, she has the perfect woman for me yet again, I'm avoiding Emmett because he wants me to spend time with his team mates and I can't afford for Garrett to recognise me from the club. I'm avoiding Alice because she has it in her head that Bella and I are perfect for one another and I'm just not ready to start sharing Bella and our growing 'relationship', whatever it is, with anyone yet. In fact the only person I want to spend time with is Bella and I have to be so careful with what I say and do that it is making me jumpy when I'm with her. The only part of me that seems to be relaxed is my dick and that keeps standing to attention any time it gets near her. I don't want to ruin all this by giving away I'm MM at the wrong time. I know I have to tell her, but I really don't know how to now. I'm starting to think I've left it too long and should just hope that she forgets about MM and just agrees to keep seeing me. I have sent texts to her again as MM but she hasn't answered and she has not agreed to meet MM, I would be seriously pissed now if she did agree to meet me/him! See I'm even having problems separating me and MM and I'm potentially jealous of myself. I need to get a grip.

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BPOV-

I'm looking forward to tonight, Jasper is reopening his bar after the refit and we are all going over to support him. All the girls are going to be there along with Emmett and most of his team mates. Jasper has redesigned the interior so it's a classic sport bar, I thought that was a bit naff but Edward and Emmett were overjoyed so clearly what do I know? Apparently Emmett and the team turning up was a huge event as well and I guess wouldn't hurt opening night sales and publicity.

I was going with the girls tonight and seeing Edward there, I wasn't really happy about that, to me it was the perfect opportunity for us to 'come out' to everyone and for us to go together, but he was happy for us to keep it quiet a little longer. What he doesn't realise is that I'm not about to be someone's dirty secret , I 've been there and done that with Garrett, so he gets one more chance before I start asking questions he will have to answer.

I make my own way to the bar and the place is heaving. Jasper has done a fabulous job and the space is not even recognisable as the same bar he closed down a while ago. He has taken down walls, moved the bar, added huge screens everywhere, completely refurbished the rest rooms and then decorated the bar with memorabilia and sports equipment. My first thought was that it was very 1980's but it was obvious the men loved it. They were looking in all the display cases and pointing at all the different things Jasper had collected.

I looked around the room and caught sight of Bree and Alice in a booth so I made my way over to them. As I got closer it was great to see that everyone was there and already having a good time. The girls were in fine form and it was a good half hour later that I finally got away to go and look for Edward. I found him behind the bar helping Jasper out, at least that explained why he hadn't come looking for me, he looked so out of place as he poured beer into pitchers and tried to work the till.

"Well pretty lady what can I get for you?" he asked as he caught my eye.

"Erm seeing as you are not safe with pitchers I'll wait and let Jasper serve me thank you, that way I can just admire the view" I knew I was flirting but really he looked adorable and quite flustered.

"Well I could be slightly put out at that remark, but seeing as I have already drenched you once, I'll let it go beautiful" he said as he leaned over the bar with a big smile on his face and kissed me on the lips.

Now why would he do that if he wanted to keep everything quiet? I was still contemplating that when I noticed Garrett was stood at the other end of the bar and staring at me. So Edward wanted to stake his claim did he, well I could help him with that.

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EPOV –

This place was heaving and it was still early, as soon as I walked through the door I could tell Jasper had a hit on his hands. The atmosphere was good, and with it still being quite early on in the night it could only get better. As soon as I got to the bar I could see Jasper was struggling, he was on his own, not a good idea with the number of people waiting for a drink.

"Edward I'm so glad you are finally here. Please get behind the bar and help me out will you? My bar staff haven't turned up yet, they are stuck in traffic or something"

Now it has been many years since I worked a bar. I did some work in my first year at College until my parents found out, and were mortified that a Cullen was working in an undesirable occupation and informed me if I 'felt the need to work' they would find me a suitable position elsewhere. Knowing that would be a position with either a friend of a friend, or something hideous to make sure I dipped into my trust fund instead, I agreed not to work, and they agreed to fully fund me. So with a huge breath to steady myself I jumped behind the bar to help out Jasper. Within ten minutes I was ok, I could get beer into the pitches without spilling any and I could add up a round and get it into the cash register. Time flew by and it wasn't until I saw my favourite brunette coming up to the bar that I realised I hadn't even said hello to her.

She came and stood at the bar and made some witty comment about me and pitchers and it was so natural. She was flirting with me and the smile on my face was mirrored by the smile on hers. I couldn't help myself so I leaned over the bar and kissed her smack on the lips. Just as I broke away from her I caught sight of Garrett looking at us from the end of the bar. The last thing I needed was a set to with him so I quickly went back to serving.

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BPOV

Well he's not biting. No matter how much I try and flirt with him he has stayed polite and detached so it's time for me to go and party a little with the girls. As I turn and walk towards them I can see Garrett has left the bar also. I really don't want to have any more to do with him so I try a little detour but the bar is just too busy.

"Izzy , Bella please wait I just want to talk to you" Garrett said across a few people as I was caught between the bar and the booth the girls were in.

"Garrett what is there to say? Just leave me alone will you, Renee will throw a fit if she knows you're talking to me and neither of us need to see that" I said trying to turn away.

"No wait please, I just wanted to say thank you, you have been nothing but kind to me and in return Renee and I have treated you appallingly. You helped me when I needed someone to cover for me and you helped me again when Renee had her little breakdown. I just want you to know how grateful I am" he said and with that Garrett swept me into his arms and gave me a huge heartfelt hug.

Now don't get me wrong the hug was well meant. I could tell Garrett was definitely just being friendly and in that moment I was sure I had made a new lifelong friend. We did get on when he was relaxed and away from the influence of Renee/Reggie and after what we had gone through for that few intense weeks I could see he really needed a friend who knew the real him.

It was at that point all hell broke loose and the shit hit the fan, the ceiling, the floor and the walls…..

"What the fuck are you doing with my man? How dare you put your filthy hands on him, get off him now" Renee/ Reggie screamed as she tried to pull me away from Garrett. It took me a few seconds to realise what was happening and by that time she had managed to break us apart and push me backwards. I started to fall and realising what was happening Garrett managed to grab and steady me.

"What part of take your hands off did you not understand you stupid prick?". This time her foul mouth was aimed at Garrett as she tried to make him remove his hands from my arms.

"Renee, darling, calm down, I was just talking to her, we're in a crowded bar for fuck's sake what do you think we were going to get up to?" Garrett was trying to be discreet but Renee was in full flow.

"I saw you, you weren't just talking you were hugging her and you don't get to hug anyone anymore but me, I've told you that before. Do you want punishing again, do I have to take you to the club and make sure you don't forget who you belong to?"

The colour drained out of Garrett's face as he looked at me, he was remembering the night I'd 'rescued' him and I could see the indecision on his face, did he stick up for me or save his ass. The pain was obviously still very much in the fore front of his mind and all notion of my friend standing up to Renee went out of the window.

"I'm so sorry sweetheart, you know I love you and only you, Izzy was just hugging me to say hello, that's all, this is the first time I've seen her in ages, isn't is Izzy?" he looked at me and the look on his face pleaded with me to understand and play along.

I couldn't believe he was so frightened of her, was that what it was? Was he frightened of her physically or that she was going to make a show of him in a very public place?

"Renee how lovely to see you again, as Garrett was saying I was just saying hello, nothing more, I haven't seen him in a while that's all" I tried to defuse the situation but it was too far gone, she was just not listening.

"Listen to me you filthy whore, keep your fucking hands off my fiancée , he is mine and you don't get to speak to him, look at him, touch him or even so much as breathe near him. DO I MAKE MYSELF FUCKING CLEAR?" she screamed in my face.

Now I'm not one to back down from an argument, I mean my job means I spend most of my day arguing with either authors or my work colleagues, but this, this was another level. I knew I needed to stop this quickly because the punters in the bar were starting to realise something was going on and as soon as the girls, especially Rosalie and Bree realised what was happening all hell would break loose, on top of that I was sure Garrett didn't want to introduce Renee to his team mates in this fashion.

"Look Renee, apart from the fact Garrett is totally in love with you, I don't have any of the extra bits that you have to satisfy him, so back off and stop causing a scene, this is a big night for Jasper and I'm sure you don't want to meet all of Garrett's team mates and their partners for the first time like this, do you?" I was really trying to stay calm and keep the peace.

"Are you seriously telling me that partners were invited tonight, that I could have accompanied him here?" she said before she turned to Garrett.

His already pale face went grey as I realised I had just dropped him further into the shit than he already was in. He looked at me for help but he was on his own for this one, I'd already done enough damage for one night.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and just as I was going to turn to see who it was, Renee looked past me and I watched as her face changed from recognition to surprise. She looked at me and back behind me and just stared. Curious I turned round to see Edward standing behind me "Is everything alright love, it looks a bit intense over here? " he asked as he squeezed my shoulder in reassurance.

Renee was still watching us, her eyes trying to take in everything, she was looking at me then Edward, his hand on my shoulder and then back to me and so on. Finally whatever she was trying to sort out clicked into place and she started to cackle.

"Well that just fucking tops my evening off. Not only do you flirt and put your hands all over my man when you get the chance, you manage to snare oneof the best looking men to come into the club in ages. What was it that attracted you to her in the dark? She asked Edward." It couldn't have been her looks or sparkling personality and I doubt she knows how to suck a dick properly" she spat, talking at me.

Now this confused me, what was she talking about, who had I snared as she so loving put it?

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When should I update again ?


	47. Deprivation Chapter 47

Deprivation Chapter 47

Ok because you all asked so nice and because we are only one review away from 500 and because Donna is sat on the train waiting for this …

BPOV

My head was beginning to pound, the music and noise of the bar, Renee screaming at me, Garrett just standing there like a wet lettuce and now Edward had joined the mix.

"Shut the fuck up Renee, or whatever your name really is. Bella has done nothing but help Garrett out, you should be grateful to her, not screaming at her like some out of control banshee" Edward was not a happy man and for a second I thought Renee actually looked a little ashamed. It didn't last long.

"What's the matter Edward do you have secrets you don't want the bar to know? Do they know where you spend your Saturday nights and what you like to do with strangers?" she taunted.

"Don't start with me Renee unless you are prepared to finish it, you have a much bigger secret than I do and yours could potentially cause huge problems for the man you're supposed to love"

Again I was lost, what could Renee know about Edward, in fact how did Renee know Edward at all?

"How do you know Renee Edward?" I had to ask but before he could answer Renee started again.

"Oh Izzy, maybe you are as stupid as you look, he knows me from exactly the same place you know me from, in fact I think you both became members the same night" She delivered that information with so much spite and glee I actually felt her words hit me, it took me a second but I did get it, Edward was a member at the club the same as I was.

"You're a member of DESIRE?" I asked him

"Yes Strawberry Girl I am".

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EPOV

I could see there was a disturbance brewing from where I was behind the bar and I looked for Bella to make sure she was ok but I couldn't see her. The music was so loud that I couldn't tell what the group of people were arguing about but I could just tell that it was kicking off. I looked over to the booth Rosalie was in and I still couldn't see Bella so I looked towards where Garrett had been standing and he had moved away from the bar. This just made the hairs on the back of my neck rise, something wasn't right and I just knew it was something to do with Bella. I jumped onto the bar top and a huge cheer went up because I think everyone thought I was going to do a Tom Cruise routine from Cocktail, but I just wanted to find Bella and make sure she was alright. As soon as I had a clear view I spotted Renee and she seemed to be screaming at Bella and Garrett. I watched for a second before jumping down and making my way towards them, accompanied by a few boos. If Renee was involved things would be going downhill fast, the 'woman' was a maniac.

"Are you seriously telling me that partners were invited tonight, that I could have accompanied him here?" I heard her say as I walked up behind a very tense Bella, her hands were clenched into fists and I was sure she was trembling slightly. I put my hand on her shoulder to let her know I was there and that I had her back if she needed me.

She turned to look who was behind her so I smiled at her asking "Is everything alright love? It looks a bit intense over here " I squeezed her shoulder in reassurance, hoping to calm her a little.

I knew the instant Renee recognised me, I hadn't really had that many dealings at the club with her, apart from that first night, but I suppose in her job it was a real help to remember faces, names and preferences.

As the recognition fell into place her face turned uglier than it already was and she started to attack Bella verbally, it was quite apparent that it wasn't the first time tonight. Before I could stop her, Renee made it quite clear she knew me from the club and that I had frequented the sensory suite, without even realising it Renee had just probably killed my budding relationship as much as she had killed her own. I looked at Garrett and I actually felt sorry for him, he had tears streaming down his face as he obviously witnessed the vindictive side of Renee that Bella had been warning him about. Whether he was ready to go public or not, it was about to happen in a very busy crowded bar in front of all his team mates.

"Shut the fuck up Renee, or whatever your name is, Bella has done nothing but help Garrett out, you should be grateful to her, not screaming at her like some out of control banshee" I was so angry that I really didn't give much thought to the consequences or antagonising an already out of control Renee, I just wanted her to shut up and leave Bella alone but that backfired sensationally as Renee went in for the kill

"What's the matter Edward do you have secrets you don't want the bar to know? Do they know where you spend your Saturday nights and what you like to do with strangers?" she taunted, again I gave no thought to how my answer would hurt anyone, I just went back at the bitch.

"Don't start with me Renee unless you are prepared to finish it, you have a much bigger secret than I do and yours could potentially cause huge problems for the man you're supposed to love"

I thought that would shut her up and for a second it did, I took a much needed breath and hoped that the bigger secret of MM and SG had actually been kept intact.

Just as I was going to lead Bella away she turned to me and asked the question I'd been dreading

"How do you know Renee Edward?" Bella asked and for a second I debated what to say. If I lied Renee would call me out on it, no doubt there, so I had to tell the truth, but how did I explain it here in the middle of the bar, in the middle of an argument. As it happened I took too long to answer and once again Renee's poison spilled out.

"Oh Izzy, maybe you are as stupid as you look, he knows me from exactly the same place you know me from, in fact I think you both became members the same night" The smile on her face was so vindictive, she loved the fact I obviously hadn't told Bella and she just stood and waited for Bella to process the information.

"You're a member of DESIRE?" she asked me, her face was a mass of confusion and emotion and I just wanted to take her in my arms and make all this go away. It probably wasn't the best time to do this but I knew I would never get another chance to tell her the truth, so I did what I needed to, knowing that she may never speak to me again.

"Yes Strawberry Girl I am".

Her reaction was instant, she took in a huge breath and slapped me across my face, the sting was instant and painful, but in a strange way welcomed because I deserved it. Then she turned around and looking straight at Renee she just stepped forward and said very quietly,

"I've been looking forward to doing this for so long"

With that she pulled back her arm and smashed her fist into Renee's face. Renee's legs just folded underneath her and she went down, hitting the floor in a crumpled heap. Bella stood there and watched before leaning over her and shouting in her face

"I would never normally do that to a fellow female, but seeing as you're a poor imitation and a fake, then I feel it was justified. You may have tits and nice hair Renee but you are still a man deep inside, no woman would treat another woman the way you just did". "Honestly I would much rather Garrett found himself a decent man and came out, he would be so much happier than having to put up with your poisonous personality, you are without doubt the vilest, most toxic, unhappiest person I have ever met and the sooner you are gone from my life the better"

By now the bar was deathly quiet except for the music playing through the speakers. Everyone had stopped what they were doing and the crowd around us had heard everything. Bella had just 'outed' Garrett all be it unintentionally, his team mates that were close by could not have missed what had just had happened.

Bella looked up and realised she was the centre of attention, looking at Garrett she smiled softly,

"I'm so sorry Garrett, I never in a million years meant to do that to you, it was your secret and I had no right to tell it, but please think very carefully about what you have witnessed here tonight, you will be so much better off without this bitter old witch".

She looked down at where Renee was still on the floor clutching her nose and turned to me with a very determined look on her face

"As for you, we'll speak later when I can bear to look at you. You can explain then how you knew who I was, but conveniently forgot to share that information"

With that she walked out of the bar and away from me.

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BPOV

Shit my hand hurts, as I sat in the cab on my way home I couldn't help but smile, what a night. I'd punched Renee, outed Garrett, slapped Edward and found out who MM was all in the space of a few minutes. My emotions were all over the place and I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, as my apartment building came into view laughter won and I started to laugh hysterically. The cab driver was a little worried, I could tell he was glad to unload me and as I walked into the foyer I caught my reflection in the huge mirror doors of the elevator.

I looked like a woman possessed, my hair was all over the place, my eye make-up had run from the tears streaming down my face and my nose was red and I was sure I was running. I hadn't even realised I was crying so for the first time since I was a little girl I wiped my nose on my sleeve and for some reason this made me laugh and cry even more, I really needed to get behind closed doors before I lost it completely.

As I closed my apartment door and double locked it, I slid down onto the floor and let everything out. I cried and laughed and occasionally flexed my probably sprained hand, all the time ignoring my phone that was ringing constantly.

I really wasn't ready to speak to Edward or the girls, I needed to try and process everything that had happened and then I had to deal with knowing Edward was my MM. For the first time since hearing him call me Strawberry Girl I admitted to myself that Edward was my Mystery Man. The pain in my chest was so intense I was scared for a minute that I was having a heart attack, it was only later I realised it was probably just my heart breaking. I literally crawled into the kitchen, took a bottle of vodka out of the freezer and after turning off my phone I climbed into bed , as I took my first mouthful of neat vodka, all I could think about was trying to clear all the crap out of my head , for the images and sounds of tonight to just disappear.

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EPOV

I tried to go after her, to stop her leaving but Rosalie caught me and pulled me back, "What the fuck just happened here, where is Bella and who is that?" she asked as she looked down at Renee.

"Rosalie I don't have time now, I need to stop Bella leaving" I said as I tried once again to leave.

"I wouldn't if I was you, she won't thank you for it, you need to let her process what has happened and she will contact you when she is ready. I heard what she said to you and you will only make it worse if you hound her now, believe me I know" Rosalie said.

We were distracted at this point by Renee making an attempt to get up, on her ridiculously high heels it was like watching Bambi on ice as she tried so hard to be dignified and lady like.

"Will someone please give me a hand? I'm the injured party here" she said as she held out her hand.

"I take it you're the infamous Renee Bella has been telling me about" Rosalie said as she held her hand out to Renee.

"I am and who are you?" Renee asked as shebrushed out her clothes and tried to smooth down her hair. I had a quick look at her face, luckily her nose wasn't broken but she would have a lovely bruise on her face by the morning.

"I am Bella's best friend, or Izzy as you know her and I'm also her lawyer so before you go any further just remember I have been in the bar all night and have witnessed everything that has happened tonight" The threat was quite clear in her voice and words.

As soon as Renee was on her feet Rosalie let go and turned away from her, looking at me she sighed and shook her head,

"You have really messed up, you should have been honest with her from the beginning, as soon as you knew who she was you should have said something" Rosalie rested her hand on my cheek and sighed again.

"I suggest you give some thought to grovelling and how you are going to win her round because believe me if you feel anything for her at all, you have one hell of a battle on your hands". She patted my cheek and walked away back towards Emmett.

"If I found out you knew he was the Mystery Man and you never told me, believe me you are going to be in so much trouble" Rosalie said to Emmett and the last image I have before I left the bar is of Emmett and the colour draining from his face as he tried to decide what to tell her.

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Garrett POV

Shit , shit , shit what the hell is going on here tonight? What should have been a pleasant evening with my team mates and some friends had suddenly turned into my worst nightmare. As I watch Rosalie and Edward walk away I know I need to make a decision, Renee is looking at me to acknowledge her.

As I look at her, this person who I thought I could spend the rest of my life with I suddenly saw her for the insecure, frightened, confused person she was.

"Renee go home, and by that I mean to your apartment because I don't want to see you tonight or tomorrow for that matter, I need time to sort myself out " I told her and for once she didn't argue, she just picked up her bag and walked out of the bar.

I had to speak to my team mates now, the bar wasn't the best place to do it but I couldn't put it off any longer. I asked Jasper if we could use the empty storage rooms upstairs and over the next hour I explained to them that I was and always had been gay. They were annoyed about all the stories in the locker room, but understood that it was difficult to be homosexual in such a macho orientated environment. The laughter and jokes started when I explained to the ones who hadn't guessed, that Renee was pre op and still had her man bits. Comments about having the best of both worlds were music to my ears as they laughed and joked and I suddenly felt very stupid and ashamed about not trusting my friends with my secret as soon as I had settled at the club. I could have saved myself a lot of heartache and sleepless nights.

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Author note :It seriously pisses me off that Garrett was the one who came out unscathed from all this, and I'm writing it .


	48. Deprivation Chapter 48

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

 _ **Before we start can a just say a great big thank you to everyone who has reviewed, there were a lot of new people over the last few chapters and I am very grateful. We passed the 500 mark on FF and also were nearing a 100 on TWCS something I never expected.**_

Deprivation Chapter 48

BPOV

I'd stayed in bed for two days feeling sorry for myself, I called work and told them I'd work from home so I was trying to read manuscripts but I couldn't concentrate. I knew I needed proper food, a shower and a change of clothes desperately but at this particular moment in time I didn't give a shit. I realised this morning I was still in the clothes, minus the boots, I'd gone to the bar opening in.

Rosalie had been around a couple of times but because I had had the foresight to double lock my front door she couldn't get in, my phone was still turned off because I really didn't want to speak to anyone but I knew I deep down I was running out of time. Rosalie, Bree and Alice would only give me so long and then they would find a way in to sort me out, so I knew that it was time to try and make a move.

My head hurt from the two bottles of vodka I'd consumed, apparently at some point I'd got to the kitchen and fetched the emergency bottle of vodka,(cheap and very rough and definitely only to be used in emergencies) some snacks and ice cream. I really didn't remember eating the pint of Ben and jerry's but seeing as I couldn't find a puddle of melted ice cream anywhere I must have!

With a huge effort I prised myself into a standing position and stripped everything off my body and the bed, putting the clothes and bedding into the hamper and I then started the shower. I really needed a long soak but as I felt so dirty I needed a good scrub first.

In the end I was in the shower for about half an hour, I scrubbed myself with my favourite exfoliator, I washed my hair several times and shaved all the stray hairs that had magically appeared. As I stepped from shower and wrapped myself in the warm towels I'd put on the rail, I continued my routine, cleaning my teeth vigorously and finally lathering lotion on my poor dehydrated skin. I wasn't ready to get dressed just yet, so I threw on a pair of clean pyjamas and scraped my clean but wet hair up into a high ponytail. I wasn't going anywhere so I really didn't need to do anything else.

All this activity had tired me out and for a split second I did wonder about going back to bed. It was only the thought of having to make it again that stopped me. I moved through to the kitchen and popped some pods into the coffee machine, as it brewed I also dug a pop tart out of the freezer. While I really didn't fancy all that sugar, three day old bread and bagels weren't very appetising either, cereals were also out because of the sour milk situation. The smell of the coffee and the sweetness of the tart caused my stomach to rumble so I gave in and made myself an omelette, luckily I had hard cheese and some veggies that were ok so I threw them into the pan.

As I forced the fluffy eggs and soft veg down my throat I also made myself swallow pain killers and juice and water. I needed rehydrating, between the crying, the alcohol, the sweat and all the snot I was feeling really rough. As soon as my coffee was cool enough to drink I moved into the main room and fired up my laptop. As I watched the inbox fill with messages from work, Rosalie and Alice I really couldn't be bothered so I closed the lid quickly. My phone was next on the list, it was dead so I plugged it in and after a minute or two watched it flicker into life. The inbox on my texts and answerphone was bursting and this time it was full with calls from Edward and interestingly the number I had for MM, it looked like he was organised enough that he had a second phone so I had different numbers for them.

I stood looking out of my apartment window, trying to fathom out if I had missed any signs, how could I have not known that Edward and MM were the same person, but then again how could I have known? I couldn't get my head around it. How long had he known? Had he known all along? How did he manage to sit across from me in the restaurant and not tell me? Why didn't he tell me then when I thought MM had stood me up?

The more I thought about it the angrier I got, what was so hard, all he had had to say was "hey Bella I think you're SG, are you because if you are I'm MM?" I'd either of said yes or asked him what the hell he was talking about. Not hard, at all.

My anger made me go back to my phone and start to look at the text messages, there were loads all from Edward and all of them saying sorry and asking for a chance to explain. As I slowly scrolled through them and deleted them I couldn't help but think about our time together. Here I was wondering why he had kept his distance from me, I had even begun to question his experience with women and all the time we had already done the dirty deed and had mind blowing sex.

Shit he must be pissing himself laughing at me, poor Bella who hadn't a clue what was going on while he got to play puppet master with me. Here I was feeling guilty because I'd been Izzy and Bella but not with him, never with him. I'd been me, just because he didn't know my name didn't mean I'd intentionally deceived him.

I felt so ashamed and I don't know why I felt that all of a sudden, because up to that moment I'd never regretted or felt any negative emotions about my time in the dark room. Now though I felt used and dirty, which was stupid because I'd done everything willingly, I suppose my deep seated morals were suddenly shouting louder than normal, pointing out that this wouldn't have happened if I'd have known who I was allowing to touch me in the dark.

A knock at the door startled me, it was the middle of the day and everyone I knew would be at work, everyone except Edward I supposed. As I let that information sink in my thoughts were torn, did I want it to be Edward or not? As whoever banged on the door again I walked towards the door and peered out through the spy hole. All I could see were flowers, lots of flowers. I turned away from the door and rested my back against it, the only person who would send me flowers had to be Edward and I certainly wasn't ready to see him. Just as I was about to move away from the door Albert the concierge shouted me to let me know it was him.

I opened the door and took the arrangement from him, it was huge and as I went to close the door he called out to me and started to pass other ones to me as well.

"Miss Swan these have been arriving every six hours for the past few days, as we haven't been able to get your attention we just left them here for you" he explained. The hallway was full of arrangements, all different sizes and colours, some in vases, some in hand ties. The smell was amazing and I wondered what my neighbours must have thought.

I took the cards from the arrangements and looked at each one, they all had the same message

 _ **I'm sorry**_

 _ **Please let me explain**_

 _ **Edward**_

I really wasn't ready for that yet so I put the flowers altogether in the far corner of the room and sat back down. I spent an hour just staring at them, they were really beautiful but they just seemed to upset me even more. The day passed quietly and I was just starting to think about having something to eat when I heard a key slide into the door lock. I realised just as the door swung open that I hadn't remembered to double lock it after the delivery so Rosalie was in before I could do anything about it.

"About fucking time Bella, I had arranged for a locksmith to meet me here if I couldn't get in this time"

As she sat down on the couch, throwing her briefcase, laptop bag and coat on the floor, she quickly sent off a flurry of text messages. My heart sank, I knew that meant she was calling for reinforcements because she had gotten into the apartment. Sure enough within twenty minutes both Bree and Alice came charging into my home, one carrying Chinese and one carrying ice cream. While I couldn't face the ice cream just yet, I was glad no one had wine because I certainly wasn't drinking ever again. I fetched plates, cutlery and water for all of us and we sat in silence as Alice opened all the boxes of take out and we started to fill our plates. It was strange because we had never struggled for conversation in all of our time together over the years and it had always been relaxed and easy. I tried to eat but I just couldn't stomach anything while the atmosphere was as strained as it was.

"OK enough, just say what you need to say and get it over with, I can't stand this silence" I shouted at no one in particular.

"Bella get over yourself, were not here to say anything to you or judge, we're here to make sure you are ok, you haven't been answering your phone or emails for the best part of three days, and we were worried about you." Bree said as she slammed her plate down on the table in front of the couch.

"Well as you can see I'm perfectly fine. I'm well used and thoroughly ashamed but other than that I'm fine." I told them as I started to clear the plates away.

"Well that is obviously a crock of shit Bella, you look like someone has just dug you up and you have shut yourself away for three days so you are most definitely not fucking fine." Rosalie said in her usual caring and diplomatic manner.

I wasn't ready to go over everything that had happened at the club yet but I knew the girls wouldn't let it rest until they had all the information.

"Ok you get one question each and I'll fill in what details I can but after that I'm not talking about this fiasco ever again" I told them as I fetched spoons for each of us so we could devour the ice cream.

"Oh no you don't get away that easily, we need to decide between ourselves what the questions should be, so we can get the most information out of you" Bree said as she took a huge spoon full.

" Right I'll go first" Rosalie was as forthright as ever.

"How long had Edward known you were the girl at the club?" As ever she was straight to the important stuff.

"I don't know" was my honest answer.

"OK me next, how long has Edward known Renee and how did he know her?" Bree asked.

"Besides the fact that is two questions, the answer to both is 'I don't know... again'"

"Bella, how do you feel about Edward?" Alice asked.

This was a question I was not expecting and it caught me off guard.

"I really don't know Alice, if you had asked me that a few days ago I would have said I was falling for him quite hard, but now I realise I don't even know who he is"

"Well that was a bit of a pointless exercise Bella, we are trying to find out what has been going on and you can say is I don't know" Rosalie said as she whipped out the dreaded iPhone again.

She sent a flurry of texts and then kicked off her shoes. "Ok I'm staying here until I get the full story so start at the beginning and don't leave anything out or it's going to be a very long few days."

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To AG thank you this chapter is so much better and to Edlovesme thank you as ever I couldn't do this without either of you.

English – American translation

Naff means a little bit rubbish

Rumbled means might have been found out .


	49. Deprivation Chapter 49

Deprivation Chapter 49

EPOV

Shit her phone is still turned off! I've been trying to contact her from both numbers since she stormed out of the bar. In fact I've actually filled up her voicemail so I know she hasn't even listened to any of the messages yet. I could go round and try and see her, but Emmett has warned me off, he told me that even Rosalie hasn't been able to get in and if I tried he would make sure I regretted it.

I'm not quite sure what his problem is because he wasn't really sure what had gone off in the bar. As ever Emmett had missed the spectacle because he was sitting in the booth with the girls holding court. Rosalie had obviously been very selective with the information she had given him, so he knew something had happened but he didn't know what. He warned me off just in case I had upset Bella. It was a blanket warning to cover all or any problems, bless him; he was really just looking out for her.

For the last two days I hadn't been much use, between sending text messages and leaving voicemails I really hadn't been able to concentrate on anything. Charlie had kicked me off the site of the new club because I was getting under everybody's feet and the new manager at my other club had stuck me in an office and given me a load of spreadsheets to look at, to keep me away from everyone. He knew I hated that, so I suppose it was his way of trying to get rid of me. I spent sometime in the spa area, having a sauna and a steam but the rooms (though not pitch black), had low soothing lighting and it just reminded me of Bella so I had to leave them and get dressed. In the end I decided to have a haircut and shave just to pass some time. Tracy our new stylist gave me an incredible Indian head massage and as she ran her hands all over my scalp I swear I saw stars. My hair was as soft as anything when she had finished and I knew I would never let anyone else near my unruly mop again.

I was still killing time though, just waiting for Bella to call. She had said that night she would speak to me later when she could bear to look at me and how long could that be? Two days, a week, a month? Shit this was depressing; what had I done? All I should have done was come clean to her as soon as I knew. As soon as her little handbag thingy rang and I knew it was her, I should have said something. Instead I was here, just lurching from one distraction to another, in fact it was so bad I very nearly called my mother and asked her to meet me for lunch. Luckily for all involved, I managed to clear my head before I did that. She would have taken one look at me, known something was wrong and spent the rest of lunch getting every detail out of me. I certainly wasn't ready for my mother knowing I was a member of DESIRE.

As I sat in my apartment staring out over the city I had called the florist and ordered flowers, at least that way I could try and get a message to her. I asked her to write I was sorry on the card and asked for a chance to explain. I knew the florist quite well as it was one my mother favoured, so when I called to ask if they had been delivered they explained that Bella hadn't answered the door and the doorman had taken them in. Now this worried me, had she not answered because she was out or was she just avoiding me? I called the florist back and asked her to deliver a different arrangement every six hours until Bella signed for one herself. At this point she has delivered six or seven and still nothing, the time has come for action, I'm just not sure what action that is.

"Hey Jasper are you able to get away I really need to talk?" I was relying on the fact that given he was in a relationship and in love with Alice, hopefully he would have an insight into how I could get Bella to speak to me.

"Well you are in luck, Alice has just been summoned somewhere so I'm all alone tonight, do you want to come here or do you want to meet at one of the bars?" he asked.

I think I surprised him when I invited him to my place, I know I didn't do that very often but he had been here before.

"Are you sure Edward? I know you are very protective of your home, I'm happy to meet in a bar if you prefer."

I assured him everything was ok and he offered to pick beer up, but I told him I had plenty in and would see him soon. I quickly dialled my local pizza place and ordered two pizzas but then changed it to three and decided it was time to clear the air with Emmett.

"Hi Em, Jasper is coming over for pizza and beer tonight I wondered if you would like to join us?"

"What at your apartment are you sure?"

What was it with these two? I know I don't do this a lot but really am I that bad?

"Yes at my place, now are you coming or not, I've ordered three large everything on them pizzas and I have that English strong beer you like" I was determined to lure him over.

"Well Rosalie has disappeared off somewhere unexpectedly so I'm at a loose end, Coach doesn't need to know I had a small slice of pizza, does he? Right I'll be there shortly if I can remember where it is" he said laughing as he broke the connection.

As I let the doorman know to expect them both, and the pizza delivery, I realised they had both mentioned the girls going off somewhere so I really hoped they were checking on Bella. Until I could get her to talk to me I was just in limbo really, waiting. I liked the idea though that the girls could be with her. The weird thing was that I really missed her, I missed seeing her, sending silly text messages and emails and I missed just spending time with her. Our dates had been great, nothing like I expected, in fact I wasn't sure what I was expecting, she was funny, sexy, articulate, sexy, lovely, educated, well read, sexy and incredible. We had talked about all sorts of subjects, she had a measured opinion on everything and she had even helped me with some ideas for my club.

As the doorman rang up I left the door on the latch for the guys, Jasper was first to arrive and as he came through the door he looked… worried.

"What's up Jaz, come on in and take a load off"

"I'm just slightly uncomfortable to be honest Edward, you never invite us here and I'm a little worried about what you are going to spring on me this time. "

"I'm not going to dump anything on you my friend, what I really want to do is to pick your brains for ideas on how I can get back on Bella's good side. She hasn't answered my calls or texts and she isn't accepting the flowers I keep sending, so I'm starting to panic, I really don't know where to start"

At this point before Jasper could answer the pizza delivery guy arrived closely followed by Emmett. I paid for the pizza and after handing Jasper his drink and getting a coke for Emmett and a beer for me, I placed the pizza on the little table in front of the couch.

"I can only eat one slice of this pizza guys, I have a heavy training session tomorrow and I can't do that if I'm full of sugar and cheese" Emmett said as he pushed a whole slice into his mouth in one go.

"Well that has to be the shortest meal on record then, do you want me to put the box in the oven so you can take it home for Rosalie?" I asked him.

"You know how to use the oven here?" Emmett asked me with a look of shock, no horror on his face.

"Of course I do, how do you think I feed myself?" What a stupid question I thought as I picked up a slice of my pizza.

"I just presumed that you ate out all the time or went to the country club with your parents" he continued. "I never thought you actually cooked, do you go grocery shopping as well?" Emmett continued.

"Emmett of course I do, what do you think I have,a butler or something like Downton Abbey" I laughed.

The colour on his cheeks drained away and I thought for a minute that he actually believed I might have one.

"No no no I never thought that , I just, well Rosalie said, look it doesn't matter, just forget it. Now why are we here?"

I took pity on him and left him alone, looking over at Jasper who was quietly chomping away on his pizza, I said the same thing again

"I need some advice from you both on how to win round Bella because she won't text me, talk to me or return my calls."

"I haven't told Rosalie anything I swear, I never told her we were in the bedroom looking in handbags and I haven't told her you're the Mystery Man. She knows I'm hiding something from her and she keeps trying to get me to tell her but I haven't I swear" Emmett blurted out

"Emmett don't worry I know you wouldn't. What I need to do now is look forward, how am I going to fix this?"

"Well the first question that needs answering is about how you feel about her, I mean are we talking about Strawberry Girl here or are we talking about Bella?" Jasper asked

"Wow just a minute I thought we had already established without a doubt that Bella is Strawberry Girl" Emmett said as he picked up another piece of pizza.

"Keep up Emmett, she is but Edward needs to decide what he wants. Does he want Bella and the dates they have been going on and a normal relationship or is he looking for Strawberry Girl and some more anonymous sex in the club?" Jasper explained.

"Guys, without a doubt it's Bella. I've been thinking about her over these past few days, to be honest I haven't really given Strawberry Girl much thought" I admitted.

"Well that's good then, what we need to do is establish a credible reason why you didn't tell her straight away and why it took a slanging match with Renee to get you to finally admit who you were" Jasper recapped.

"Putting it like that it doesn't sound very good does it, how the hell am I going to do this?" I asked out loud

"Edward did you know that Renee had dangly bits when you were at the cub, I mean did you think he or she was a woman, or did you know he was a man?" Emmet asked as he picked up his third slice.

"Emmett, why are you asking that?" I really worry sometimes about his thought processes.

"I just wondered, I mean did she really look stunning and womanly and were you convinced she was a woman? I don't really understand if Garrett says he has always been gay why he wants to be with Renee, I mean he might as well be with a woman"

Logically I could see Emmett's argument, especially when I thought back to my first meeting with Renee. Truth is I did think she was stunning but I thought she was a well preserved older lady, I suppose now looking at it I should have realised something was a little off!

"Emmett concentrate please! We are supposed to be trying to sort out my problem here, it could be ages before we all get together again."

At that second both of their mobile phones alerted them to a message.

"Well that's interesting, apparently Bella has broken her self-imposed seclusion and Alice and Rosalie are staying there with her tonight. That means we have the next few hours to come up with something that will work " Jasper relayed as he kicked off his shoes and settled back in the recliner.

"Get your thinking caps on guys we have one night to get everything in order, but for starters Edward I think a beer is in order". Emmett sat back, training was tomorrow, he'd worry about that in the morning, for now his friend needed him and his extensive knowledge of the female species.

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Thank you to AG and Edlovesme for all their patience and help.

Also thank you so much to all the new reviewers I loved reading your comments


	50. Deprivation Chapter 50

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 50

BPOV

Well it has been two weeks since the big bar reveal and I still feel angry and annoyed. Angry I could live with, Edward had been stupid not telling me as soon as he knew who I was, but as my anger had started to subside as I tried several times to put myself in his position. What would I have done if it had been the other way round? I was really curious as to how he had figured it out and I had very nearly called him to just to ask him about that. I hadn't though because I just couldn't bring myself to actually speak to him. I'm just so pissed at myself and him, the more I think about it I know this is stupid ,it's not as though I have done anything to be ashamed of.

Yes I had a couple of kinky encounters in a darkened room but that was with another consenting adult, but I should have been able to just dust myself off, realise I may have been played a little and just carried on with my life. What I can't believe is that I allowed this to knock me off my feet like it has. I suppose really most of the anger and annoyance is actually directed inwards at myself, I can't remember the last time I had to use sick days at work, never mind a duvet day. To actually shut down and mope just isn't me. Well I don't think it is, Rose seems to disagree but I was convinced I'd matured and hardened myself over the last few years.

I need to make a decision now, I had told Edward I would speak to him when I was ready, so I suppose it is time to call him, I just don't know what to say. I want answers but after that I'm not sure what I want. Two weeks ago I was falling for Edward, hard, and now well I don't know how I am ever going to trust him again and if I want to. Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

EPOV

I am desperate because I was convinced by now she would have called or at least sent me a text. However, nothing, it's been two weeks and she still refuses to speak to me. I've tried calling, texting and emailing but all go unanswered. I stopped for a few days to see if that would help, but all that made me do was panic even more because I really don't want her to think I have given up on her. I cancelled the flower deliveries after she had her twelfth delivery and started sending other gifts instead. I've sent baskets of muffins, a fruit basket, and chocolates, champagne and her favourite Strawberry body lotion and shampoo (Rose gave me the details). I just want to make sure I am in the forefront of her mind all the time because she has to forgive me at some point and start talking to me again so I can explain.

The guys and I couldn't come up with a concrete plan on how to make this all alright because I had no idea how long it would take to get her to speak to me, but assuming she does then I have the outline of a plan. It was something that Emmett actually thought up and after the three of us got our heads together we did manage to come up with something that should blow her socks off, actually I just want her to forgive me so I hope that she'll see the thought I've put into her surprise. Once I have a timeframe I can start to put things into action.

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BPOV

OK, I can't put this off any longer, my curiosity is killing me because I really need to know how he figured it out, and so I am going to call him tonight. I finally made the decision as I sat at my desk with a pile of manuscripts sitting there looking at me. I couldn't concentrate on anything properly because no matter what I was thinking about, my mind was always going over every conversation I had had with him. It was time to put my life back in some kind of order, I needed to sort everything out and get some answers so I could and start to move on.

As ever as soon as I made a big decision my phone rang and it was Rosalie, her timing impeccable as ever.

"I thought you were in court this morning?"

"Well hello to you too. I was supposed to be but I got a deal sorted before we got there so everything was over pretty quick, so I was wondering do you fancy a girlie night tonight? I am in dire need of some oestrogen because Emmett is just driving me mad at the moment." She explained

"What has he done this time?"

"Oh he hasn't really done anything, I'm still punishing him because I know he knew about Edward being your MM, he hasn't cracked yet, but it has been fun torturing him".

"Oh Rosalie you shouldn't be doing that, if and it is a big if, he did know, it was because he was covering for his friend, I would do that for you".

"I know you would sweetie, and honestly I'm really proud of him for not cracking but I need a break so can I come over or do you fancy going out somewhere?"

"You can come over but I was planning on calling Edward tonight to talk to him, I need to know how he knew it was me" I was a little uneasy revealing that to her, I wasn't sure how she would take it.

"Thank fuck for that, it's about time! Talk to him, let him explain, then we can have some fun torturing him instead." she said and I could tell she was rubbing her hands together in anticipation.

"Rosalie you really are evil at times, you shouldn't enjoy this as much as you seem to."

"No Bella I'm not evil, I just like to make sure that the payback is equal to the original 'crime' hence my career choice."

As the call ended I was laughing for the first time in ages, she always seemed to give me an immediate lift and in the spirit of that I decided to call Edward straight away. So I got myself a coffee, closed my office door and picked up my cell phone. It struck me then that the first decision was which number to call him on, did I ring the number I had for MM or did I call Edward?

Settling on Edward it took just three rings for him to answer

"Bella is that you? Are you ok? Thank fuck you're finally ringing me, can we talk? I'm so sorry for everything, please give me a chance to explain, Bella please" he never even drew breath and before I could answer any of his questions or enquiries I had to laugh. That in its own way broke the ice so to speak and I relaxed instantly.

"Edward I need to talk to you and I don't really want to do it over the phone so I was wondering if you could meet me for either dinner tonight or even lunch tomorrow. As you can imagine I have a lot of questions that I need answering"

"Bella whatever or whenever you want, in fact I'm free now, how about we go for a late lunch if you can get away?" he was obviously eager, very eager.

"Why not, I haven't had a break today, or this week if it comes to it so I could get away, how about we meet In Millennium Park, I like the restaurant there" I told him

"Ok see you in half an hour, and Bella thank you for giving me a chance, I'll make things right I promise ."

I sat at my desk looking at my cell phone for a good ten minutes.

Just hearing his voice had made my lady parts smile, it was going to be harder than I originally thought resisting him, but I would, I knew I had to, to distract my wondering thoughts all I had to visualise was Renee sprawled on the floor of the bar and the look on Edward's face as he called me Strawberry Girl.

If he thought everything was going to get back on track with one meal he was in for a big big shock. I really just wanted answers and once I had those we could both go back to our lives, he could go back to the club and me, well I'll live to fight another day, I'll just be very careful with the next man that gets anywhere near my bedroom, never mind my bed or my lady parts !

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EPOV

Yes, yes,yes,yes,yes! I can't believe it, finally the call I've been waiting for, I can do this, I can make her understand that I wanted her to know me Edward, not MM and whilst I didn't do it with any bad intentions, it was stupid to keep it from her.

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BPOV

After a quick wash and re do of my work make up, I made my way to Millennium Park, the restaurant there was one of my favourite places to go and just be alone when I wanted time to reflect on things. I could be found sitting outside with a Chicken Caesar salad watching the world go by when I needed an hour or so of peace and quiet, although because of the tourists you needed to pick your time. I got there quite quickly and luckily my favourite table was available so I ordered a bottle of white wine and waited. The wine was cold and crisp and as I swallowed the first mouthful I realised it was the first alcoholic drink I'd had since my indulgent vodka binge. I caught the waiter's attention and asked for a jug of ice water as well. I needed to keep a clear head because getting plastered now would just lead to a fight or sex or even both and at this moment I really didn't want that. Well maybe just the sex, no no Bella no.

I saw him before he saw me. He was pacing in a circle, his hands in his hair and it looked as though he was talking to himself and I couldn't help but smile, he was nervous, at least that it was it looked like. I watched as he stopped dead, took a big breath and tried to smooth down his hair, he seemed to give himself a pep talk and then turned towards the restaurant. I hid the smile on my face as he walked towards the entrance, seconds later spotting me and waving with the most glorious smile on his face. I could quite easily get lost in that smile so I had to break his gaze and take a mouthful of wine.

"Hi Bella, thank you so much for agreeing to meet me, I need to talk to you, to explain" he said before he had even taken his seat.

"Look Edward just sit down and let's order. I want to do this with as little stress as possible. I have some questions I need answering and then after that we'll see. Whilst ever Rose & Alice are with Emmett and Jasper we are going to be in each other's lives, so we need to see if we can remain friends ."

The smile on his face disappeared momentarily at the mention of remaining friends, but I didn't want to give him false hope, trust was important to me and well it was shattered at the moment.

We ordered and for the first time conversation between us was strained and when he started to talk about the weather I knew then I needed to take charge, I hadn't arranged to meet him to discuss the climate.

"Edward I need to know, how did you discover I was Strawberry Girl?"

"Before we get into all this Bella, I need you to know that I didn't do this, I mean keep it from you, for any reason other than I wanted to get to know you, Bella, and for you to know me as Edward. I didn't want us to think about Mystery Man and Strawberry Girl at all that was my only reason, stupid as that seems now." He looked quite distraught and if he wasn't being honest with me he was an excellent actor.

"Edward I can understand that, I probably would have wanted the same thing, that is to get to know you as Edward but what I don't understand is the deception, why didn't you just tell me and when did you find out?"

"Well I realised the night of Alice and Jasper's engagement party. The guys and I were in one of their guest bedrooms trying to decide whether to call Strawberry Girl and invite her to the party. We'd been texting that night and I couldn't wait to meet her or you. I sent a text to her phone and your purse was in the bedroom and obviously the text alert went off. We thought it was a coincidence so to test it I sent a couple more texts and the called the phone. By that time we knew who ever owned the phone was SG so we had a look in the bag. Your ID was in there."

"So you have known a while then. Just a minute, that means you knew when we had dinner that first time, when MM was delayed because of car trouble"

"Guilty I'm afraid, like I said earlier all I could think about was getting to know you and more importantly, letting you see the real me". He explained

"That is the problem Edward, I'm even more confused now than ever. How could you let me just think that we were growing closer, building trust and a relationship when all the time you knew you were playing two different roles?" I was desperately trying to stay calm and keep myself together. I didn't want to lose it and start shouting because I wanted us to try and stay friends.

"But I wasn't really was I? Think about it after that initial night how many texts did you get from MM? I hardly sent any and they were usually just to see if you were ….." he trailed off without finishing the sentence.

"To see if I was what?" I was trying to remember the last few messages I'd received.

"Oh shit! You were testing me weren't you? All the messages were to try and get me back to the club or out on a date, you were seeing if I was going to see MM again, weren't you?" I asked him, the tone of my voice made it quite apparent I was pissed off with him.

"In a way yes I suppose I was, you never mentioned the club or that you were a member of it, or that you were seeing anyone else, so I needed to be sure you weren't still interested in meeting up with him, erm I mean me, as MM. Shit this is confusing." He said as his hands went back into his hair. He pulled tightly on the strands and almost instantly my lady bits reacted again, I realised I still wanted to do that, I wanted to pull on his hair really badly, as I rode him to an amazing orgasm which I knew he could give me.

I shook my head to get rid of the image stuck in my mind, I couldn't think like that, this wasn't about what I knew he could do to my body, it was about trust and respect, yeah right. I could almost hear Rosalie in my head snorting and telling me to just get over it and fuck him because that would make me feel better.

"Edward it was hardly first date, second date or any date conversation was it? Oh by the way I spend my Saturday nights at a sex club, letting strangers feel me up and fuck me, would you like to join or should we just go the movies instead?" I couldn't help but laugh, the conversation was getting ridiculous and we were just going around in circles.

We sat in silence for a while, neither of us knowing what to say, I finished my wine and the glass of water and sat back as the waiter cleared our lunch plates.

"Could I interest either of you in desert or coffee?" the waiter asked.

"I'm fine thank you but Bella would you like something else?" Edward asked.

"No I'm fine thank you can we just have the bill please" I needed to get away, we hadn't resolved anything, I just knew now why he hadn't told me and when he'd found out who I was which was my original aim for the meeting.

"Can we please go for a walk around the park Bella because I really don't want us to leave it like this?" Edward asked as he paid the bill which he'd swiped from the table as soon as the waiter put it down.

"Is there really any point Edward? I mean now I know why you did what you did does it even make any difference? I don't know that it does because you didn't trust me enough to tell me before so why has that changed now?"

With that I got up and walked away from him, leaving him still sitting at the table with a resigned look on his gorgeous face. I wasn't sure we could be just friends but for the sake of Rose and Alice I had to try but I wasn't going to pretend it was going to be easy.

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Before you all have a go at me Bella needs to do a little soul searching and realise that everything Edward did was with the best intentions, however stupid….

As ever thank you to AG and Edlovesme for reading and making sure that everything I actually write makes sense.

And also thank you so much for all the new reviews, I love reading your thoughts and if I've missed replying to any I'm so sorry I do try to answer everyone.


	51. Deprivation Chapter 51

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 51

A quick hello and thank you to all the new readers, so glad you found us.

EPOV

Shit! Shit! Shit! That didn't go at all well, because I had to sit there at the restaurant table and watch her walk away from me yet again. I can't believe that went so badly, I honestly thought that once she realised I meant no harm by not telling her straight away that she would understand and give me another chance. I'm such a fuck up, the first time that anybody actually means anything to me and I make such a mess of it. How the fuck am I going to make this right now? The only thing I can think of is calling in reinforcements, I need someone who knows Bella really well and is willing to help me. My first thought is Alice but the I realise she has only known Bella a relatively short time so I really need to speak to Rosalie, shit this should be fun…..

"Hi Rosalie its Edward, do you have a minute to talk? I really need some advice" I knew this was going to be painful but I couldn't think of any other way to get some inside knowledge.

"Oh Edward, Edward what have you done this time?" she asked. I quickly filled her in on our lunch date and what we had talked about.

"Rosalie all I need is for Bella to realise just how much I want her, I tried to explain to her at lunch why I didn't tell her sooner but she … " Rosalie cut me off before I could finish the sentence.

"Want Edward? That is a strange way to describe how you feel because that sounds like Mystery Man talking not you"

"What are you talking about Rosalie? I am Mystery Man, you know that"

"I know you are Edward but Bella doesn't want Mystery Man, she wants you, and if you can't tell the difference between the two how can you expect Bella to? I suggest you give some thought to what Edward wants from Bella, because at the moment Bella has no idea."

All this talking in riddles is confusing me, did I want different things? Was I behaving as two separate people, as Rosalie suggested? As Mystery Man I wanted to meet Bella in the club bar and if she had shown up none of this would have happened, we could have talked knowing who we were and that we were both members of the club and taken it from there.

" This is all that fucking Garrets fault, well him and that crazy woman ." I was on a roll now and I could hear Rosalie tutting while I was ranting.

"Typical fucking man, it's always somebody else's fault not yours. Man up Edward and admit you fucked up. Not only did you mess with Bella's feelings, you lied to her continually and now she doesn't know what's true and what isn't." As ever Rosalie was straight to the point, I hadn't thought about it like that, and this is why I needed her help.

"I never lied to her Rosalie, all I did was not tell I who I was"

"You may not have lied to her Edward but remember she has had sex with Mystery Man. She thought she was building a relationship with you, something deeper and more meaningful than a quick fuck in a dark room, no matter how spectacular it was"

"She said it was spectacular did she?" the grin on my face made my cheeks hurt, she was right, it was out of this world.

"You boys are all so fucking unbelievable! All that and all you get is the spectacular reference. Edward if you really want Bella you need to show her. She needs to know that YOU, EDWARD care about her, that you want to get to know her both in and out of the bedroom and build a relationship with her so put on your thinking cap and together we will see what we can come up with, ok?"

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BPOV

Well walking away like that was one of the hardest things I've done but I'm proud of myself for doing it. I really wanted to get everything sorted out between us but how can we when he doesn't trust me and he doesn't even seem to know what he wants himself? I think my best plan now is to just get on with my life and when I have to be around him to be polite and friendly, luckily my feelings for him are still very new so I should be able to keep them under control, I hope.

As I made my way back to work Rosalie called

"Hi honey, I hear lunch didn't go very well, where are you now?" she asked as I looked round to see if someone had been following me, reporting on every move I was making.

"How do you know where and with whom I had lunch today? I haven't even had time to call you"

"Oh I have my ways, but in the realms of honesty I will admit that Edward has just called me in bits. He has asked for my help in making you see how much he cares about you and just how much he wants to be with you,"

"He has a funny way of showing it Rose. Not only did he forget to tell me he was Mystery Man, every text that I received from Mystery Man after that was a way of him testing me, trying to see if I would arrange to meet MM again. I mean, fuck, how little did he actually trust me?"

"Oh I don't know Bella, I think it was quite clever in its own way. I will admit that it is definitely underhand but it is something I could see myself doing. Admit it, if you had a way to check out your new dates honesty and integrity could you say you wouldn't have tried it? I know you're hurting at the moment, but is it just your pride that's a bit wounded or even worse are you feeling slightly disgusted with yourself so your punishing the both of you?"

I was too speechless to answer, Rosalie was as ever direct and to the point.

"Come on Bella, I know you. What has you so wound up? Ok, he didn't tell you he was your Mystery Man but did he try anything else on? Did he treat you badly or ever suggest anything you weren't happy to be part of? If I recall correctly he has been the perfect gentleman, you even complained to me about the lack of physical interaction between your two and the fact that you felt he was holding back. Maybe that was his way of getting to know you Bella, and letting you see the real Edward before he came clean."

"I don't know Rose I would have said I was confused, but I'm not, I'm angry, I'm just not sure anymore why." I was at a loss to explain to her what the problem was.

"I think you should give this some serious thought Bella. Edward is a nice guy, when you get past his less than stellar previous exploits and I really think you could be good together once this is all sorted out. He makes you happy, or he did, you can't deny that."

"I know Rose, and I'm sure that's part of the problem. I was falling for him hard, and by him I mean Edward but now I'm not sure that I actually met the real Edward"

"Oh Bella, think about it. Your persona at work is nothing like the real you because you could never be that much of a bitch round the clock. Then there is the side of Bella I never knew existed, the one who went into the Sensory Room at a sex club not once but three times and had sex with a complete stranger. Would I have ever imagined you doing that? Never , I really didn't think you had in it in you. So tell me, who is the real Bella?"

I was too shocked to even answer her, so I just continued walking back towards the office.

"Hmmmm seems I've given you something to think about my little friend. Well once you have mulled it all over and need to talk call me ok Bella" Rosalie said before cutting off the call.

As I walked back along the sidewalk my mind was going crazy, there were so many contradictory thoughts banging into each other that I was worried they might bring on a headache. As I passed one of my favourite cafés I stopped, deciding that I needed some "me" time. I quickly ordered a decadent hot chocolate with a shot of coffee liqueur and extra cream plus a chocolate cupcake with a huge swirl of frosting on top. I was probably looking at about a thousand calories but what the hell? I needed the comfort. I sat down and took out my tablet so I could catch up on reading the latest updates on my favourite Fanfiction stories when two of the admin staff from my office walked in. Luckily they hadn't seen me so I was able to manoeuvre myself around so my back was towards them and the counter and remain incognito.

"Thank fuck she's out this afternoon because it makes nipping out so much easier " Lauren said to Jessica standing next to her. Jessica was my part time assistant because I didn't need her full time so she was split between me and the admin pool, so this should be interesting.

"You don't have to work with her Lauren. She can be a complete bitch some of the time, I was beginning to think she was getting laid regularly or something because before these last couple of weeks she had calmed down a bit and was more pleasant to work for. Who would want to be around her when she is having a bitch strop though?" Jessica replied.

They were talking about me that much was obvious. I was hard at work I knew that, but that was because it warranted it most of the time, but it wasn't me, not the real me. I sat and finished drinking my hot chocolate, it was absolutely amazing, warming me inside and out, the splash of alcohol just giving it that little extra. I had a lot to think about, Rose had made me look at things differently.

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EPOV

Surprisingly Rosalie had been not only helpful but understanding as well. I was expecting a complete mouthful of abuse, but no she was actually full of good ideas. She was completely on our side and appeared to just want to see Bella and I together. When I asked her why, she just told me that she hadn't seen Bella as happy as she'd been during the weeks we were dating. This didn't help how I was feeling about myself but it gave me hope we could sort something out.

Rosalie had actually come up with a really good idea of how I could show Bella I cared about her, so I had some planning to do. I needed to speak to Charlie and see how the club was coming on so then I could make some plans.

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So things are a changing, Bella and Edward are both starting to see things from a different perspective, things can only get better, can't they ?


	52. Deprivation Chapter 52

Deprivation Chapter 52

EPOV

It's been two weeks since we had lunch in the park and I still haven't heard from her. I suppose I should be panicking but I'm in constant contact with Rosalie and she is keeping me calm. Together we are planning my next attempt at talking to Bella but at the same time Rosalie assures me she is chipping away at the walls Bella seems to have put up against me.

To stop myself from moping I have kept busy. Charlie is happy that the club is nearly ready, and I haven't been caught out this time with how quickly it turns from a building site into something that resembles an exclusive club. All the PR literature has gone out on all forms of social media as well as the more, should we say traditional routes. My country club connections have been worked extensively, with friends and business associates of my father as well as all my existing members being invited to a spectacular open evening in a month's time. We have also canvassed all the businesses outside the radius of my other club with an invite to the open evening. Take up has been steady so far, as I expected because after all it is going to be an exclusive club. We had also targeted people like the Institute of Directors, CEO organisations and large charity organisations, anyone who had male, highly paid executives on their books.

As we compiled the guest list and looked at the PR lists it was apparent that Bella's idea about a club exclusively for ladies wasn't half bad. Whilst there weren't as many female CEO's, there were still quite a few, as well as countless VP's and CFO's. Maybe, just maybe, my next place could have two sides, Male and Female but separate inside so as to retain the feel of the clubs signature. It also had to be a larger building because I would be looking at housing two clubs at once, so if this one was as successful as I was sure it was going to be, maybe my next venture would be a dual club, thanks to Bella.

I spent the day talking to caterers about canapés for the party, interviewing for a chef so I could have the restaurant open as soon as possible and this time I needed an event organiser because I'd made sure that part of the club could be used for meetings and dinners in mixed company. If that side went well there was no reason we couldn't branch out into event planning for weddings, conferences, celebrations in fact the whole works. I was excited, for the first time in weeks Bella wasn't the first thing on my mind when I woke up. Don't get me wrong she was definitely the second thing I thought about and she was definitely on my mind when I was relieving the stress in my morning shower. Now that I could see her in my mind I was able to transplant her face onto the imaginary form kneeling in front of me. Before I was always wondering what Strawberry Girl looked like, I think though it almost made it harder to deal with, now I knew exactly what I was missing. I was at her mercy at the moment, waiting for Rosalie to tell me the time was right to try again.

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BPOV

They always say that overhearing whispered conversations or listening at doors usually means you hear things you don't want to, they would be right. Listening to Lauren and Jessica in the café had really struck a cord with me and while I was sure they were talking about me I knew I needed to be sure. The next day I went in to work early armed with a huge box of cupcakes. I made sure there was one on everybody's desk and then I retreated to my office closing the door. Nobody even came in and mentioned the cakes, but as I walked round the office later I could see they had all been eaten. When I mentioned it to Jessica later she had no idea who had left the cakes and the general opinion in the office was some new deli must have left free samples.

I think what hurt the most was that my close friends would have known instantly it was something I'd do, but my colleagues at work well they had a totally different perception of who I was. Maybe we all did have multi personas, or maybe I just was very selective who I actually let see the real me.

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EPOV a week later

Ok we are good to go, Charlie has finished the project well ahead of time and the club is ready for the interior designers to finish off all the' frothy bits'. You know things like the pictures needed hanging, the robes and slippers need stacking and the toiletries dispensers in the showers need filling.

This morning I have done a complete run through with Charlie and Carlisle and we tested everything, the pool is full, the Jacuzzis and hot tubs are up and running and the steam rooms and saunas are slowly getting to temperature. The place looks amazing I can't believe how 'improved' this version is against the old club. The furnishings are luxurious, the technology cutting edge and the gym state of the art. We have also carried over the salon, Tracy is managing this one and the tailoring services and the restaurant are going to be amazing. I have employed a chef from England and now we have his papers sorted he is setting about arranging his kitchen. All I need now were some more waiting on staff and a few staff for the gym and pool area, I could get them over the next few weeks so I wasn't too concerned. What was exciting was that now I had a club that I could show Bella, My plan was to invite her to an open evening, what she wouldn't know until she was here was that she would be the only guest. I could show her round, feed her an amazing dinner and hopefully talk to her and get her to forgive me.

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BPOV

I thought by now I would be starting to feel 'normal' again. I'm pretty much back into my normal routine, I go to work, I meet the girls for drinks occasionally, I shop with Alice, meet Bree and Rosalie in our little tea shop and just carry on as I always have. I have purposely stayed away from all of Jasper's bars and clubs because I just can't do it. I can't risk bumping into Edward. All these good intentions about being friends and coping with being around him because of the others are a complete crock of shit. I think about him constantly. My anger has fizzled out and if I could go back to that night what I should have done was dragged him out of the bar with me, when Renee did her thing, and got him to explain everything there and then instead of running off and hiding in my apartment. I may still have walked away ultimately, but had I stayed rational I think there is a good chance we could well have worked it out.

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RPOV

"Bella we are all going out tonight, it's time you showed your face because people are asking questions why you aren't out partying with us anymore".

I was getting so tired of her moping about and Bella only had herself to blame that it had gone on this long. She should have given Edward a few days to stew then wiped the floor with him, explaining in no uncertain terms what a complete and utter prick he'd been. Then she should have taken him to bed for two days, fucked him senseless and left him in no doubt what he would be missing had he thought about screwing up again. That's what I would have done.

"Rosie I really don't want to go clubbing, I'm happy to go for a quick drink in a bar somewhere, but that is it."

"I'm sorry Bella, did you get middle aged and I missed it? Come on you have plenty of time to sit sipping tea when you are too old to pull on skin tight clothes and ridiculously high heels, so shake it up, get ready because the girls will be there to collect you at 8.00pm"

I cut off the call before she could make any more excuses, it was time for the second part of the intervention that I had been waiting for. I knew when we finally got into her apartment that that was only stage one. She has gone back to her normal routine now we just have to get her living her life again instead of just drifting through it.

I'd tried to get her to talk about Edward but it was as if she had just erased him from her mind. Almost as if he was back to being the figure on the edge of the group she said hi to occasionally but didn't really know, either that or she was still totally hung up on him and was just refusing to accept it. Personally I think it's the second option so tonight was about getting to bottom of that. Alice, Bree and I had a plan, we were going to take her out, fill her with alcohol and then we were going to sort out a guy to proposition her. Bree and I knew her well enough that her reactions would tell us everything she wasn't. All I had to do now was to get her to a club or bar.

To play fair we took her somewhere we hadn't been in ages. We had all become quite used to the fact that Jasper owned bars and clubs and in reality it made us really lazy with our decisions where we went out because it meant we never had to queue anywhere anymore and we always had a booth ready for us.

The bars and clubs we used to frequent before we met Alice and Jasper were our destination tonight which meant Bella could relax and not worry about bumping into Edward. What she didn't know was that I had already warned him where we would be and asked him to stay away. She needed tonight to recharge her batteries, flirt, get drunk, maybe kissed and get her thoughts straight.

We pulled up at Demetri's bar, a favourite place of ours that we hadn't been to in months,

"Finally the beautiful people are back, and you have another member, my my it is my lucky night" the guy on the door said as we approached.

"Good evening Felix, have you missed us?" I joked with him, he was a bit grabby at times but nothing we couldn't handle.

"Of course I've missed you my sexy Rose, now who is this beautiful little thing you have with you?"

"Felix this is Alice, she is engaged and off limits so don't even think about it" I warned him. He took absolutely no notice and looked directly at her.

"Well good evening beautiful, I look forward to getting to know you better. If you fancy some company later please come and find me, I can do things with my tongue that will make your hair curl and that engagement ring feel like a ball and chain" with that he picked up her hand and after turning it over licked her wrist and started to kiss up her arm .

I slapped him just a little too hard to be considered playful and snatched Alice's hand away.

"Felix… No, now come on let us in"

The four of us walked into the bar and it was great to be back, we knew a lot of the people here and most of them like us, had found other places to drink and party for a while, but eventually they always came back. We made our way over to the bar and ordered a large pitcher of Cosmopolitan. I know a very girlie drink but it was light, deadly and had cranberry juice in it so it counted as one of my fruit portions for the day aswel as being medicinal. A girl has to look after all her important areas after all !

"Rose can I just get a light beer?" Bella asked.

"No you can't, we are going to have a good night tonight, you can relax and wind down, we came here so you would feel comfortable and not have to worry about bumping in to anyone you didn't want to" I looked at her and from my expression I knew she knew what I was saying, no Edward tonight that's a definite.

"OK but I'm not getting drunk. I'll have a couple of drinks and a dance but I want to go home at a reasonable time, ok"

"Yes sure Bella, no problem" I said as I turned away just in time to see the Bartender adding the double shots into the pitcher.

Three hours and three pitchers later and everything was different. Bella was… the old Bella again, she had loosened up considerably with the help of several strong cocktails, a lot of dancing and just being able to let her hair down with people she trusted and cared about. It had taken a while to finally get her on to the dance floor but once she was it was like we were just out of college again. We laughed and joked and danced and drank and with each dance and each sip another layer of armour she had in place was stripped away. I knew I couldn't risk mentioning Edward, she wasn't ready for that, but she was ready to realise that she missed him and it was ok to forgive him.

The next part of the plan got a bit hazy because we were all so drunk, I really should have watched my own drinking but after the third pitcher I was having such a good time I never really thought about it. What I had planned was that Bella would naturally attract some guy who would flirt with her and she would think about Edward and then realise just how much she missed him. When she admitted it to us, we could give her the permission she was waiting for to go back and try again with him.

Unfortunately it didn't quite work like that. I came back from the bathroom to find Bree wrapped around some guy I'd never seen before and Alice standing on the table looking around the bar.

"What the fuck are you doing up there Alice? You'll get us thrown out" I shouted before looking around. "Who the fuck is that Bree is with and where is Bella?" I'd only been gone ten minutes tops, what the hell had happened?

"We have a problem, Bella was mumbling something about sex in alleyways, and what was exciting about it anyway, I thought she was going to the bathroom but I have a funny feeling she may have tried to go outside" Alice said.

"Why are we still here then? Come on we have to find her" I screamed as I tried to help Alice off the table, I don't know what was funnier, Alice trying to climb down or me trying to help her but we both ended up in fits of laughter. In the end she jumped down and we made our way across the dance floor towards the exit. We checked the fire escapes before finally going to the entrance door, unusually Felix wasn't there, not a good sign so we quickly went around the side of the building.

The sight that met us was unexpected but hilarious. Felix was on his knees clutching his balls and trying to breathe, Bella was standing over him not quite knowing what was going on. I rushed up to her ready to spring into action.

"Bella sweetie, are you ok? Did he hurt you?" I grabbed her in my arms and pulled her close hoping my plan hadn't caused a whole new heap of crap.

"I'm fine Rose, I think Felix got the wrong end of the stick, or my knee by the looks of it. I asked him if people had sex in the alley round the back of the club, he offered to show me where they did it and I followed him. When we got back here well he made a move and he didn't want to listen when I said no."

"Why did you want to know about sex in alleyways? " I asked her confused.

"It was just something Emmett mentioned. I wondered what the attraction was, you know why I wasn't enough for him?".

With that everything clicked into place, she was thinking about Edward and not only was she worried about what had gone on with MM she obviously knew about Edward's sexual history, or had heard something from my man.

"Bella whatever has happened in the past stays there, you can't change it, but it doesn't mean the present and the future can't be different. People change all the time, they meet new people who make them see things differently. You only have to look at me to see that. Have I cheated on Em? Have I gone out and had a one night stand? No, I don't need to because I have found everything I was looking for in a guy. He is it for me"

The realisation of what I had just told her was a revelation to me never mind Bella, Emmett was it for me and it was about time I told him. We hadn't done the big 'love you ' scene yet, I think he was mainly waiting for me to catch up, but I was there now and we just had to get Bella to realise she was also there.

"Oh Rosalie I'm so happy for you, I knew you loved him I just wasn't sure you knew yet" Bella said as she stepped over Felix to hug me. Alice was standing off to one side with a huge smile on her face which was good seeing as she had just heard me confess to loving her big brother!

"Yes well I know you were falling hard for Edward, so what are you going to do about that? Are you going to give him another chance? Think about it because he made you so happy Bella, and I love to see you happy"

"Bella before you answer that, please think about the situation we are in here, you are in an alleyway and could have had revenge sex but you didn't, why?" Alice asked as she moved towards us.

"Revenge sex, what the fuck, she lead me to believe we were coming out here to fuck" Felix said as he finally got to his feet,

"No I didn't I just asked you if people did" Bella snapped at him.

"Ok people before this gets out of hand let's go back inside, get warm and sort a few things out" I said as I started to lead Bella and Alice away from Felix.

"Rose, please, I just want to go home " Bella said so I nodded and we went back in to the club to collect our things and Bree.

"Hey where did you all go?" Bree asked as we got back to the table.

"Long Story, we are going, are you staying?" I asked as she was still wrapped around the guy from earlier.

"I think I'm staying" she said as she looked at the guy and smiled.

"OK you know the drill, text us and let us know you're ok" I reminded her before looking at the guy.

"Treat her well or you'll have to deal with all of us" he looked harmless but you just never know.

We jumped in a cab and dropped Alice of first and as we started the drive to Bella's place I couldn't hold back any longer.

"Bella please call Edward and sort all this out will you? I know you really miss him, what he did was it really something that was totally unforgiveable?"

She looked at me and smiled " No I suppose it wasn't. OK, Rose I'll call him and see if he wants to meet up and talk" she said.

Yeah! My work here was done, I could go home to my man and tell him just how I felt about him and I intended to do just that.

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Yeah finally everything is in place to move forward, here's hoping for no more obstacles.

AG and Edlovesme thank you x

To my Guest reviewers thank you for your comments and to the male perspective, thank you also you have given me something to think about !


	53. Deprivation Chapter 53

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 53

BPOV

I thought it was too late to call Edward when I got home from the bar so I took a long leisurely soak in the bath and then curled up in bed in some comfy pyjamas. For the first time in weeks I felt calm and relaxed and my sleep reflected that, I slept solidly until 9.00am the following morning. As I woke I felt like a great weight had been lifted off my chest and I smiled, anyone watching me would have thought I was mad but I was me again, the Bella I was before all this crap with Garrett , Renee and Edward, but now a bonus, I know I'm not broken in the orgasm department. I debated having a serious lie in but I could see it was a nice day so I decided a run would be a great start.

My exercise regime had been sketchy at best over the past month so I was already looking forward to stretching my muscles and my lungs. My run was exhilarating and I felt alive as I ran round my usual well-trodden route. Luckily I had missed all the early morning serious runners so I was able to actually run at a pace I wanted to, without having to try and keep up or get out of the way. I was really enjoying myself, my muscles were warm and stretched and I felt so alive. I was singing along to my iPod minding my own business when some asshole decided I was in his way and just as I rounded the final corner in the park when I was in full flow the last thing I expected was to be knocked side wards.

I stumbled and tried desperately to stay upright but felt myself falling forwards, unfortunately there was nothing to stop me and I went tumbling to the floor. The runner who had knocked me over just shouted something over his shoulder about me being in the way and continued on, I on the other hand sat there holding my ankle, I could feel it was in a bad way. Luckily there was a bench on the side of the pathway so I was able to crawl over to it, I pulled myself up gingerly and sat down, as soon as I got my breath I tried to stand but my ankle was not having it. Now I had a problem, I had no way of getting home and my ankle was swelling before my eyes. Thank god I always ran with my phone. I did what I always did when I needed help ….I called Rose

"At least you waited until after 10.00am to call, I'm awake so what are we doing today?" she said as she answered the phone, why couldn't she just say hello or hi like normal people?

" I have a problem Rose. I'm in the park and some idiot knocked me over and I think I've sprained my ankle really badly, can you please come and get me I need to go to the ER to get it checked out" I asked her.

"Shit! I'm on my way Bella, where are you exactly?"

"I'm in the park near the exit, I was almost finished running" I told her.

"Ok sit tight and I will get to you as soon as I can ok".

I sat on the bench and raised my ankle so it was off the floor, I'd done this enough times to know I need to elevate it but I could feel the swelling and I really wanted to take my trainer off but I was sure I wasn't supposed to. I slowly sipped my water and played on my phone as I waited for her to arrive. It seemed to be ages but actually it was only 30 minutes later that she came running towards me, closely followed by Edward and Emmett.

"What the fuck Rose?" I said looking over her shoulder at the two guys behind her.

"What? Emmett was with me and we needed someone with a car who was close by, you need to go to the ER right?" she said with a smirk on her face and a shrug of her shoulders.

"Have you not heard of cabs?" I whisper shouted.

Well this is just great, I finally see Edward for the first time in weeks and I probably smell like a sweaty sock, my hair is everywhere and I have an ankle the size of a small melon.

"Bella, Look we'll worry about everything later, let's just get you to the hospital first" Edward said as he picked me up in his arms bridal style and started to carry me to his car. I had to pinch myself to see if I was awake or dreaming this, here I was in his arms a place I'd been thinking about for weeks.

As we approached his car I could see It wasn't the Aston thank goodness, I'd never forgive myself if I got the leather upholstery all sweaty, well perhaps I would like to get it very sweaty but under entirely different circumstances. My mind was all over the place and I had to hide my face in his chest, I was sure Edward would be able to see my thoughts as my tell-tale blush made itself known. I couldn't help but take a huge breath in, I was surrounded by his scent and it reminded me of the Sensory Room so much. For once thinking about that really didn't bother me it was more important that he was here with me.

I didn't get a good enough look at the car to decide what it was as he opened the passenger door and put me in the front seat but I was grateful it wasn't so low to the floor. I tried to get comfortable but there just wasn't enough room for me to stretch out, the car was small and only had two doors so there was no way I was going to be able to get in the back and stretch out. As Emmett and Rose looked on it was obvious they weren't going to be able to come with us to hospital.

"Look thanks for coming to get me, but don't waste the rest of your day, Edward can drop me at the ER and I can get a cab home, I have my emergency $20.00 in my sock so I'll be fine" I told them. There was no need for them to spend hours sitting about waiting in the ER, when they could enjoy their day together.

"Are you sure Bella? Ring me as soon as you can ok?" Rose said as she leant in to give me a hug.

I watched as Rose and Emmett spoke to Edward around the back of the car as he walked around to get in the driver's side .As soon as he closed his door I tried to re arrange my leg to ease the pain but it just wasn't possible. He watched me struggle and waited before he started the car.

"Bella put your legs up here" he said tapping his lap. "Come on its ok, I can drive with your feet here and it will keep your ankle elevated".

He leant across and reached for my knee, as soon as his fingers touched me the familiar tingles shot across my skin, the goose bumps emerged and the little hairs on the back of my neck all stood tall. I'd forgotten he had this effect on me, it was a sharp and yet pleasurable reminder of what he could do to my body.

As he cleared his throat, quite loudly, I wondered if he could feel the pull as well.

"Erm….. Is this okay?" he said as he placed both of my calves across his lap, I had swivelled around so my back was against the door and I could stretch out my legs.

"It's fine so long as it doesn't interfere with your driving" I told him.

He started the car and pulled into the traffic and whilst he was concentrating on the traffic which thankfully was light, one hand stayed firmly on my shin and he very gently swept it backwards and forwards. I could see he was following a pattern, he was writing with his fingers on my skin but I was at the wrong angle to see what he was actually putting, I hadn't got the energy or the desire to stop him because the sensation was so soothing.

As we pulled up to the ER he parked as close as he could and then told me to stay put. He got out and returned a few minutes later with a wheelchair, me being me I'd shuffled around until I was sitting with my feet outside the car door. All I needed was a hand to actually stand up and I would be fine.

"Edward, I don't need that" I said to him as I tried to put weight on my ankle, it gave way straight away; Luckily he caught me as I toppled and he dropped me quite unladylike into the chair. Clearly I did need it.

"Stay put while I lock the car and we will get you sorted" he said as he moved around the car collecting his wallet, phone and jacket before engaging the lock. Luckily we weren't too far from the entrance and as he wheeled me in to foyer it was clear the place was heaving, there were people everywhere waiting to be seen.

"Oh shit this is going to take forever. Edward, why don't you leave me here I'll be fine, I'm sure you have far better things to do with your day" I tried to give him an easy out but I was desperately hoping he would stay with me, the thought of him walking away from me now was something I just did not want to comprehend. I knew that even though the circumstances weren't ideal, this was an excellent time to try and straighten things out with him.

"Bella I am not going anywhere, do you really think I would just leave you here?"

I had the good grace to blush and shake my head because deep down I knew he was a good guy.

"Now can I get you anything?" he asked as he found us a space for the wheelchair and a seat for himself.

"Well I really need a shower and a change of clothes, but I'd settle for a bottle of water or a coffee".

"Well I can't do much about the shower but beverages I can do, stay put" he said again.

"Edward I really can't go anywhere you know, you don't have to keep telling me to stay where I am"

"Bella you have walked away from me twice now, I'm not letting that happen again so stay put and I will bring us both drinks, I think we might be in for a long wait". He leaned down and gently kissed my forehead before walking off and all I could do was stare at his gorgeous muscular ass as it walked away from me.

I couldn't help put stare, my forehead was tingling from his kiss and as I reached up and touched the spot his lips had just been on I knew my feelings were still as strong as ever ,I must have been off in another world because I didn't hear the reception nurse ask me for my name and Insurance details.

"I don't blame you staring at that fine specimen, is he yours? "she asked.

"I really hope so" I answered without thinking.

I finally saw the doctor about an hour later, Edward and I had been chatting about everything and anything just like good friends could. We talked about Rosalie and Emmett, Alice and Jasper and their fast approaching wedding, his new club and my work. If we had been in any other environment it probably could have been classed as a date.

The doctor confirmed that it was a severe sprain and he strapped it tightly, Edward was hovering all the time watching what the doctor was doing and he asked questions as the doctor explained that I needed to stay off it for at least week. He offered me a pair of crutches but I really didn't want them, I was clumsy enough on two feet, I didn't stand a chance on crutches. Edward helped me back to the car and as we drove away he asked if I wanted to go to Rosalie's.

"Why would I want to go there, Edward? I just want to go home please" I said a little confused.

"Bella you can't get up and about, doctors orders, so how are you going to manage on your own?"

"I'll be fine, all I need to do is get organised and make sure everything is close to hand that I need."

"That's crap and you know it. You'll need help for the next few days around the clock, you are not supposed to put any weight on your ankle remember?".

"Yes, well in the real world how can that happen? My close friends all work so I can't expect anyone to take time off and my family are the other side of the country so that's out , so what else can I do?"

I wasn't trying to be awkward, I was trying to be practical, there really wasn't anyone who could drop everything and look after me.

"I could help out Bella in fact I'd really like to. I could come over and help you get around during the day, make sure that you had everything you needed and when you were settled at night I could go home or better still to make things really easy you could come and stay with me, we would just need to swing by your place and pick up some things for you"

I looked at him amazed; he was offering to look after me and at his place, his sanctuary from the world.

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EPOV

The phone call this morning scared me shitless. All I could see was Bella alone in the park, vulnerable because she couldn't move. I know I was being dramatic and overly protective but as soon as Emmett called to see if he could borrow the car I knew I had to get to her. It wasn't important that we hadn't spoken for a while and didn't part last time on the best of terms, she was my friend and if nothing else and I wanted to be there for her.

As soon as I saw her sat on the bench my heart just melted, exploded, swelled…. shit I'm not even really sure, it just felt different to normal and I knew at that point just how important this woman was to me. I was going to try everything and anything to get her back in my life, starting right now.

As we sat in the ER department waiting for her to be seen we managed to chat like we had before, when we were Edward and Bella just getting to know one another and we moved from one subject to another seamlessly, both of us laughing and giggling as we swapped stories. Everything about this woman was perfect for me and I felt my whole future shift. I wanted to call my mother and tell her to stop looking because I'd found the wife she wanted me to have, but I knew I needed to jump a small hurdle first, I needed to get Bella to open up and let me, Edward, permanently into her life.

As the doctor diagnosed a severe sprain a plan started to form in my mind. Let's face it she was going to be incapacitated for the next few days at least and she was going to need help to do even the most basic of tasks.

If I could get her to my place I could look after her. Spoil her, let her see the real me and hopefully she'd never want to leave.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo

I really need to apologise to AG, she spent ages working through this chapter for me but I just wasn't happy with what I'd done so I have changed loads. If there are any typo's or errors they are mine. I promise not to meddle in future.


	54. Deprivation Chapter 54

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 54

BPOV

I knew I needed help but to go to his apartment wasn't practical was it? I mean I would have to pack clothes, toiletries, my work laptop….. With that I ran out of things I would need. Ok so it wouldn't be a big deal to pack, all I really needed were casual comfortable clothes because I wouldn't be moving about much and maybe some pyjamas and underwear.

"Are you really sure you want me to stay Edward? I mean, I know how private you are about your home, could you really cope with having someone, me, there 24 hours a day for the next week?" This was a big decision and I wanted him to really think about it because if he hated it once I was there that could cause a big problem between us and I really didn't want that. I was finally realising I wanted us to sort everything out.

"Bella, I would love the opportunity to look after you in my home, you're right when you said before that of all your friends I'm the only one who doesn't have a regular job. My existing club pretty much runs itself, the new club is almost complete and I've got the Manager in there getting it ready, I just need to keep an eye on everything. I can do that by popping in and out unexpectedly, to keep him on his toes" he smiled and I felt my insides tighten, that smile would be my undoing.

It might not be a good idea to spend so much time around him because I wasn't that sure I could keep him at arm's length for long, the need to rub my thighs together proved that.

"OK well I need to pack a few things so we need to go to my place please"

"What do you really need? You are going to be in bed for a few days so you don't need any clothes for that, I have some of your toiletries from when I ordered some to send to you and you can use my laptop for work" he seemed to have it all planned out.

"I am not going to be in bed all day and even if I was I would still need pyjamas"

"Oh and here I was thinking you would be naked in my bed, I suppose I could cope with lingerie, but pyjamas are a no no "

I was just about to ask him what the hell he was thinking but then I saw the huge smile on his face, he was teasing me but from the movement I caught out of the corner of my eye in his trouser department he was obviously imagining me naked in his bed.

"Well I suppose I do usually walk around my own home naked, in fact I really don't like clothes indoors so naked would be me at my most comfortable" I teased back.

"Shit Bella! Don't say things like that to me whilst I'm driving, that's really not fair" he said as I burst out laughing.

"Ok your apartment it is for the week, but I really do need to go and get some of my things first" I told him as he turned the car towards my home.

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EPOV

Yes, Yes,Yes! She was coming home with me. All I needed to do now was make sure she was as comfortable as possible, had everything she needed and I look after her so well she'd never want to leave. I turned the car towards her apartment and we chatted as I drove. As soon as we got near her building we started looking for a space to park, I didn't want her to have to walk far seeing as she had declined the crutches.

"You could stay in the car and I could go up and get what you needed" I offered to try and make sure she stayed off her ankle.

"Edward, that's not really practical, I need to get some things together and trying to explain to you what I want and don't want would take ages. How about we go upstairs and I lean on you all the time so I don't have to use my ankle?" she offered

That sounded ok to me, I could put my arms around her, just to support her of course.

"Ok but no fighting me, you need to keep off it totally so we do this my way" I told her.

I pulled the car into a space and asked her for her key, that way we could go straight into the apartment. I jumped out and quickly went round to help her out of the car. After watching her struggle it was just easier for me to reach in and slide my arms under her thighs and around her back.

"what the f…" she started to say

"I told you no fighting me, we are doing this my way ok?"

"But I can at least…."

"Look it's easier this way so just let me get on with it" I told her as I moved her so she was in my arms bridal style again.

"Err can I help you, oh Miss Swan are you ok?" the doorman asked as he realised I had Bella in my arms.

"I've had an accident Albert and my friend here is helping me up to the apartment. I'm going to collect some clothes and stay with him for a few days. Can you keep an eye on everything for me please?" she asked as I was striding through the foyer to the elevator.

"Of course I will Miss" he said as the doors closed.

"You can put me down you know, I can balance on one foot"

"I'll put you down when we get into your apartment and not before, then you can point me I the direction of everything you need and I will pack it for you" I told her.

"Edward I have a sprained ankle that's all, I haven't broken anything".

"I know and if you had broken it, it would probably be easier. You would be in a plaster cast now but you only have a bandage and you are already forgetting the Doc said no weight on it what so ever for the next few days" I was trying to make her understand that she had to let me help her or it was going to take a lot longer for her to heal.

"Ok you win Mr Cullen, I'll do as I'm told for now." Now I'm no dominant but the thought of her doing as I told her made thoughts whizz through my mind that would have made the devil himself blush.

"Whatever are you are thinking about right now? I would love to know, because you have a look on your face I don't think I've seen before" she said as we walked down the hallway to her apartment.

"Believe me Bella, you don't want to know" I said as I kissed her cheek. The surprise on her face as she realised what I had done brought me back to reality; I'd just kissed her.

"Oh shit Bella I'm sorry. I did that without thinking because it felt like the most natural thing to do"

"It's ok Edward I'm pleased that we can be relaxed enough around each other to be able to do that because friends can show affection for one another, can't they?"

Now that was a bit of a kick in the balls; friends. I had friends. Jasper and Emmett were my friends but I didn't want to be affectionate with them, fuck no, I wanted to be with her and only her.

The realisation that I was ready to go exclusive was another step forward for me. I'd always envisaged having an open relationship when I finally decided the time was right to put my mother out of her misery. I'd been hoping that whoever she threw at me would be in the same place I was and we would be together for appearances sake and both of us would be discreet. I know that sounds incredibly sad but it was something I had grown up expecting, it had been drilled into me from a young age that I had to carry on the family name, I had to have a male heir and the woman needed to be from a certain level of social standing. Whilst Bella wasn't what my mother had envisaged as a suitable Daughter in Law she was going to have to get used to it because I was done, she was it for me.

As we walked into her apartment and I put her gently on the couch I took a step back and took a deep breath because the realisation I was in love with her was both overwhelming and yet welcoming. Part of me had known from my second visit into the Sensory Room but the rest of me had taken time catching up, it was definite though. As I stood back watching her trying to get comfortable on the couch I just knew….I loved her.

"Ok let's get you packed Miss Bella. Where is your underwear drawer? I can go rooting, only because I need to pack you some underwear you understand" I said as I ducked out of the way of the cushion she threw at me.

"Edward, please go and put a chair in front of my dresser which I can sit on and get everything I need myself. If you grab a bag out of the closet I can drop things straight into it"

I went into the closet and grabbed the bag I found in there and moved the chair to where she'd asked then I went back to the couch and picked her up again.

"You know you are going to get sick of carrying me everywhere pretty quickly you know" she said as I put her in the chair.

"Not a chance, how could I ever get fed up of having you in my arms?" shit that sounded cheesy Cullen, but the look on Bella's face made me realise it was exactly the right thing to say at that moment.

After placing her gently on the chair I moved to sit on her bed to give her some space and she started to drop clothes into the bag. I saw at least three pairs of pyjamas, numerous panties and bras as well as socks, those tight soft leggings things women wear and some t shirts.

"Ok I need my toiletries; can we go into the bathroom now please?"

"Bella just tell me what you need and I'll go grab them. I have spare toothbrushes and paste so you don't need that and as I said I have another complete set of your shampoo, bodywash and something else that Rosalie told me to get so what do you need?"

"Erm my moisturiser and body lotion are on the side of the sink as well as my toiletry bag. Can you grab that? It is under the sinks in the cabinet, if you could get all those that would be great".

I went to explore her bathroom and found the things she had asked for, so I grabbed them and passed them to her to add to the bag.

"Anything else?"

"I just need my laptop bag, phone charger and my purse then I am good to go" she said.

I wanted to get her out of there as soon as possible so she wouldn't change her mind about staying with me. With that thought I quickly gathered everything together and put it near the door.

"Ok, anything else before I run these down to the car?"

"Erm I hate to ask but do you have groceries in? I mean I have some here we could take with us so they don't go to waste" Bella asked

Why the hell hadn't I thought of that? I didn't have much in and the housekeeper wouldn't be in for a few days.

"I don't have much because I had planned to shop today. Why don't we take what you have here and I can go tomorrow and get what we need." I told her as I waked into her kitchen.

I took out anything that would be no good after the next few days, bagged it and added them to the pile.

"Right let me get these in the car and I'll be back for you shortly, don't move!" I warned her yet again as I picked everything up and took it down stairs.

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BPOV

Ok I could do this. I had everything I needed, my toiletry bag, my birth control pills, a spare razor and emergency tampons, my make- up and a spare hairbrush, everything I should need because a girl has to be prepared.

I took one last look around the apartment and made sure everything was turned off and put away, luckily I had a good tidy yesterday so everything was pretty neat.

"Right are you ready to go?" his voice startled me because I hadn't heard him come back in.

"Yes I'm ready" I said turning towards him.

He came over and once again picked me up bridal style. We went out the door and between us managed to close and lock it. He once again pulled my legs onto his lap so I could stretch out and not put weight on my ankle. When we were both safely seated with the engine running he turned to me and smiled

"You know you might like me looking after you and maybe you won't want to come home" and with that he set off pulling away into the traffic.

"Edward we have a lot to sort out and a lot to talk about. Please don't read anything into this other than us being friends and you helping me out" even as I said it I knew I was hurting him, but we couldn't just pick up where we had left off, he needed to realise how much he had hurt me and how much trust we had to rebuild.

"Bella, I don't want to talk about this while I'm driving but I need you to understand that I am all in here. I want you in my life and not just as my friend but as my partner, my lover, my….. everything. Now I know we have some trust to rebuild so our relationship can move forward but I am determined to do that, I hope you are too. All I ask is that you are honest with me and if you can't see any that you could ever move past our issues let me know now and I will back off and just be your friend."

I gazed out of the car window and tried to organise my thoughts. After that little speech I was conflicted, it was so heartfelt and honest and my lady parts and my heart were screaming at me to jump him right now, but my head was telling me to be cautious and stay away. What was I going to follow?

OooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooThank you to AG and Edlovesme for their support, I couldn't do this without you.

To Judyblue thank you so much for caring ..


	55. Deprivation Chapter 55

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 55

BPOV

We quickly fell into quite an easy and comfortable routine and after several arguments I was finally allowed to sleep in his guestroom. Edward's logic that he needed to be near me to help me at all times didn't stand up to me sleeping in his bed with him. I tactfully pointed out to him I didn't need help sleeping but he counteracted that with I may need help turning over in the night if I needed to change position, unlikely I know and hence I won the argument. My current position is on a huge soft bed which can only be described as lying on a cloud because the mattress is so soft and thick and the thread count on the sheets must be through the roof. Edward's guest room is gorgeous. Simply decorated; a neutral palette with splashes of sapphire blue everywhere, the pattern in the curtains, the throw on the bed, the scatter cushions and the soft rug on the floor. Someone has taken great care with the decorating and design and I love it.

I have my own bathroom which is very modern and luxurious; again white but with splashes of aqua this time. My days here so far have been very relaxing and easy going. Edward has woken me up the last two mornings with breakfast in bed, each day I have had fresh fruit with yoghurt, coffee, juice and a bagel with cream cheese and smoked salmon. I haven't had the heart to tell him I am usually a granola bar on the way to work type of girl because he has put so much effort into preparing everything, plus this is so much nicer.

I've spent my first 2 days here with my ankle propped up on a pillow. Edward kindly spread everything around me I would need, my laptop, my stack of manuscripts that I had at home, the remote control for the television that was on the wall facing the bed and my iPod. In truth I didn't have to move other than to use the toilet and the shower. After another 'heated discussion' it was decided that he could carry me to the toilet but he wasn't allowed to stay in the room while I actually peed. I think asking him if he was into 'those sort of games' made him realise he was trying to be a tiny bit too helpful! It's not like even I could fall off the toilet.

Edward was in looking after me overdrive and even though his new club was nearing completion I couldn't get him out of the apartment. So far he had spent most of the time just sat on the bed with me, with his laptop in case I needed anything. No matter how many times I told him to get on with his day and leave me to it he would look at me with these great big puppy eyes and say "what happens if you need me and I'm not here?" this was usually followed up with "I promised you I was going to look after you, now let me"

Now I know Edward's apologies were heartfelt, and this was his way of making it up to me, but this was too much. His life had been on hold for me for the last three days so it was time to get things back to normal. I am going to get up today and decamp to the sofa so Edward can see I'm getting better.

As I lay here in this amazing bed the apartment is quiet, either Edward isn't up yet or he has gone out for supplies, so with an ability known only to people who are regulars at hurting themselves I am able to slide out of bed, crawl on my knees to the bathroom and using the sink and the toilet basin I'm able to get myself up and into the shower without placing my foot on the floor once. Now the hard work really starts because I have to take off the bandage, get undressed and shower. Luckily there is a small bench seat in the shower so I sit and strip off my pyjamas and underwear and try to decide how to tackle the bandage. I really shouldn't get it wet in case Edward doesn't have any more but I am really in need of a shower. The sensible thing would have been to wrap the bandage in plastic but I didn't think of that until now, so I can either crawl back naked into the bedroom to look for something or I can just worry about it later. The shower won, so I quickly removed the bandage from my ankle and after taking a minute to admire the wonderful array of colours it was, I switched on the shower and stood out of the way enough to wait for the warm water. As soon as it came through I was under it and the feeling was amazing, I hadn't realised just how grimy I felt, in fact other than a quick rub down with a warm face cloth I hadn't been able to clean up since my accident. I must smell awful, Edward has been so kind not mentioning the essence of stale sweat and used running shoes clinging to my skin.

As he had told me, there was a complete set of my toiletries in the shower, body wash, shampoo and conditioner. I guess that should have freaked me out a bit but I knew Rosalie had to be feeding him information to get on my good side. All of his choices of chocolates, cakes, flowers and toiletries were either my favourites or from my favourite shops. That was too much of a coincidence unless he was having me followed before, which I know he wasn't.

After a good scrub I felt so much better, I tried to put my ankle on the floor and while it was still painful and tender I could actually put a little weight on it, not wanting to tempt fate I did a rather ungraceful manoeuvre to get out the shower but as soon as I was wrapped in the big fluffy towels I sort of hopped and limped my way back to the bed. The apartment was still silent so I quickly dried off, applied my lotion and pulled on clean underwear, yoga pants and a tank top. I towel dried my hair and pulled it up into a messy top knot and started to limp/hop out into the hallway, just as I rounded the corner to go into the main room the front door opened

"Isabella Swan, what the fuck are you doing out of bed?" was shouted across the room at me. My first thought was that my father was somehow here but as I looked across Edward was coming into his apartment laden down with grocery bags. He quickly dropped everything in the entry and came running over, before I could say a word he had me in his arms, bridal style, again and he was walking back to the bedroom.

"Wait a minute Edward, I don't want to be in there anymore, I need a change of scenery" I tried to tell him. The look on his face was priceless, you would have thought I'd asked him to hurt a small puppy, "Edward I just want to sit on the sofa please, that's all I need, to come out of the bedroom"

He sighed and turned around. "You really shouldn't have done that Bella, what would have happened if you had fallen and I wasn't here to help you?"

I couldn't believe how much I had hurt him, he didn't have to say anything it was written all over his face, which made me feel awful. After making sure I was comfortable and placing my foot on a cushion on the table in front of me, he just shook his head when he saw I had taken off my bandage.

Now I am an independent, self-sufficient woman, I know all the words to' I will survive' by Gloria Gaynor and can sing it when I'm very drunk, but watching Edward try and not show how upset he was ,well it was making me wish I was one a woman from a fifties TV shows. You know the ones that stayed home and cooked and cleaned while hubby took care of everything else, either that or even better a sub and Edward was my Dom. I wanted to please him and I hated that he was sad or upset and I'd caused it.

"Edward please come and sit down I need to talk to you".

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

EPOV

As I wander round the supermarket, dropping anything and everything I think may tempt Bella to stay, into the trolley I can't help but smile, I'm shopping for two people. These last few days have been heavenly, she has only been in my home for a short time and I've already decided I don't want her to leave, ever, if possible. The change in me is massive, whilst I was convinced it was an overnight realisation, I knew deep down that I had started to see thing differently after my second meeting with Strawberry Girl. By the time I was dating 'Bella' I knew I could no longer go back to alleyway sex and the anonymous pick-ups that had become my MO.

I wanted it all and taking Bella breakfast in bed yesterday morning had brought me both great pleasure but continued my torture. My poor dick had been solid permanently for about 36 hours, that first night she was here I lay in my bed listening out for her half hoping she would invite me into her bed and the other half praying she didn't need me. I didn't really sleep much and around 3.00am I had had to relieve the ache in my balls, they were practically throbbing with the need to be emptied so just like I was about 14 years old again, I managed to have a silent orgasm that ended up all over the bedding. Knowing that wouldn't be the last of the night I didn't bother changing the sheets, I just moved over to the other side of the bed and tried to sleep. After a 5.00am release I had to get up and change the sheets as there were splashes everywhere. Just like at 14 I wasn't able to multitask and catch everything in a tissue.

My shower at 7.30am to try and wake me up finally managed to see me empty my balls and I was able to relax until I walked into my guestroom with the loaded breakfast tray and saw Bella lying in my guest bed. She looked so relaxed, her hair was spread over the pillow and her face was pointing to the window, she was snoring lightly and all I could do was stare. I really wanted to kiss her but I knew that it was quite stalkerish to be standing watching her so I backed out of the bedroom and after quietly closing the door I knocked loudly waiting for her to wake.

The rest of the day was spent in my opinion in the best way possible, sat on the guest bed with Bella as we talked, watched TV and looked at her manuscripts. I made a light lunch of sandwiches and potato chips and we just chilled. She needed help to get to the bathroom and that caused a few heated words but other than that we were fine.

Now as I get back home it take two journeys to get all my shopping bags up to the apartment (because I've bought so much when I really only popped out to get some fresh bagels), and as I open the door I'm met with the sight of Bella trying to hop around the apartment. My mouth opened and the words fell out before I could even stop or edit them

"Isabella Swan, what the fuck are you doing out of bed?"

Shit! As soon as I heard what I'd said I knew I'd fucked up, I sounded like an old fashioned doctor or even worse her father. Before I could get out an apology she rounded on me

"Wait a minute Edward, I don't want to be in there anymore, I need a change of scenery"

Ok now this was bad, I still needed time to make her see I was someone she could rely on, someone who would care for her and love her.

"Edward I just want to sit on the sofa please, that's all I need to come out of the bedroom" she said and my heart restarted, ok, we were ok, I could work with this.

"You really shouldn't have done that Bella, what would have happened if you had fallen and I wasn't here to help you?"

I knew I was laying it on thick, the puppy dog eyes, the tilted head and the almost pout, everything that had got me out of trouble with the succession of nannies I'd had, but I needed to use everything in my arsenal to make her stay. I thought I'd got through to her but she said the words every man dreads.

"Edward please come and sit down I need to talk to you".

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	56. Deprivation Chapter 56

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Deprivation Chapter 56

BPOV

As soon as I'd said it I could see he'd taken it the wrong way and I suppose as I replayed the conversation we had just had in my head, that it was only way he could take it.

"Edward please don't take this the wrong way all I wanted to say was that you don't need to baby me, I'm getting better every hour and all I wanted was a change of scenery, I was going to set up camp out here and then ask you to bring everything through for me. I also need your help with rewrapping my ankle please."

His smile lit up the room as he started to pick up the groceries and move them to the kitchen.

"Ok sweetheart, sit tight and I will put this lot away and then get a bandage"

Neither of us commented on the fact he had called me sweetheart, it was easier to just let it go. I sat back on the couch and rearranged myself so I could see out of the huge windows that looked out of the city, the view was amazing and much more entertaining than the wall in the bedroom, even if that did have a TV attached to it.

"OK I haven't had to do this in ages, but I'm sure I can remember" Edward said as he gently picked up my leg and slid onto the table. He sat facing me with my leg resting gently on his thigh. He un-wrapped the bandage and then picked up a tube of cream he'd bought in with him.

"They swear by this at the gym I use, it is supposed to bring the bruising out quickly and help to soothe them".

Very gently he started to rub the cream all over my foot, his fingers stroked ever so gently all over my instep, my sole and even between my toes. His touch was light and soothing, he was being so gentle, When he started to rub around my ankle I expected it to be painful, but I was so relaxed and so turned on that I just sank back in to the couch and let him get on with it. He was being so careful, his fingertips pressed lightly on my skin as they swirled the cream around and around. I could feel the goose bumps rising as he touched me and the darker the area of bruising the lighter his touch became. My mind started to wander as I imagined him working his way up my leg, to play in the area behind the back of my knee that I knew was supposed to be a major female erogenous zone but unfortunately hadn't had much use yet. My breathing increased and I could feel the wetness starting to gather between my thighs; my bits were smiling again, a great big wide smile that had only ever happened twice for me. As I sat there I realised he was the common denominator, his hands, his tongue, everything about him excited me and turned me on. I needed to get this sorted out so we could move forward and try and have an honest relationship.

I relaxed a little more and just let my body feel his fingers on my thighs , the warmth of his hands through my thin yoga pants fuelled my lust and I knew I was fidgeting and almost moving into his fingers. As his fingertips grazed down the crease between my thigh and my pussy lips I suddenly came to my senses.

"Hey I don't think I've any bruising up there" I said as I slapped his hand.

He just grinned, that grin that I knew had been getting him out of trouble for the past 20 years or so.

"Sorry I got carried away, listening to you moan and feeling your skin heat was just so intoxicating"

"Yes well moaning or not, I need you to wrap my ankle please"

He set about wrapping my ankle and I could tell he had watched how the doctor had done it when I was discharged. He was concentrating so hard as he went round and round from my toes to my mid-calf, he was gentle and caring and I couldn't help but smile at the fact he was concentrating so hard his tongue was actually poking out.

"There, all done, that should support it, we'll need to put some more cream on tonight before you go to bed ok" he said and I immediately had thoughts of making sure I had very short pyjama shorts on tonight when he did that!

The rest of the day passed quickly. Edward made breakfast, we had bagels with yoghurt and fruit again along with a tasty new coffee be bought at the store. The apartment smelled amazing as he ground the beans the put them in his coffee machine. His kitchen skills were certainly coming out, he had lots of kitchen gadgets that he obviously knew how to use and did.

I tried to read my manuscripts but to be honest I was more interested in talking to Edward. We talked about our school days, college experiences and friends in fact the only subject we didn't touch cover was Edward's family. I was ok with this because he didn't seem to want to discuss them, fair enough, I wasn't that close to mine either. I called home once a week as we arranged but I hadn't been back to Washington State now for about three years.

After a quick lunch which he somehow managed to prepare and serve with very little fuss, we moved on to talk about our favourite books, movies and actors, we had done this before when we had been dating but we were both treating this as 'the first time' I suppose you could say we were able to have a ' do over' moment. He spent all day looking after me, I didn't have to move , everything he could think that I would need was on hand, he had even ordered fresh flowers to be delivered for me.

I sat watching him busy himself in the kitchen, he wanted to cook a special dinner, and I realised just how glad I was we were getting this second chance. I could have been my normal stubborn self and whilst I had been planning to call him who knows how long it would have actually taken me. I wanted him in my life, in my bed and in my home, where ever that was. With that realisation I needed to start working on building our relationship back up and to do that we needed to finally clear the air and have a proper discussion. I needed to tell him how I actually felt, I'd kept him hanging after his declaration in the car on the way home from the hospital and that really wasn't fair to him.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

EPOV

I had everything ready for her surprise tomorrow, so long as her ankle held out we'd be ok, with that thought in mind I realised I was going to have to torture myself again putting cream on her ankle. I was getting a little scared that someone somewhere had dropped several little blue pills in my coffee at some point because despite having to sort myself out twice so far today I'm hard again. I know it's the thought of touching her, of having her here in my home, but it's getting ridiculous just how much she is affecting me.

I try to adjust myself as I mix the salad and drop the home made onion rings into the fryer, the steaks are resting and the fries are keeping warm in the oven. I'm recreating our meal from that first night when she thought MM had stood her up, I've even got a bottle of the same wine. I'm hoping she will realise what it is, I want to start again, go back to the time when Edward and Bella started only this time without MM lurking in the background.

I set my dining table and after putting the food out I ask Bella if she wants some help. Nodding yes I pick her up and hold her tight to my chest for the few steps to the table. I place her carefully in her chair, I hope the cream hasn't made her ankle worse; she seemed able to put a little weigh on it this morning.

Dinner was delicious even though I say so myself and the wine was crisp and sharp, just how I like it. We talked and talked and talked, in fact it wasn't until she let out a yawn that I realised we had been sitting at the table for three hours.

"Would you like anything else to drink or a nightcap perhaps ?" I asked

"I could go for something sweet if you have anything" Bella replied

Now I'm not a desert sort of guy so I didn't think to bring anything like that, I don't even keep ice cream in the freezer.

"Not really, the only thing I have is cocoa, I often have a mug if I can't sleep at night."

"Oh that would be lovely, would you mind if I went and freshened up and got ready for bed while you are making it?"

"No that's fine, it will take time for the milk to heat "

"Oh you make it properly with hot milk, not powder and the kettle"

"Yes I was taught years ago to make it with hot milk in the pan and to grate chocolate on the top, it's something I really love now"

Bella gave me a very funny look and hobbled off to the bedroom, funny it seems she can put weight on it again.

I got everything out to make the cocoa and put the milk in the pan, I knew I had to concentrate and watch this, I'd learnt the hard way that burnt milk or the smell of it is not easy to get rid of. I put the cocoa powder in and started to stir, and as it started to thicken and warm through I poured it into two glasses and adding squirty cream and mini marshmallows on the top.

I took the mugs into the lounge and put them on the table by the couch and then I remembered I would need the cream for her ankle. I dashed into my bedroom and grabbed it along with a fresh bandage. As I came out into the hallway I was met with a sight that would satisfy my dreams and showers for the rest of my life, Bella was hobbling along the short hallway in the tiniest pair of shorts I had ever seen, in fact I'm not even sure they were shorts, they could have just been panties.

My poor dick was back to solid status after a few hours of down time, and this time I knew that touching her was going to bring on a messy end. I couldn't even register what she had on above the waist, because it was impossible to look anywhere else but at her legs and ass. Finally she rounded the corner out of my vision and I took a breath, I needed a second or two before I faced her so I went back into my bedroom. Sitting on the bed with my head in my hands I knew I needed to make a move, we had to clear all the crap up and move forward.

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BPOV

I knew I was being cruel but after the day we'd had but I was ready to move things along, I wanted him turned on and willing to talk so I followed through with my thoughts from this morning and after freshening up I pulled on my favourite summer pyjamas. Part of me wondered why I had even packed them as the weather had definitely turned, but as soon as I saw how short they were I knew it had obviously been in the back of my mind. I had a quick look at the back view and realised you could actually see my panties below the cut of the shorts, so feeling dangerous and definitely turned on I quickly took my panties off leaving me in my shorts and a matching spaghetti strapped top.

I knew I was putting it all out there on show, so to speak, but seeing as I was the one who had been stalling for all these weeks, I felt it was up to me to get the ball rolling.

I hobbled out of my bedroom when I was happy how I looked and made myself comfortable on the couch, there were two steaming cups of delicious smelling cocoa, made I knew just like my Grandma used to. I hadn't had proper cocoa in years, most people just had drinking chocolate you added water to but it wasn't a patch on having the real deal.

I heard Edward before I saw him, he seemed to be banging about in his bedroom, but suddenly he was in front of me and raising my leg so he could sit on the table again.

"We might as well do your ankle now so that when you're ready to go to bed it's done" he said as he started to remove the bandage.

This time he wasn't as smooth and gentle, his breathing was all over the place and he kept shaking his head as if he was clearing it. I was starting to get a bit concerned when he stood up and put my foot down on the cushion.

"I need a minute sorry I think that will be alright for tonight" he said as he rushed out of the room.

I was confused as to what had happened; I couldn't understand what could have caused that sort of reaction in him. I tried to turn around to see where he was but I had to surmise he'd gone to his bedroom. It took a few minutes but as I tried moving my leg up and down I suddenly realised why he was so uncomfortable. The shorts while cut high on my legs weren't tight fitting so as he had raised my leg onto his thigh he would have had a clear view of my recently waxed, very moist lady bits.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

EPOV

Shit! Shit! Shit! How the hell can I go back out there and face her knowing I just totally perved at her lady parts. I should have been a gentleman and not looked but she was just there all open and glistening, I could smell her and as soon as I closed my eyes I was back in the sensory room. It took everything in me not to pick her up and throw her on my bed; I wanted to be buried inside her so badly that the only safe thing for me to do is to just stay in here and wait for her to go to sleep.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

BPOV

"Edward, are you okay?"

I was stood at his bedroom door and I could hear him pacing back and forth in his room.

"I'm fine Bella, I'm just tired, I think I'll turn in for the night"

I was stunned he had gone from being a doting host to hiding from me, just because I didn't think far enough ahead to realise I would become his own personal peep show, and he was trying to be a Gentleman.

I hobbled back into the lounge and made sure everything was cleaned up as best I could as well as locking up for the night. I hobbled back to the guestroom and after a quick wash and freshen up I sat on the bed and tried to decide what to do. I wanted to speak to him, but if he was embarrassed I didn't want to push him. I would stay in here tonight, out of the way, and tomorrow it would be like tonight have never happened.

I lay back on the bed and tried to get comfortable, I needed to sleep and to rest but my mind wouldn't slow down, I knew I was ready to talk about our future and I just needed to get him relaxed and comfortable so we could have the discussion.

An hour later I was still staring at the ceiling, my mind racing through hundreds of different scenarios of what he was thinking about right now. He could be imaging running his hands up the inside of my leg and slowly sinking his two fingers deep inside me, he could be imagining licking my wet puffy engorged pussy lips or ….. he could be fast asleep. I was so turned on it was no good, I needed to speak to him and maybe have a tiny make out session so that we could both have some relief. I mean if he is feeling anything like me he'll need a release too.

Before I could change my mind I was up and half hopped, half hobbled out into the hallway and stood at his bedroom door. I wanted so badly to push the door open and float gently across to him, but in reality I was hardly going to be quiet let alone float anywhere.

As I stood at the door listening I could hear him groaning and for a moment I was worried he was in pain, but I heard him say my name and I knew then that he was experiencing the same feelings I was, just maybe a bit more physically. Quietly I opened the door and I could just make out he was lying on his side facing away from me, he was groaning and swearing quietly, almost under his breath . As I managed to quietly hobble across the thick carpet I picked up the heavy duvet and slid under the covers. My timing was perfect, his back arched and I could tell from the way he slumped in on himself that he had just had one major orgasm.

Suddenly I felt as though I had just invaded a very private moment and I started to second guess whether I should be here or not, but we needed to be open so this was the place to start. I moved towards him so I could cuddle up to him but I stopped quickly

"Edward ,what is all over this bed sheet?"


	57. Deprivation Chapter 57

Deprivation Chapter 57

EPOV

I know I'm awake because I the just had the mother of all releases, in fact it was so powerful I'd better check the wall tomorrow for any rogue splashes. I must have been hearing things because I'm sure I just heard Bella speak to me.

I'm still lying on my side on the very edge of my bed, the only space left that isn't covered in my 'deposits'. This last one had been so strong I'm beginning to think I've caused myself a hernia, my balls are actually starting to look like shrivelled plums because they are so empty at the moment.

"Edward did you hear me, what's all over these bed sheets?"

There is her voice again, Shit I'm even hearing her when I'm awake now.

A sharp prod in my back brings me to my senses and I quickly jump out of bed. I stood there in all my glory, naked as the day I was born and my dick about the same size as then, due to the abuse it had taken over the last few hours.

"What the fuck Bella! What are you doing in my bed, how long have you been there?"

"That's not important Edward l'm more interested on what has been happening in this bed" the smile on her face told me she knew exactly what that was. "Come on lets change the sheets then we can get back in".

I pinched myself twice to make sure I was definitely awake and then watched as Bella proceeded to strip the sheets off my bed. What she didn't know was that they were clean on last night and I don't even know if I have anymore. The housekeeper comes tomorrow and she takes care of all the washing for me. The strange thing was she never once mentioned my state of undress; it was as though she hadn't noticed.

"Edward where are your clean sheets?" she asked.

"Erm I think if there are any they should be in the cupboard in the closet" I told her before remembering that my porn stash from my college days was in the back of that cupboard.

"Wait Bella, let's leave it for tonight it's late, why don't you go back to bed and I'll just crash on the couch" I offered.

"Don't be silly, come and get in with me, just keeps your hands on top of the covers and we'll be just fine" she smirked at me.

Not wanting to miss an opportunity to be in bed cuddled up with her, I quickly pulled on a pair of clean boxers and ran round the bed and followed her out of the door to the guestroom. As she slipped under her duvet I was straight in behind her, "Edward stay over that side and no matter what keep your hands on top of the covers."

"Bella why were you in my bed?" I might as well get the obvious question out there first.

"Well I suppose the best answer is I was feeling 'lonely' and I wanted a cuddle and I wanted to try and talk about us, but if I am really honest I was really turned on at the thought of what happened tonight and I came to you with the intention of maybe of having a bit of a make out session, you know to relieve some …tension, but I guess you managed that perfectly all on your own"

It may have been dark but I could feel the grin that was plastered on her face. Luckily she couldn't see the blush on mine, shit I hadn't reacted like this since high school.

"Oh well if all you wanted was some action I'm sorry you were too late, I seem to have tired myself out, but if you want to talk well maybe I could be persuaded to just hold you while we do".

With that she scooted across the bed and I lifted my arm so she could cuddle up to my side. I placed my hand on her back and gently started to stroke up and down and kissed the top of her head. This was where I wanted to be, right here, right now.

I felt her take a couple of big breaths and I knew she was thinking, contemplating what to say and how to say it. I was trying to decide if I should start the conversation, to help everything along. I was ready to admit that I was in love with her but I didn't know if that would help things or not. Before I could get any further along in my decisions she suddenly started talking.

"Edward, I was so hurt and upset and embarrassed in the bar, all those people hearing about my life, Garrett leaving me to take all the flack and then finding out you were, well we know who you were. I just couldn't take everything in, I needed time to process everything, there were so many things that were suddenly thrown into my face and they led on to other things and before I knew it I was in danger of losing me. I questioned how people I was acquainted with saw me, how my friends saw me, how I was as a daughter, friend, lover, everything. The more I thought about it the more I hated what I was becoming and how distant I was from you. My biggest problem was that I didn't know how to fix it. The more I tried to let you in, the more I forced myself to harden my emotions."

She was close to tears and I really didn't want that, I wanted her to be happy.

"Bella, relax, we can work everything out if you really want to. All I want to know is do you want to? Do you want me? Do you really want to be with me, because if you don't well let's just say this is make or break time for me. For the first time in my life I need to be either all in or we stop this now, I go get on the couch and we go back to saying Hi when we bump into each other at Jasper's"

Shit! I didn't mean it to come out like that, I'd already said all this to her in the car and she had she said she wanted to sort things out. I wasn't planning on laying out an ultimatum, let's be honest anyone with even a tiny streak of fight in them reacts badly to them. I lay there expecting Bella to explode, waiting for her to kick me out and onto the couch when she snuggled closer into me.

"I want in all the way as well, I'm sorry it has taken me so long to tell you that and we have lots to talk about but I know I want you in my life Edward that much I know for sure".

I couldn't help myself,

"Thank fuck for that, for a minute there I thought you were going to dispatch me to the couch and I would end up a sad lonely old man who would have probably died from too many self-induced orgasms."

"What a way to lower the tone of the moment" she said playfully tapping my chest, I reached across and gently raised her face up to look at me, her eyes were shining and I couldn't make out whether they were unshed tears of sadness or happiness, hoping for the second I leaned down and finally captured those soft plump lips with mine.

It was a gentle kiss, slow and short, I pulled back and then kissed her again and again. No tongues or teeth just gentle extended pecks. I wanted her to feel safe and loved and however much I wanted to be inside her, well that could wait, our first time as Edward and Bella had a lot to live up to and I didn't want to ruin it. Apart from that I'd come so many times tonight already I wasn't sure my poor dick could take any more action.

"Bella let's get some sleep, we have both had a long day and I have a surprise for you tomorrow, so I need you to well rested".

"What sort of surprise?"

"A nice surprise, so don't askquestions, just rest, come on".

I kissed her again and then pulled her even closer to me, she snuggled in so her head was tucked into my neck and her whole body was pressed against the side of me. I didn't usually sleep on my back but I certainly wasn't going to move and disturb her now. I bought my other arm around and wrapped both arms around her and had no intention of ever letting go.

Sleep must have eventually found me because the next thing I know I'm waking up naturally, for a second wondering why I was in my guestroom, then I felt the warmth of her body. We'd moved around in the night and we were now both on our sides and I was spooning her, my arms were still wrapped around her but now my legs were wrapped around her as well. There wasn't a part of me that wasn't touching her and I couldn't have been happier, well I could we could have both been naked, but after last night I knew we would get there so I was going to be patient.

She was still fast asleep, so I needed to make a decision, I really needed the bathroom not only to deal with the raging morning wood I had but also to pee. Getting out of bed was going to wake her though and I really wanted her to rest. I slowly unravelled my legs and tried to roll her a little so I could get my arm free but she wasn't having any of it, as I tried to move away she followed me across the bed. In the end I just had to shake her.

"Good morning Gorgeous, let me up will you please I need the bathroom" I said as I stroked her arm.

"Come back to bed" she said as she turned over and snuggled into the warm spot I'd just left.

I watched as her breathing evened out and I knew she had gone back to sleep. This gave me chance to set up her surprise, so I quickly dealt with my needs in the bathroom, I wasn't sure which was quicker, emptying my bladder or coming in the shower. I was seriously shocked I had any sperm left I was slightly scared I'd actually emptied the tank permanently last night.

After drying off I threw on some sweats and scooped up my sheets from the floor and threw them in the washing machine. I really wasn't sure if I had any more clean ones and I didn't need to explain to my housekeeper why I had used them all.

As soon as the machine was running I grabbed my phone and called Carmen my interior designer, she was in on the surprise and was waiting for the ok to get all the final details ready. I told her to be ready for us about 3.00pm, which gave us time to have a leisurely breakfast, get ready, talk some more and do whatever we needed to do. Now did I make breakfast or go back to bed? The decision was made for me by Bella shouting my name so I went back to the bedroom and she was sitting up, her hair was ruffled, the straps of her top were falling off her shoulders and she was rubbing the sleep from her eyes, and she had never looked more beautiful.

In that moment I understood what Jasper and Emmett were talking about, they had tried to explain to me that there some moments in your life when you looked at your woman and you just knew she was it for you. They had both had those moments with Rosalie and Alice and were waiting for me to catch up. She looked so vulnerable, so in need of protection and just so right in my home, I just wanted to hold her in my arms and never let go.

"Where did you go I thought you were coming back to bed" she asked.

" I just had a few calls to make but I've done them now, so do you want breakfast now or….?"

"No breakfast can wait I want my bed warmer back" she grinned as she fell back on to the pillows and pulled back the duvet.

Not needing to be asked or told twice I whipped off my sweat pants and jumped straight into bed.

"Edward you're naked" she said

"Well spotted Bella, I had a shower this morning and just threw some sweats on, if it's a problem I can put some boxers on"

"No its fine, just keep your hands above the duvet please, I 'm not sure what spare sheets you have for this bed" she grinned as she turned away from me. She reached behind her and pulled me to spoon her again, now this was torture, her ass was pushed into my rapidly expanding dick and I knew she had to be able to feel it.

"Bella I'm not sure this is such a good idea. I don't want to rush anything between us because I want it to be when we are both ready" I said as I tried to move my dick away from her.

"Edward we're not rushing anything, we have already had sex remember?"

"No we haven't. Mystery Man and Strawberry Girl have had mind blowing kinky sex, Edward and Bella are yet to make love and I want that to be very special not a morning quickie" I was trying my very best but I was about ten seconds away from attacking her, any inclination she was feeling the same and I was afraid all my good intentions would fly out of the window.

"Ok, I can see the logic in that" she said as she moved away from me slightly. "As much as I would love to spend the day in bed with you, you need to put your sweats back on and go and start breakfast. I'll have a quick shower and then we can talk and you can tell me about my surprise."

She started to get up and all I could do was watch as she collected some clean clothes and undies and started to hobble to the bathroom.

"You really shouldn't be putting any weight on the ankle you know" I said as she disappeared into the en-suite

"You shouldn't be naked in my bed while I'm not there, but, hey" she said as I heard the shower start.

Should I join her, yes or no? That was the only thought in my mind as I lay in her bed. I desperately wanted to but I knew I wouldn't be able to stop myself taking her against the shower wall, so that made my decision for me. I quickly got out of bed and went into my bedroom. I had another quick shower, this time cold, and threw on my sweats and a t shirt. I was cooking bacon and scrambled egg by the time Bella limped into the kitchen.

"I'm wasn't joking you really shouldn't be putting so much weight on that ankle Miss Swan, it needs to heal" I said as I picked her up and carried her over to my dining table. The table was set and my mother would have been so proud. I lowered her into the chair, "don't move" I said as I leant forward and kissed her on the lips.

I quickly went back to the kitchen and plated up the bacon and scrambled eggs and brought the plates over. I went back a second time for the two mugs of coffee I 'd made already. I sat down and watched as she tucked in.

"I'm so hungry this morning, it must have something to do with having the best night's sleep I've had in years" she said as added toast to her plate.

"I felt so loved in your arms last night" she blushed as she suddenly realised what she'd said " I don't mean that err I mean I felt safe err"

I cut her off to stop her embarrassment, "I know exactly what you mean, I had a good night as well, it just felt right" was all I could think to say, I certainly wasn't going to tell her I was in love with her.

"Do you want to talk while we are eating, or would you prefer to wait until later?" I asked, I really wanted to move this forward so we were both sure we wanted the same thing and we were both in the same place.

"I'm happy to talk now, what do you want to know?"

"Well my first question may seem basic but I have to know, how do you feel about me now?"

Bella put down her cutlery and looked at me. "I will be honest I was falling for you in a big way, but with everything that happened, I pushed my feelings away and locked them down as much as I could. I tried keeping them under control but every time I saw you or someone mentioned your name or even when I was sitting at my desk just daydreaming, all I did really was think of you. These last few days have just brought everything to the surface and I am right back where I was before that awful night".

I just sat looking at her, amazed at her honesty and openness. I wasn't really expecting that so early in the conversation, it caught me out because I was ready to have to drag the information out of her.

"I think it's only fair you answer your own question Edward, how do you feel about me?"

The words were out before I could stop them, not that I really wanted to but well ….too late

"I'm in love with you Bella and I have been for a while."


	58. Deprivation Chapter 58

Well ladies and gentlemen ( I know I have some male readers from the reviews and messages I've received)this is it the final chapter of my story. I have loved writing this and I am really going to miss these characters especially Rosalie. I will do an epilogue or a future take or maybe a few outtakes so I'm not going to call it complete just yet.

I need to say a huge thank you to Alison, she listens to me at all times of the day, no matter what she is doing and she always has a suggestion, an idea or the patience to just let me ramble.

To Tracy who sits up late at night looking over the emails I send her so she can get it back to me as soon as she can.

To Ladyletters who reminds me this is just for fun and not to get too stressed out about everything.

I also want to say a huge thank you to all my reviewers, it has been a huge pleasure reading your guesses, ideas, rants and suggestions. With that in my mind I need to mention Donna, Judy, kate 1386 , shecater, Edwardsfirst kiss and the very special Rita01tx who have been with me from the beginning.

 **Deprivation Chapter 58**

EPOV

I couldn't believe I'd just said that, I'd been so careful for these last few days, keeping my feelings and everything under wraps but it was too late now, it was out there. I looked at Bella who just sat staring at me, I was trying to gauge her reaction but at the moment there only seemed to be a stunned silence. The silence carried on for what seemed like ages but was in fact probably only a few seconds but however long it was I wasn't coping well with the wait.

Finally I had to break the silence,

"I know hearing that maybe a bit of a shock and now is probably not the best time to tell you but Bella to be honest I couldn't keep it in anymore. I'm not sure if you have totally forgiven me yet, but I am hoping that you are at least part of the way there and maybe feel a bit of what I'm feeling?"

Still just silence. Bella was looking at me as if she was searching my face for something, whatever it was I sat still and waited for her to process what she had just heard.

Suddenly she shot out of the chair and was in my lap before I could fully appreciate what was happening.

Her lips were on mine. Those sweet sweet lips I'd been dreaming about for weeks were pressed hard against mine. I could feel her tongue trying to gain entrance into my mouth, her hands had buried themselves in my hair and she was clutching on to it tightly. As I caught up with what was happening I realised I could feel heat as she straddled my thighs, the heat from her pussy rubbing against me. This was so unexpected, I was too stunned to respond, I just sat there as she tried to deepen the kiss again.

Realising I wasn't participating she pulled back and looked at me

"Don't you want this Edward? I thought we were finally in the same place"

I sat staring at her like I was a shy seventeen year old virgin, trying to catch my breath and get my thoughts in order.

"Of course I want this Bella, but we have somewhere to be right now so how about we get ready, have a wonderful day and then we can relax tonight and see how we feel"

"Edward I know how I feel. I've known for a while and now I know how you feel, well we don't need to wait anymore, let's see how this goes now"

It took all of my mental strength and every ounce of restraint I had but I managed to stand up and place Bella gently on her feet.

"I have something special planned so please go and get ready. You'll need comfortable clothes and some flat shoes, sneakers if you have them". I told her as I moved myself away from her, her scent was as strong as ever and I was so close to saying 'fuck it' and just spending the day buried inside her. I now knew it was what we both wanted

"I need a few minutes to get changed and then we will be ready to go"

I walked away from her and quickly shut myself in my room. It was just coming up for 11.30 am so we were a little early, but I really didn't trust myself around her at the moment. I quickly texted Carmen and asked her to be ready for us within the hour and as soon as she texted me back confirming everything was in place I started to get everything together that I needed.

"Bella are you ready?" I shouted

"I'm coming" was the reply, I had to smile at the thought that went through my mind, hopefully we both would be soon enough.

As she made her way towards me I couldn't help but notice how much easier she was walking on her ankle. The last few days of rest had obviously helped a lot. I was a little relieved as well because she needed to be able to walk at the club, I couldn't really carry her all the way round and I'd learnt quite quickly she wasn't going to use crutches or a wheelchair.

She looked stunning, the tight yoga pants showed her shapely legs and the thin top that seemed to drape off one shoulder showed just enough skin to make me wonder what was under the material. It didn't matter that I'd touched every inch of her, I wanted to explore her all over again.

"Come on let's go" I said as I walked towards the door.

"Where are we going?" she asked

"It's a surprise, you'll know soon enough"

We got in the car and headed towards my new club, I knew she would recognise the neighbourhood when we got close enough, but for now I was enjoying keeping her guessing.

"Where is the Aston Martin I haven't seen you drive It lately?"

"I told you before, I only bring that out for special occasions, when I'm just running around town it's easier to use this one".

"Oh, so this isn't a special occasion then?".

I knew she was teasing me, the smile on her face gave her away as she tried to hide it with a pout, but it really didn't work. As I looked at her a thought struck me, she looked happy, that glow was back, the one that I'd seen in the few weeks we'd been together before, it had been missing over the last few weeks. I now understood what Rosalie was talking about, Bella did look happier now, hopefully that had a lot to do with me.

"Oh it's a very special occasion, see you even have your own invitation Miss Swan" I handed her the cream envelope that I had personally hand written for her.

"Oh, what's this?" she said as she carefully opened it and pulled out the cream card that was embossed and edged in Navy Blue. As we pulled up at some traffic lights I watched her slowly run her fingers over the words. She was caressing the card, almost feeling the words through her fingers, I couldn't help myself and a shiver ran down the length of my spine and ended up in my balls, reenergizing them.

" _ **Edward Cullen cordially invites you**_

 _ **to join him at the opening of his new establishment."**_

She didn't bother reading out the rest of the information in the card she just smiled and made herself comfortable, now she knew where we were going I watched her visibly relax.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

BPOV

As soon as I realised where we were going I was happy, we were going to see his new club, then another thought struck me

"Edward I'm hardly dressed for an official opening, why didn't you warn me?"

"Don't worry sweetheart you look stunning, but just in case you are worried though it's a very private showing today, the only guest is you"

"Just me?"

"Yes the official opening isn't for another week. Everything is ready, the memberships are already in place for the 300 members that have already been accepted and we are ready to go."

"So today is like a dry run then, we are going to be testing everything then are we?"

"No we are going to be relaxing in total privacy, we will be the only ones in the place. I've asked that all the staff be out of the club for at least 6 hours so we can have the place to ourselves."

"So what sort of things do you have planned for us?" I asked as my mind started to think about an afternoon of pampering.

"Well whatever you want, we can relax around the pool, use the Jacuzzi, sauna or steam room I've arranged lunch to be laid out for us and if you want anything else we can always arrange it. Even though we will be alone all the staff are aware they are on call so if you want a massage or some pampering it can be arranged."

I couldn't believe what he had done, this was the perfect way to spend an afternoon, we could just relax and be us.

As we pulled into the small parking lot at the side of the club I couldn't help but glance up the block. I really had no intention of going back to DESIRE but I had to be able to look back on my few weeks there and not think about Renee and Garrett all I wanted was to be able to concentrate on what Edward and I had had there.

I was bought out of my musings by Edward opening my car door

"Would you like me to carry you in to save you from walking on your ankle until it's absolutely necessary?" He asked as he started to slide his hand under my legs.

"Well thank you kind Sir, that is very good of you"

He laughed as he picked me up and once I was clear of the car he closed the door with his hip.

"I'll get you settled in the club reception then I'll pop back and get the bag I have ok?"

I nodded and we started to walk towards to the entrance.

It was an automatic door that needed a key card to access, as we walked up I could see the card already in the Edwards hand which he passed to me and I quickly waved it in front of the pad. The door opened and we entered into a dimly lit reception area. The first thing that hit me was the floral smell, it smelt just like my apartment in the days after the debacle in the bar. Looking around it didn't take me long to realise that every bouquet he had sent me back then was replicated here in the reception area.

"Edward I don't want to undermine your Interior Designer but this many flowers in a gentlemen's club might be overkill" I told him honestly.

"Bella everything you see today is for you, believe me it won't look like this the next time we open the front doors".

With that he kissed me on the cheek and sat me in a huge wing backed leather chair that was in a small seating area across from the reception desk.

"I'm just going back out to the car, stay put until I get back love ok" he said as he smiled and stepped away from me.

I nodded and smiled and leaned back into the armchair, it was the most luxurious piece of furniture I had ever sat in, the leather was soft and warm and I could see myself sitting in a library room curled up in it.

I had a look around the reception area, there was another set of chairs and a small occasional table between them, I suppose really they were for show but I could see it creating a scene from years ago. Some well to do gentleman, drinking whiskey from a crystal glass sitting here waiting for his driver to pick him up. The art work on the walls was an eclectic mix of old photographs and strong bold oil paintings, I wouldn't have dreamed of putting them together but they worked so well.

The walls and the flooring were a dark burgundy and while that might sound oppressive, it actually was very welcoming and comforting. As soon as you walked in you were cocooned and safe and it was instantly relaxing. The lighting was subtle and at first glance I couldn't even tell where it was coming from, I was dying to get up and explore but I didn't want to ruin my chances of hobbling around later.

The door latched clicked and started to open, Edward came through the door with two parcels and a bag .

"I'm glad to see you are where I left you, I was sure you couldn't resist the temptation to walk around" he placed one of the parcels and the bag behind the reception desk and then came over to pick me up again.

"I need to put this parcel inside, can you hold it, while I carry you?" he asked.

I nodded and as soon as he placed the parcel in my lap he picked me up bridal style again.

The parcel was very light, it was a box that had a ribbon around it and I was trying to have a discreet look to see if it had a name or brand on the box.

"It's ok you'll be opening shortly because it's for you anyway" he said with a grin. He really didn't miss anything.

The door from reception opened automatically and we were led into another reception area, here doors led off to different places.

"Ok, obviously we don't have female changing rooms, so are you ok to get changed in here with me?"

I looked at him slightly alarmed.

"Edward I don't have anything to wear, you should have warned me we were coming here".

"Don't worry about anything everything has been arranged for you, now where would you like to change?"

"Oh what the hell, you've seen me at my worst so we might as well get changed together" I told him and my lady bits burst into life as that grin appeared on his face.

We went through into the changing rooms and I was surprised to see it looked completely different to what I was expecting. I suppose I'd expected a gym locker room, but this was way past that. There were proper single wardrobes built around the room, so clothes could be hung up on hangers, there were also drawers in the bottom of each. I looked at Edward with what must have been a questioning face.

"The members requested private wardrobes where they could keep clean clothes and supplies. This way I have a captive audience, they can come here after work, use the facilities, and know they have fresh clean clothes to put on, we also offer a laundry service so they can leave the used stuff behind and we will launder it and put it back in the wardrobe for them so it's clean for next time."

He put me down on one of the padded benches in the middle of the room and went towards the wardrobe with a number 1 on it,

"This one is mine. I'm going to get changed now so why don't you unwrap your present and decide what you want to do first".

Now I was confused, I sat staring as he slowly started to undo his shoe laces and place his shoes in the bottom drawer of his wardrobe. Next he took off his socks and placed them inside his shoes, I watched as he started to unbutton the dress shirt he had on and I really couldn't look away so I just made myself comfortable and watched the show for as long as he would let me. As he hung up his shirt on the hanger I couldn't help but lick my lips, this man was absolutely gorgeous both inside and out. Yes we'd had a bit of a hiccup but I knew we were past that, it was definitely time to start looking forward.

The sound of his zipper bought my out of my daydream and I watched as he stepped out of his pants. He carefully folded them and placed then over a hanger so no creases. I could see he had already at some point emptied his pockets and there was a small basket on the top shelf that held his phone, keys, wallet and small change.

"What no condoms this time?" the words were out before I could stop them.

He laughed and shook his head "I told you that was a habit before, I haven't used or needed condoms for quite a while now". The look he gave me was unmistakeable, he was letting me know there had been no one else since he'd met me.

I was just getting my head around this little nugget of information when he pulled down his tight black boxers and stepped out of them.

"Fuck me!" once again my filter seemed to have been disabled and the words were out before my brain engaged.

"I will soon enough sweetheart, but not until I'm sure you are totally ready for me, because as I told you once before, once I do you're mine forever"

He didn't need to be facing me for me to know that he was aroused. His fully erect length was pointing straight up and I was sure I could see it twitching and pulsing. My mouth literally started to water with the many thoughts that were floating around my brain, all the possibilities of what I could do with it, with him. I really wanted to play and tease it, in fact I desperately wanted it inside me, I wanted him in my mouth, I wanted to slide my lips over the silky skin and I wanted to feel him come down my throat. As I marvelled at the spectacle in front of me I couldn't help but do a little silent scream and a little jig inside, I was watching my own private strip show and it was a thousand times better than any porn I'd ever watched, there was no man fixing a washing machine for a start!

WANT WANTWANTWANT was all I could hear in my own head.

Reaching into his wardrobe he bought out a pair of board shorts, now I'm not one to flaunt my body but in that instant I really wanted to suggest we spend the day naked. It would have been worth any awkwardness on my part just to be able to look at him all afternoon.

"Are you going to open your present at all?" he asked as he slipped on the shorts with a very obvious smirk.

"Yes of course"

I was all fingers and thumbs as I tried get the image of him out of my mind and concentrate on the bow on the box. Finally the lid opened and inside was a beautiful cherry red sarong and matching bikini. As I lifted them out of the box my first thought was how glad I was I'd had tided myself up last night with my emergency razor. The bikini was tiny and he had obviously picked it himself, no personal shopper or woman would have thought all that string could be comfortable!

Well comfort wasn't what was I was going for today, today was about looking forward and being together and if he wanted to see me in this tiny bikini then so be it. I slowly stood up and tested my ankle on the floor. It was ok, a slight twinge but nothing else so put a little more weight on it.

I placed the bikini on the bench beside me and turned to face Edward.

"Edward, it's beautiful thank you. Now would you like to help me put it on?" my filter still seemed to be on vacation.

"Yeah of course….., sure I'd love to…., erm… ok what first?" he stammered his way through his reply and I was relieved to realise he was as affected as I was. It was quite adorable really.

I sat back down and offered him my foot, he slowly started to untie my sneaker and then pulled it off and placed it on the bench before going back to slowly peel off the small sneaker sock I had on. His fingers stroked all along my instep and ankle before he placed the sock in my trainer and put my foot down. Next he took hold of my injured ankle and very gently raised my foot, he knelt down and placed my foot on his thighs so he could use both hands to untie my laces, remove my sneaker and the sock. Once he'd done that he started to unwind my bandage, he carefully rolled the old bandage up and then reached behind him and grabbed something from the little basket. As he squeezed the tube in his hand I realised he had bought with him the cream he'd been rubbing into my ankle every night.

"Why don't you leave the bandage off for a while, let the air get to it and you can have a swim if you feel up to it?"

I nodded, too afraid of what I would say if I opened my mouth.

Still kneeling down he brought his hands up and grabbed the edge of my top, looking for permission he waited until I nodded before he raised it over my head. I heard him groan as my lacy bra became visible and I had to hold in a chuckle. He carefully folded my top and laid it on the bench and I wondered what he would do next, would he go for my bra or my yoga pants. I could see the question on his face and he was trying to decide what to do, I very nearly helped him and I was just going to reach behind me when he rose up on to his knees.

He wrapped his arms around me and I felt him take my bra clasp in his hand and with the skill of a man who knew what he was doing he had it open in seconds. He leaned back slightly checking my face as he brought the straps of my bra forward. I loved that he was checking, always checking that he hadn't gone too far, so I pushed my shoulders back and sat upright as he dropped my bra on top of my top. I felt…. Sexy, turned on, strong, desirable you name it I felt it as I looked at the hunger and longing in his eyes. I had no doubt this man really loved and wanted me.

"Shall I stand so you can take off my yoga pants?" I whispered not wanting to break the spell we were weaving.

He nodded and held out his hands so I could use him to take my weight. As I stood up though, it brought my very moist pussy in line with his nose. I heard him groan and as he pushed his face into my lady bits I physically felt him take a huge sniff. I knew he would be able to smell how aroused I was and that would be mixed in with all my products, it was then I realised that whatever happened I was his Strawberry Girl as well as his Bella, She was me and I was her and he would always think of SG when he could smell the combination of me and my products.

I grabbed hold of his hair with the sole intention of grinding my pussy into his face, I was so turned on I would have been quite happy to just spend the afternoon in this changing room while we found out how many different positions this bench was good for, but it seems I brought him back to reality because he pulled his head away and started to shake it.

"Not yet, not yet, not yet" was all I could make out as he seemed to be talking to himself.

"What is the matter? Edward are you ok?"

"Let's just get you into this bikini so we can go out to the pool and relax" he said as pulled down my yoga pants and panties at the same time. I stood before him naked and it felt amazing, I was so comfortable, I'd expected to be awkward and fumbling but it was as if it was the natural thing in the world.

"You know as much as I love my new bikini , seeing as we are here alone, we could just leave the swimwear in here" Oh shit where did that come from I swear Rosalie was somehow watching this and working my mouth. That thought made me smile because if that was really true I would already have Edward's dick down my throat.

I looked down at him, the smile from my thoughts still on my face, I watched as his face relaxed and he smiled at me.

"Let's get this bikini on to start with it, I've been dreaming about seeing you in it since I bought it. That said I am not guaranteeing how long it actually stays on".

He picked up the tiny g string bottoms and I put my hand on his shoulder to support me as I stepped into them, he started to pull them up my legs and then caught me unawares as he leaned forward and dropped a quick kiss on my mound before barely covering it as the bikini bottoms settled into place. He went straight back to pick up the top and gently turned me so he could see what he was doing to fasten it. It was a halter neck style that fastened at my neck with a tie and a small clasp in the middle of back. He kissed both places before turning me back towards him. There were no cups in this bikini top, just two very small triangles of material. I could tell it was an expensive two-piece but it was more suited to posing in, probably at the side of a very exclusive resort pool or millionaires' country club, than swimming in but still it was something he obviously wanted to see me in.

He reached into the box and brought out the sarong, it was very flimsy, again not for getting sun lotion or water on but just for lounging in.

"I'm not really sure…" he said passing it to me, so I wrapped it around my waist and secured it in a knot. The material felt amazing against my bare buttocks, so soft, I could feel it clinging to my legs all the way to my ankles.

Taking a few steps back so he could look me up and down he shook his head …. "Fuck Bella! That looks a hundred times better than I could have ever imagined "he said as he made no attempt to hide the fact he was palming his still fully erect dick.

"Come on let's go through " he said as he grabbed hold of me and carried me through the changing room and out into the pool area. Two loungers had been set up with a small table between them, on it I could see an ice bucket with a bottle in it, two champagne flutes a plate of what looked like cut fruit and flowers, more flowers, they were everywhere. The lighting had been adjusted probably as low as it would go and I could see candles flickering in lanterns all around the pool. Even though it was the middle of the day, drapes had been drawn across all the windows to make it feel like it was late in the evening. The candles caused shadows and bursts of light as the glow from the many tiny flames reflected on the shiny tiled surface. The music playing in the back ground was soft and almost barely audible, but it was there and it all added to a huge seduction theme.

"Edward just how many bouquets of flowers are in here?

"Well I tried to work out the number of days I've known you because I wanted to get a bouquet for every day but I didn't give the florist enough notice so this is the entire stock she had available, there are replicas of all the bouquets I sent you when I was trying to say sorry and the rest are for all the days, weeks, years we hopefully have to come. As far as the flower buying goes I think I'm in credit for a couple of years at least."

He put me down on my lounger and stood to take the cork out of the bottle, it went with a dull thud and I watched as Edward poured us both a glass of fizz.

"I'd like to propose a toast. To us, to new beginnings and to lifelong love" he carefully tapped my glass with his and his eyes never left mine as I repeated the toast back to him. We both took a drink and he sat down sideways on the other lounger facing me.

He was too far away, that was my first thought which was quickly followed by the need to touch him. My fingers ached to just run up and down his chest, to play in the sprinkling of dark hair that peaked above the waistband of his shorts and to follow where ever it led.

I couldn't help but rub my thighs together, even I could smell my arousal, because let's be honest there was nothing there to contain it, my bikini bottoms were already wet and no doubt changing colour as I lay there. If I was going to do this I might as well go for it, so I undid the sarong and laid it over the back of the lounger, I carefully arranged myself so I was comfortable, able to reach my drink and anything on the table.

"Would you like some strawberries with your champagne? I know it's corny but they really do bring out the flavours of each other" Edward said as he stood and stepped around the table so he was at my side.

I nodded "yes please that would be lovely" and I looked up at him.

He picked up the plate of cut fruit and placed it on my thighs before turning back to the table and picking it up. He moved it back a few feet so he was able to pull his lounger across so it was flush against mine. He seemed to be rearranging some things onto the floor before he picked up his glass from the table as settled himself back down.

"Now strawberries" he said as he picked up one from the plate, he held it by the stalk that was still attached and gently drew it all the way across my bikini bottom, up across my stomach around my navel and up to the space between my breasts. Once it got there he moved it to my glass, dunked it in the champagne and then gently rested it on my bottom lip. I could feel drips of the bubbly liquid running between my breasts.

"Open wide Bella but don't eat the stalk its bitter"

Without any thought I opened my mouth and accepted the strawberry, my lips closing around the tips of his fingers. He nodded and I bit through the luscious fruit so he could take the stalk away.

"Was that good? "

I could only nod, for once my filter had done its job and rendered me mute.

"Ok a little different this time" he picked up another strawberry and followed the same path, this time when we got to my navel he stopped and turned to reach for something, "this is one of the finest balsamic vinegar produced" he said as he placed a small dish over my naval," it is supposed to be the natural partner to strawberries" with that he rolled the end of the strawberry in the balsamic and then brought it to my lips. The taste was divine it was more like a sweet wine than a vinegar and mixed with the tartness of the strawberries it just made my taste buds sing.

The groan I let out as the taste exploded in my mouth was matched by the groan coming from Edward, he was already dipping another strawberry in my champagne.

"After this one we can try something else if you'd like" he said as he let the champagne drip all over my chest.

"I think you should clean up that champagne before we do anything else" I told him as I felt the splashes once again run down between my boobs.

"I'm quite happy to do that"

I watched as he leaned forward and started to kiss across my chest, his lips gently ghosting and then nipping as he concentrated on the area left uncovered by the tiny bikini top. I couldn't help but sigh as the emotions and feelings all bubbled up at once.

"Oh Edward that feels amazing" I couldn't stop myself from stretching and pushing my boobs towards him, I needed more, I needed him everywhere.

"Bella I want you so badly, please tell me I'm forgiven, tell me you want me" he said as he continued kissing down my torso. He stopped to remove the tiny dish and when he turned back he kissed all around my belly button before carefully teasing me with his tongue. I closed my eyes and brought my hands up to play with his hair, I loved the feel of the unruly mop, it was so soft, just as I remembered it. I scratched my nails across his scalp, slightly tugging and grasping at his roots.

"Fuck Bella if you keep on doing that I'm not sure I can behave for much longer".

"Edward I don't want you to behave, in fact I insist that you don't behave, I want you to be very naughty"

As soon as I said it I realised it sounded a lot better in my head than actually out loud. I couldn't help myself, I started to giggle and that made both of us laugh out loud. As we both dissolved into laughter I physically felt any residual tension and indecision leave us.

I knew as I looked at him that we would have an amazing life together.

"Edward there is nothing to forgive, I love you and I want us to be together forever."

The joy on his face as he breathed out a huge sigh of relief cemented my decision, we were going to be fine.

He made a move towards me and I knew we were finally going to make love as Bella and Edward, here beside the pool in this beautiful room surrounded by flowers and candles where we could finally explore each other fully.

As I thought about it another idea entered my head, something that we needed to address.

I quickly stood up and held out my hand," Edward do you have an office here?" I asked as he looked at me confused.

"Yes Bella I do, why?"

"Show me please"

I could tell he was confused, one minute we were getting ready to be intimate, the next I'm asking for a tour of his office, I was just hoping this wouldn't backfire and the designer had been traditional with the furnishings.

He swept me up into his arms without questioning me and walked away from the pool area .We went down a long corridor until he stopped outside his office door, he opened it and we went inside where he gently set me down on the large sofa that I was hoping would be in here.

"Edward shut the door and turn off the lights please, it's time that we caught up with Mystery Man and Strawberry Girl."

It took him a moment to realise what I was saying but I could tell the moment he caught on, he gently closed the door and in the complete darkness of his new office we started again as Edward and Bella.

The End.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Thank you so much for indulging my newly discovered passion, I have loved working on this story. I have a new idea buzzing around so there will probably be another story but I'm going to make sure I have at least half written before I start posting it.

So with that I'll hopefully see you in a few months and who knows there should be little bits of these two popping us aswel in the meantime.

Alicia xx


	59. Deprivation future take part one

Deprivation future take part one

Three years later.

BPOV

"I'm ready, I know I'm ready in fact I'm really really sure, I'm certain it is what I want…. I think"

"For fuck's sake Bella who the hell are you trying to convince? We know you are ready, you are the one who needs to catch up" Rosie was in full flow as ever.

Rosie, Bree, Alice and I were sitting in our favourite tea shop after a mammoth shopping day. There seemed to be so many things to celebrate, to shop and get ready for at the moment, Emmett and Rosalie were getting married in just two months and I was to be her Maid of Honour. Alice was heavily pregnant and it was touch and go at the moment whether her and Jasper would be two or three guests for the wedding. Bree was about to move into the house she had bought with her girlfriend. That had been a huge surprise to us all, the girlfriend part not the moving in, but I'd never seen her so happy. It had taken awhile for Bree to tell us she fallen in love, we knew she was dating someone and as it seemed to get serious we pushed to meet 'him'. Finally she arranged a girl's night out and broke the news. We were just happy that she had found someone she loved, the guys were vey childish when we told them, lots of sniggering and jokes about scissor sisters, but a sharp reminder that everyone had been ok with Garrett from Rosie soon put a stop to that.

Me, on the other hand, well I was having the time of my life. Edward and I were happier than ever, I loved that man with every inch of my being and I made sure to let him know every day. We were very much one of those couples that everybody hated going out with because we were completely happy in our own company and when we were out dancing or out to dinner we very often disappeared into our own bubble, regardless of who we were with. Edward was just as bad as I was and even though Emmett and Jasper had seen him through the few weeks after Renee and her antics, they were still amazed he'd fallen so hard and completely given up his previous lifestyle, also that he'd been so happy to do so.

We had set up home in Edward's apartment, letting mine go as soon as we could and it had been a lot easier than I had first thought. I got a good price and had no doubts or second thoughts about selling it and Edward adapted pretty quickly to having me in his home all the time, I think the week I had there to convalesce had given him a taste of what it could be like. The only dark shadow on the horizon had been telling his parents. Edward tried to warn me what his Mother was like but assured me they would be fine with everything and to be fair, his mother was at first. She was polite and friendly the first few times we met up to have dinner with them in our first year together, but I honestly think she thought it was some sort of phase her son was going through and he would get bored of me and get a proper girlfriend who she did consider Daughter in Law material eventually. It was a huge surprise to Edward therefore when we went for dinner with them one night about 12 months ago and she had invited three single ladies from the country club to meet him. I mean, come on I was sitting there with him at the table, how rude? The dinner that followed was both uncomfortable and comical at the same time. As we sat at the table his mother, like any good hostess, directed the conversation where she wanted it to go and I couldn't help but secretly laugh as I watched the ladies try and engage Edward in conversation while all the time his hand was firmly clamped on my thigh. As they tried and tried to flirt with him the grip on my thigh got tighter and higher until he was sat cupping my lady bits. We never even made desert, Edward rushed us out of there with a supposed emergency at the new club.

Consequently we are at a bit of a standoff at the moment, she politely acknowledges me and invites me to dinner every now and then but every opportunity she gets she bends Edwards ear about all the nice girls she knows who are apparently more acceptable to his social circle and standing. I don't know what's funnier though, watching Edward try and fight off the cougars, widows and social climbers she deems to throw his way, or his anger as his Mother introduces single men to me hoping I will find someone else. I can see if she doesn't stop this soon that we won't be having anything to do with them in the future. I've kept my distance and let Edward deal with her but I'm getting to the point where I feel a show down is inevitable. Edward means everything to me and I'm not standing aside for anyone.

The club business is flourishing. Edward has opened two more clubs over the past three years, both of them with the new idea of having a ladies and a gentleman's side. This had led to Edward travelling quite a bit because the first club was in Indianapolis in Indiana and the next in Kansas City, Missouri. The new clubs have been well received and memberships are growing all the time. Each one more luxurious than the last and Edward was thinking of taking on an Operations manager who would look after the managers of the clubs so he could concentrate on his expansion plans. However, after being away so much to oversee the building of the last two clubs I think the novelty of being away overnight has finally worn off for him so I'm not sure what he intends to do. No amount of phone or cyber-sex seemed to make up for not being in bed beside me.

I on the other hand was having a nightmare time at work. I'd been promoted to VP of new business and the pressure was on to find more and more new authors, new material and to push the boundaries of our very conservative shareholders. Whilst I was happy to trawl through hundreds and hundreds of new manuscripts every week, I was becoming very disillusioned with the quality of what I was reading. In this huge on line world it was getting harder and harder to find original ideas within the boundaries of what the publishers would 'touch'. I needed them to realise that we should move into the world of erotica and LBGT but the shareholders were dead against it. They couldn't see they were missing out on the huge explosion of literature both on line, kindle and phone based, so I was beginning to think about moving on or quitting altogether.

Living with Edward and selling my place has allowed me to put a lot of savings aside because the apartment is paid for so we only have living expenses to cover. I don't need the job to cover the rent like I did before. We have talked about moving, buying a house or something but we are both happy here and don't really see the point of moving until we start a family.

I really was at a crossroads. Did I want to leave my job and join a competitor or start up on my own? Did I want to stay home and write that novel I was always dreaming about or was I ready to give everything up and just help Edward with his business? I knew enough about budgeting, sales, PR and staff management that I really could jump into the team if I wanted to.

Turning this over and over in mind had made me think about my future in more detail and that was the discussion I was having in the tea shop with the girls, I was ready to get married and make everything …..Formal, settled, set in stone….however you wanted to put it. I really wanted to make an honest man of him and I was ready to be Mrs Cullen. It was a subject that Edward and I had talked about several times and whilst we both knew that we would do it one day, we had never really discussed a time frame. I could just wait until he got round to proposing or as Bree suggested I could drop massive hints to him, things like leaving wedding magazine lying around and jewellery catalogues with rings circled that I liked. Rosie on the other hand was far more up front and told me to just ask him.

The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea of proposing to him so as his birthday was coming up I decided to try and make it one to remember. I didn't want to do anything too clichéd or predictable so I'd already ruled out a surprise party, a dinner party or just dinner out somewhere. I really wanted somewhere that was special to us and while I couldn't organise something in the park, where he had 'rescued me'. I could do something at his club though where we had our special afternoon together. It was where we had made love on the sofa in his office for the first time as Edward and Bella and that afternoon had been incredible. We had christened every available surface in his office before moving back out to the pool side. There we had christened the loungers, the changing rooms and the amazing chairs in the reception area.

I still look on that day as the true beginning of our relationship; it was just us, no half-truths, no pretending who we were and both of finally being honest about how we felt about each other. As the idea started to form I wondered how I could get the manager to let me have the club or his office for an afternoon so I could surprise Edward.

"Ok ladies am going to propose to him, so how should I do it? I mean I need it to be somewhere special, you know somewhere that means something to us" . I might as well get all the help I can so I threw it open to the group.

"Well I was going down on Emmett when he proposed" Rosalie enlightened us. "I was doing such a good job sucking the life out of him that he told me I had to marry him so I could do it every day"

"I have to admit Jasper and I were in bed also" Alice admitted "But for us it was an afterglow moment, Jasper just said he had found his place in this world and he wanted me forever".

After a round of 'Ahhhs' for Alice and 'TMI ' shouts for Rosalie we laughed and started a discussion on what I should do. After several suggestions about the park, Jasper's club and/or bars and our home it was left to Rosalie to say what I think everyone had been thinking but daren't actually verbalise.

"You know you could always surprise him and take him back to the dark room for some kinky sex, that way he'll be so sexed out he's bound to say yes"

This suggestion bought on another round of shouts as Rosalie was both congratulated for her idea, but slammed for the comment about kinky sex. So much so that the manager of the café actually asked us to keep down the noise. It was probably only the fact that we had been meeting there for years that saved us from being thrown out.

"Whilst it is a very good idea, how is it practical? I mean we'd be in a room full of strangers getting their rocks off, I'd have to find him and I would be naked so where would I keep his ring? Oh shit we need to go shopping I need to get him an engagement ring, not a diamond obviously but a nice signet ring perhaps, maybe it could a have a diamond in, I mean it should have a diamond if it's an engagement ring shouldn't it?"

I looked around at three stunned faces, they were just looking at me as if I'd spoken to them in fluent Japanese.

"What?" I asked, taking a sip of my tea to hide the blush creeping across my cheeks.

"I was only joking Bella, I never for one minute thought you would seriously consider it" Rosalie was looking at me with a strange expression on her face. "Bella have you missed the dark room?"

"Not really, I can honestly say I haven't really given the place a thought for a long time. I suppose for the first year I really associated the place with bad memories of Renee and the confusion of SG/MM, but now I see if for what it was, the place I first met Edward and the place where I realised that my lady bits did actually work"

"Well that calls for cake to celebrate" Alice called as she signalled for the waitress to bring over the cake trolley.

"Alice everything calls for cake to celebrate with you lately" Bree teased as the trolley stopped at our table.

"look I only have a few weeks before I have to start shifting this extra baby weight so let me enjoy it while I can" she said as she bit into the biggest fresh cream chocolate éclair I'd ever seen.

We carried on chatting about the baby, Rosalie's bachelorette party which was next weekend and Bree's new home that was now all sorted and just waiting on the final paperwork. Our lives were changing and we were all growing up.

Later that evening Edward and I were sitting cuddling on the couch and I couldn't get the thought of revisiting the Sensory suite out of my mind. I was trying to decide if it was somewhere we could go and I could propose to him. Was it tacky to be naked when I asked him to be my husband? On toady's chat it seemed to be the norm or my friends were all perverts! Perhaps we wouldn't be telling the story to our grandchildren though but it was where we'd met and it was part of our story.

"What's troubling you tonight Sweetheart, you seem miles away? " Edward asked as he moved on the couch so he was looking at my face.

"I've asked you three times about what's happening next week with Rosalie and you haven't answered me "

"I'm sorry Edward, I was miles away. I have a lot on my mind at the moment you know, work, Maid of Honour duties, bachelorette party, and baby shower for Alice and Jasper, new house for Bree, everything is changing and it just seems to be moving so fast. Does that make sense?" I asked him as I snuggled back into him.

His arms came around me as he said "Of course it does Bella, I agree things aren't usually as hectic as they are at the moment because these changes usually come one at time but our friends seem to being doing everything at once" he then kissed the top of my head and I felt a wave of love and comfort wash over me.

"Bella, you know work doesn't have to be a problem, don't you? You could give up and write that novel you've got bubbling in your head."

"I know but I've worked so hard to get where I am, I really don't want to give that up at the moment"

"I'll support you whatever you decide, all I'm saying is don't beat yourself up over something we can fix. I want you to be happy and just go with what feels right".

How did I get so lucky? I want to be his wife, he is already my everything so I did what only I can do, I took him to bed so I could show him just how much I loved him.

Over the next couple of days I couldn't move the thought of us going back into the dark room out of my head. I wasn't sure what it was, whether it was the thought of 'seeing ' MM again, the kinky sex or the proposal but something was rooted in my brain and I just couldn't shake it. As I sat in my office at lunchtime eating my sandwiches I found myself opening the website to DESIRE. It had changed over the years, the images on the site showed there had been some quite drastic additions, the club looked to be a little more hard core now, with a major emphasis on fetishes. They advertised all sorts of evening activities and detailed clubs that met there. They had obviously opened up the club to a broader audience than just the regular members. As I continued reading all the information I noticed a small paragraph that mentioned that any room in the club could be hired by the hour. While that sound quite sleazy it also gave me a wonderful idea, we could play in the room without having to worry about anyone else. Whilst I knew no one could see us, I mean it's called the dark room for a reason, I didn't want to worry about anyone else being present in the room this time, I wanted this to just be about us. I quickly placed a call and it was Sue that answered the phone.

"Desire, Sue speaking, how can I help?" she asked.

"Oh, hello. My name is Bella Swan and I was looking at your website and I wondering if I could book the dark room in the sensory suite for a couple of hours?"

As the discussion went on we managed to sort out a time when I knew Edward was free so I reserved the room for one night two weeks from tonight, that gave me enough time to sort out how to get Edward there, buy his ring, arrange a spa visit and decide on what I actually wanted to say to him.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Ok these two just won't stay quiet in my head so I'm just going with this at the moment.

Thanks to AG who got this this morning with no warning and turned it round straight away x


	60. Deprivation Futuretake part two

Deprivation chapter 60

Deprivation Future Take part two

EPOV

Something is troubling Bella. I can't quite put my finger on what it is because she has so much going on in her life at the moment that it could be anything. She is distracted, much scattier than normal and I'm forever reminding her to pick up her keys or phone and one morning this week to even put on her shoes. I'm sure she would have realised at some point she hadn't got them on …..

The Bachelorette weekend is over thankfully. They are all back safe and sound without us having to bail anyone out or visit the hospital. Jasper was seriously on edge as he worried about Alice and how she was coping with the antics of the weekend but he had to trust that she would be sensible; I think he was more concerned about her having to deal with the rest of the drunken party in her state. Whilst we trusted our ladies implicitly we were under no illusions as to what they were capable of getting up to when they were together mixed with copious amounts of alcohol. Sunday night Bella arrived home still slightly drunk, absolutely exhausted complete with a tattoo and a new piercing. She fell straight into the shower and then bed leaving me to sort out her luggage and wonder how the hell she had managed to get a tattoo and her eyebrow pierced in the space of two days. Don't get me wrong the tattoo was hot and in a place only I would be seeing, but still, what was she thinking?!

Emmett's Bachelor party is in a fortnight, the week after my birthday and we have a lot to live up to. I'm just hoping we are all up to it, Emmett, Jasper and I along with as many of his team mates that the coach will allow are all off to Vegas. We have planned a typical boys weekend of gambling, drinking, gambling, strip shows, eating, gambling, more drinking and the occasional show that doesn't involve naked women. Luckily it's off season so we should have quite the party. Most of the married players are using it as a reason to sneak away for the weekend and do everything their coach won't let them do during the Soccer season. I'm sure most of them are more worried about what the coach thinks than they are their own wives. At the last count there were 30 of us. The only notable absentee was Garrett because as expected Renee would not let him come with us. Yes, they were back together, but for how long was the subject of the biggest betting ring I'd even seen Emmett and his team mates take up. The pot sat at $45,000 dollars at the moment and there were still 20 guys with a live bet.

My birthday has been a little overshadowed this year with everything that is happening. Don't get me wrong I'm not complaining, it's just that the last two have been incredible as Bella has made such a big deal of my special day. My parents were never ones to pour out the love, the closest I got to any real attention was when I became old enough for them to throw a party for me at the country club so they could invite all their friends, and as I got older, all the people they knew with eligible daughters. I'm sure that's what my Mom would be planning this year as well if I would let her, but I'm not interested in finding anyone else. Bella is it for me and my Mom needs to accept that fact because one day I hope in the not too distant future she's going to be Mrs Edward Cullen. Bella on the other hand arranged things she knew I would love, the theatre and dinner last year and on my first birthday weekend together we spent it at home in our own bed. Now that was something I will never forget and would happily repeat given the chance.

So this year I'm just going to let it pass quietly. Bree has finally got her date to move into her new home with Julie-Anne and it just happens to be this weekend so I know Bella will want to help her. Alice is on bed rest for the week, the doctor wasn't impressed with her blood pressure after the Bachelorette weekend, so she and Jasper won't be about either.

It looks like this is going to be a quiet weekend for me, maybe I'll help with the move or I could even work, I need to start looking for the location of my new club. The last two have been out of state but I'm toying with the idea of another in Illinois, just not sure where yet.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

BPOV

Shit this is killing me. Keeping everything a secret from Edward about this weekend is hard enough without watching him mope because he thinks I'm too busy to arrange anything. How could he even think that I would put anything ahead of him is beyond me, but hey the male ego can be so fragile.

Everything is set, I have been to the spa and I am baby smooth everywhere. I've re-arranged the date with Sue so that we have the dark room from 7pm – 9pm exclusively on Saturday evening, not a night in the week, and I have a private dinner and a hotel suite booked nearby for afterwards. I'm hoping we can just move from the dark room to the hotel suite and carry on the night's activities. My only concern now is how to get Edward to DESIRE. I have toyed with the idea of sending him an invitation like he did with me for the private showing of his club, but I'm not sure that he wouldn't think it was just the club inviting him and not turn up. If I send an invite telling him it's me inviting him he'd know too far in advance what was happening. In my mind I want to invite him and then not see him until later that night in the dark room so I can build that anticipation and excitement for him.

The answer came to me whilst I was taking a shower. The top was loose of my strawberry shampoo and I am a stickler for that because this stuff is so expensive that I am always frightened of it spilling out. The only reason the top wasn't on properly was because someone (not me) hadn't put it back on properly. Now I hadn't smelt strawberry on his hair today when I kissed him goodbye a few minutes ago which meant he hadn't used it to wash his hair this morning as he sometimes does because he says he can smell me around him all day, so the only explanation was he had been sniffing the bottle.

Images of him masturbating in his morning shower while inhaling the strawberry smell sent shivers down my spine. We have never really spoken about MM and SG after that day in his club. We made the transition to Edward and Bella and never looked back. I still used all the same products so I didn't smell any different, in fact I still occasionally caught him sniffing my hair and skin when we were in bed.

My decision made, I knew SG needed to invite MM to the Sensory Room, there would be no confusion as to who was inviting him and I could do it by text so I wasn't around when he received it.

Saturday morning dawned and I was awake early. Bree was moving into her new home today, she and Julie-Anne had arranged movers to move all the big stuff and cleaners had been in yesterday to give the place a thorough going over. I had promised to make an appearance to help but they were both aware it was Edward's birthday and the plans I had made for us. I decided to wake my sleeping lover the best way I knew how so after a quick trip to the bathroom to relieve my bladder and clean my teeth I popped to two strong breath mints into my mouth and allowed the oil in them to coat the inside. Edward loved the tingle it caused on his dick when I had the mints in my mouth, he said it was like a cold heat that caused sensations he couldn't describe. I crept back into bed and lay still for a moment to make sure he was still actually asleep. We had been up late last night as he said he was determined to be inside me on the stroke of midnight. I think we finally fell asleep naked in each other's arms about 2.00am.

His deep breathing and occasional light snores assured me he was still asleep so I very gently slipped under the covers until I was level with his very impressive morning wood. I hated that I couldn't see what I was doing, which was quite funny seeing as what would be happening later tonight, but I knew his body so well I really didn't need to see him. He was lying on his side facing me, his legs spread slightly as if to counterbalance the top part of his body that was leaning towards where I usually lay. Starting at his knees I gently ran my fingers up along his thighs, stroking his defined muscles and feeling the tiny coarse hair he'd left there. I 'd talked him in to shaving off his pubic hair, it was something he'd agreed to try for me and had absolutely loved the sensations it gave him, he said that he could feel so much more of me and my clit certainly appreciated it when it rubbed against his smooth skin. He refused to have it waxed saying he didn't want anyone else to touch him, so he shaved regularly now to keep himself smooth.

My fingers slowly stroked all around his skin, and I could feel him responding to my touch, his hips were instinctively moving already, trying to find me ,and I could hear the moans as he tried to decide if he was dreaming or not. I knew I should wait to let him fall back to sleep but to be honest I wanted him awake so I wrapped my fingers around the base of his dick and angled him towards my mouth. I didn't waste any time, I moved my head down and took him as far back as I could, my lips meeting my fingers, holding him there at the back of my throat and sucked just like I had an ice lolly in my mouth. I could hear him groaning and I could feel his arms searching for me above the covers so I knew he was close to waking up. I slowly drew back, letting my tongue wrap round him until just his head was between my teeth. I poked my tongue in to the little slit on top knowing it would drive him crazy and as I continued to flick over the slit I was rewarded with the first drops of his precum, I collected it on my tongue and then swallowed him back down into my throat, dragging my teeth down him all the way. This was the move that woke him up, I heard him groan and then say "Shit Bella" as he grabbed the covers searching for me.

Realising what was happening he threw back the covers exposing me curled up on my side sucking on his cock like the contented girlfriend I was, "Happy Birthday to me" was all he said as he grabbed hold of my head with both hands and started to fuck my mouth. Now we had a system, I knew he loved to do this so if he got too rough I just needed to tap him and he would slow down, but today I was determined I was going to be in charge, so I pushed him over onto his back and climbed over him to kneel between his open legs.

"Happy Birthday Sweetheart" I said as I leant forward and took him in my mouth again, this time wasting no time as I plunged down dragging my teeth and coming back up wrapping my tongue around him. I started to hum happy birthday , the vibrations sending shivers straight up his spine. He was getting more and more vocal and I loved hearing him lose control. It was something I asked of him, not to be quiet because I needed to hear what effect I was having, so with his hands gripping my head and his knees raised up I gently slipped a finger into his ass as I swallowed around him. He came almost instantly, his thick seed erupting down my throat as I felt him throbbing. His hands released my hair whilst I gently removed my finger and cleaned him up before kissing my way up his chest to his lips. Thankfully he wasn't squeamish about kissing me after he'd come in my mouth so I said good morning and happy birthday all over again.

"Wow that was one hell of a wakeup call sweetheart. Shame it's not my birthday everyday because I could seriously get used to that" he joked as he kissed my forehead and pulled the covers back over us.

"I really don't think we should get up today, in fact I think it should be mandatory that we spend my birthday in bed every year." He said as he pulled me to tighter to him.

"Sorry sweetheart I have a busy day so let's get going. I need to get to Bree's and I have some errands to run as well as needing to go to Rosalie's to help with some wedding stuff and checking that Alice is ok. I know it's your day sweetheart but can we celebrate later when I get home?"

The look of rejection on his face almost bought me to my knees, I came so close to telling him about my surprise that I had to put my hand over my mouth and pretend to yawn.

I got up and after a quick shower I went in to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for us. I made Edward his favourite, homemade waffles, crispy bacon and syrup served with fresh fruit and his special coffee blend he had made up especially for him. I loaded it all on a tray along with his card and present and went back into the bedroom where he was still in bed.

"Here we are special birthday treatment for my special man" I said as I placed the tray on his lap. He was trying so hard not to sulk and I had to bite my lip to stop myself from laughing. I kept everything light and happy as he opened his card and the new watch I'd bought him. The huge smile on his face said it all as he opened his present, a Breitling Navitimer. He'd been talking about treating himself to it for the last couple of months and I wasn't sure if it was his way of dropping hints for his birthday because he usually just bought himself anything that caught his eye. I have to say it was expensive but the look he gave me made it worth every dollar.

We chatted as we ate and several times he tried to talk me into getting back into bed with him, but I knew he'd thank me later for building the anticipation for tonight. So before I caved and jumped him I kissed him goodbye and left him in bed. I collected the case I'd packed the day before and hidden in the spare room, it had everything we both needed for a night out and an overnight stay including some new toys for when we got to the hotel. I flagged down a cab and settled in for the long drive across the city to the hotel. It was just around the corner from DESIRE so I had decided to spend the day there.

When I arrived I checked in and the suite was just as I ordered, so I spent half an hour hanging up our clothes and un-wrapping the toys. We had been talking about trying anal sex and I'd decided tonight was the night. I'd been preparing myself after doing some research and as long as we were gentle and took it slowly I was sure we would be ok. As ever Rosalie had been the fountain of all knowledge, supplying me with web addresses to watch 'educational videos' (aka posh porn) and buying me her favourite lube and butt plug starter pack.

As soon as everything was ready I took out my phone and sent the text I'd been planning for days.

 _ **Well hello there Mystery Man, long time no see. How about we meet up tonight and relive some old memories or even make some new ones? See you in the Sensory suite at 7pm. Your Strawberry Girl xx**_


	61. Deprivation Futuretake part three

Deprivation future take part three

EPOV

Well fuck! What am I going to do today? I can't really believe she has gone out and left me all alone. I mean it's my birthday today that should mean sex, more awesome blow jobs, attention and general spoiling of me. To be fair it's not like Bella has ignored my birthday, I've got this gorgeous watch I've been eyeing up for months and I did get breakfast in bed and a blowjob to wake up to but still…..

I know! I could call my mother. No on second thoughts that's a really bad idea. I need to stay away from her today of all days, she'll no doubt have some elaborate plan to introduce me to Miss USA or something stupid. I need to sit her down and have a long chat with her about Bella as her actions are pretty insulting to both of us and I know Bella is expecting me to deal with her so she doesn't have to step in. I think my time could be running out on that if I don't do it soon.

To be honest as I lay in bed with the remnants of my breakfast still on the tray at the side of me I can't help but stretch out and luxuriate. I feel so relaxed; my Bella did such a good job of waking me up that I won't need to sort myself out this morning. Don't get me wrong, I don't need to very often since Bella and I became a couple, just every now and again. I love to have a good tug in my morning shower using her shampoo to lubricate me. I love the silkiness of it, the feel on my dick is amazing and I get to keep her scent around me all day as a bonus.

After a leisurely shower I called Jasper and Emmett to see what they were doing today. Jasper it turns out is babysitting Alice because her blood pressure just isn't settling and if she doesn't calm down soon the doctor has warned her he will take her into hospital until the baby is born.

When I finally got hold of Emmett he informs me that he is doing wedding shit today. He and Rosalie still haven't sorted a dinner menu they can agree on, so today they are going to do a tasting with the caterer; he was so excited, as far as he was concerned he was going to be able to eat 'posh' food all day without anyone telling him to stop or that he couldn't have it. I pitied the poor caterer and hoped they knew what they were getting themselves into, Emmett could eat his own bodyweight in food when he was in the right frame of mind.

It wasn't until I cut the call that I realised neither of them would be about to actually see Bella, so unless she was spending the day at Bree's, Bella hadn't been entirely truthful where she was going today. I dialled Bree to see if she had heard from Bella, but she didn't answer. Now I was starting to get worried, Bella had been scattier then ever all week, she was distracted and forgetful. Just as I was beginning to worry about what was going on my phone chimed with a text, I had to read it two or three times before I actually believed what I was seeing.

 _ **Well hello there Mystery Man, long time no see. How about we meet up tonight and relive some old memories or even make some new ones? See you in the Sensory suite at 7pm. Your Strawberry Girl xx**_

I sat staring at the text, not really sure what to reply as I hadn't thought about the club or the dark room in such a long time. I'd left all that behind me when I knew Bella loved me just as much as I loved her. Not once had I been tempted to go back while we were apart or at any point afterwards but this…. well this was different because Bella was actually inviting me to meet her there. My physical reaction to the text was instant; my dick was solid and pressing against the buttons of my 501's. I tried to adjust it as I thought about my answer to her. No brainer really the answer was obvious

 _ **Well this is a surprise Strawberry Girl, I thought you had forgotten all about me. I'd love to meet you tonight, I'll be the naked one in the Sensory Room .Do you think you'll still be able to recognise me? MM Xx**_

I sat waiting for a reply but nothing came, Bella was obviously playing this really cool, I couldn't believe she wanted to go back to the club. As I sat looking at my phone my mind started to play tricks on me,

Did she want to go to the club because I wasn't enough for her?

Did she want to start seeing someone else?

Did she want to introduce someone else into our relationship and this was her way of telling me?

I shook my head to clear away the thoughts because what was I thinking? Bella loved me I had no doubt about that, she was my everything and I was hers, we didn't want or need anyone else. Perhaps my watch wasn't my only present after all…lucky me.

It was coming up to noon so I decided that I would just wait to meet Bella later, I had a few hours to kill so needed to get organised. I needed to avoid my Mother because today was one of the very rare times she was likely to show up at my apartment so the most important thing was to go out. I needed some fresh air so first things first, some exercise. I changed into my gear and sneakers and left for a good run around the park. Whilst I was running with the music pounding in my head I had chance to think about the surprise I was trying to put together for Bella. I had an engagement ring hidden in the office safe at my second club, which I used as my main base apart from home. I was just trying to figure out a way to ask her that was special and unforgettable. I really liked the idea of a huge gesture because believe me this was the first and last time I was ever going to do this. I was thinking Paris at Christmas or maybe London at New Year or even the Caribbean, a private island in the summer. No matter how elaborate the plan every time I decided on something Emmett would tell me one of his team mates had already done it which ruined it for me because it wasn't special enough. Both Emmett and Jasper confessed they proposed without a ring and in the spur of the moment, so they were no help at all.

The ring had been another big decision that had taken me ages to sort out. I was torn between a family piece and a classic diamond from Tiffany's. As much as I would have loved Bella to wear my Grandmothers ring, getting it from the family safe would have caused so much hassle. I also knew I could not trust my parents to keep the secret because once my Mother realised I really was serious about marrying Bella she would certainly up the anti and there would be a steady stream of women thrown in my path at every opportunity.

Instead I settled on an Emerald Cut one carat diamond. It was beautiful and everything about it just screamed Bella. I knew she would love it, it wasn't too flashy or showy but she would be able to wear it everyday and everyone would know she was mine. Shit I was getting so possessive; I really did want to shout out from the roof tops that she belonged to me.

The run cleared my head but didn't help me decided on how or when I should propose but I figured inspiration would eventually hit me. After another quick shower, I decided to go and see if Bree and Julie-Ann needed any help because if everyone was busy today, they would have to do everything on their own.

I finally found their new house and as I made my way across the drive, dodging the boxes that were stacked everywhere I knew I'd been right, they needed an extra pair of hands.

"Hi is anyone about?" I shouted not wanting to walk into anyone christening new rooms or surfaces.

"We are back here Edward"

I walked towards the laughing and the voices I could hear and rounded the corner to find Bree and Julie- Ann fighting with a huge mattress they were trying to get onto a bed base.

"Hey let me help" I said as I grabbed one end and helped them guide it to where it belonged.

"Thank you Edward, great timing. The delivery men just left it in the garden when we didn't answer the door straight away. It's taken us an hour just to get it into the bedroom" Bree said as she flopped onto the plastic covered mattress.

"Well ladies, it's your lucky day as I have a couple of hours to spare so put me to work".

When I finally left sometime late afternoon I was glad I'd been able to help and spend time with them. They were very much in love, happy to be setting down roots and looking forward to starting a family in the future. They had no reservations about being in a same sex relationship, they were just in love and it made me realise just how much I was ready to be married and maybe even be a Daddy one day. We had never really talked in depth about kids, just skirted around the subject, both of us saying that we would discuss it nearer the time.

When I got back home I took another shower because I was hot and sweaty after all that unpacking and shaved. I was getting used to having to shave in more places than just my face. Whilst Bella loved me to have stubble on my chin, she loved me smooth all around my dick even more. It was difficult the first time I went to the gym, I expected everyone to comment, but no one said anything and I had a sneaky look around, it surprised me just how many of the guys were shaved smooth down there. After rubbing in the special moisturiser Bella had suggested I use, I slipped on a pair of slate grey dress pants, no boxers as I figured I wouldn't be needing them, a matching dress shirt and a black neck tie. I slipped on black socks and dress shoes and after picking up my keys, wallet and phone I was ready to go.

I jumped in the car and started to drive towards my Strawberry Girl. I had really missed her today, it was so weird, we had been apart just a few hours but I felt like part of me was missing. We were apart longer on a normal working day but today, today felt different. Maybe I was just moving on to the next part of my life, whatever it was I was ready for it and looking forward to it immensely.

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BPOV

I was feeling just a tiny bit guilty. I had had a pretty lazy day after leaving Edward in bed this morning. I did pop in to check on Alice, she was doing ok and has finally realised she needs to slow down, for a few weeks at least. I spoke to Rosalie as they were on their way to the caterers; she and Emmett were fighting over beef or fish already, which probably meant they would end up with chicken. I don't know why Emmett bothered, he would never get the last word, and Rosalie always won. Next I called over to take the girls coffee and doughnuts at their new home so they could start moving boxes while they waited for the removal men to show.

Once I knew everyone was ok I settled into the hotel suite and ordered a massage and a was very decadent to actually have this time to myself but I needed to get ready for tonight. I had Edward's ring with me. A plain platinum band with a diamond embedded in it which he could wear now and then if he wanted to he could also use as his wedding band.

Looking at the ring in the distinctive blue box I realised I couldn't wait to be Mrs Edward Cullen.

The hotel was only ashort walk to DESIRE so at 6.15pm I made my way across the street and in to the reception area. The inside had had a major refurbishment since my last visit and I didn't recognise anything. The one thing I was glad to see missing was Renee, I knew from Emmett she no longer worked here so I could relax. Sue came out to meet me at the reception desk and escorted me upstairs; she went over all the official bits and pieces and I signed a few forms before she got ready to leave me. I asked her to bring Edward straight up and not to let him know that we had an exclusive booking. She agreed and wished me a good evening as she walked away. I know I hadn't been here for a few years but she was very business-like and formal, I wasn't quite sure whether I appreciated that or whether I was expecting her to be friendlier.

The changing room had been totally refurbished and I was a little upset that everything felt so different. I suppose I wanted everything to have been the same, but in reality I knew things had to change and move forward. I stripped off and slipped his ring over my thumb. It was a little bit big but would stay there until I moved it over to his finger. I opened the door, purposely leaving the light on behind me so I could take a quick peek into the dark room. The room looked the same really, the rope was still along the back wall, the wall bench had new covering on it and the flooring had been upgraded so it would be more comfortable to kneel or lie on. The room was already empty so as I checked the time and saw that it was 6.50pm I turned off the light and took a seat in the centre of the bench to wait.

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EPOV

As soon as I walked into the reception area I felt ready for anything. Whatever Bella had planned I was up for.

"Edward how wonderful to see you again, it's been too long" Sue exclaimed as she leaned into kiss me. I quickly moved my face to the side and her lips landed on my cheek instead of my lips.

"If you would like to follow me I'll take you up to the Sensory Suite"

"Sue I'm sure I could still find my way, you must be busy tonight" I tried to discourage her but she wasn't having it so I let her take my arm and walk me up the stairs.

"Well here you are, nothing has changed in here, the rules remain the same, I'm sure you haven't forgotten them. Now enjoy yourself and when you've finished in here come and see me in the bar so we can discuss you renewing your membership because we have missed having you around."

She tried to kiss me again but I dodged that by walking towards the changing room door. I never even looked back, not wanting to show her any kind of encouragement. Once inside the changing room I was surprised to see how well it had been refurbished. Of course it was nowhere near the luxury of my new places, but it was good, I had to give them that. I stripped off carefully hanging my clothes up but leaving my new watch on. I was hard already because as soon as I had walked away from Sue it was as though my dick knew Bella was nearby. Checking the huge clock still on the wall, I saw it was exactly 7.00pm so I took a deep breath and made my way to the inner door. Whatever was waiting for me on the other side was something that Bella had planned and she would have done that with me in mind so I knew it would be amazing.

Walking into the room my first thought was that I was glad it wasn't too busy, I really didn't want to step over people to get to her. My second thought was to take a huge breath in so I could see if her scent was the same in here as I remembered. It was, I smelt her immediately, she was here and she smelled exactly the same as she had the first time. I took a moment to get used to the blackness and to just soak up the room before I reached for the rope on the back wall. I remembered just in time that talking wasn't allowed in the room, moaning was ok, but no communication.

I followed the rope and her scent until I knew she was within touching distance but I wasn't quite sure what to do. For probably the first time in my adult life I was actually feeling shy, but this was Bella's show so she could take the lead. I sat down next to her and made sure I was close enough that my thigh was actually touching hers. I heard her breathe out, it sounded maybe in relief or maybe just like me she'd missed me today, either way I knew we were both happier now we were in each other's company.

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BPOV

Edward's here. I know I'm expecting him to be but I also know I would recognise him anywhere, in darkness or light. Whilst I sit waiting for him to make his way to me, it strikes me that while I had put a lot of thought in to the day and the rest of the evening I hadn't really put any thought into how I was going to propose or what we were actually going to do once we were in here. The no talking rule was in place but seeing as we had the room exclusively I didn't see that as being important. I knew I needed to hear him call me Strawberry Girl again. The last time had been in the bar on that fateful evening and I didn't want that to be the last time he thought of me as her.

What the hell, I'm nervous, shit, Bella get a grip this is just Edward…..

"Well hello there Mystery Man, I'd say that it was good to see you again, but that is not quite true seeing as I can't see you, so let me say it's good to …feel you again" I know it was corny but as I drew my fingertips up his thigh I could feel the goose bumps rising under my fingertips.

I let my fingertips continue as he didn't offer any response, so they continued up his thigh and I dipped them into the crease between the top of his leg and his groin. He had shaved for me; I could feel the smooth freshly moisturised skin,

"Oh that's new, I love a freshly shaved man especially when he shaves all over" I told him as I let my fingertips just gently stroke all around his skin, I kept brushing against his shaft, he was ram rod straight but I wasn't ready to touch him yet, we had two hours and I wanted to tease him for a while yet.

"You know it's so much nicer to deep throat your man when there is no pubic hair to worry about, I love the feeling of my lips brushing the skin as his dick disappears into my throat".

The groan that came from him made my lady bits twitch and my juices were already starting to coat my inner thighs. He was so turned on and I had hardly touched him.

I got up and stood in front of him, pushing myself between his legs. I forced his legs open as far as I could so I could get really close and placed my hands on his shoulders, his automatically coming up to rest on my waist. I wanted him to find the butt plug I had in, but we had plenty of time I wasn't in any hurry. If I was honest I was happy wearing it, once I got over the initial sensation I quite liked the full feeling.

I didn't know what I wanted to do first, I 'd already given him a blowjob this morning so I didn't want to do that again so I decided he could do as he was told and that it was my turn to be spoilt. I know it is his birthday but well, he'll get almost as much pleasure as I will from what I was about to suggest.

"So is my Mystery Man up to playing a little game tonight? I think seeing as it is just the two of us we can get away with a little talking don't you? But how about silence from you for the time being? You can moan as much as you like but for now I think no talking"

"So I want you down on your knees, and I want you to make sure I'm wet enough to take you" I stepped back to give him space to kneel and I felt him slide off the bench. I heard rather than saw his knees hit the comfortable flooring and I knew from experience he was in the right position to give my lady bits some serious attention. I put my hands back on his shoulders and lifted one leg to rest it on the bench behind him, "Well Mystery Man I'm open for you, let's see what you can do" I said as I guided the back of his head towards me.

As soon as his nose came into contact with my pussy lips I felt my insides clench, this was going to be very messy. I knew I was going to be coming several times this evening. I let my head drop back and just enjoyed the amazing sensation as Edward used his nose and tongue to just trace all over my outer lips and mound. His hands had come to rest on the outside of my thighs and he was steadily lapping away.

"Faster Mystery Man, I need you to fuck me with your tongue" I ordered as I grabbed his hair and pulled his face into me.

He was up for the challenge and went into action instantly, his tongue went rigid and he started working in and out of me, I could hear my juices sloshing about as he bought me to a shattering orgasm.

"Oh shit" was about as all I could manage

It took me a while to come down and Edward was patient as he supported my weight and kept slowly licking all round my pussy cleaning me up.

"Wow Mystery Man I had forgotten just how you could affect me that was amazing. What should I do to reward you?" I asked standing back in front of him again. At this point he still had not spoken and in a way I was glad, it kept an air of suspense that wouldn't have been there if we were talking to each other.

"I know what? I think I will ride you and let you suck my nipples while I get myself off. Get back onto the bench and sit down with your legs together because I'm going to straddle you "He groaned again and I knew he was enjoying this, before I went to sit on him I wrapped my hand around his dick to see how hard he was.

"Fuck" was all he said as I squeezed him in my hand. I couldn't help but take his balls in my other hand. They were hot and very heavy, he was close already and I hadn't really touched him yet.

"Well Mystery Man you really are hot and throbbing aren't you? I can feel the heat coming off you and your poor dick is weeping, feel this" I said as I swiped my thumb over his drenched head. The precum coated my thumb and I bought it up to my mouth to lick it off.

"Oh Mystery Man that takes me back to our first meeting, I recognise that taste, I gave you an incredible blowjob that night didn't I?"

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" was the reply and I knew he was doing his best not to come. I could be very cruel here, several hard tugs on his shaft now and he would erupt or I could keep him bubbling. Deciding on the latter I moved to straddle him.

"Ok Mystery Man I'm going to straddle you, hold your dick straight up for me so I can lower myself onto it" he groaned again, it seemed that my Edward liked to be a little submissive now and again. I'd remember that for another time, maybe he would like to be tied up or even gagged and blind-folded; something to think about.

The thought of that took me to another level and I was in his lap and embedded on him before he could even move his hand, as he tried to move it out of the way he brushed against my ass cheeks and knocked the plug in my ass. The sensation was incredible, I was so full now I had Edward inside me as well so when he moved the plug we both felt it.

"What the fuck is that Bella?" he said as he touched the rounded end of the plug that was nestling between my ass cheeks.

"Now Mystery Man no talking and the name is Strawberry Girl, not Bella. If you really need to know, your Strawberry Girl has a butt plug in because she has been training her ass ready for you to fuck it later".

Well that proved just too much for him. I had pushed him over the edge because he grabbed my waist and took charge, bouncing me up and down on his dick while holding one of my nipples between his teeth. The sensation was incredible as the friction caused by rubbing against the butt plug was cancelled out by the sheer pain of his teeth biting my nipple. I wanted to cry out that he was hurting me, but he wasn't really, the sensations all mashed together and it just made me climb higher and higher.

"I can't last much longer, fuck, come you fucking tease, just fucking come" spilled out of his mouth, the relief at him letting go of my nipple was quickly lost as he grabbed the butt plug and started to tug on it. As soon as it moved and he pushed it back in I came with a scream I was sure the whole club heard.

When he felt me clamp down on him, he leant forward and sank his teeth into my shoulder, he held onto me as he thrust up and came over and over. It seemed to go on for ages, I swear I felt every single time he emptied some more of his sperm into me.

"Fuck woman what are you doing to me?" he said as he rested his head on my shoulder.

We sat cuddling for a while, neither of us really saying much, we just held each other and he stayed inside me, never really going soft. I was aware of the time restraint we had, not having my watch or phone nearby I was unsure how long we had left in this private dark haven.

"We have the room for two hours sweetheart, but any idea what time it is?" I asked as I felt for his wrist, he was wearing his birthday gift.

"It's 8.00pm so we have an hour left" he said as he picked me up from his lap and turned me over so I was lying across him.

Giggling I asked him the obvious question, "Are you going to spank me?"

"Don't give me ideas but I quite like the idea of trying that. We obviously need to talk about some things to do with our sex life, don't we?" he said as he touched the end of the butt plug again.

"I can't believe you have this in, what are you planning Bella?" he asked.

"Well I have booked us dinner and a hotel suite for tonight, I thought we could go and relax and have a drink over dinner. When we are ready I have Lubricant and other butt plugs already in the room. You could try wearing one or we could just have a go at you fucking my ass, what do you think?" I asked feeling movement underneath me as his dick pushed against my stomach.

"What did I ever do to deserve you Bella? I love you so much sweetheart" he said as he sat me back up and on his lap. He adjusted me several times until he was comfortable enough with me sitting on his hard on.

"How much do you love me? I asked him

"That's a strange question Bella. I love you with all my heart and soul, in fact you're it for me. I've told you that before. You don't doubt me, do you?" He was stroking his hand up and down my back and he pulled me against him to cuddle me. It was now or never, I needed to get the question out now.

"I don't doubt it at all Edward. I know you love me just as much as I love you. My question is, do you love me enough to marry me and make me Mrs Cullen?" I sat and waited for him to digest the question.

"Bella what are you asking me?" he said, his hand suddenly very still against my back.

"I'm asking you to marry me Edward, will you be my husband?"

The silence was deafening as I waited for his answer. The seconds ticked by and as he didn't speak I started to panic.

"I don't fucking believe it Bella. I've had your ring for weeks. Weeks I've had it and I've been driving myself mad trying to decide how to propose and make it special and….and you just up and propose to me instead."

"Edward I have your ring here now, so how about an answer please? I'll ask again. Edward will you marry me please?"

"Too fucking right I will darling. Yes ,yes, yes."

I slipped the ring off my thumb and onto his finger.

"I know you can't see it yet, but it is gorgeous even if I do say so myself. Can I also say that seeing as I proposed not you I think you should take my name and become Mr Swan."

Before I could say anything else he mumbled something about 'shutting me the fuck up' and he crashed his lips into mine.

It looks like we are getting married.

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So these two seem to be moving forward with their lives. Shall I leave it here or do you want another chapter covering Edward finally getting a ring on her finger ? Let me know.

My thanks to AG who works tirelessly with my ramblings. I couldn't do this without you and to Ladyletters always has an idea when I need one.

Edlovesme I hope you enjoy this, you get to just read it .


	62. Deprivation Futuretake part four

Disclaimer the author does not own any publically recognizable characters herein. No copyright infringement is intended

Deprivation Future take 4 Chapter 62

EPOV( a week after the Proposal)

What a fucking week, I can't believe I'm engaged. I can't believe Bella asked me. I can't believe I've finally had anal sex properly and I can't believe I'm going to be married soon.

The shock of Bella proposing was still all I could think about, well most of the time. I will admit to day dreaming about what happened in the hotel after we left DESIRE as well. Both experiences were totally unexpected, Bella had not only managed to beat me to proposing but she also blew me away with getting herself ready to offer her ass to me.

I had had anal sex before, but it happened by accident really. I was still in college and totally into my newly discovered kink of anonymous sex. I'd picked up this hot older woman in a bar one night while I was out with Emmett, she was very confident and had no problem with me bending her over the hood of a car in a dark parking lot. The condom was well lubricated with her juices, she was very demanding and I was trying to hurry so we didn't get caught, so… I was more than a little shocked when I slipped into entrance 2 instead of entrance 1. She on the other hand was obviously quite used to entrance 2 having quite a bit of attention as I slipped right in without any trouble. So there I was, totally up for taking advantage of my good fortune, thrusting into her without a care in the world. As it was all new for me I came quite quickly, too quickly, unfortunately well before she was ready and the last thing I remember as she adjusted her dress and walked away was her muttering something about pretty boys with no staying power! It put me off sex for at least a month and I have never really explored entrance 2 since.

Finding that plug in Bella's ass when we were in the dark room was just incredible. We had talked about it and even looked at buying plugs online, but we had never actually gone ahead and bought anything, or so I thought. My Bella was so incredible, we had an amazing time in the Sensory Suite and it was 1000 times better than when we met in there, knowing who she was and that we wouldn't be interrupted was just an experience I will never forget. After we left we went back to the hotel suite she had reserved and had a light dinner courtesy of room service as neither of us wanted to sit in a formal restaurant. As soon as dinner was delivered we were all over each other, I made sure she came several times so she was totally relaxed and chilled out before I even went anywhere near her ass. We cheated really for the first time because I left the plug in as long as possible and sank in to her as soon as I removed it. It made it easier for both of us, she was open from having the plug in for several hours and I was able to sink into her easily knowing there was no pain or discomfort for Bella as she was very well lubricated and relaxed.

In the end we stayed awake most of the night, exploring each other all over again, loving and talking. I couldn't help but keep touching the titanium and diamond ring she had placed on my finger, it was exquisite. I loved that I could also use it as my wedding band. The only time I was ever taking it off was when I placed it with the priest for him to bless on my wedding day then it was going straight back on.

I still need to give Bella her ring that I have waiting in my office safe. My first instinct had been to go and get it the next morning as my club wasn't far from the hotel but I didn't want to spoil her planning. This was her time and I could slide that ring on her finger shortly when we had an engagement party in front of all our friends and family. The thought of that made me shudder and reminded me where I was actually driving to right now. It was time to tell my mother I was getting married. I'd been putting it off because I had a pretty good idea what her reaction would be even though I was still hoping for something different. I knew she would be 'mellow 'today due to her 'ladies that lunch event' she was hosting and I was hoping I could swoop in tell her and leave without any blood being shed.

As I pulled up at the house, I'd timed it perfectly, the ladies were all leaving and after dodging more than a few gropes and ass grabs I made it safely into the house.

"Good afternoon Jones" I said to the Butler my Mother had employed years ago to make sure I was brought up with a regular male presence given that my father was always off somewhere on business. He was a good man really and I'd spent many a happy hour in his company as a child.

"Good afternoon Edward Sir. What a lovely surprise. How are you?" he said as he took my coat.

"I'm wonderful, but more importantly how is my Mother? I need her in a good mood"

"She is well lubricated so you should be ok. It was a committee meeting today of one of the charities she is on the board of, if I'm not mistaken I think it was under privileged children and you know how much she really hates anything to do with charity. I've been serving her gin and tonic since about eleven o'clock this morning and we have been pretending it's just tonic water."

We laughed as I pushed my shoulders back, took a deep breath and entered her private sitting room. She was sitting with her head back and her eyes were closed, the look on her face told me she was processing everything that had happened at the meeting and she was filing it away for later. My mother was ruthless and any snippets she had overheard today would by now have been processed and stored ready for use when needed.

"Good afternoon Mother, how are you?"

She raised her head to look at who was talking to her which was quite sad as I was her only child.

"Edward darling! What brings you here in the middle of the day? Do you have some good news for me?"

"Actually Mother I do, I've come to let you know I'm getting married"

"Married! You! Who on earth to?" was her response

"Well Mother seeing as I have been in love with and living with Bella now for three years, I'd say she is a pretty strong candidate wouldn't you?" I had to stay calm, I knew she wasn't going to embrace this like a normal Mother would. No way was she going to be happy for me because she hadn't picked my bride out of a line up of "suitable" candidates.

"Oh Edward no! She isn't marriage material. How many times do I have to tell you, she is fine to play with for now, you could even keep her on as a mistress if you had to, but marriage no, I will not allow it."

"Mother I'm not asking for your permission. I'm here out of courtesy to let you know and I had hoped you might be happy for me. I will give you the date when we have finally decided when and where".

Choosing to totally ignore my last comment she said "Edward I have a dinner arranged that you need to attend in the next couple of weeks. I have a Senator, a Governor, their wives and daughters as well as a couple of minor English royals coming, apparently they are proper princesses so you need to be here. Unfortunately there isn't room for your friend but I'm sure you can bring her to dinner another night when it's not so important. I'll send you the date and the dress code; it will probably be full dinner suit.

"Mother how dare you! I can tell you now I won't be here. Whatever date and time it is I will be busy and the sooner you realise I love Bella and she is going to be my wife then the sooner we can all get on with our lives"

Mother finally looked at me, the hatred on her face would have been quite scary to someone who did not know her and I was again glad I hadn't subjected Bella to this. She had wanted to come with me so we could tell her together but I managed to persuade her it really wasn't necessary.

"You can't really be serious about the girl because you haven't asked me for your Grandmother's jewellery" she was gloating now, thinking she had me.

"I gave it a lot of thought Mother and I decided I didn't want her to wear anything you had worn. I want her to have something which is just hers and she can pass onto our children. She can have my Grandmother's jewels when you are long gone" I know it was a low blow but I knew how to deal with her, show any weakness and she would never let go.

"Her ring is beautiful and exactly what I imagined my future wife wearing" I told her as I turned to leave.

"If you marry her I will cut off your trust fund."

"Mother you have threatened that at least twice a year for the past twenty years. Do you really think I haven't checked and rechecked the small print of the trust documents? I'm an adult now and you have no control over the fund and haven't had since I was 25. Plus I am happy to inform you that even without that I am a very wealthy man. My clubs make an awful lot of money so even if you could cut off my trust fund, which you can't, it wouldn't matter"

"Ahh, so that explains what Isabella wants you for then. I'll give the woman that, she has landed herself a rich man. Does she know just how much you are worth?"

This woman was unbelievable, she had married my dad because her father told she had to, they had never really loved one another. My father, who was a good man and was over the moon when I talked to him earlier today to tell him about me and Bella worked constantly so he wasn't at home, he just showed up when he was summoned for entertaining duties. I wouldn't be surprised to find he had another family somewhere where he was happy. I'm sure the reason I didn't have any siblings was because as soon as I was conceived my mother moved into her own suite of rooms and stayed there.

"Listen to me Mother for the final time. I came to tell you in person about Bella and I getting married today out of some mis-guided loyalty , I love Bella and she loves me and I had hoped you would be happy for us. I do not want you dis-respecting my fiancée, my future wife, your future daughter in law so this has to stop if you want any part in our lives going forward. I am getting married to Bella and it won't be a long engagement. I will let you know when and where but I swear if I get one whiff that you are trying to cause trouble, I will whisk Bella off to Vegas and marry her before you even know I've left the state."

With that speech out of the way I turned and left the room and made my way back to the entrance hall where Jones was waiting for me. I was trying to calm myself down and as he helped me with my coat he spoke quietly

"Congratulations on your engagement sir, Miss Bella is a wonderful woman. I will keep my ears and eyes peeled and if I sense anything untoward is happening I will let you know" he said as he patted my back.

As I drove away from the house I tried to put my mother out of my mind. Honestly the meeting had gone pretty much as I had expected so it would so I wasn't surprised at her attitude, which is why I'd convinced Bella not to come with me. She didn't need to see that. I had hoped my Mother would see how blissfully happy I am and just be pleased for me but to be honest I was of the opinion she didn't know how to be happy, never mind recognise it on someone else.

The thing is though I still need to get my ring on her finger. I need the world to know she is mine, all mine which is possessive I know but I can't help myself where Bella is concerned. Deciding on a course of action I altered my direction of travel and made my way to the club near DESIRE.

Walking into my office I couldn't help but smile. I loved this room. We had christened the couch, my desk, the wall, the floor and my private shower over the past couple of years and if I'm honest I think Bella loves this office just as much as I do.

It was whilst I was thinking about our last session in here that the perfect idea came to me. Bella didn't need grand romantic gestures in some far flung place, she would be happy with me just taking the ring home with me and slipping it on her finger, but I wanted to do something just a little bit more memorable. Looking at my watch it was late afternoon, Bella would be getting ready to leave her office for the day and I wondered if I could catch her before she left so I quickly dialled her office number

"Isabella Swan" she answered

"Well hello gorgeous, I'm glad I caught you, do you have any plans tonight?" I asked her

"Well that depends if I can escape the clutches of my insanely possessive fiancé, what do you have in mind?"

"Well how about you jump in a cab and come meet me at the club downtown?"

"Edward I can't come down there now, the club is open. Had you forgotten you have a no ladies policy? "

"Oh don't worry Sweetheart I know the owner. I can smuggle you in the back door, no one will even know you're here." I was trying so hard not to giggle because I knew I was doing the right thing.

"I'll be there in about 45 minutes so be waiting by the back door for me sweetie. I love you, see you soon" she said as she blew kisses into the phone.

I quickly started to organise what I needed. I got the ring out of the safe and placed it on my desk which I had cleared of all the paperwork and my laptop. I went through to the bar and collected two glasses and a bottle of champagne in an ice bucket. It would be wonderfully chilled by the time she got here. Next I went and found Alec my manager and warned him that Bella would be arriving but she would come in the back way and stay in my office for the duration of her visit. I asked him to watch out for her arriving in the cab, meet her and bring her to my office, but not enter himself. As soon as I was sure he understood exactly what I needed of him I went to the kitchen and organised a platter of nibbles in case she was hungry when she got here. Bella frequently worked through the day without a break often forgetting to stop and eat, so I was forever sending food in or making sure she had something as soon as she got home. Finally I went back into my office, made sure everything was ready and then stripped off and stepped into my private shower.

I took my time, making sure everything was shaved properly and I was really smooth everywhere. I cleaned my teeth and towel dried my hair dragging my fingers through it to try and get some semblance of order. I walked back into my office and after checking the time sat down buck naked behind my desk and waited.

She was bang on time. Alec knocked on my door and opened it making sure he didn't look in or enter as I'd instructed him. He ushered Bella in to the office and closed and locked the door behind him. She was so confused that she didn't really look for me for a few seconds, which gave me time to sit and enjoy the view in front of me. She had on a tight purple pencil skirt that was split up the back and a pale lilac silk blouse. She had released he hair from the tight braid she had put it in this morning so it was flowing freely down her back and it was really wavy. Her legs were encased in hose and she had the black 'fuck me' heels on that I loved.

"Well good evening Miss Swan how can I help you?" I said as I stood up from behind my desk and walked towards her.

"Fuck Edward! Why are you naked? Not that I'm complaining…." she said as she took a step towards me.

"Bella, I have racked my brains for the past six months, trying to decide how to propose to you. I have researched every supposedly romantic city on earth, I have looked at cruises, hot air balloons, carriage rides and even hiring public buildings so I could prove to you how serious I was and how much I loved you, but as ever you are way ahead of me. So with that in mind I decided to go the opposite way. This is me stripped bare in front of you, telling you that I will love you forever and that I can't wait for you to be my bride, no my wife, my lawfully wedded wife. Bella I know I've already agreed to marry you but I want the chance to ask too, so will you marry me sweetheart, will you be my wife?"

I knelt down on one knee and opened the blue tiffany box and held the ring up for her to see.

"Oh Edward it's beautiful, of course I'll marry you, I love you so much"

I stood up and slipped the ring from the box and onto her finger. It looked beautiful and as I picked up her hand I kissed each one of her fingers and then her wrist.

"Well now the future Mrs Cullen I have you here in my office and you can't leave until we close, what am I going to do with you?" I asked as I started to unbutton her blouse.

"Well you have a rather comfy couch if my memory serves me right, so I'm sure we can keep ourselves entertained" she said as she grabbed my arms and pushed me down onto it telling me to stay there and keep my hands to myself.

Bella then undressed slowly in front of me watching my reaction as she opened every button on her blouse and slid it off her body. I watched as she let her skirt pool on the floor and kicked off her heels. Finally she removed her bra and panties and once she was naked reached for the champagne bottle and poured two glasses. Passing one to me she proposed a toast

"Edward, to us, to the rest of our lives, and to our love".

I couldn't have agreed more. I needed to get her down the aisle as quickly as possible but first my future wife was standing in front of me naked and we had all evening to ourselves to enjoy that fact. I didn't intend to waste any time.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

AJG needs a writing credit on this as I just couldn't get the conversation with Edward's mother to work, so thank you as ever I couldn't do this without you.


	63. Deprivation Futuretake part five

Deprivation

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

3 months after Edwards's proposal

BPOV

"Mrs Isabella Cullen, Mrs Isabella Swan- Cullen, Mrs Isabella Cullen-Swan or maybe Mr Edward Swan"

No matter how many times I said the names out loud I still had to give a little squeal afterwards. I couldn't believe we were getting married in three months time. No messing about planning for months like Rose and Emmett, we had decided not to wait and to just go with what felt best for us. Edward wanted to be involved, no "just let me turn up on the day" jokes, he was adamant he was only getting married once so he wanted the full experience and that meant helping with everything.

We had invited everyone over for dinner the weekend after his surprise proposal and announced our engagement again, and after some serious questioning and ribbing from Emmett, Edward had admitted his rather unorthodox proposal.

"Seems ok to me" Jasper said "I was naked when I proposed"

"Yep so was I" Emmett admitted.

We all looked at Bree and Julie-Anne and it was Emmett as expected who made the comment.

"Now if you two want to spill any news, I certainly want details if you were both naked" he said rubbing his hands together.

"Well actually we do have news, but we weren't going to say anything because this is Bella and Edward's night of celebration" Bree answered as Rosalie was busy slapping Emmett for his salacious remark.

"Well what is the news? Come on tell us" he said. I already had a good idea as I'd known Bree long enough to see the changes in her.

"We're pregnant" she said as Rosie and Alice let out a huge scream and started to rush towards the end of the table.

"Err…. I don't understand, you need a man…. you know his love juice to get pregnant" Emmett said looking at Julie-Anne in a strange way.

"Emmett relax. We bought the sperm from a specialist clinic and I was inseminated with it, we were very lucky it took first time." Bree responded.

"Oh a turkey baster baby" Emmett blurted out before receiving another slap from Rosalie. "You know I'm super fertile and I have plenty of lovelove juice, you should have asked me. I wouldn't have charged you"

It only took a few seconds for the whole table to dissolve in laughter and then another minute or so before Julie –Anne was able to thank him for his offer but assure him that he hadn't really given much thought to the consequences of him being the donor.

"Oh I don't know, I quite like the idea of the world being full of little Emmett Junior's" this set the table off again.

It took a threat from Rosalie that he wouldn't ever be able to have children after she'd finished with him to actually get him to shut up.

The next half hour or so was taken up with baby talk as we checked on Bree's condition and how far gone she was. It turned out she was just out of her first trimester so they felt relaxed enough to start telling us.

Eventually we returned back to the subject of our engagement and as Jasper raised his glass to make a toast to us I couldn't help but pinch myself. Here I was with the love of my life, living this incredible life and we were getting married, plus I was surrounded by my good friends and couldn't have been happier.

As soon as the conversation died down a little I leaned across to Rose, "Rosie you are my dearest friend, would you please be my Matron of Honour?"

"Of course I will be Bella, I'm surprised you even had to ask" She leaned forward and hugged me. "I'm so happy for you" she said as she hugged me tighter.

"Alice would you and baby Jasmine please be my bridesmaids? We can have a little dress made to match yours and she can have a little teddy bear with a coloured ribbon to match the wedding colours rather than flowers"

"I'd be honoured Bella, but really Jasper can hold Jasmine, he'll be fine won't you" she asked turning to Jasper for confirmation.

"Well Alice I was going to ask Jasper to stand as my best man and Emmett as my groomsman" Edward said as he looked at the two guys sat round the table.

"I'd be honoured Edward" Jasper said leaning across the table to shake Edward's hand.

"Yeah can I organise the bachelor night," Emmett asked as he raised his glass to Edward.

Later on in bed after everyone had left, I was lying in Edward's arms. We were just cuddling, the closeness was something I would never take for granted, the feeling of security and being loved and just belonging to him, to us, it was something I never thought I would ever really experience.

"So sweetheart, how are the plans going are we on track with everything?" Edward asked as he stroked the back of my neck. How he expected me to concentrate when his fingers were stroking my skin I don't know.

"Yes the venue for the reception is booked, I just have to notify numbers, the cake is ordered as is the photographer, the flowers and the caterers. I went with the same caterer as Rosie as their wedding breakfast was so good."

"So we have what left to do?"

"You have to take the boys to get your suits ordered. I need to finally choose between the three dresses I have on order and Rosie and Alice need to settle on theirs. Alice is desperately trying to get rid of the last bit of baby weight and Rosie says she is trying to get rid of her Emmett weight, whatever that is."

"Well if Rosalie is eating the same meals as Emmett she will be eating loads "he sniggered.

"All I need to do is send out the invitations but to do that I really need the guest list from your Mother. I have asked her twice but she keeps saying that' it's a work in progress' and she will get it to me as soon as possible."

"Look there is no one that she will want there that either of us would be bothered about. To be honest so long as my Dad is present on the day I don't really care. I'll call her tomorrow and find out just what she is planning"

"We still need a band or a singer, some entertainment for the evening party, can you see if you can find something, if the worst happens we could just use the ipod in the dock"

"Leave that with me sweetheart, I will find someone, now sleep because if I have to face my Mother tomorrow I need to be well rested" he said as he snuggled even closer.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

EPOV

"So Jones how are you today?" I asked as he answered the door to me at my Parents house. It is quite sad that I am not allowed to walk straight into my childhood home. No I have to be announced and before that to wait for the door to be answered.

"I'm fine Mr Edward. Your mother on the other hand is not good, ever since she realised you were serious about getting married she has been in a foul mood. She is, shall we say, a little difficult to deal with at the moment"

"Well let's get this over with then because I'm about to really upset her" I said as I walked towards the library.

"Good morning Mother, how are you today?" I asked as I leant over to kiss her cheek as she expected. I was hit by the aroma of Gin mixed in with the Chanel No5 she had worn for as long as I could remember.

"I'll be a lot better when you come to your senses. Have you ended this farce of an engagement yet?" she asked. There wasn't any hint of a slur in her speech, so I'd caught her earlier enough.

"No Mother I haven't and I'm not going to. In fact that's why I'm here. Do you have your guest list so I can go through it please? This is not going to be a huge production, it's just an intimate ceremony so I need you be very selective on who you would like to invite"

"How could I possibly try and decide who to invite Edward? You know with my social standing that this wedding, if it must happen, needs to be a large society event. My guest list alone is 752 people and that is before I check with your Father to see if he wants to add anyone."

"Mother that is a totally ridiculous number of people, here I was expecting to argue with you over fifty guests because that would be too many." I was livid, she was determined to turn this in to a circus.

"You can't possibly get married in front of such a small crowd. I will be the laughing stock of the country club, please tell me you have at least booked the country club for your wedding breakfast".

Her glass was getting emptier as each question was followed by a large gulp with Jones coming into the room to top her up.

"No mother we are not having anything at your beloved country club. We have booked a lovely roof top banqueting suite in one of the new hotel's down town. It's what we want and as far as I'm concerned as long as you, Father and Jones are present I really am not interested in anyone else."

"Now I will give you the rest of the day to decide. Here is a save the date card so you can check your extensive diary to make sure you are available, You need to let me know by tonight who you would like to invite, but keep in mind it is mine and Bella's day, not yours. I will not have total strangers at my wedding just so you can keep your so called standing in the community".

"Bye Mother" I said as I turned and walked towards the door.

"Mr Edward I am so grateful that you would consider inviting me to your wedding, I'd be honoured to attend" he said as he helped me on with my coat.

"Of course you will be there Jones. I'll send the invite but I can tell you we have booked the reception at The188 Hotel, do you know it? It's a new boutique hotel in the city, so make sure you keep the date free. If mother gives you any problems, let me know and I will talk to Father".

As I drove back towards Bella I was once again reminded of how lucky I was, this beautiful woman who was so loving and giving, everything my mother wasn't. I couldn't wait to marry her.

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

BPOV

It had taken me several hours and a very long messy massage to calm Edward down after his visit to his Mother, he was so annoyed but I needed him to see that we would be fine with or without her input.

The next couple of days passed in a blur, I confirmed the cake, the flowers and the wedding colours and set up an appointment for Rose and Alice. I just needed the final numbers for the caterers and the hotel. As I sat at my desk with my first coffee of the morning trying to figure out a seating plan my mobile rang. I wasn't too surprised, I could see it was the caterer and they knew I started work early so I answered instantly

"Hello its Bella"

"Miss Swan, I'm just ringing to let you know that we have been able to refund your deposit as we have managed to resell the date already. We understand how hard things must be for you at this time so as we have already refunded your credit card, all this dreadful business is now finished"

Before I could say anything the woman rang off, if I had heard her correctly they had just refunded our deposit because we had cancelled the caterers. I sat staring at my phone wondering what the hell had just happened when it rang again.

"Miss Swan this is Jackie at The 188 hotel, I'm just ringing to confirm that as you no longer want the reservation for your wedding, we have a waiting list and I have been able to resell the date very easily" she said.

"Erm I'm sorry Jackie, I really don't know what you are talking about I haven't cancelled anything and I'm quite sure Edward hasn't either." I told her "Please keep the booking live and I will get back to you in ten minutes when I have checked with Edward."

"Oh I presumed it was you who left the message on the machine late last night, you just gave your names, the date of the event and explained that the wedding had been cancelled so you wouldn't require the room"

"Well l I can assure you it hasn't been cancelled, please keep the booking in place and if you need my future husband to speak to you he will" I was almost begging here, I really couldn't find another venue at such short notice.

"I'm really sorry Miss Swan I have already confirmed a deal with a new client. Your instructions on the message you left were very precise."

As soon as I put my cell phone down I fell apart. What the hell was going on? I tried to get hold of Edward but I knew it was a long shot as he was travelling today, having gone to look at a building in New York as his next location. It was a big decision for him because it would tie up most of the capital he had in his business, but if it worked it could provide a huge revenue stream for him.

I tried his phone about a dozen times but he wasn't answering. As I finally gave in and accepted I would just have to wait for him to get my messages my phone rang again. I was almost frightened to answer it but I knew I needed to deal with whatever it was,

"Miss Swan, this is Jenna from The Bridal Boutique we need to confirm that you definitely no longer require the wedding dresses we are holding for you, as we explained you will lose the sizeable deposit you left if you are not going to…"

This time I didn't even let her finish I was ready for her

"No stop, Jenna did you say your name was? I have most definitely not cancelled anything. I will be in as arranged on Saturday to make a final decision and to get fitted. Please tell me you haven't let my appointment go".

"No Miss Swan we haven't let it go, it does happen now and again, a jealous ex-girlfriend or a malicious relative or co-worker loves to think they can cause trouble, that is why we always check personally with our clients"

"Well what a shame some other places don't have that same policy. I will be there on Saturday I promise" I told her. One she confirmed we were ok and I had made her promise to call me before changing anything I was able to let her go.

As I sat at my desk, I could feel the tears of anger and frustration running down my face, I was also a nervous wreck, it was obvious someone who knew our plans very well was trying to wreck our day, in fact they were trying to make sure it didn't happen.

As the reality of the mornings phone calls kicked in I realised I need to find a new venue and a new caterer. I also needed to check with everyone else that nothing else had been cancelled. That was going to take time so I packed up my desk and headed home. As I stopped by Aro's office to let him know I needed the rest of the day, I saw Jessica and Lauren giggling in the break room. Now rational thought should have kicked in and told me that they couldn't have been laughing at me, they knew nothing of my plans to even get married never mind any specifics, but I was so angry, all I could hear was the woman from the hotel saying ' a young woman' had cancelled the venue.

I was halfway into the room ready to tear both of them to shreds, when Aro called to me from further down the corridor, deciding I would deal with the two skanks later I went into my boss and explained what had happened.

…

A/N

This was the best place to break the looooong chapter I wrote so part two will be up soon.

As ever thanks to AJG for making this readable.


	64. Deprivation Futuretake part six

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

Happy Easter Folks, hope you all have a lovely break, loads of chocolate and some family time .

EPOV

Fuck what an amazing building, it is perfect for my new club, the location is just on the edge of the city, close enough to be easily accessible but away from the gridlock traffic. It is in fairly decent condition so we should just need to remodel not actually rebuild and the price whilst extortionate by what I'm used to spending, by New York real estate prices, not too bad at all. It will put a squeeze on my cash flow but I could use some of my trust fund instead of going to the bank or maybe it's even time to look for an investor, maybe my father or Jasper would be interested.

My mind was full of possibilities as I shook hands with the realtor and let him know I would be back to him soon and thanked him for meeting with me early in the day, I'd grabbed an early flight leaving Bella tucked up in bed this morning. I really needed to talk to a few people now, my father, my accountant, Jasper and my trust fund executor, as well as my future wife. I loved that phrase, my future wife, I also needed to talk to Carlisle to look the place over as my architect and see if Charlie was available to project manage.

As I walked to the nearest Starbucks to grab a coffee and just sit for a few minutes to digest what I had seen I finally checked my phone. It had been vibrating in my pocket for the duration of my site visit. I suspected it was probably Bella ringing with wedding stuff as she was going to have a first stab at the seating plan this morning. The reality was I was having a ball being in on all the decision making but if I'm honest I would not have volunteered if I'd realised how much work was involved. I mean how hard can it be to pick a Wedding Breakfast menu? Apparently it's very hard, taking the two of us at least three sittings and twenty four different combinations before we got the perfect menu. I think I would have rather had something less formal, but Bella was over the moon with it so that was fine with me.

Another reason I hadn't being answering is because the calls from my Mother are getting more and more heated. I haven't told Bella because I don't want to upset her but since my mother tried to call my bluff a few days ago by informing me she wouldn't be coming to the wedding and I told her that was fine, I was perfectly happy to get married without her being there she has gone into overdrive. According to Jones she is drinking Gin with her breakfast and by mid-afternoon is positively hateful. I'm not really sure how he can tell any difference but he assures me he can.

After half a cup of coffee I finally call Bella

"Hey sweetheart, wait until you see the building it is incredible, it has loads of the original features still in it as well as some old stained glass windows, I can see the finished picture, it could be amazing"

I was met with silence, "Bella are you there?"

"Yes Edward I'm here, I'm just trying to find some happiness in this fucked up day to share this moment with you"

"Bella what has happened, you sound strange, where are you, are you ok?"

"I'm at home, I've had a very large glass of wine, no make that two, oh actually make that a bottle and no I'm not all right"

With that I heard the bottle drop to the floor and Bella start crying.

"Shit Bella what the hell happened, talk to me baby, what is wrong?"

She tried to tell me, but she was sobbing so hard I only really got an idea, I knew something had happened to the venue and the caterers but I wasn't sure what.

"Baby why don't you go and take a nap and I'll be there soon. I'm going to the airport now to see if I can get an earlier shuttle, I don't really need to fulfil the rest of my appointments today, I 've seen what I want" I told her , I was already out in the street trying to flag down a cab to take me to the airport.

I couldn't listen to her cry, so as soon as I was in the cab I called Rosalie.

"Hey Edward I thought you were out of state today?"

"I am but I need a favour. Have you heard from Bella today? Something has happened, she just left me loads of messages asking me to call her and when I finally did she was drunk and crying. Now I'm on my way to the airport but it's going to be ages before I can get there, can you get the girls together and see if one of you can get over to the apartment to see if she is ok?

"Edward it's barely lunchtime are you sure she was drunk?"

"Yes she said she had already drunk a bottle of wine"

"Shit, I'm on my way over there now, I'll call you as soon as I see her"

"Thanks Rosalie I'll be there as fast as I can"

Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

RPOV

I can't remember the last time I'd seen Bella drunk in the day, that alone worried me as I made my way to her. I tried to call but all I was getting was voicemail, so I presumed she had turned her phone off. Thinking about it I hadn't seen her behave like this since she took to her bed after she found out Edward was her Mystery Man.

When I got to their building the doorman was waiting for me. Edward had called ahead and warned him I might need to get in the apartment because Bella was sick. Luckily it was the regular guy and he recognised me instantly. We went up and after banging on the door a couple of times he let me in with his master key.

As I stepped into the hallway I could tell Bella was upset because instead of everything being in its proper place her bag, coat, shoes, laptop case and purse were all just dumped in a heap by the door. As I walked towards the main room I could hear snoring, really loud rip roaring snoring and the sight that met me made me both laugh out loud and panic at the same time.

Bella was passed out on the sofa. There was one empty bottle on the floor and a half empty wine bottle on the table. Her wedding file that Alice had made for her was destroyed and looked as though she had just thrown into the air. It was everywhere, photos, menu's, contracts and lists all ripped up. Looking at her I could tell that she had been crying hard, her face was red, blotchy and very puffy, she looked so sad even as she was sleeping. I quickly but quietly got to work, I texted Edward to let him know I was with her and that I would call him later, I called work and told them I needed a personal day and I messaged Emmett to tell him to meet me at Bella's place when he was done with training. Next I grabbed a blanket and covered her so she could sleep off the alcohol and the washing up bowl just in case. I'd known Bella long enough to know he was liable to wake up feeling sick.

Next I tried to make some sense of what was left of her wedding folder, nothing seemed to have survived so I gathered it all together to see if I could work out what had happened. Once I had everything cleaned up I found her phone under the mess and started to look at her call history. It took about half an hour and lots of searches on Google but it became clear she had rung just about every decent hotel and event venue within the local vicinity. I'd been with her and Edward when they had looked at The 188 hotel so I quickly called up the event coordinator and asked her what was going on. It took a lot of cajoling and several nasty threats before she explained that someone had cancelled the booking and she had resold it before checking with Bella. She also let slip that the caterer's had also been on to them to confirm that they had been cancelled. It was that that had prompted her to resell the booking. Suddenly everything made sense, we had just 10 weeks to the wedding and they had no venue or caterer and by the looks of the scribblings on the pad that had survived someone had also tried to cancel her dress.

I checked Bella was ok and went in to the kitchen to call Edward. He was sitting in the airport lounge waiting for the next flight back to Chicago, luckily he'd managed to get bumped up so he would be here in a couple of hours. I explained what I had found out and told him that I would stay till he got back here and that I would work through the rest of the bookings to make sure nothing else had been cancelled.

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EPOV

Three hours it took to get back and every second was torture. I kept calling Rose to make sure Bella was alright and luckily she was still fast asleep, I could hear her snores every time I spoke to Rosalie. All that was going through my mind was who could do this? Who was spiteful and vindictive enough to want to ruin our wedding day? My mind didn't want to accept the most logical explanation, my Mother, I kept trying to think of anyone we might have upset over the last couple of years and came up blank each time. No stalkerish ex partners, ok maybe Renee, but her and Garrett were still together as far as I knew and the last time I asked Emmett told me Garrett was being transferred to another soccer team in LA and Renee was going with him. No matter how I much I hated the possibility, this really did have my Mother written all over it.

I finally got home to find Bella sitting up on the couch with a cup of black coffee in her hands, there were bottles of water and pills in front of her. Rosalie was sitting at the dinner table, going through what looked like several different piles of torn up paper.

"Thank fuck you're finally here" Bella said as she raced into my outstretched arm, where she promptly burst into tears.

I looked over at Rosalie and raised my eyebrows, this was not good.

Finally Bella calmed down and I walked us over to the sofa and sat down, pulling her onto my lap and she just moulded in to me, it felt as though she was trying to disappear inside me, as though she couldn't get close enough.

"Well now you're back I can confirm that you no longer have a reception venue or a caterer but we have everything else. I called them all from this folder and explained there would be a change of venue and that we would get back to them as soon as possible. I did ask everyone if they could suggest anywhere that might have the date free…. but at the moment nothing I'm afraid" Rosalie was as direct as ever and for once I was glad of it, we all knew where we stood and what needed to be done.

"Bella sweetheart are you alright?" she was trembling in my arms and I could see from her face that the tears were just there ready to fall.

"Hey come on, between us we can fix this. I promise you that we are going to get married on the day we have planned, I don't care if it is at the court house and we go to McDonalds after because as long as you become my wife nothing else matters."

With that she burst into tears again and I wasn't quite sure what I had said to cause that, I looked at Rosalie and she just smiled at me.

"Come on Bella let's get you into a nice hot bath and then into bed, you are exhausted and hungover which is never a good combination for you" Rosalie said as she helped Bella to her feet. I watched as my usually vibrant beautiful strong girl shuffled off after her friend like a little lost puppy. If I hadn't been so angry I would have been scared at just how much she was falling apart, but I understood because I'd been with her every step of the way with the planning and she had put everything into this day, she wanted it to be a reflection of our love for each other and every detail had been almost micro managed.

I quickly got changed in my closet, I could hear Rosalie talking to Bella as she stripped her off and got her in the tub, she was patient as Bella kept sniffing and having a little cry. I stood in the doorway of our bathroom and I was torn, part of me wanted to be the one looking after Bella, it was my job, she was my fiancée but I just couldn't bear to see her so upset but I knew she was better off with Rosalie so I went into the main room to make the call that could possibly change a part of my life.

"Hi Dad how are you?"

"Well that depends, you're calling me Dad which means your Mother is nowhere close by either of us which is always a bonus"

I couldn't help but smile at his logic. I knew he spent as much time away as possible and who could blame him? What mother didn't know was that my father had a special membership to all my clubs which gave him unlimited access where ever he was and he would normally let me know where he was going to be so I got to spend time with them there. He was nowhere near as busy as he made out to my Mother. In fact a couple of months ago he finally admitted to me he had an apartment in the city my mother knew nothing about and he spent a lot of his "business" time there.

I explained to him what had happened to our plans and that I thought Mother was behind it.

"Well it certainly sounds like something she would be capable of Edward, the easiest way to check is to call the country club."

"Why?"

"Well think about it Son, if she is cancelling your plans then she more than likely has alternative plans already in place. She wants the wedding to be on her terms having come to the realisation that you are going to marry the lovely Bella. Look, leave it with me, I'll call the country club and see what I can find out and I'll call you straight back Son"

I said goodbye and thought about what he had said, if he was right there was only one caterer she would chose and it was easy to google the number.

"Good Afternoon how may I help you?"

"Hi this is Edward Cullen I need to enquire about…." Before I could say anything else who ever had answered the phone cut right across me.

"Mr Cullen we have been expecting your call, though your mother did say it would probably be a in a few days' time. I can understand how excited you are and to throw a surprise wedding so the bride can relax and not worry is very understanding of you. You are very lucky you have such a wonderful Mother, she has everything arranged, the numbers have been finalised at 800, the menu has been agreed and we are just waiting for the last few name from you so we can add them to the seating plan, so when can we expect those please?"

I sat staring at my phone too shocked to even respond, it was only when I heard the voice say "Hello, hello, Mr Cullen are you there?" That I realised she was waiting for an answer from me.

"Erm…. I will get back to you shortly" I said before hanging up.

My phone rang and I could see it was my Dad

"Hi Dad "

"Hello Son. Well it looks like your Mother has out done herself this time, the club is booked in my name, she has a full formal reception ready to go for 800 people, the best champagne and an orchestra and get this, she is even flying in some special pastor to officiate the wedding"

"Yes I gathered, I just spoke to her favourite caterers and they confirmed that they had a booking for 800 and everything was confirmed, numbers, menu everything. Shit this is not what we want Dad, we don't want a society wedding. We wanted something small and intimate, our close friends and family that's all." I told him as my head dropped into my hands.

"Edward you will have whatever you want, now her mistake was to book it all in my name, it means I can cancel it, so I will call now and do that, and I'll instruct them not to tell her, it's as easy as that".

"Wait though, before you do that, we do need a venue, let me talk to Bella first, can you come over tomorrow night so we can talk this over?"

"Of course I will Son, I won't do anything until I hear from you and I'll see you tomorrow evening"

Just as I was finishing up Rosalie came back in to the room, I looked behind her for Bella but she was alone.

"She has had a bath, been sick and now after taking half a sleeping pill is already fast asleep, I would leave her to rest, this had really hit her hard, she keeps mumbling about not being good enough for you and asking what did she do to make her hate her so much? I'm not quite sure what that means are you?" Rosalie asked

It seems my Bella had worked out that my Mother was behind all this so I spent the next fifteen minutes bringing Rosalie up to speed on what Dad and I had found out. Rosalie went ballistic and it was only the fact that she wasn't sure where my childhood home was that stopped her from going to sort my Mother out for Bella. It took another ten minutes and a call to Emmett to finally calm her.

"Look I'll take it from here, can you give us today to get our heads around everything and come back tomorrow evening? My dad will be here and we can sort everything out, worst case scenario is that we do now have caterers and a venue."

"Over your Mother's fucking dead body. I'm sorry she maybe your mother Edward but after this stunt there is no way you are getting married there, we will sort something out".

With that Rosalie left leaving me with the first peace and quiet of the day.

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AN

Ok what started out as a future take has taken on a life of its own and seems to be quickly turning into a sequel. I have decided to do one or two more chapters after this and then I am going to shelve it for a while. I do have an idea for the sequel so bear with me.

In the mean time I really need to try and expand the plot bunny that is fighting for space in my brain.

Please keep me on alert and as soon as I'm ready with a few chapters beta'd I'll start posting again.

Alicia xx


	65. Deprivation Futuretake part seven

Deprivation Future take part 7 Chapter 65

Disclaimer the author does not own any publically recognizable characters herein. No copyright infringement is intended

EPOV

The sleeping pill Rosalie gave Bella knocked her out for the rest of the day and all through the night, my girl must have been running on empty for quite a while so I just let her sleep. She never moved when I slipped into bed or when I got out again the next morning. Luckily I had an easy day today, I needed to make a couple of calls to talk to Carlisle and Charlie and to rearrange to see the other properties I missed yesterday, but I could sort all that in less than 30 minutes. Today was about making sure Bella was ok and forming a plan of attack on my Mother.

As I sat nursing my first coffee of the day I couldn't help but reflect on how selfish my Mother could be. She had intentionally caused all this pain and chaos just so she could have her own way, there was no consideration for my feelings or Bella's just her own so she could be seen to 'measure up' or be better than the rest of her social circle at the club. All my young life she had forced me to do what she wanted, I'd attended music lessons, dance classes, even at one stage etiquette lessons just so she could have the perfect son. My Dad finally put his foot down when two things happened; the first was when she threatened to send me to elocution lessons so I could get rid of my American/Chicago accent because she wanted me to speak with a British accent, being convinced I would get further in life if I spoke like the English Royal family! The second was when she banned me from calling my Dad 'Dad' she told me that I was to call him 'Father' or if I wanted I could refer to him by his first name, Edward Senior and that was also was extended to her. No Mommy, Mama or Mom, it was to be Mother or Elizabeth her Christian name. To this day I call him Dad when I talk to him, but refer to him as Father when I'm talking about him to anyone out of force of habit.

Finally around 10.3am Bella woke, she was groggy and completely oblivious to how long she had slept, so she was a little shocked when I told her I'd called the office and warned them she wouldn't be in today because she was under the weather.

"Edward, why did you let me sleep in so late? I have so much to do today" she said as she tried to talk to me, yawn and rub the sleep out of her eyes all at the same time. She was so gorgeous, I think in that instant I fell in love with her all over again, my beautiful, beautiful Bella.

"I let you sleep Sweetheart because you obviously needed it. You only had half a pill which really should have just helped you sleep naturally, not knock you out for about 18 hours. Now don't worry I've called your boss so they know you're not well, I just have a few calls to make and once I've done that we can sit and sort out this mess and fix it, ok?" as soon as the words left my mouth I knew I'd said the wrong thing, her bottom lip started to tremble and her eyes glassed over as she fought to hold back her tears.

"Edward, am I really such a bad choice of a wife for you? Why doesn't she like me?" she asked

At the moment I hated my Mother, real pure hatred. She had disregarded my feeling so many times and rode roughshod over my choices because they didn't agree with hers that I was almost immune to her, but now she was affecting Bella's life too it was time to take a stance.

"Sweetheart you are my choice for my wife. I love you and only you and believe me no one my Mother has paraded in front of me has ever caused a flicker of emotion, never mind come anywhere near to what I feel for you" I wasn't about to tell Bella about the numerous times she had tried to get me to call off the engagement because that was in the past and was staying there. "The problem is , she didn't choose you, or have any say in the planning of our special day, it's not that she doesn't want us to get married, she just wants us to get married her way, and on her terms."

It was at the point I realised that Bella didn't know what my Dad and I had found out.

"Bella it was probably one of my Mother's associates that cancelled everything. Dad thinks she promised them either a seat on one of her charity committees or a dinner invitation to meet some minor celebrity or politician, not because she didn't want us to get married but because she didn't agree with how we were planning to get married. I spoke to my Dad last night after you were asleep and between us we found out that the country club and her favourite caterers are both booked and the guest list is all but sorted. She has catered for 800 which means all her social circle, every Senator, Governor, minor Royal or z list celebrity she has ever crossed path is on the guest list"

I took a breath, mainly to let Bella digest the information I was telling her, she looked shocked at first and I was waiting to see what happened next. I was hoping she would be angry, that I could work with because I'd spent so many years angry at my Mother for one thing or another. What I wasn't expecting was the look of utter defeat and compliance that appeared on her face.

"Well as much as I would like a small intimate wedding, if it causes less hassle and everyone is happy then I suppose we could go with what your Mother has planned. I mean where else are we going to get decent caterers and a venue at short notice anyway?"

She tried so hard to say that with a smile on her face, but to be honest it came across like there was a bad smell in the air she was trying to ignore. It was so obvious that she didn't want the huge production and I was even more determined, if that was possible, to make sure she had exactly what she wanted. The more I thought about it I just wanted something small and soon, the sooner the better, I just wanted her as my wife, and everything else was just fluff and trimmings.

"Rosalie is coming over tonight as is my Dad, if you want we can call Jasper and Alice and between us see what we can come up with, how does that sound ?"

She nodded and tried to smile, but it looked more like a grimace, " If everyone is coming over I'd better get ready, the apartment could do with a clean and I need to get some food underway, what do we have in?" she was already off to try start looking for imaginary dust.

"Bella stop! The cleaners were in yesterday, it is only 11am we have hours before anyone is due here and to let's be honest it would be easier to just order in pizza so people can snack when they are hungry. "

Before she could find another objection I grabbed hold of her and took her over to the sofa, pulling her onto my lap as I sat down. I took the hair tie I knew she kept around her wrist and pulled her hair up into a high ponytail. She sat in my lap like a little girl, waiting for me to tell her what to do, part of me wanted to shake her to tell her to fight back and not let my Mother win, but the rest of me understood that she was almost mourning the loss of the wedding she had all planned out in her head.

"Ok sweetheart listen to me. We are not having our wedding at the country club, I will not marry you in those circumstances. I would rather we waited another six months or until we could get another date at the 188 hotel. I want you to have everything you dreamed of because believe me if I have any say at all you are never getting married again, so we need to make sure you get everything you want this time."

This caused her to smile, the first real smile I'd seen for the last 24 hours. I leaned forward to kiss her, it seemed such a long time since I'd felt her lips on mine so I lightly pressed against them. Her hands moved into my hair and she pulled my face towards her as she started to almost devour my lips. At first I responded, it was easy to lose myself in her, the taste of her skin, the feel of her tongue as she pushed it deep into my mouth. I was just thinking about removing her t shirt so I could get a mouthful of her gorgeous nipples when I heard a tell-tale sniffle.

"Bella love what's wrong? Please don't let her get to you because she really isn't worth it." I tried to calm her down but it was just easier to let her get it all out so we sat for about 30 minutes until she was back to just sniffing and wiping her nose on my shoulder.

"Right Bella, enough, come on pull yourself together and get angry. Angry I can understand and deal with and anger you can channel so we can make some plans later. I 'm also thinking we haven't had angry sex in a long time so we could try that later."

I leaned forward and gave her a huge exaggerated sloppy kiss, which seeing as she had a snotty nose was not such a good idea, as I pulled back and wiped my mouth on my sleeve she burst out laughing, a real Bella laugh that I loved.

"Ok you are on, let's go out and get some air and have some food, I'm starving and I need to just clear my head."

With that she got up and left me sitting on the sofa, my semi hard dick wondering what had just happened, and me wondering what switch I'd flicked to cause her mood to change.

After a walk around the local park and the farmers market 'my Bella' was almost back. As she relaxed and became engrossed in the food stalls I saw the colour come back into her cheeks.

"Look at these fabulous cheeses, how about we take some and do a big cheese board with some bread and pickles for tonight?" She was busy talking to the stall owner and tasting them so I just stood back and watched her.

An hour and a half and several different weirdly named cheeses later, we were back in the apartment. We had also bought some crackers, fruit and freshly baked French loaves causing an incredible smell in the apartment making me wonder if I could get away with having some now. The rest of the afternoon passed quietly, we cuddled up on the sofa and caught up with some episodes of The Black List and drank tea. Whether she purposely stayed off the subject of the wedding or not, I wasn't sure, but I was glad of the respite knowing that tonight could go either way, either lots of tears or lots of anger.

Finally Rosalie turned up with Emmett in tow, my Dad followed ten minutes later, once they were all seated with a glass of wine, Bella finally joined us and sat by me.

"So how are we going to sort this?" Rosalie asked

"Well from what I can see we have several options" my Dad stated

" First we let everything happen just as my dear wife has planned, that way you get married soon, and your Mother gets the wedding she wants, on her terms. Or you can decide here and now you definitely don't want the country club, I cancel everything as she booked it in my name and we look for another venue and caterer"

"You could just elope and get married in Vegas or at the court house" Rosalie added.

"I could go on line and get ordained so I could marry you like Joey did on Friends. I'm sure we could find somewhere to hold the wedding, hell we could have it at the stadium in one of the VIP boxes" Emmett said. "Or we could ask jasper about using one of his bars, you know he would let you have anything you needed."

"We could put a marquee up in the park. It wouldn't be hard to get permission and you could get married there and we could book a restaurant for the wedding breakfast." Rosalie chipped in.

"You could get married at the house and have a marquee in the grounds. We have enough room, and the only problem would be that you would have to include your Mother in the arrangements. We'd have to keep her on a very tight leash so she didn't interfere again but she could be useful if she was made to help on your terms, and we hid the gin" Dad was on a roll.

"What do you think Bella?" I asked, she had been very quiet while everyone else had been throwing ideas about.

"I have had a brilliant idea, I know exactly where I want us to get married, and can't believe I didn't think about it before" she had a huge smile on her face.

"Ed, thank you for being here with us tonight, I know this is going to cause you loads of aggro from Elizabeth but could you please cancel everything she booked? I think Edward and I should get married at his second Chicago club and have the reception in the restaurant." She turned and smiled at me as she carried on

" We could set up a seating area around the pool and have dancing there later. Your chef and kitchen team can cater the wedding breakfast and the only thing you would have to do is give notice to the members and staff that the club is closed that day. Emmett I just want to say that I really love the idea of you marrying us."

Bella got up and went to give Emmett a hug, before going and hugging my Dad as well. When she came back to sit down I pulled her onto my lap.

"You know there is another alternative. We could have a destination wedding, we could take the people in this room now, plus a few others and we could get married at sunset and party on the beach." I was all for getting her somewhere hot and into a bikini.

"As much as that appeals to me Edward, I really like the idea of getting married at your club. It's special to us because we got back together there, you proposed there and the place is just full of good memories"

I couldn't argue with that logic so said "Ok then, that's that sorted. I will speak with Chef Cheney tomorrow and then we need to wait on Emmett so we know he can definitely marry us."

"Yes" Emmett said as he punched the air," I'll start looking into that as soon as we get home"

It took about another hour but finally everyone was happy enough to leave, safe in the knowledge that everything was now sorted. As soon as we knew when and if Emmett was going to be able to marry us we could arrange a date to suit us and all I needed to do then was post the notice for the members and speak to the staff. If everything went to plan we could be married even sooner than we had originally planned.

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BPOV

The next two weeks were hectic but for once really enjoyable, Emmett was busy sorting out his licence but we knew he would be 'ordained' within the next fortnight so Edward and I had brought the wedding forward. His chef was happy to cook our chosen menu so everything was on track.

The only thing we still needed to tackle was his Mother. Oh joy. She had to know by now we had cancelled the country club and the caterers but she was being very quiet and it was quite unnerving waiting for the backlash. Edward was adamant he didn't really want to speak to her any more than he needed to. He had decided to adopt his Dad's approach and only really interact with her when he needed to for family matters and the occasional important family dinner. The good thing was he was now spending a lot more time with his Dad and their relationship was stronger than ever.

I knew I needed to face her because every morning I woke up dreading that this was the day she would find some way to ruin everything and I was sick and tired of having everything overshadowed by her. This was our wedding and I was going to enjoy it, both the day and run up to it.

"Rosie what are you doing today?"

It was Saturday and Edward and his Dad were heading to New York with Carlisle to look over the building again he was considering for the new club.

"Well I was going to call you and see if you fancied a little light shopping and a trip to see Bree, we can make fun of the fact she is being sick five times a day. I was thinking we could take over ginger ale and stale crackers for her"

"I'm up for that but do you fancy a trip to see 'Old Mother Cullen' first, I really need to go and have a conversation with her and after listening to Edward and his Dad talk we need to get there early before the gin takes over"

"Hell yes there are a few things I would like to say to the old witch myself, I'll be over in an hour"

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Thanks as ever to AJG and Edlovesme. x


	66. Deprivation Futuretake part eight

No copyright infringements are intended. The plot is mine I'm just borrowing the characters

BPOV

I had to do this and today was the perfect day. Edward was back in New York for the day revisiting the potential new club building and his dad had gone with him so I knew she would be alone. Let's face it she was usually alone at the weekend because she did all her' good deeds' during the week. I needed to go early so she wasn't too drunk but I really needed some back up with me just in case. I knew asking Rosie to go with me was risky because I could end up with no Matron of Honour if she was arrested!

By the time Rosie arrived at my home I was having second thoughts though. I know it was cowardly but I didn't want to rock the boat just before we had the wedding, we had three weeks to go and everything was ordered, paid for, confirmed and reconfirmed. Once we were married then I could say what I wanted and damn the consequences but now I was living in a bubble of fear that she would or could still ruin things for us.

"Hi Hun I'm here" Rosie called letting herself in with her key.

I walked in to the hallway to meet her and she took one look at my face.

"You are having second thoughts about going aren't you?"

Before I could even answer her she was on me.

"Look I won't force you to go, we will all rally round and do everything possible to make sure nothing goes wrong, but if you want to wake up every morning dreading what might happen between now and the wedding then that's fine with me, we'll just go and torment Bree instead"

I looked at her for a few seconds weighing up what I really wanted to do, I needed to speak to Mrs Cullen and I needed to do it without Edward there to shield me.

"Let's go before I really change my mind."

I picked up Edward's car keys and the Sat Nav and grabbed hold of Rosalie's arm

"Whatever happens no fighting, spitting, or really bad language unless she starts it, I only have enough bail money on me for one of us so please call Edward once you are out."

"Bella I 'm far more organised than that, I have enough money for both of us and I've already organised us representation, Jack my boss at work is on standby should we need him"

I hoped she was joking but I knew Rosalie and this was far too serious for her to joke about, she was on a mission and anything could happen.

The drive over there was interesting, it took me a couple of miles to get used to the car, it had been ages since I'd driven anywhere. Rosalie kept shouting at the Sat Nav because she didn't like the attitude of the 'voice' directing us. I thought she was just trying to take my mind off where we were going until she actually tried to throw the Sat Nav out of the window, it took me reminding her that I wasn't sure where we were actually going and we needed it to get us there and back into the city, before she calmed down.

We finally pulled into the long drive way and parked the car, the front door opened before we even got out and a man stood looking at us. I knew he was Mrs Cullen's man servant/butler but I couldn't recall his name. To say how long Edward and I had been together I had only been here maybe half a dozen times, each time more awkward than the last.

"Hi I'm Bella, I know I'm not expected but I wondered if I could see Mrs Cullen, I have some wedding details I'd like to go over with her" I was still standing at the side of the car as he walked towards us.

"Does Mr Edward know you are here?" he asked

"No do I need his permission to speak to her" I was confused, what was his problem?

"Of course not, he could probably have given you a few tips on how to deal with her though, let me see how she is at the moment, please stay out here for the time being" he said as he disappeared back inside the house

"What the fuck! Did we just get told we couldn't go in and see her?" Rosalie looked at me and I could see the anger on her face.

"No Rosie he didn't say that, he said he was going to see how she was, maybe she is under the weather or something and not taking guests"

"You are not a guest you are about to be her daughter in law, why shouldn't she want to see you?"

"I don't know Rosie, probably because she doesn't want me to be her daughter in law"

"Well let's go and see then shall we, let's go and find out once and for all what the old witch really thinks"

She was off towards the front door before I could even think about answering her. I finally caught up with her as she pushed the already slightly open front door. We both stepped into the hallway and we could hear the murmur of voices, my first thought was at least she wasn't shouting and screaming but as we made our way into the reception room it was obvious why.

"Yes Mr Edward I'll warn her before I let Bella speak to her, no I'll make sure to stay in the room, I can do that".

"Is he talking to Edward?" Rosalie whispered to me

"Yes I think so, come on let's go and find her while he is busy" I was feeling brave and now was the time to act before we got a chaperone.

I started down the hall looking for Mrs Cullen leaving Rosalie to listen in on the phone call, finally finding her in the conservatory it was obvious she didn't know we were here. She was sat staring out of the windows with a glass in her hand.

"Good morning Mrs Cullen I wondered if you had a moment to talk with me please"

She turned to look at me, the look of sheer disgust on her face made me catch my breath.

"I'm sorry you have me at a disadvantage, have we met?"

"Really? OK, if that is how you want to play this. I've been to this house several times with Edward for dinner and you know perfectly well who I am"

"Oh Betty is it? Is my son with you?" she asked looking round me.

"No Mrs Cullen he's not here, I needed to speak to you without him so we can be honest with one another."

"Really I'm intrigued, whatever could you imagine I have to say to you" she was sipping from her glass all the time she was talking to me, I was hoping it was water but guessing not.

"Mrs Cullen you have caused me so much pain and distress, messing with our wedding plans was unforgiveable but what is really eating away at me is why, why would you do that ?"

"I think the fact you have to ask that, shows just how far removed from our world you are"

"Oh I see so it has nothing to do with me personally, it is just because I'm not part of your country club set"

"Betty dear, not that you could ever be part of the set, as you see them, but I had far higher plans for my son than you. I let him have his youth, his wild disgusting sex life and his freedom because I had plans in place for him. My son was going to be a great man, married into a very important family that would have given him every advantage he needed. I have spent years networking and cultivating acquaintances so I would have access to all of their daughters. You think I am really going to let him settle for a small town girl with no money or class behind her just because he thinks he loves her?"

"Mrs Cullen you really don't know your son very well at all do you? Whilst I might be a small town girl I love your son with all my heart and he loves me. He chose to be with me, I didn't engineer it or force him, and he chose to ask me to marry him. Do you really think you could have forced him into proposing to someone he didn't love just to improve his social standing?"

"Yes I know I could have and still can. He could marry someone suitable, someone who would give him access to more money and power than you could ever dream about. He would dine with presidents, royalty and the real decision makers of the world. If he was careful he could keep you as his mistress or even just carry on picking up the anonymous bodies he has been using since college"

That statement really floored me, she knew all about him, about his 'trysts' in alleyways and car parks, which meant she had kept very close tabs on him.

"Ah Bella I see that you are realising just how much I know about my son, so I suppose you are just about to realise that I also know about his brief membership to that dreadful club and that that is where he met you."

I sat down on the couch, stunned and as I looked at her the smile on her face lit up. She thought she had me, had found my weakness and before I could even answer her she started on me. It hadn't escaped my notice though that she had called me Bella.

"You have a choice, walk away from my son now or I will make sure that the world knows about your seedy little adventure at that club. Do you really want the people at work, your friends and family, to know how you met my son? What will that do to your reputation to know you had sex with a stranger in the dark, you cheap little slut?"

"Just a minute you fucking bitch, who the hell do you think you are, trying to blackmail her?" Rosalie screamed as she rushed into the room.

"Rosalie wait please, I need to sort this. I need to answer her. " I stopped Rosalie walking up to Mrs Cullen and made her stand behind me.

"I'm a cheap little slut, that is what you think do you? So what does that make your son? He was there as well."

"He was sowing his wild oats before he settled down, it's the way of the world Betty, no one would bat an eyelid at his exploits, and they would probably just pat him on the back and laugh." She spat, the venom in her voice was just poisonous.

"So why did you arrange a wedding at the country club for us then?" I was both intrigued and scared at what I was about to hear.

"Oh are you really so stupid? I had everything arranged, I would have smiled my way through the day and just accepted all the pitying looks, but what you would have eventually found out was that the special pastor I flew in was actually an actor. You wouldn't have been legally married and once Edward had tired of you, I could have made everything go away for him. He would have been grateful eventually and then he would have married whomever I picked for him."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, the woman was clearly deranged.

"I am stunned Mrs Cullen that you would stoop so low to get rid of me. I really did come here today hoping that we could at least find some sort of middle ground or even call a truce, that you would understand just how much I love your son. Obviously that is not going to happen, but I will tell you one thing, nothing you could threaten me with could make me leave Edward. I really don't give a flying fuck what people think of me, I know he loves me with his entire being and that is enough for me, so go ahead do your worst, whatever you throw at us won't make a difference. We are getting married very soon and I wouldn't change that for the world."

With that I turned, grabbed hold of Rosalie and dragged her out of the room, as we got to the door , the butler handed me a phone. I looked at him and he just said "speak to him he needs calming down."

"Hello"

"Shit Bella sweetheart are you ok? I'm so sorry about her, I can't believe she would say that to you. Are you ok? Please tell me you are ok"

"Edward did you hear all that?" I was a little confused but catching up fast.

"Most of it yes. Jones was talking to me when you went to talk to Mother so he put me on speakerphone so I could listen"

"I'm fine Edward I just need to get out of here before Rosalie does something stupid, I will speak to you tonight. What time will you be back?"

"Probably around 7.00pm I'll see you then, are you sure you are ok?"

"I'm fine sweetheart I love you, see you later. Have a safe flight home."

I was just about to walk out of the front door when she started again.

"It won't last you know. He needs this life, the money, the breeding, the connections and when he is tired of you and playing at being a model husband he will be back." the venom in her voice was unmistakeable, she really hated me at this point.

"You know you sound like a jilted lover more than his Mother. He doesn't need all that crap, you do. You're the one who is lonely and unloved. I see more of your husband than you do"

She was totally shocked with that statement and I was sorry as soon as I'd said it.

"Oh you didn't know that Ed Senior comes to dinner all the time then? That he spends time with your son, in fact they are in New York today, looking at building that could be the next club."

"I'm not sorry I came here today because I'm glad I know where I stand. We won't ever have to meet again. I won't stop Edward visiting you but you will never, repeat never, have access to your grandchildren, that I can promise. Now I have a bachelorette weekend to sort out and a wedding to finalise so goodbye Mrs Cullen."

With that I walked out and didn't look back. Rosalie was two steps behind me and as soon as the car was unlocked we got in started it up and drove down the drive without looking back.

We'd been driving about twenty minutes when I pulled into a rest stop. I was shaking so badly it wasn't safe for me to drive any further at this point.

"Come on let's get a coffee" Rosalie said as she rubbed my arm.

We settled into a booth in the small diner and as I took my first sip Rosalie spoke

"I'm so proud of you Bella, you said what you needed to, you didn't raise your voice and you didn't let her intimidate you. I know in your place I would have probably lost it with her."

"Rosalie you do this all the time, you're a lawyer." I laughed at her.

"I know but that's different, I almost have a script. I know what I need to say, what information I need to extract, it's all a game in a way, but that…that was personal, she was evil."

"Yes but at least we know she has come to terms with that fact we are getting married. She is playing the long game for now, waiting for him to leave me, so that at least means she won't interfere with the wedding, I hope. I'll leave it to Edward and his Dad to tell her she is not welcome at the ceremony or reception." I took another sip of my hot coffee and let it slip down my throat. As it did I felt the weight of the last few months disappear, she couldn't do anything short of kidnapping one of us to stop our wedding so I was going to enjoy the next couple of weeks.

I'm going to be Mrs Edward Cullen and I really can't wait.

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Well now we know what her plans were….

Thank you to AJG for turning this round for me, she also has the next chapter so it shouldn't be too long to wait.


	67. Deprivation Futuretake part nine

Deprivation chapter 67

No copyright infringement meant, just me playing with the characters.

I couldn't wait to post this, Alison go it back to me a lot sooner than I expected, as ever a big thank you to her, so here is the final chapter in this part of the story…..

It's the wedding day…. finally…. yeah…..

BPOV

Well we are finally here, I'm getting married tomorrow and I couldn't be more excited. I am ready to be Mrs Edward Cullen but to be honest I'm ready to just get the formalities over with and be 100% sure we are married.

After his mother's little confession that she had arranged an actor to marry us, I had spent two days making sure that everything Emmett had arranged was legal and above board and that it was okay for him to officiate. I've worried so much that Edward has actually booked us an appointment at the Court house a few days after we get back from honeymoon so we can check everything and if there is even the slightest doubt, we could just get hitched there and then.

I think the fact that he heard his mother in full flow at her house had convinced him that we needed to be careful. We had gone to great lengths to make sure that we personally invited everyone we wanted at the wedding, the finals numbers barely made 50, so we had plenty of room at the club. The club members understood about the temporary closure, some of them were actually attending the drinks party we were having after our wedding reception. We needed one day to get everything ready and one for the wedding itself. Edward hired a special cover for the pool so that the space could be used as a dance floor. I wasn't convinced and made my mind up to stay off it, but I'd seen him and Emmett jumping about on it today without incident so it should be stable. The chairs are set out and all the floral arrangements are in place. I knew it was a risk but I went to the florist Edward had bought all my flowers from, she did the most amazing arrangements and when I explained what I wanted she was only too eager to help. I also asked her to keep the location a secret if Mrs Cullen enquired and she agreed to so I was happy.

Chef was preparing the rehearsal dinner tonight and then cooking again for us tomorrow so I knew he couldn't be cancelled and most of his suppliers were the best in state so I knew our catering would be top class. We had decorated the restaurant in my wedding colours of purple and silver, along with lovely table decoration of matching candles and flowers. The tables were set up as five rounds of ten so everyone was close together. We decided against a seating plan so everyone could mix in together. I had very little family and Edward only really wanted his Dad and Jones there so the rest of the guests were our friends and they all pretty much knew each other.

Edward and his Dad had gone to speak to his Mother the day after they returned from New York. I wanted to go with them but Edward said he didn't want me around her "evilness" so I stayed home. Listening to the account when they both came back later that afternoon made me glad I hadn't gone. The outcome being that Edward Senior wouldn't formally file divorce papers, but he was moving permanently into his apartment in town. Edward told his Mother she wasn't welcome at the wedding and that until she apologised to me, and meant it, she wasn't welcome in our lives. There was apparently a lot of shouting, glass throwing and bad language and that was just his Mother. We haven't heard a peep from her since but until that ring is on my finger and the wedding certificate is stamped and signed I'm not taking anything for granted.

There are no bedrooms as such at the club, plenty of showers and changing facilities but nowhere to sleep, so Edward and I along with most of our guests are booked into the same hotel we stayed in the night I proposed in DESIRE. I know we should follow tradition and be apart tonight but I really don't think I would get a moments rest if I was here alone. The girls have offered to stay in my room but I just wanted Edward so we have come to a compromise. He is staying with me tonight, then in the morning going to get ready at the club and the girls will then come to our room to help me. It took me a couple of attempts to pack as well as several different lists to make sure I had everything, but it was all now hung up in the hotel. We were also staying there on our wedding night because I didn't want to travel far. I just wanted us to be able to slip off to be alone when we were ready.

It was late afternoon and everything that could be done had been, so we all made our way back to the hotel with a plan to meet up at 7.00pm for dinner. Chef was busy getting everything ready so we knew that there was someone in the club to keep an eye on things.

I walked into our suite and sat down on the bed, kicking off my shoes and letting out a deep groan.

"Sweetheart you really need to calm down. I want us both to enjoy tomorrow and remember it, at this rate you will be too wound up to." Edward said as he started to remove his shoes and socks.

"Do you need a nap or a shower, what about a hot bath would that help?" he asked.

"I just want to marry you Edward, that's all I need".

"Well we have a couple of hours to kill so how about I give you a massage to try and relax you" he said as he started to crawl across the bed towards me.

"Well Mr Cullen I'm sure that would help so where do to you want me?" I asked starting to undo my jeans.

"Well let's see why don't you get naked and I will get some towels and lotion" with that he disappeared into the bathroom, reappearing with an armful of towels.

"Here lie on these "he said handing me the towels as he stripped the top covers down the bed.

I did as I was told, I stripped naked and after positioning the towels I lay face down. The room was lovely and warm and I could hear Edward putting bottles on the bedside table and stripping his own clothes off. I felt the bed dip as he started to crawl towards me, the bed was huge and I was in the middle so we had plenty of room around us.

He straddled me, settling on my thighs, I could feel his warm skin rubbing against me and as he leant forward to reach for the lotion, I could feel he was hard and erect.

The next half hour was blissful as he both teased and massaged me. His warm oily hands stroked every inch of my skin as he started at my shoulders and worked down to my toes. I could feel his hardness rubbing against me as he reached once more to start at my shoulders again.

"Fuck Bella it's no use, I can't wait any longer" he groaned as sat back onto my thighs.

I wasn't quite sure what he was talking about when I felt him start to get off the bed.

"Hey, where are you going?" I pouted.

He didn't answer me and before I could turn round to find out where he was going I felt him grab hold of my ankles and pull me towards the bottom of the bed. What he didn't think about though was that both my ankles and his hands were still slick with oil. Instead of his imagined smooth move of me sliding towards his dick, his hands actually slipped off the end of my feet and he shot backwards falling flat on his ass.

"Oh fuck " was all I heard as I turned round to look for him.

I shot off the bed and found him sat on the carpet, wincing.

"Have you hurt yourself?" I panicked as I bent down to his level.

"I think I burst my balls, when I fell on my ass" he said, the pout on his face a mixture of sulking, frustration and horniness.

"Do you need me to kiss them better? " I asked wondering how we had managed to go from me having a sensual massage to me offering to kiss his balls!

"Well you could, but first I need a cuddle" he said as he pulled me onto his lap. With a slight adjustment I was able to sink down onto his still hard shaft.

"That's better already "he said as he grabbed hold of my hips and started to raise me up and down. There we sat on the floor of the hotel room, me riding him and him helping me, until we both came. Thank goodness my dress tomorrow is floor length because I'd never be able to explain the carpet grazes on my knees!

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EPOV

I take a last look in the mirror in my office. I'm showered, shaved, my hair tamed as much as possible and just putting on my dress shirt when my Dad walks in.

"Good morning Son, you ready to get married today?"

"You have no idea how ready I am Dad. I can't wait to get that ring on her finger and to finally call her Mrs Cullen." I replied as I started to fasten my tie.

"Well we have an hour or so before people start to arrive, so how about we go and have a small nerve steadier in the bar and just make sure that everything is in order" my Dad suggested.

Thinking that one drink couldn't hurt to settle my nerves I nodded and slipped on my jacket.

As we walked down the corridor towards the bar Dad and I were chatting and laughing, I was nervous and excited so when I saw Jones standing in the reception area of the club I never gave it at thought.

"Jones you're early, you are a guest today you know, you don't have to look after anyone" I said as I reached to shake his hand.

"Mr Edward, I am here as your Mother's driver this morning, she is in there looking for you" he said pointing towards the pool area where we had everything set up.

"Fuck!"

"My thoughts entirely" my Dad replied to my expletive.

We walked towards the room not quite sure what to expect. With each step nearer I was straining to hear what Mother was doing, part of me expected to hear the room being trashed.

As I walked through the door, my Dad one step behind me, I was astonished to see my mother sitting in the front row, all dressed up like she was attending the wedding. I could tell she had gone all out with her outfit and over the top hat. I could also see she had the Cullen jewellery on, something that by tradition should go to Bella today.

"Mother I'd like to say it was good to see you, but I can't, so why are you here?"

"Good morning Edward, you are getting married today are you not?

"You know I am and you know you are not welcome, so I'll ask you again, why are you here?"

"Do you honestly think I wouldn't have one last shot at stopping this farce of a wedding? You could come with me now, your Father could explain to everyone how you had changed your mind about marrying Bella. I having been speaking to Governor Pennell's daughter and she is anxious to meet you. Imagine it Edward, you could be married to the future president of America's daughter."

"Mother are you really serious? You are standing here 45 minutes before I am due to get married to the woman I love and you are still trying to fix me up with somebody I have never even been introduced to."

"Well that's easy enough to sort out. She could come to dinner tonight at the house. I'm sure your Father could lower himself for one night to visit his own home" she snarled.

"And there she is, there is my Mother, the one I know and have grown to despise" I couldn't help myself, I had really had enough.

"Mother just please leave now before I say something that I really regret and that I can never take back" I turned my back on her and walked towards the bar we had set up in the corner of the room.

"I'll leave Edward if you promise to come to dinner tonight" She was still in the chair, talking as though this was some kind of family discussion about how we were going to spend the holidays.

"Mother I am marrying Bella, in about 40 minutes. Tonight is my wedding night so I guarantee you I will be too busy to come to dinner tonight, or any other for that matter."

"You won't be if you leave now, you still have time to get yourself out of this mess" she stood up and started to walk towards me.

"Leave now Edward instead of marrying this nobody. Have the future you deserve as my Son. Come to dinner and meet Fleur, you could always keep Bella as your mistress, your Father and most of the men at the country club get through their marriages like that, it's almost expected."

"Mother for the final time, Bella is about to become my wife because I asked her to. She is the woman I love, the only one who will ever be called Mrs Edward Cullen after you are gone, the only woman in my life, my heart and most definitely in my bed."

"I'm very pleased to hear that Edward, because I certainly wouldn't share you"

I turned to the doorway to see Bella stood there flanked by Rosalie and Emmett.

"Sweetheart I'm sorry I didn't want you to hear all this. I was hoping we would have had all this sorted before you arrived" I made my way towards her to make sure she was okay, I needed to touch her, to make sure she understood what was going on.

"It's ok baby I've been here a while. I couldn't wait at the hotel anymore so I made Rosalie bring me over, and seeing as Emmett is marrying us we don't have to wait do we?" she asked

"Oh this just gets better, you're letting a stupid soccer jock marry you" my mother had to comment.

"What the fuck, you gin addled monster" Rosalie was about to explode and I needed to calm things down. Looking over her shoulder I could see most of our guests were crowded into the reception area.

"Please everyone come in and take a seat, Emmett if you want to get to get yourself ready". I grabbed hold of my Dad and pulled him to one side.

"Please keep Bella out of here Dad while I get rid Mother. As soon as you hear the wedding music come back in ok?" My father had agreed to walk Bella down the aisle after her Dad had said he was too busy at work to fly out for the wedding. He wanted her to get married in her home town so he could invite all his friends and neighbours. When she said no he understood and said he would throw a party next time she visited.

I turned to Jones, "Ok we need to get Mother out of here, once she is in the car do not bring her back no matter how much she screams at you, you know she can't function without you so just take her home and keep her there for about an hour so I can get married in peace."

"As sad as I am to miss seeing you marry Miss Bella, Edward I understand" he said as he went to bring the car around to the door.

"Right Mother if you have any hope of maintaining any sort of relationship with me in the future I need you leave now, just go and let me marry the only woman I will ever love."

She looked at me and for the first time in probably 17 years she actually leaned forward and touched me. Ok I kissed her cheek every time I was at the house but that was expected, the mandatory greeting. For her to actually touch me well that hadn't happened since she realised I'd started puberty. At first I wasn't quite sure what she was going to do, it could have been anything from a slap to her grabbing the back of my neck, but she actually laid her hand against my cheek and smiled.

"Dinner will be served at 8.00pm precisely, I'll see you then" she said and then promptly turned and walked out through the reception area without even acknowledging Bella and my Dad.

"Right get your ass down to the front to Jasper and my crazy soccer jock, while I sort your girl out" Rosalie said as she brushed past me and through the door to where I could see my Dad talking to Bella. I was torn I wanted to go to her but I knew I needed to get this wedding under way. So I walked towards Jasper and Emmett, apologising to everyone for the floorshow as I made my way towards my friends.

"You have the rings?" I asked Jasper.

"Yes calm down, we are ready to go" he said

"Edward it's fine, we are ready" Emmett said in a very rare moment of seriousness.

With that the music started, it was a classical piece that Bella loved and I finally saw my girl walking towards me. She looked gorgeous in a floor length champagne coloured dress that followed her silhouette. As my Dad handed her over to me my world settled and everything that I loved and needed in my life was in front of me and I couldn't have been happier.

As a surprisingly restrained and serious Emmett pronounced us Man and Wife I swept my girl into my arms and kissed her with everything I had.

Finally she was mine, and I was hers.

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Beta's note

It has been a joy to watch this story unfold and hear of plot twists and turns from the mind of Alicia. I know a totally new story is currently in development so stay tuned for another great read! I know at some point Deprivation will have a sequel but for now it's time to say goodbye to this Edward and Bella. Alison x


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